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I'm Confused
Why is everyone so excited about the chance that the Senate might become 51-49?
We lost the tax cut swindle vote 62-38.
That means if Jeffords comes over, and if he votes like
a Democrat (that's a big "if")
then we'll lose the next vote 61-39.
Whoop-dee-doo!
We're still going to lose every vote and Smirk will still
win every white-power appointment
because the fake Democrats are trying so hard to be friends
with Weak & Stupid.
We're still twelve Democratic spines away from having any Democratic
power.
Until the pink tutu Democrats start acting like men, we're still
screwed.
Miller, Breaux, Torricelli, those Dakota traitors and the others
aren't going to help.
Hey, God, why you doing this to us?
We didn't call you a son of a bitch.
We didn't call you feckless.
We didn't tell you to go hang yourself, and still
- you put the Smirk plague on us.
Today in History
In 1990: Kneel Bush, son of President George Herbert-Herbert Bush,
denied any wrongdoing in the
millions of dollars missing from Silverado savings-and-loan in
Denver, while testifying before Congress.
Since the stolen $60,000,000 had nothing to do with Clinton's
cock,
the Senate said, "Thanks for testifying,
Kneel," and dropped the matter.
Talk to Ann Coulter
From: chrisotto@stockamerica.com
Hey BC --
I noticed on the program notes for our state public
radio's "information" network that La Skank
will be on at 5 pm central time today, Wednesday
5/23. This broadcast (like all their programming,
both classical & informational) is available
on the web, and callers can reach them toll-free.
(I don't have the number handy, I'd suggest checking
in for a few minutes in the second half of the
4-5PM show to get the correct number, phoning
during the top-of-the-hour NPR newscast to get in line,
then waiting on hold until they accept calls.
That usually starts about 15-20 min into the show.
See the announcement of the Coulter show at
http://www.wpr.org/ideas/notes/in010523.htm
listen online at http://www.wpr.org/ideas-live.ram
.
Unfortunately WPR doesn't archive old shows on
line like NPR does.
The host, Kathy Dunn, is not a ditto-monkey. She's
no flaming liberal either, though the local AM hate radio
crowd thinks she is. She'll be gentle with Ann.
I predict the callers will be very tough on Ann -- right-wingers
don't get an easy ride from WPR listeners as
a rule.
If you can spare the time, have fun...
A free car to whoever gets on the air and asks Coulter how her self-esteem
got so low that she'd agree to perform Monica on a plastic clown.
Must have recording of call to claim car.
Question: How is Netscape Composer similar to The Weakest Link?
Answer: Unless you "bank" every 30 seconds - you lose everything.
More Lies
from Maureen Dowd
(She hates
everybody)
Excerpt:
[Hillary Clinton] backed up a truck to
the White House
to haul away appurtenances to furnish
her two mansions...
Mo, you ignorant slut.
You were silent when Red-Ink Reagan left with millions.
He got his free mansion and millions in kickbacks from
Japan
because he was the best president Japan ever bought.
You were silent when Bush left with his millions from the
Moonie Empire,
and the millions more he's made from his Kuwait "private businesses."
But the Clintons, who came to Washington BROKE and left millions
in debt are an easy target,
and brain-dead whores like yourself are too lazy to investigate
a story, so you take the cheap shot, instead
Reagan/Bush gave us war and recession.
Clinton gave us this:
...and the press nailed him to the cross for his eight years of 80-hour work weeks.
Only a whore outfit like the NYW Times would employ a lazy bitch like you, Maureen.
You can kiss my ass, Maureen Dowd.
Police seek Blake tapes on abortion
LOS ANGELES (AP) - A newspaper has agreed to give
police tape recordings that depict Robert Blake
pressuring Bonny Lee Bakley to get an abortion.
According to tapes published in the National Enquirer,
Blake also accused his future wife of trapping
him into marriage by lying about using birth control.
Detectives investigating the May 4 shooting death
of Bakley were interviewing one of her relatives when they
learned of tapes and documents the family had
given to the Enquirer, LA police Lt. Horace Frank said.
Blake's lawyer, Harland Braun, said the tapes
"are consistent with what they were talking about at the time,"
but added that they don't mean Blake killed her.
"He has a motive, but so do a lot of other people," Braun said.
How stupid for Blake's attorney to say that.
I would've fired his ass on the spot if he "represented" me that way.
"Robert told me, 'As long as the police don't
try to fabricate evidence,
I have nothing to worry about,'" Braun
said.
Trust me - that means when evidence against Blake surfaces, he'll say,
"I told you they might fabricate evidence
against me."
It's an old Pigboy trick.
