Great Rush Quotes
This one's a winner.
This is classic Limba.
He was whining about why Snoot should be able
to break the law and NOT be held accountable.
Word for word:
"There's a BIG difference in defending someone against
an unclear, vague, unproven charge..."
(He suddenly realized that applies to Clinton, too.)
"There's a BIG difference between doing that.... and throwing
stones at someone we KNOW is pock-marked and, terribly so."
Huh?
Didn't Rush once say "Words MEAN things?"
If ANYONE has any idea what the hell he just said,
please contact the offices of RL-LNW.
Congrats to RL-LNW!
On Yahoo, with Netscape, if you punch in "Limbaugh,"
we're the fourth choice on page 2.
We were number 44, on the fourth page.
Now we're on page 2.
This has generated a huge increase in viewer mail.
To: BartCop From: "Phillip H. Blanton" Subject: Your Rush web site
BartCop,
I'm going to pray for you.
And put me on your subscription list.
DAN QUAYLE - STAND UP COMEDIAN
I had dinner at a restaurant on the moon.
Typical Rush Slur:
"On January 23, the NARAL people (abortion rights)
and Demi Moore
If that were even HALF true - using Rush logic - wouldn't that make
Rush, you might be a greedy, self-promoting slug-bastard,
MAILBAG
From: August Giulianelli Subject: Hate Page
Although I am steadfastly against censorship on
the net,
Yours truely,
Auggie
The White House said Friday that since Jim Leach has turned on
Mike McCurry said Rush Limba and the President are scheduled
More on this as it developes.
Dumbass Rush Quotes
"Since Snoot has admitted breaking the law,
--Jan 9, 1997
(Our new Feature, Slappy Teaches Ebonics,
MAILBAG
To: BartCop From: Senator Subject: Re: RL-LNW Volume 82 Laugh a Little
Dear Friend:
Thank you for your recent e-mail message to my office.
You might go easy on Clarence "Slappy" Thomas.
Sincerely,
Edward M. Kennedy
Watching Jerry Falwell and Larry Flynt debate on
Check out these verbatim quotes:
FALWELL: This man is a sleazebag, with all due respect.
(Hey, Dumbass! How do you respect a sleazebag?)
FLYNT: Gloria Steinem is a crazed feminist who represents
(Flynt sounds kind of like our lying whore, doesn't he?
FALWELL: Attacking a public figure is one thing,
(DUH!
---
Watching the Larry Flynt/Jerry Falwell debate brought us
TALE OF FOUR PUBLISHERS:
Larry Flynt - Hustler Magazine
Publishes outrageous crap, labeled "parody."
Rush Limba - The Rush Limba Program
Publishes outrageous crap, -half labeled as "parody," half labeled as
"truth"
Jerry Falwell - Wanna Buy a Tape?
Publishes outrageous crap, labeled "truth."
BartCop - Publisher RL-LNW
Publishes harmless fun, LABELED as harmless fun.
---
Falwell was polite to Larry Flint.
It was kinda strange...
Of course, as I watched, I was receiving
MAILBAG
From: porgygirl@fiber-net.com (Richard L. Alger)
Subject: WELCOME BACK NEWT
WOLF, HOESTETLER, MORELLA, NEUMAN, KLUG, FORBES, LEACH,
(The GOP has targeted nine Republicans for defeat?
It's early January, but we already have
"If Snoot's unpopularity is a drag on Conservativism,
--His Lardship, January 8, 1997
Great Republican Quotes
"Once you get rid of ethics,
--Snoot Gingrich
MAILBAG
From: "Jeffery Firkell" Subject: Your Idiocy
Dear Idiot:
(Jeff, you make a really awful first impression.)
As an avid listener to the Rush Limbaugh Radio Program,
(I'm a _wrong_ being? Did God screw up?)
From my brief readings of your crappy web page,
(I might not have super graphics and Java applets running
..it is quite apparent that a) you are stupid, and
(We covered that in your Greeting)
b) you have never listened to the Rush H. Limbaugh, III.
(What does the "H" stand for? Horseshit?
In proving my first point (labeled a, above),
(Why do you refer to it as "labeled a, above?"
I point to your insistance that Rush is a racist.
(Webster said it, not me.
