Fair & balanced POLITICS - HUMOR - FINE TEQUILA - OUTRAGE TRAVEL - SPORTS - MUSIC - ENTERTAINMENT Before we name
more schools & airports after Ronald Reagan,
|
||||
|
||||
|
BartCop, come to Vegas!
|
|
Links Demo
Underground
Chat
& Post
New
to BartCop?
|
Does Tom Daschle read bartcop.com?
Daschle hits Bush on Social Security
Excerpt:
Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle yesterday
tried to politicize the bankruptcy of Enron Corp.
for the first time by comparing it to President
Bush's handling of Social Security.
"I don't want to 'Enron' the people of the
United States," Mr. Daschle told reporters,
"I don't want to see them holding the bag
at the end of the day,
just like Enron employees have held
the bag," he said of seniors.
ha ha
Use anything you like, Tom.
Quotes
"Persons who cannot see as well, read
as well or understand as well still cannot count on
Florida to protect their basic
civil right under the Florida Constitution to cast in secret their ballot."
You know who said that?
You sitting down?
Brace yourself...
It was Katherine Harris, the most famous vote rapist in American
history.
Budget Reversal To Yield Deficit
Administration's
Debt Estimate for '02 Is $106 Billion
Excerpt:
The federal government is projected to run a
$106 billion deficit this year,
confirming the sharpest turnabout in the nation's
fiscal health in half a century.
Two points:
Bush promised he'd take America in a new direction, and he has.
Also, I guarantee he's lying about the numbers.
Copy and paste this somewhere so you can call me on it a year from now.
If President Happy Crack predicts a $106 billion deficit, it'll be
over $200 billion.
He's going to Enron the whole country with his phony projections, just
like Kenny Boy.
The Bush Family Evil Empire always gets theirs, just like Hyman
Roth.
Now, repeat after me, "Ich bin ein Enroner."
Oh, God, what did we do to anger you so?
Potter witchcraft accusation hits Pa. town
The Penryn, PA police department has refused
to direct traffic at a YMCA triathlon
because it says the club promotes witchcraft
by reading Harry Potter books to children.
This is a smart move.
Those kids have no business reading books at some damn library
when they could be out smoking dope, having sex and joining gangs.
From: nancy.maynard@amti.com
Subject: Does Rep Greenwood read Bartcop?
Excerpt:
Duncan looked wan and reserved as Rep. Jim Greenwood
(R-Pa.), chairman of
the House Energy and Commerce's oversight and
investigations subcommittee,
pressed for answers that might help unravel the
story behind Enron's collapse.
"Mr. Duncan, Enron robbed the bank," Greenwood
said.
"Andersen provided the getaway car. And they
say you were at the wheel."
Quotes
"How can you expect to be taken seriously
after you've spread your legs
for a camera?"
-- Laura Schlessinger, swear to Koresh
Psychic
Ops
"Remote viewers" say the Feds have sought their help since 9/11.
Might this explain all those "credible, nonspecific threats"?
Found on a Yahoo Forum bb
The
First Six Months of George W. Bush:
Whatever your beliefs, know what your president is
doing.
Here is a list of his work in his first six months:
I need a lawyer/private detective in Los Angeles.
Not a dove Democrat in a pink skirt, no, I need a Karl Rove-type
weasel,
a nasty-ass Republican bastard with no conscience or semblance
of morals,
...but I repeat myself.
If you are that lawyer or private detective, e-mail me your phone number.
From: badcompany@1st.net
Subject: Why Rush won't talk to a non-screened audience
Bart Cop,
In answer to your question about why the Limpdick
won't appear on a serious show;
you may not have seen this particular episode
when it occurred, however, when Limpdick
was a 'rookie' on the radio talk circuit in the
Ohio area(this was around the same time the
Rodney King thing went down), Phil Donahue had
invited Rush on his show.