Predict the obvious, then claim "special powers" when it happens.
Steve Coz, the Enquirer's editor-in-chief, said he did not pay for the
tapes.
Coz said Bakley made the tapes of her phone calls last year.
"You lied to me, you double-crossed me, and
that's who you are," the Enquirer quotes Blake.
Bakley replied: "All I wanted is to be with you. I didn't know there was anything wrong."
Happy Birthday, Joan Collins
and Jewel
Hey there, friend of Soft Skull
One of my fave indie publishers, Soft Skull, has
issued this call to the people to help get the truth out about the new
edition of Fortunate
Son: George W. Bush and the Making of an American President.
Sander Hicks at Soft Skull just wrote me and
said,
We are reprinting Fortunate Son right now and
getting it back into stores by June 15. This title has been legally
suppressed and the mainstream media have misrepresented
the story. It's an important, truthful book and we need
your help to spread the word. Take a look at
the Publisher's Preface I wrote for the new Fortunate Son, the new
13 page political cartoon by radical artist Seth
Tobocman, and the new Foreword by NYU's Mark Crispin Miller.
All up at http://www.softskull.com/html/fortunate_son.html.
We are offering friends of ours open access to
the Seth Tobocman cartoon.
.....
(Note:
this is a good series of toons - check it out at www.softskull.com)
We got sued, we got slandered, the mainstream
media screwed us to the wall, but we're back.
We're here to tell the truth about the President.
Sander Hicks
CEO
Soft Skull Press
http://www.softskull.com
More on Bartlet's Latin ranting at God
Click Here for NPR's audio (very short) of the rant with explantion.
Question: Why doesn't Bartlet have faith in his God?
If I was a believer, I'd have faith.
Bartlet knows conversational Latin, which probably takes a decade
to learn,
and his faith is shaken that easily?
You don't need faith to go to a ball game or cut the lawn or watch
TV.
You need faith when a loved one dies, so why did Bartlet lose
his faith so quickly?
Like Father Damien in The Exorcist,
Bartlet's faith went out the window at the first hint
of trouble.
Sure, he got in back before the show was over, but that was after
he called God an SOB,
"a feckless thug," and then told God to "go hang yourself."
Sidebar:
I had to look up "feckless." It's not a
word you hear a lot.
It means WEAK, INEFFECTIVE WORTHLESS, IRRESPONSIBLE
Sounds like our current Failure in Thief.
Don't get me wrong, it was riviting TV, but religious people confuse
me.
They insist on this charade, while others are watching
them.
But when their faith is tested, they almost always crumble immediately.
If it means so little to them, why do they bother?
From: (withheld)
Subject: Original Ray's Pizza in New York
BC,
You wrote:
> This 11th at 6th Ray's has signs saying,
>"We are not affilaited with any other Ray's Restaurant.
>We are the only original Ray's."
This is important. There was this "pizza
war" in NYC about 20 years ago.
Every other pizzeria in town was calling itself
"Ray's", because this 11th and 6th Ray's had really great pizza.
Then they all got to arguing over who was the
REAL ORIGINAL RAY'S. The New York Times had
this rolling-on-the-floor-laughing article about
it. Their reporter went around town, interviewing pizza men,
asking if they were the REAL ORIGINAL RAY'S.
One baker explained that his store was the REAL
ORIGINAL RAY'S, because they were the only pizzeria
that actually had someone named Ray working there.
The reporter asked if he could speak to Ray.
"Sure", said the baker. "Hey Ralph!
Get over here!"
Vengeful
bastards go after Clinton's little brother
Roger Clinton hires Susan McDougal's
lawyer
Excerpt:
Cops claim: We didn't know
we were arresting Clinton's borother...
The tape:
Officer 2: "Does he have Secret Service protection?"
Officer 1: "Not really, but his brother did."
We have lying cops!
This is one reason cops don't get the respect fire fighters do.
Firemen don't stay up late at night figuring out how to screw
somebody.
Letter to the New York Post
Our mayor is a Catholic?
And he brings his goomah to his house?
...even Tony Soprano isn't that insensitive.
California
Reamin'
by Greg Palast, overseas, of course.
You can tell he's not in the states,
because he's not fawning over President
Weak & Stupid.
he dares to have an opinion not approved by Uncle Dick.
Excerpt:
You nasty-minded readers probably believe
George Bush's energy plan is just
some pea-brained scheme to pay off the
president's oil company buddies, fry the
planet, and smother Mother Earth in coal
ash, petroleum pollutants and nuclear waste.
If that's what you think, you've overlooked
the vicious intent of the whole programme.