In proving my second point (labeled b, above),
(There you go again - referring to the "thing labeled b."
I offer to your substandard intellijence,
(Isn't this guy the greatest?)
..that even liberals of the worst kind
(hyuk)
..that
(he means "who")
..listen to his show, wouldn't misrepresent Rush,
(OK, but if I admit I've never heard his show, you'll surely
More proof for my first point:
(More proof?
Since you do not listen to Rush's show, you are an idiot.
(Can't fight logic like that.)
Thank you for your time,
Jeffery Firkell
jf1jf@hotmail.com
(Jeff, don't be a stranger.)
Great Republican Quotes:
"It's the first time in 68 years that a Republican
--Snoot Gingrich
Hmmm, let's see.
Good God!
Buy Gold!
Buy Gold!
MAILBAG FEEDBACK
From: rwjulian@netusa1.net
Subject: Publication of a private letter
(Ed. Note: See Volume 80 - MAILBAG)
It appears that you do not believe that
Right off, I don't know how to take you.
I did NOT publicly attack you,
Duh! You had no forum from which to attack.
..although you clearly deserve it.
Ah... HERE we go!!
One wonders what kind of person would publish
a PRIVATE letter without permission,
No wonder you're upset.
..without notification,
So, if I'd told you 24 hours in advance that I was going to kick your
sorry ass,
..and without apology.
ha ha
You will please to make a public apology for this
gross act of discourtesy.
"Please to make an apology?"
My "gross act of discourtesy?"
I note that you published my EMail address,
yes, the address you sent
..which includes my real name,
I have no objection to that.
..without publishing your own.
Are you kidding? There's too many insane ax-killers on the Net.
Do you publish your name and address on your publications?
Hell, no! Are you crazy?
You have EVERY right to publish, but not private
letters.
Thank you for giving me permission to publish.
At least my attack was private.
Who GIVES a fuck?
I made no attempt to threaten or belittle you
in public.
I wish you would.
My letter was private. Many people get critical
letters,
Yeah, you scare me a lot.
Unlike your idol, I never publish the praise letters.
I could debate you, but that would be pointless.
You're right.
Your published attacks, at least that I have seen,
do not
You're BIG gripe is that I printed your critical letter.
It also requires an individual with ethical standards;
R.W. Julian
The newest beltway rumor is that if Clinton gets caught, he'll become
a Republican
MAILBAG
From: Senator@dpm.senate.gov
Subject: Re: RL-LNW Volume 82 Laugh a Little
Dear BartCop,
Thank you for contacting my office via the Internet.
Sincerely,
Daniel Patrick Moynihan
---
Poker at Al's
(Senator Al D'Amato regularly hosts a poker game
Limba: OK, it's my deal, this next game is low Chicago.
Quayle: Wow! Can you say "little spade?"
Limba: Why not? There's no reporters here. (Laughs)
Quayle: I don't get it.
Dornan: Can you believe those candy-ass Orange County voters?
D'Amato: Are you ever going to stop whining about that?
Buchanan: What do you call a Dallas Cowboy huddle?
A drug cartel.
What do you call a Dallas Cowboy in a suit?
The defendant.
Quayle: I don't get it.
Dornan: Hey, Limba, you gaining weight? You look fatter.
Limba: Yeah, I've been eating out a lot. I really need
D'Amato: Hey, Dornan. Is that true?
Dornan: Fuck you, D'Amato.
Buchanan: Rush, what happened to the Chocolate Chip?
Limba: Renquist made him stay after court and write
Limba: Who's hogging the potato chips?
Quayle: P, O, T... T...
Limba: WRONG!!
Quayle: Why is everybody laughing?
D'Amato: I've got a joke. Did you hear Jesse Jackson and
They're going to call it "We Be Toys."
Quayle: I don't get it.
Buchanan: I got a joke.
Knock Knock.
Quayle: Come in!
Limba: Danny, how can you be so stupid?
Let's just play cards, OK?
Quayle: No, wait. I want to hear the joke:
Buchanan: OK. Knock Knock!
Quayle: Come in!
All: (Laughs)
Did you see B-1 Bob Dornan on Politically Incorrect?
By the way, did you know B-1 Bob Dornan was an actor?
