POLITICS - HUMOR - FINE TEQUILA - TRAVEL - ENTERTAINMENT |
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Gene
Lyons
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PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com .Support Bartcop.com POBox 54466.... Tulsa,OK 74155 |
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Quotes
"Take it from me, when you buy a Bose
wave radio,
you'll be hearing sweet,
clear highs and a deep, rich bass."
--The vulgar Pigboy, who is deaf
"If you want the worst, buy from Bose.
You get no highs, and you get
no lows."
-- BartCop, 27-year owner of fine RTR
speakers
GOP
Anger at President Gore's War Actions
by Bernard Weiner
Excerpt:
"We are looking like a superpower bully, hitting
villages and aid agencies and innocent civilians,"
said House Majority Leader Dick Armey,
"bombing days after our generals have asserted that
we have total air superiority. Don't the
Democrats see how fragile our coalition is? We risk having
all the Muslim countries abandoning us
if we don't stop."
From: louh@mid.org
Subject: WSJ Reading Bartcop?
bc,
I'm still stunned after reading on page 1 in Thursday's
Wall Street Journal this statement
about what kind of economic stimulus package
would actually stimulate the economy:
"People who spend every dollar that they take
in will probably
spend every extra dollar the government
offers."
The column went on to trash every one of the Republican's
pet tax theories.
I can't believe they printed that. Is there
hope?
Lou
Lou, I not sure about hope, but there is shock.
The stock market tripled under Clinton, but those idiots supported
Weak & Stupid
who is now crashing their fortunes into the ground - but they love
him, anyway.
Just like the military that prefers bodybags under Reagan/Bush to peace
under Clinton,
Wall Street would rather go bankrupt with Smirk the Wonder Dog than
make a profit with Gore.
So no, ...there's no hope.
From: Bushwatch
"If this were a dictatorship, it'd be a heck
of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator."
-- G. W. Bush, 12/18/00
Bush "has just assumed what amounts to
dictatorial power..."
-- William Safire, 11/15/01
U.S. Policy Towards Taliban Influenced by Oil - Say Authors
Full Story now with working link
PARIS, Nov 15 (IPS) - Under the influence of U.S.
oil companies, the government of
George W. Bush initially blocked U.S. secret
service investigations on terrorism, while it
bargained with the Taliban the delivery of Osama
bin Laden in exchange for political
recognition and economic aid, two French intelligence
analysts claim.
In the book ''Bin Laden, the forbidden truth'',
the authors reveal that the FBI's deputy
director John O'Neill resigned in July in protest
over the obstruction.
The authors claim O'Neill told them that ''the
main obstacles to investigate Islamic terrorism
were U.S. oil corporate interests and the role
played by Saudi Arabia in it''. They claim the U.S.
government's main objective in Afghanistan was
to consolidate the position of the Taliban
regime to obtain access to the oil and gas reserves
in Central Asia.
Until now, says the book, ''the oil and gas reserves
of Central Asia have
been controlled by Russia. The Bush government
wanted to change all that''.
Hell, this is no surprise.
Bush can't take a whiz without asking how it affects the price of oil.
The Bush Family Evil Empire always puts their interests first,
then America's.
Good News, Bad News
The good news is with Vic out with a heart attack, I sold a
car!
(I know as much about cars as I do guitars.)
When the fella got all signed up, I handed him his keys and walked
him outside.
He got behind the wheel, started the engine and lit a cigarette.
I told him, "No, no, that's a non-smoking car!"
He looked at me with much puzzlement and said, "I
can't smoke in this car?"
And I smiled and said, "Just kidding. That's your car,
you can do anything you want in your car."
The bad news is, I called that nutty Vic and he said his shoulder
and left arm were hurting.
I told him I know as much about medicine as I do cars and guitars,
but it sure sounded to me
like his heart attack was getting worse and Vic said, "I'll
eat some more aspirin."
as tho that would be as good as going to the Emergency Room.
