051602ditto

Subject: You need to know who I am!

BartCop:

I'm a Patriotic Real American - I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family,
not some Washington bureaucrat with a fat pension and no responsibility beyond taking
my money and giving it to crack addicts squirting out babies and future criminals.

Whoa, you must be one of those bad first-impression guys.

You believe your money belongs to you?
Does that mean you refuse to support the defense of this country?
Or do you know another method, besides taxes, of supporting the military?

I don't buy the candyass whimpering of you, diehard, Rochester Jim,
Isaac the Pansy, Gene Lyons the Commie, and your other subversive point guards.

You have failed to define "candyass wimpering," my friend.
So far, you have been rude, crude and non-specific.
I'll bet you voted for Bush.

...and Isaac the Pansy hasn't written anything in months, so you
must be a longtime reader. Thanks for making the hammer higher.

Yes, I am a real Patriotic American. This pretty much sums it up for me.
I like big trucks, SUVs, big boats, big houses, big guns and naturally, pretty women.

Oh, you're not gay?

I don't care about appearing compassionate.

Did I ask you to appear compassionate?

I help people and donate heavily to good charities that help people and I don't need
to be complimented for being compassionate. Don't bother me.

ha ha

Don't bother you?
I never f-ing heard of you until you wrote with the grandios headline You need to know who I am
and you're telling me not to bother you? I think you have some problems to work on, Bill.

You wimps donate to JulieFest harboring an anorexic liar and coverup artist.

Juliefest did not harbor an anorexic liar and coverup artist.
You obviously don't know Julie's story, yet you have strong opinions about it.
That leads me to believe you're a non-thinking ditto-monkey.

Why would a woman lie to lose her home when she could just tell the truth and keep it?
Why would a wealthy woman sacrifice her home and all her money to help a Democrat
when she was a non-involved Republican at the time?

So what does that make you?

It makes me Tequilaboy, with a comedy page on the internet.
Thanks for providing my readers with some laughs.

Not squat you pussy with a jockstrap. Diehard has twice the balls you do.

There you go again, substituting name-calling for rational thought.
What year did you graduate from the Excellence in Broadcasting Academy?
Any chance you could act like an adult instead of a kid who needs a nap?

I think playing with toy guns doesn't make you a killer.
I believe ignoring your kids and giving them Ritalin and Prozac might.
Sending them to public schools that don't care if they speak proper English
or a foreign language is hateful to me and mean-spirited.
Ebonics is hate-speech for kids who want to have a future.
It is bad English and a stupid sounding language to other English-speaking people.

ha ha
You have a problem with everything...
When was the last time you enjoyed yourself?

I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized. I have the right not to be tolerant
of others because they are different, weird or make me mad. So do they. So do you.

Yes, that's what makes America great - the fact that you can ooze hate all day long.
Tell me you don't have children.
Tell me you're not passing this hate onto kids who will grow up to be just like you.

You can even hate Tiger Woods and Clarence Thomas like you do.
You can hate Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity, too, like you do.
Even ill (Independent) O'Reilly, like you do.
Hell, you mostly hate people, don't you and your band of blundering bozos.

ha ha

This is my life to live, and not necessarily up to others' opinions and expectations.
I don't care what you think, but I do care if you interfere in my life and you'll hit
the deck if you try, you blundering clown with a face like a bloodhound.

You see?
You're so angry with life I'm surprised you haven't already killed yourself.
You say I have the face of a bloodhound? Where did we meet?
It could only have been at Juliefest2002-DC, but you say you weren't there,
so it must be more unfocused hate from a kid who grew up without hugs.

I know what SEX is and there are not varying degrees of it.

Bill, you're doing it all wrong.
You're supposed to do it with another person!

It is a stupid ex-president who doesn't know what SEX is.
That's his problem. Probably got it from his Lesbian wife.

Bill, you're an angry man who lives and breathes hatred for American.
Have you ever been a member of Al Qaeda?

I believe in marriage between a man and a woman. That's a definition.
There is no such thing as a marriage between two men. Or two women.
Or two bananas. Or two cats. Or two gerbils. Or five elephants. Etc.