It's payback time - and Bush intends to
make California pay.
...and the American whore press keeps running story after story
about how holy Smirk is,
and how Biblical Smirk is, and what a devout and
humble son of a bitch he is.
Well, fellas, you only got the end of that right.
From: lgrove@snowcrest.net
Subject: West Wing final episode
Well, by now I'm sure you've got your tape of
the final show and it will be a little different than your recollection.
He actually asked the shrew he called on to repeat
the question ("will you run again?")--this, AFTER staring at,
then ignoring the guy ready to throw him
a cream puff. The suspense builds and builds and then, and then the
President slides his hands off the podium and
plunges them deep into his pockets.
We KNOW he's gonna say to the bitch, "Hell yes!,
I'm gonna run.
I can't let a little illness allow the whore
Republicans to take control.
Roosevelt lied about his polio, Eisenhower about
his heart attacks, Kennedy lied
about his Addison's disease, Nixon about his
alcoholism, and Reagan about his brain death.
Of course I lied. BFD!"
There's no suspense here, no cliff hanger. The
excitement stems from where the show will go next season.
Will the Repuglies appoint Ken Starr to be the
special prosecutor?
Yes.
Will he act like a partisan, lying, corrupt fanatic?
Yes.
Will next season be a mirror of White Water?
Yes.
And Americans who watch will finally get a look
at the Republican m.o.
that the whore media did not show.
Lastly, I heard an NPR interview with a scholar
who gave a different interpretation
of the Latin in the final episode. Is there
an official "West Wing" site to check this out?
Thanks for your hard work,
Lewis Grove
a sort of weasel
The triumph
of "multicultural" thugs
The physical assault on Ann Coulter at Cornell proves that fascism
is alive and well on U.S. campuses.
by David Horowitz (R-Sane Like Klayman)
Ok, back to New York
It's still Saturday afternoon, and I'm behind, so I'll critique less art this issue.
I'd just picked up the Japanese art I had commissioned, and we
continued walking.
That's a busy-ass part of town, 53 Street and Fifth Avenue...
Next up was St Patrick's Cathedral, where America has said a lot
of sad goodbyes.
Helluva building, so to speak.
The doors were open, we went in. The doors must weigh 400
pounds each.
I had to lineback the door to make it move.
There was a mass going on.
The smell of hundreds of candles hasn't hit my nose in
decades.
They do that, they use that aroma therapy to dull your
senses.
Even yearlings file that smell, so as to trigger the shame
and self-doubt later.
At twenty months, that organ music sets the tone, too.
The frankencense, the hushed and reverent tones, the slamming
of the kneelers...
...it formats the brain for dependence on the ghosts with the losing percentage.
Sorry, now isn't the time...
On the other side of the street was NBC and Rockefeller
Center.
We looked at the Cheers t-shirts and the Friends
coffee mugs...
You can buy ER scrubs, if you're into buying silly
stuff.
It got boring real quick, but at least it was a rest from the
walking.
Continuing on, Mrs. BartCop spotted a street vendor with $5 jewelry.
She bought so much stuff we had to make a run back to the hotel
to dump it all.
My knees were hurting big time by then.
Remember the toe
I broke last year?
New York reminded me of that night, a little more than once per
second..
But - the Lord provides!
Mrs. BartCop gave me a Vioxx, and I was Jesse Owens.
We called CAL and Ray from the hotel and said, "Let's go walking!"
We took a subway to Manhattan's foot.
From there, the four of us walked to Battery Park.
Nice place ...clean, ...intact, ...grass was cut, and it
was right on the water.
- remember what they said about Mussolini?
This park ran on-time!
Walking, telling stories, telling lies and laughing, and the weather was perfect.
Here's a boat, shot from the Esplanade
A shot of the sun starting to set.
Being "arty" with my camcorder
We walked so far south and then so far west, I glanced back east.
Tall buildings
A Smirk tax cut means another boat for
the rich
This is the water entrance
to the World Trade Center
Close-up of a tall building
Oh, it's the World trade Centers!
Let's go up to the top floor and have a drink.
Everybody excited?
It was 7:45
Just like the Rio, they closed so the tile people could come
in.
We did a SnackDown at the Krispy Kreme.
Ray'd never been to one before.
I suggested the raspberry tart.
(Picture not available.)
Back on the streets...
My dawgs was starting to bark again, but there were more
sites to see.
It was fully dark now, and we were wandering the streets of lower
Manhattan.
Not sure, but that's a cool shot
Looks like a movie poster, doesn't it?
I think Zore the Gatekeeper lives there.
Then, a sad note.