Why are men such pig-headed idiots?
Wasn't it just yesterday I asked why dictators ignore it when
a US president
(even an illegally-installed one) when they say our military
is coming after them?
It makes less sense to ignore a heart episode than to ignore
a president,
but men can sometimes be pig-headed idiots.
Let's hope tomoro doesn't bring bad news about Vic.
Quotes
"We're looking like a third world country
with military tribunals and holding people without charges.
It doesn't sound like America,
and a year or two from now, we'll be saying, 'Why did we let this happen?'
"
--James Zogby, president
of the Arab American Institute.
Hey, James, some of us are asking that question right now,
but our hammers are so small that nobody notices.
Writing
History to Executive Order
by Richard Reeves
Excerpt:
With a stroke of the pen on Nov. 1, President
Bush stabbed history in the back and
blocked Americans' right to know how presidents
(and vice presidents) have made decisions.
Executive Order 13223 ended more than 30
years of increasing openness in government.
Reeves is going to lose his job when Mr Rove finds out that he
wrote a story
that was off script and actually criticized the unelected President
Bunnypants.
Vic didn't come to work today.
He said he has shortness of breath and chest pains. (He's 58 and
smokes like Kandahar.)
I asked him if he was going to the ER or just a regular doctor
and he said,
"Fuck those doctors. All they want is
my money."
Why are men so stupid?
You'd never hear a woman say, "fuck a doctor" during a heart
attack,
but men do stupid shit like that all the time.
Not me.
Drive my wheezing ass to the ER with sirens blaring.
Stat!
Run the red lights - do whatever is necessary because I'm agnostic.
Let's hope that I don't lose TWO friends to heart attacks this
year.
Koresh, it's a four-man office.
Bush using psychics in Afghanistan
Lots of good stuff over at today.
Quotes
"I was on Air Force One the day of the
attack, working my way back to Washington
via Louisiana and Nebraska making
sure that the president was safe and secure."
--Bush speaking at a high school in Crawford,
Texas. (11/15/01)
Was he joking around or is he too goddamn stupid to know hid
Daddy and his hand-picked
gang of thugs installed him as president against the wishes
of the voters?
Two bored casino dealers were waiting at
a craps table.
A very attractive blonde woman arrived
and bet twenty-thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice.
She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I
feel much luckier when I'm completely nude."
With that she stripped off all her clothes,
rolled the dice and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!"
Then she hollered..."YES! YES! I WON! I
WON!"
She jumped up and down and hugged each
of the dealers.
With that she picked up all the money and
clothes and quickly departed.
The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded.
Finally, one of them asked, "What did she
roll?"
The other answered, "I thought YOU were
watching!"
Moral: Not all blondes are dumb, but most
men ARE gullible.
Note: That joke was sent in by a woman who bought Gennifer Flowers's home.
Leahy challenges Bush on military tribunals
I didn't even read this story because it can't possibly be true.
Leahy is the Number One Wimp in the
Senate.
When Karl Rove barks, Leahy soils himself in fear.
If Bush was bulldozing Leahy's mother's home,
he would stand there and beg Karl Rove's forgiveness.
Can't we somehow lose Leahy?
Doesn't he need to go to Hollywood and be in another Batman movie?
Is any Democratic senator as worthless as Leahy?
That C.S.I. last night was hot & steamy, wasn't it?
Have you ever seen anything like that on commercial TV?
Reminder: this show was Number 3 on all of TV last
week
They were investigating a bondage death, so they went to a bondage
dungeon
and CBS showed weirdness that I'd only heard about before. (no
cough)
The Marg Hellenberger character was once a Vegas stripper, so
when Miss Discipline
started teasing her about not knowing what it's like to overpower
a man, Marg just smiled.
It was funny to watch, because the CSI team is always the cool
and collected bunch,
but this time things were steamy & weird and Miss Discipline
was working them like clients.
I realize I'm doing a terrible job of describing the episode.