Dornan played a pilot in "The Starfighters" circa 1960.
If anyone knows more about this, contact me.
BartCop vs. G. Gordon Liddy
In 1993, Clinton was trying to sell his health care plan.
Clinton got the guy to admit he could give HC to all of his part-time
The Godfather CEO is black, hates Bill Clinton and thinks all this country
When Liddy introduced him, I warmed up my fax machine.
(From the tape)
Liddy: Here's a fellow who's upset with us both.
This is from BartCop in Tulsa.
>Mr. Liddy, what a Dog-and-Pony show you're giving us today!!
I'd like to answer this one myself.
So, .....I think it's wonderful to be called "another Clarence Thomas."
Great Rush Quotes
"That lying newspaper in Cedar Ridge, Iowa needs to
No fair Rush.
They say the upcoming Supreme Court decision on the right-to-die
Wow!
The Supremes have weighed in with profound concerns:
Chief Justice Renquist:
Justice Ginsburg:
Justice O'Connor:
Justice Souter:
Justice Kennedy:
Justice Breyer:
Justice Stevens:
Justice Scalia:
Justice Thomas:
Other Issues: [Index] -
[Prev]
Wait a couple of days and then write me back.
Don't write now. Give it a few days.
Wait for the Lord to prompt you before you write back.
The food was good, but there was no atmosphere.
are hosting a celebration of abortions. Tipper
Gore has agreed
to be the keynote speaker at this abortion celebration."
Veterans Day a celebration of war, starvation and mass murder?
but I recognize your talent of slurring the innocent.
your page almost makes me want to change sides.
Snoot, the President and Rush Limba have something in common.
to have dinner next week. He says they're going to smoke a few
cigars and talk about what a lying bastard Jim Leach is.
the President should also admit to
some stuff."
will be in our Next Issue.)
I look forward to hearing from you again.
He's really trying his best.
United States Senator
Larry King Friday was a HOOT!
nothing but a bunch of ugly, marching women.
but going after the wife and kids is a low blow.
Hey, low-blow Jerry!
The wife and kids are out-of-bounds?
Aren't you the cock-sucker who sells videotapes for $69
that claim that Hillary murdered 42 people?
And we HATE it when Rush calls Chelsea the White House dog.
Why do you think you mean-spirited assholes lost the election?)
some perspective to the RL-LNW newsletter.
Let's compare four political forces.
I thought he was a sport to even show up!
I got kind of a good vibe off Jerry Falwell this time.
He didn't seem as repulsive.
dittohead from a conservative crack whore...
SMITH, AND CAMPBELL WILL BE TARGETED FOR DEFEAT THE NEXT
TIME THEY RUN FOR OFFICE.
I think we can ditto that...
By the way, Richard. How'd you decide on "porgygirl?"
the True Rush Quote of the Year.
then maybe he should resign his Speakership!
And if Snoot's hurting the Republican Party,
then maybe
Clarence Thomas is hurting the GOP. Maybe
he should resign,
since he's considered a poor role model for
young black men.
And if Clarence Thomas is hurting the Republican
cause,
then maybe I'm hurting the Republican cause,
and maybe
America would be better off if the three of
us would
just slither away into the night. Back after
this..."
the rest is a piece of cake."
I must say that you are an incredible _wrong_ being.
around, but it's funny and Limba looks really stoopid.
God, I LOVE e-mail with numbers or letters.
Why bother to label it "a" if you have to refer to
the "thing labeled a" when referring to it?
QED.
And what the hell's the QED about?
Is that some secret code?
And why tell me that "b" is "above?
Would you write a reference LATER in the note?
therefore, it is obvious that you do not listen to his show.
admit that I'm the most accurate psychic in the world?)
You've shown proof?)
http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/1471
has won re-election to the Speakership of the House."
Sixty-eight years ago was 1928... and America was in
it's greatest expansion period ever until...
The Republicans crashed the Stock market!!!
private communications should remain private.
You could be a normal Joe who MIGHT deserve an apology.
To be honest, the "ethics" of sharing mail hasn't come up.
But more likely, you're a Rush-sheep with ditt-for-brains.
Plus, you called me a "fascist."
As my reply clearly stated, since I'm a liberal, how could I be a fascist?