The grave of Alexander Hamilton
It makes sense that he's buried here:
Sidebar:
See how much faster we're moving?
I did some cypherin' and figured out if it took
me two days to explain each day,
it's be a long time before we got back
to smackin' Smirk, and I'm ready!)
From the NYSE, we walked to Staten Island.
Damn, that's a long way.
Lucky, we had a ferry.
NY skyline from the Staten Island Ferry
This brought a tear to my eye.
It reminded me of the old days,
when we chose our president by a citizen vote.
Back on the mainland, after 10 PM, back to the subway.
Look how clean the subway is on a Saturday night.
You know who we have to give some credit to?
...and they say fascism isn't a viable system?
We got off the subway near Ray's Original Pizza at 11th
Street and 6th Avenue.
They say this is the best of the Ray's Pizza's, which is New
York Pizza.
This 11th at 6th Ray's has signs saying,
"We are not affiliated with any other
Ray's Restaurant.
We are the only original
Ray's."
Damn, that's some fine pizza.
More on that in the big Thursday issue.
After pizza, we walked over to Washington Square Park.
Guess what?
As we stepped foot into the park, a NY cop was proclaiming:
"This park is closed, you must exit
the park immediately!"
...New York, ...Las Vegas, ...they close when they see BartCop coming.
We took a cab back to the hotel, where a Van Gogh print hung on the walls.
...end of New York Part III.
Tomorrow is the Empire State Building, Times Square, Grand Central
Station,
CAL and Ray, Brooklyn, Mexican food, The Sopranos, Super
Brownies and more.
Click Here to get new BartCop Stuff.
About.com is doing some award thing, "The Bushies."
They're letting people cast ballots for their favorite websites.
For Excellence in Bush-Whacking,
Best Parody Site,
Best Parody Picture,
Best Web Graphics and Toons (...a hot race between Chadsux
and PoliticalStrikes (Cunningham)
They have Ol' BartCop with a tough group of nominees.
Best Bush Watchdog
Vote for outstanding achievement in monitoring, resisting and burning Bush
American Politics Journal
Bush Watch
BuzzFlash
Democrats.com
George W. Bush Scorecard of Evil
The Smirking Chimp
BartCop
Damn, those are the major league boys.
I'll tell you one thing - I'm the David in this group of Goliath's.
But where is OnlineJournal.com?
Where is MediaWhoresOnline.com?
Where is the Diva?
Personally, I think it'd be tacky to pull a Kathy Lee Gifford
and ask people to GO
HERE
and vote for bartcop.com to get some quick recognition,
perhaps in USA TODAY.
As I write this, (1:20 EST) bartcop.com is dead
last in the polling.
bartcop.com is the least outstanding site
at resisting Smirk's illegal takeover?
Is that right?
So, remember, I'm asking people not to GO HERE and vote for bartcop.com because that'd be tacky.
The
Arkansas Project wasn't journalism
by my good friend Joe Conason
Excerpt:
Ted Olson's defenders say the Clinton-bashing
effort was protected by the
First Amendment -- and besides, Olson
didn't know much about it anyway.
They're wrong on both counts.
Good stuff, Joe!
Great toon, by David Horsey, Seattle Post Intelligencer
The Sports Page is doing good, looks like.
Bad timing, it birthed just as we were leaving town, but
it has good stuff,
and we still need writers!
Don't you write a little?
Don't you have an opinion?
I'll bet you do on game day, so why not now?
If you ever wanted your opinion to count, get involved.
Go to the sports page and e-mail Angryburgher with a sports
rant
that someone might mention to someone at the water cooler tomoro.
Pretty soon, after a coupla weeks, a dozen people might
talk about your column.
After a year, you'll have a hundred regular readers.
By 2005, you've have 10,000 readers a day.
Don't you want your opinion to count?
Keep in mind - we can't do politics 24/7.
If we fight the fight constantly, we'll burn out and they'll
win.
Sports is therapy!
It'll make us sharper for the Big Battle.
Check into the sports page - contribute.
The
JFK Conspiracy Page has some new stuff up,
including
a user-friendly "Give us your opinion," section.
Have an opinion?
Why not share it, ...unless it's just nonsense.
You can create an identity at yahoo.com or hotmail.com
or countless others
if you want to contribute anonymously.
Get involved, speak your mind.
If someone else has put forth your ideas, that's cool.
But if you're thinking something that nobody else is saying, and
you think it's the truth,
and you can state your reasons, send Bojan an e-mail and tell
us.
...or,
...you could just keep quiet.
I forget...
Is it illegitimate president or bastard president?
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2001,
bartcop.com
Thanks for the
fumble, Dude.
