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   by Maureen Dowd - she hates everybody

 

Mildred Wirt Benson, the woman who wrote most of the original Nancy Drew mysteries under the pen name
Carolyn Keene, died at 96 last week. Her teen-age detective, a plucky strawberry blonde with a blue roadster,
emboldened millions of little girls to think they could outwit the world. The successors of the pretty young sleuth
who always tripped up the bad guys are legion: Sarah Michelle Gellar in "Buffy," Jennifer Garner in "Alias,"
Jill Hennessy in "Crossing Jordan" and, most famously, the crackerjack F.B.I. agent Clarice Starling,
the dot-connecting nemesis of Hannibal Lecter.

If the spirited Nancy Drew had grown up, she would probably have ended up a dispirited whistle-blower.
That's what happens to women of ingenuity and integrity in macho organizations — from Sherron Watkins at Enron to
Coleen Rowley at the F.B.I. — who piece together clues and ferret out criminal behavior and management cover-ups.

First, their male superiors tell them to shut up. And if the women point fingers anyhow, they end up being painted by
their status-quo colleagues as wacky, off-the-reservation snitches with dubious futures.  Even though the F.B.I. chief,
Robert Mueller, praised Ms. Rowley during his press conference on Wednesday, street agents, or "brick agents"
as those who hit the bricks are called, whisper that her days are numbered.

"I think your statements demonstrate a rush to judgment to protect the F.B.I. at all costs," she told her boss in a classic understatement. She shot her 13-page memo not only to Mr. Mueller, who immediately tried to bury it with a "classified"
stamp, but also to two lawmakers on a Congressional intelligence panel. Some of her colleagues say that the F.B.I.
culture disdains such out-of-school disclosures and predict that she will be shunned and isolated.

By contrast, Kenneth Williams, the prescient Phoenix agent who did the vivid memo about Osama's thugs congregating
at flight schools, stayed inside the family. He was the organization guy who went through channels and put the bureau
in the best light before senators.

If it were not for Coleen Rowley's courage, Mr. Mueller and other Bush officials would still be insisting they couldn't
possibly have known or imagined or hindered the terrorists' grand plan. And, of course, two months ago Rummy and
Ari Fleischer were insisting that Al Qaeda was crippled and on the run.

Now we know the truth: The 9/11 terrorists could have been stopped, if everyone in the F.B.I. had been as hard-working
and quick-witted as Special Agent Rowley. Or if the law enforcement agencies had not been so inept, obstructionist,
arrogant, antiquated, bloated and turf-conscious — and timid about racial profiling. As The Economist notes, "There is
a big difference between policemen picking on speeding black drivers and spies targeting Arabs who might harbor plans
to set off nuclear bombs."

So now comes John Ashcroft, saying that everything will be fine because the F.B.I. has begun Googling and dropping in unannounced at the SuicidePilots.com chat room. And now comes Mr. Mueller with his big blue charts, acting as though
national security is a marketing problem. All that was missing from the director's presentation was a new logo.
How about a swoosh on F.B.I. badges: Just Do It.

Last on his top 10 list of priorities was "update technology." That's not going to be so easy, given that the agents still
can't even use their e-mail with agency computers. Perhaps it would be easier to just shut down the F.B.I. and reboot
with a lean, mean domestic counterterrorism machine.

I'm sick of all these colliding flow charts and color-coded warnings. I want to see some agents lose their jobs.
Let's start with the counterterrorism whiz who told Ms. Rowley that her team could not get a search warrant because
Zacarias Moussaoui had such a common name in France. Bye-bye. Or the counterterrorism braniac who found the
Minneapolis and Phoenix warning memos in his In Box and put them in his Out Box. Get lost. (There's an accounting
job waiting for you at Halliburton.)

The president should snap out of his jet lag, summon his national security team (Tenet and Rove) and issue a single
remorseless instruction: "Bring me the head of Osama bin Laden. Or Bob Mueller."

 
 

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