A memorandum leaked to the press has been circulated, which follows.
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BREAKING NEWS:
Memo Status: TOP SECRET
Memo Subject: INVASION
OF ICELAND
(Another country starting with "I")
Objective: Isolate and terminate with extreme prejudice the followers of one (1) "Bjork".
Background: Singer "Bjork" postulates a free world of 'sensual love
and good
karma ' [NB Ashcroft: 'Karma' may be a drug; Ask Walters to research
ASAP]
Situation: Too many Icelanders believe that life, love and happiness
are possible,
and their lifestyle condones rampant free sexual activity, and exemplifies
being
against against good Christian values.
Mission Scope:
Island populated by 279,384 (July 2002 est.) people.
Required forces to invade Greenland (85,000 troops est.)
Mission Duration: 6.5 years
Mission Cost: should be three times $25.billion
(might as well factor in the Halliburton 'accidental cost overruns' in
advance)
Benefits: Cooler in summer than Iran, women speak English and don't
wear burkas,
closer to home so the other half of military not engaged in Europe, Afghanistan
or Iraq
can be dispatched quickly;
THAT NATION HAS NO MILITARY:
we, potentially, could really win this one.
For your approval, Mr. President
Drew Schaefer