How about two mindless ditto-monkeys? Should they be allowed to marry?
Why business is it of yopurs if two women want to cuddle at night?
Don't you believe in freedom, Bill?
Is that why you hate America? Because we have too much freedom?

Have you ever practiced your freedom to shut up?

I don't celebrate Kwanzaa. But if you want to that's fine; I just don't feel
like everyone else should have to.

But wait - if your neighbor's sex life is your concern, why not his holidays, too?
If your neighbor needs your permission to have sex, why do you allow him the freedom
to celebrate a holiday you don't approve of? Can you explain yourself?

Don't teach my kids Islam in public school unless you teach them about all other
major religions of the USA and the world. And tell the truth not your version of of it.

Oh, so you want the true religion taught, and not the false one.
Perfect - I think they do the same thing in Saudi Arabia, Iran, Iraq, Syria and Lebanon.
Why do you want to trade America's freedom of religion into another Saudi Arabia?
Do you make your wife wear a burka?
You sure sound Al Qaeda to me.

I agree, Bart.
This guy's Al Qaeda, I can smell it on him.
When my new torture complex is complete,
we'll find out what this Bill fella is hiding.

I believe that if you are selling me a Dairy Queen milkshake, a pack of cigarettes, or a hotel room
you do it in English. As of matter of fact, if you are an American citizen you should speak English.
My uncles and forefathers shouldn't have had to die in vain so you can leave the countries you were
born in to come here and disrespect ours, and make us bend to your will.

You poor bastard, is that was this is about?
Some foreigners have been making you bend?
Have you called the police about it?
By the way, those Dairy Queen milkshakes aren't real milk shakes.
They are a cold, psuedo-dairy confection.

Yes, English was decided many years ago as the official language of the USA.
German came in second in an actual vote and lost by one vote.
Let's not do it again or we may soon all be speaking Spanish.

So, after we murdered the Native Americans and stole their land we should all agree
to speak the foreign language that most early invaders use, which was English?

Get over it, BartCop. You are a wimp and a jerk.

You have clearly established your bona fides as a conservative Republican.

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry butt if you're running from them
after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word 'freeze' or 'stop' in English,
see the previous paragraphs.

After seeing the Rodney King tape, I understood why black kids run from cops.

I don't use the excuse "it's for the children" as a shield for unpopular opinions or actions,
or to bully legislators to vote for horsecrap legislation that is really NOT for the children.

You are correct. Your unelected president does that, not you.

I don't believe in people who go to states they never lived in to take
a political position that belonged to someone from that state.

But you'll still vote for Liddy Dole in North Carolina, right?

I know how to count votes and I feel much safer letting a machine with no political affiliation
do a recount when needed. There is no such thing as a dimpled chad. Only assholes and idiots
buy that argument, actually only liars believe in that ludicrous possibility. You either follow the
voting instructions or kiss off!

ha ha

Which guy is Bill Adams?

They were easy and anyone who can read English can figure it out.
The instructions say to remove all chads from the ballot before turning it in.
If you don't do this and your vote is tossed out, it is YOUR fault, not the voting machine.

Is that why thousands of retired Florida Jews voted for Buchanan?

I know what the definition of lying is, and it isn't based on the word "is" -ever.

I know lying when I hear it:
"I am not a crook."
"There were no weapons on those two small plans to Iran."
"I was out of the loop during Iran-Contra."
"Read my lips - no new taxes."
"I will bring honor and dignitude to the White House."

That is the domain of a rotten president who did nothing, said nothing, and accomplished nothing.

So, peace and prosperity count for nothing?
Must be part of your "I hate America" campaign.

What else could the dumbshit do? He didn't even know what the meaning of 'is' is.

That reminds me of "Is our children learning?"
You know who said that?

What a farthead -- by the way that is an airhead that stinks!

Classy comment from a classy guy.

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you qualify for any special loan programs,
government sponsored bank loans, etc., so you can open a hotel, 7-Eleven, trinket shop, or anything else.
If you come here for opportunity, bring some money with you.

ha ha
"Give us your white and your wealthy?"

Are you writing this from prison?
Have you been tried and convicted of shooting immigrants?

While the indigenous peoples often can't get past a high school education because they
can't afford it, they should not be paying for welfare programs and college loans for aliens
who don't even have the respect for my country to enter it legally.

ha ha

I sure wish I had you as a guest on BartCop radio.
You're like the KKK guy who visits Stern now and then.
He's the funniest guy on Stern's show.