I think it's one of those had-to-be-there deals.
Anyway, they got their man.
...and last night's Friends continued
to bring home the goods.
The whole show has new life and a new
spark.
I liked Dark Angel the first year. Jessica Alba is a hottie,
and they always had her playing the vic,
only to beat the crap out of the big goons when they tried to
help her. But this year they went from
an X-Files, trust no one, fight the power kind of show
to a really strange Invasion of the Dog People deal.
Max (Alba) has a twinge of cat DNA in her blood, which makes her
stronger, she can hear and see better,
she can jump twenty feet up if she needs to - that kind of thing.
Sure, it's a weird deal, but like that craps
joke (above) you can get away with almost anything if the girl
is cute.
But now they have these dog people and I just can't hack it. I
like dogs in real life, but these dog people
look like dogs and I just can't go there. Before the season is
over, they're likely to have Max fall in love
with a dog man and nobody wants to go there, right? Mrs. BartCop
still watches, but I surf or chat, instead.
Sidebar:
In real life, Alba is engaged to her co-star,
the former wheelchair guy. In an effort to keep the sexual tension
between them tight, the writers inflicted
Max with a virus (or something, I don't know) that makes her like
kryptonite to her co-star and real-life
boyfriend. This way, they can have a conversation but if she ever touches
him they halt shooting and start over to
keep them from making goo-goo eyes at each other on the show.
So you Dark Angel writers (I know you're reading this)
- can you find a way to get the dogs off the screen?
They're like all those elbow-on-the-nose aliens that plagued
Voyager
and Next Generation.
You can have all the aliens you want, but if they're Rush-butt-ugly,
it makes the screen hard to look at.
Instead of Max helping the dog people each week, get rid of them
(humanely) and make wheelchair boy
a cop or a private detective so he & Max can fight crimes
or something.
Okay, Now I’m Scared
Excerpt:
I refer to the more ominous events reported
by cyber-journalist Matt Drudge the night before.
The headline read, "Big Media Florida
Recount: Gore Topped Bush If All Under/Over Votes Counted."
The myth of the stolen election had returned.
Wait a minute...
Drudge got the story right?
The entire whore mainstream media screamed "Bush
won for sure"
while Drudge got it right and honestly called the story like
it read?
What's this country coming to when gossip-monger eggboy Matt Drudge
is more trust-worthy
than the NY Whore Times, the Washington Whore Post, USA Whore
Today and CCN etc etc etc?
Quotes
"Charles Manson just turned 67 years
old. He's getting very old now.
He now has to wear a hearing
aid just so he can hear the voices inside his head."
-- Leno
"The Taliban is on the run and don't
know where to go. Pakistan doesn't want them.
Iran doesn't want them.
Of course, they'll have no problem getting into this country."
-- Dave
"John Ashcroft issued a terrorism warning,
asking all Americans to be on the high alert this week.
Then on Friday, he announced that the
period of high alert would be extended indefinitely.
I think I speak for all Americans when
I say, 'Bitch, I can't be any more alert than I already am. Okay?'
I'm opening my mail with salad tongs.
I take my passport in the shower with me.
I'm watching so much CNN, I'm having
sex dreams about Wolf Blitzer."
-- Tina Fey on Saturday Night Live's "Weekend Update"
U2 in LA
Excerpt:
Intensity level was raised considerably
during the encores, beginning with the chilling anti-war song
"Bullet the Blue Sky,'' and then moving to Bono
and Gwen Stefani, from opening act No Doubt,
dueting on Marvin Gaye's ``What's Going
On.'' (Both are featured on the current charity single.)
Finally, the band began to play ``One,''
a plea for universal love taken from 1991's ``Achtung Baby,''
and the names of the crew members and passengers
from the flights that crashed on Sept. 11,
as well as lost NYPD and FDNY personnel,
were scrolled in large letters on screens behind
the band, leaving many attendees visibly
shaken.
Don't let the bastards win.
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