"I am an Abortionist."
Dr. Tom Coburn (R-Jesus Twin) Forced
to Confess
You can't tell it from the headline, because the ditto-monkey
Tulsa World
will do anything to protect the right-wing hypocrites
from their past deeds.
The headline, buried inside the nobody-reads-Saturday edition
on Page 9, read
"Coburn, abortion rights group clash over RU-486 rules."
But hidden deep inside the story is Dr. Coburn's murderous
confession:
Coburn admitted performed abortions.
"While it's true that on two occasions
I have performed abortions,
it is ludicrous to suggest that
I was an abortionist," he weaseled.
So, is Dr. Coburn an abortionist?
I guess it depends on what the definition of the word "is," is.
Just like with Bob Barr, we find the most critical, headline-grabbing
scumbags
are actually guilty of that which they condemn when the
cameras are rolling.
Barr told Larry King, "Of course I wrote the check to have
my daughter murdered.
You see, my wife and I share a checking account," as though their
little baby
in Heaven would understand Georgia's complex banking legalilities.
Unlike scumbag Barr, Dr. Coburn actually pulled the
trigger on those poor babies.
The former (?) Jesus Twin (Can he use Christ's name in
his title after admitting
to murdering two defenseless babies?) said the abortion-rights
group had "no business"
revealing to the world that he, Rep. Dr. Tom Coburn, was a murdering
scumbag.
The Rev. Linda Morgan Clark, executive director of the
Oklahoma Religious Coalition
for Reproductive Choice accused the murdering
scumbag of grandstanding on the issue to get more face-time in
front of a camera.
"As a physician himself, Coburn should have more trust in physicians'
ability to practice
medicine safely, without heavy-handed government supervision,"
Clark said.
"Coburn might have a different response to RU-486 if he listened
to women at home
rather than grandstanding to legislators in Washington," said
Clark.
Coburn's response was, "It's not fair to focus on the babies I've killed."
Coburn went on to say that Clinton couldn't be trusted because
he mislead us
about his private affair with Monica Lewsinsky where nobody was
murdered.
My eyes must be playing tricks on me.
I gotta be reading this wrong.
Not only is Paula Jones spreading her legs for Penthouse again,
but this time her pictures are accompanied by a Joe Conason story?
"How the Far Right used and abused her to destroy Clinton."
Click Here and tell me if my eyes are lying.
ha ha
This is too good.
Not as good as Laura the Martyr getting caught with her
pants down,
but it's still too good.
Sports Action
Today's "big football shootout" between Oklahoma and Texas turned
ugly when
the Texas mascot, "Big Bevo," went wild from mad cow disease
and injured six.
Texas wishes that had been the extent of the damage as
Air Oklahoma rolled to
a 42-7 lead, and that was just in the first half.
Last time I checked, Oklahoma was up 84-7
in the fourth quarter.
Things were going so bad for UT, ABC switched to the Michigan
game, something
that's never happened in the 210-year history of the "Red River
Rivalry."
Tenth-ranked-and-climbing Oklahoma's quarterback, Josh the Hoople,
is expected
to be tapped by Democrats to run against Uncle OJ Watts just
5 weeks before the election.
Hoople is expected to win easily. Football trumps racism in Oklahoma
- Uncle OJ Watts
could marry any white girl he wants in Oklahoma, from one of
the white bitches he
knocked up as a pampered athlete all the way to Gov. Keating's
daughter.
But Hoople is white, and a white, current football hero beats
a black has-been all day.
Texans Republicans fear this is a signal from God, a harbinger
of further doom that's coming.
Looking for a silver lining, one Texas fan was heard to say,
"Thank God it wasn't Tennessee."
That game is scheduled for November 7th.
Chop This
In baseball news, the St Louis Cardinals,
the official bartcop.com baseball team
even after having "Pigboy appreciation Day" earlier
in the year, opened up a jumbo-sized
can of whopp-ass on the error-prone Atlanta Braves, out-scoring
them 13-1 to advance
to the second round of the baseball playoffs.
The Cardinals are so deep with talent, they have players on
the fucking bench
who've hit seventy home runs in a single season.
On a serious note, Atlanta's Chipper Jones was hospitalized after the game.
Jones, as you may have heard, was charged with several costly
errors in the last four games,
including the easy grounder that cost Atlanta their home field
advantage. Police sources
speaking on the condition of anoniminity said Jones was so despondent
immediately after
the game, he was the victim of a failed suicide attempt, but
luckily, Jones fumbled the gun
at the crucial moment, escaping with the bullet just grazing
the side of his head.
Police cordoned off a section of Atlanta's Methodist Hospital
for Jones's wives and
children to be near the third baseman when he is able to accept
visitors.
Today's Page Two Girl is Valerie Eden.
Sheriff Stanley Glanz, whose deputies patrolled Saturday's rally,
said,
"That's not his name. We know who he really is."
"Justice Thompson" identified himself as "Mr. Sportage" in a document
he submitted
to the Sheriff's Office about the rally, Haralson said. Both
names are among the 16
aliases the 49-year-old rural Osage County man is known to use.
"I set to work at finding out everything I could about this guy,"
he said.
"He's the head honcho for the American Knights (of the KKK) in
Oklahoma."
Haralson pulled from his desk a photo of a house near Tulsa that
had a
Confederate flag out front and said, "That's where he lives."
The residence was the site of a post-rally party.
The man moved to the area about seven years ago when he was released
from
federal prison, where he reportedly served time for drug-related
charges, Haralson said.
"Know Your News" Pop Quiz
Are the people seen below:
1. Supporters of George W Bush and the Republican party?
2. Supporters of George W Bush and state's rights?
3. Supporters of George W Bush and the Slaver flag?
4. Supporters of George W Bush, the Klan, Aryan Resistance and
white-power?
5. Supporters of George W Bush and killing "nigger boys."
6. All of the above
This ad paid for by Harkin Oil Company, the Wylie
Brothers, Enron Oil,
Haley Barbor, and Texan's for Keeping Houston's
Air Clean and White.
Another tape-measure home run from Betty Bowers
Click Here for her most-perfect version.
Click Here for the lesser, forever version.
Glavin hummms "Happy Trails To You"
From: mccool.13@osu.edu
From AP via the Zoltmeter:
"I'm absolutely shocked and dismayed that
these sort of allegations would
come up," said Rep. Bob Barr, the foundation's
president from 1990 to 1994
[who was obviously caught with his pants
down--again].
"It's just terribly distressing. If this
took place, as I've seen it reported
in the paper, the conduct itself is absolutely
shocking."
[Note to Woodward & Bernstein: this
is a Category 1 non-denial denial.]
Oh, Barr-f! These self-loathing lying-in-wait
preverts need to be exposed at
every opportunity. That is, when they are
not exposing themselves. From J.
Edgar to Roy Cohn to this latest Barr Buddy,
all we ever get from these
cowards is a steady ejaculation of purient
slime.
And this Glavin guy gives new meaning to the phrase "copping a feel..."
So, here they are again, selling Bibles
and Rightgeousness, wagging their
dick-tongues at our randy-but-ever-popular
(not to mention straight)
president, ranting about a Higher Authority,
the also-ran Rule of Law, and
the threat of pinko com-symps to the American
way of life --all the while
passing around J. Edgar's make-up case
among themselves.
Richard
The AP has picked up this story from yesterday's bartcop.com
Gore Must Go Negative to Win, Yet he Can't
Morgan Fairchild says...
Get a leg up...
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