I didn't take the initiative in inventing the Internet.

Correct, Al Gore did that.
Did you slip in some truth to see if I was still awake?

I thought the Taco Bell dog was funny.

Me, too!

I want them to bring back safe and sane fireworks.

You mean the ones that burn down the neighbor's house?
You need to move to the country, Bill.

I believe no one ever died because of something Ozzy Osbourne, Ice-T or Marilyn Manson sang,
but that doesn't mean I want to listen to that crap from someone else's car when I'm stopped at a red light.
But I respect your right to listen to crap with your windows closed shut.

That's mighty white of you.
Is this long-ass rant much longer?

I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment
than working at Blockbuster, McDonald's or Jack In The Box.

ha ha
Make him stop!

First you demand the immigrants learn English but now you're anti-education?
By the way, what time does your shift start at Jack in the Pants?

<snip>

Our soldiers did not go to some foreign country and risk their lives in vain and defend
our Constitution so that decades later you can tell me it's a "living document" ever
changing and is open to interpretation. Pure Bulltwaddle. The guys who wrote it
were light years ahead of anyone today, and they meant what they said - now leave
the document alone, or there's going to be trouble.

Please don't rent a Ryder truck and blow up a day care - promise?

I don't hate the rich. I help the poor. I know wrestling is fake.

Are you under the impression you're getting paid by the word?

I know Liberals are phony and want to steal my money and give it to aliens,
poor people and minorities just to buy their votes so they can get elected to
offices and lord power over all of us. I know every election Democrats stuff
the ballot box with illegal votes...millions of votes.
Otherwise Democrats wouldn't win dogcatcher.

We won the last three presidential popular votes, so you could be wrong.

I've never owned, or was a slave, and a large percentage of our forefathers weren't wealthy
enough to own one either. Most wouldn't have anyway on moral grounds. Please stop blaming me
because some prior white people were idiots - and remember, tons of white, Indian, Chinese,
and other races have been enslaved and were slaveholders, too -it was wrong for every one of them.

You are against enslaving blacks?
I though you were a conservative Republican...

I believe a self-righteous Liberal Democrat with a cause is more dangerous than a Hell's Angel with an attitude.

Bill, ignorance is your enemy, not liberal democrats.

I want to know exactly which church is it where the "Reverend" Jesse Jackson preaches;
and, what exactly is his job function. Who pays his salary? When did he file his last tax return?

All that is your business, just like Clinton's zipper.

<snip>

I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child.

Bob Dole disagrees with you.
He said when he came home from Word War II, the entire village
of Russell, Kansas chipped in and helped with his recovery.

It takes a parent with the guts to stand up to the kid and spank his butt and say "NO!"
when it's necessary to do so. No New York Senator should ever raise anyone elses child.
In fact I want my children protected forever from her. She is the Wicked Witch
>From The East and a known Commie Bitch.

I understand. She's an American, and you hate America.

I didn't realize Dr. Seuss was a genius until I had a kid.

Koresh - you have a child?
Are you raising your child to hate all things American, too?

I will not be frowned upon or be looked down upon or be made to keep silent
because I have these beliefs and opinions. I thought this country allowed me that right.
Why do people like you want to silence me and call themselves Americans at the same time?

I never met you - never even knew your name until you jumped into my mailbox screaming
You need to know who I am!
Now you want to be left alone?

...are you any relation to Paula Jones?

I'm neither angry nor disenfranchised,

ha ha

No, not you.
You're a happy man enjoying life, right?
You just sent a 5,000 word manifesto with reason why you hate America,
but you're not angry - noooooooooooooooooo.

Yes, I guess by some people's definition, I may be a Real Patriotic American.

Yeah, I think Tim McVeigh would've like to have known you.
He held many of the same beliefs.

And if you disagree with me, you can kiss my round patriotic ass that belongs
to a Real Patriotic American, not someone like you.

Bill Adams

Bill, thanks.
You were good for some laughs.
My favorite part was your Jack in the Pants rant.

Please don't rent any Ryder trucks - promise?

And expect some mail from Lanny.
You two have a lot to talk about.