Fascists SUPPRESS liberals. Next year, ask Santa for a dictionary.
Giving me MORE reason to help your clumsy ass stay hidden,
saying I "clearly" deserve a PUBLIC attack.
Christ, boy! Can you even SEE stupid from where you are?
Was your post written by Pee Wee Herman?
I own my mail. You own yours.
If you had some e-mail of ME saying something that stupid, I'd expect
you to show your friends.
If you're that ashamed of what you wrote, maybe YOU should write an
apology?
you'd feel better about getting slapped in front of up to 46,000,000
witnesses?
An apology?
An APOLOGY???!!!???
What are the odds in Vegas of BartCop apologizing to some boneheaded
sheep
for pointing out the holes in the lies on which his boneheaded sheepism
is based?
Are we from Japan?
Jeez, you're funnier than I wish I was.
I'd never want MY real name used!!
Do you know what kind of wackos are on-line?
You gotta be a REAL idiot to use your real name here.
When I took the vow to never betray you...(cough)
I never anticipated this set of circumstances.
You act like it's your first week on AOL.
If you can't stand the heat in the kitchen,
go play with the kids in the backyard.
Christ, you're setting a new record for sniveling.
It just shows you're AFRAID.
You're confusing fear with discretion.
but do not publish them. Are you terrified of
criticism?
I know you're a newbie and all, but if you read my work,
you'll see I publish ONLY letters from disgruntled sheep.
My "you're the greatest" mail outruns the hate mail 5-1.
I only publish the funny stuff I get from ditto-sheep.
Then ewe accuse me of being "terrified of criticism?"
It would be.
contain any semblance of fair argument.
You're SECOND biggest gripe is that I'm not fair.
I see none here.
And don't you EVER print my name and e-mail address
again!!!
Scared as a bunny,
rwjulian@netusa1.net
and use the "slap-on-the-wrist" penalty that Snoot has invented.
I always look forward to hearing from you.
By the way, I LOVE the "Poker at Al's" bit.
United States Senator
with GOP fat-cats and ADM bribe-wranglers.)
Whoever has the little spade gets half the pot?
to lose some weight. My body is very soft.
I'll kick your Italian ass, mob connection or not.
"I will not cheat off Antonin" 1000 times.
Louis Farrakhan are opening a toy store in Oakland?
Paul Rodriquez took him on a non-stop 30-minute slapjob for his views
on immigration.
Dornan, I thought, handled himself like a nice, young gentleman.
Whenever Dornan behaves himself, we should encourage him.
This is true.
I didn't find it in a movie database, but I've seen it.
Nightline showed clips when they profiled him.
He did several town hall shows where people asked questions.
In Kansas City, a black guy said he was president of Godfather
Pizza, and Clinton's HC proposal might bankrupt him.
and full-time employees if he raised the price of his pizza by 25 cents.
needs is a huge tax cut for the super-rich. So, he went to the top
of the GOP
"one-of-the-good-ones" list and started the rounds on the wacko-talk
show circuit.
You know, Liddy might be a right-wing, partisan nut, but he's
brave enough to let liberals have their say, so I had mine:
>The ONLY reason you're having this man on, is because of his grandstanding
>during Clinton's Kansas City town hall meeting in 1993. The ONLY reason
he's
>being asked to testify before a Republican congress is because he's
a black man
>willing to attack the president. The GOP wants to show there's at
least one other
>Clarence Thomas in America.
If I were being compared to Clarence Thomas, I would consider that......
to be wonderful.
I happen to think that Clarence Thomas is somebody who, in his area,
did what you did,
which is come from the bottom and go all the way to the top, and for
a lawyer, you can't
go any farther than the Supreme Court.
remember one thing: I'm bigger than they are."
You're bigger than the midwest.
controversy will be the biggest issue for the baby boomers.
Some people say it'll make the fight over abortion look like a picnic.
The factions will fight it out in every legislature.
Is this a proper question for the courts?
We're dealing with so many millions of lives.
Timing will be a big factor in our decision.
This is about how we allocate our resources.
Currently, twenty five percent of Americans die in pain.
Has a doctor ever been convicted of assisting a death?
Why can't we simply determine, as a society, it's wrong?
A-CHOO!!!