That particular afternoon, Donahue had a large
audience of women, and the discussion centered on,
"The Woman's Right to Choose" and diverse factors
involved in a woman's choice to have an abortion,
for example poverty, rape, etc.
Rush kept running his face about how "immoral"
and "evil" abortion is, and on and on how women
should be ashamed of themselves and so forth.
A lady in the audience confronted the windy wonder
with a hypothetical question involving the rape
of his daughter by a black man; would he, as the father
of the girl, demand she get an abortion?
You had to see it to believe it!
Much him-hawing later, the lady finally got the
windbag to admit that, yes, in that case he would favor an abortion.
I remember it well, and from that day on, Limpdick
never made an appearance on a live talk show.
He, apparently, realized that he did not have
control of the audience or questions and it killed him on Donahue.
bikertrash
Remember Phillip Schuman's 'FDR recession?'
A rebuttal, with a chart.
Contest Winner
Congrats to EJM3 for being first to post the correct answer to yesterday's quiz.
EJM3, send me your address so the South's
Finest Chocolate Factory
can send you a pound of chocolate and an order of these
things.
..for..
"Hi, I'm
Dr. Laura for Kumho Tires.
Next time you need tires, buy Kumho.
When you think of Kumho, think of me, Dr. Laura."
From: Madcatmusic@aol.com
Subject: Deaf pig
I have the same condition as Pigboy but I can't
afford a miracle.
Madcat
Attention
If you are a reporter with a story that your editor won't let
you run, contact me.
If you're "just a nobody" with some information and you have
no way to get it out, contact me.
Surprise Update
Surprise #1, the one that can happen any minute, hasn't
happened yet.
Each minute that goes by without the surprise happening is more
puzzling than the last.
It's a win-win for everybody with no down side, and how rare
is that?
I have faith. Surprise #1 should happen any minute,
and I'll keep you posted.
Surprise #2 is only slightly late.
We thought we might know something late Tuesday, but now it's
mid-Thursday,
...so, like with Surprise #1, it should happen any minute.
Surprise #2 is the long-shot of the three surprises.
Surprise #3 is going to happen.
ha ha
Can you say, "Sweet?"
ha ha
If you've had it up to HERE with my crap, stick around just a
little longer.
Trust me, ...I'm Catholic.
Oh, ...Oh, ...Oh!
Damn, I can't say anything, but a guy Christian knows,
"the man with the hat"
is about to make some big news on a often-mentioned bartcop.com
subject.
Even after it happens, I can't say anything, but he called and
asked me
if I wanted to be there when the big event got placed into motion.
ha ha
Right now Christian is saying, "No way..."
Christian, ...way!
From: (Model T)
Subject: garbage
Wanted you to know I bought the new Garbage CD,
Beautiful Garbage, on your recommendation.
It's pretty good. I'll let you know in a few
days if it stays on the CD player.
Calvin
Calvin,
I recommend, Can't Cry These Tears, Cherry Lips and Untouchable
to get things going.
By the time you get to Cup of Coffee, you'll be hooked.
"I am the
Central Scrutinizer.
I
thought I ordered these pagans to be secretly tortured to death.
What,
all the secret torture rooms are full?
I'd
better ask the President for money to build more secret torture rooms."
This Just In...
President
Bush proposes extra $37.7 billion to protect
an
America he said was "still under attack.''
"Hot Damn!
I
can build a lot of secret torture rooms with that $37 billion.
I
can build an entire secret torture complex with that kind of money.
I'll
get rid of these pagans, the liberals, the queers and the negroes.
The
Constitution doesn't apply to them, that's for sure.
Oh, I love my job...
I should send Pat Leahy a special thank you note."
Quotes
"Where's Jack Ruby when we need him?"
--the vulgar Pigboy, again and again today,
suggesting John Lindh Walker be executed
without a trial.
Saw it on the BartCop Chat & Post...
Posted by MarzipanFruit
I just got some chocolate I ordered from
that place and it is un-freaking-believable.
It almost makes me cry with satisfaction.
I ordered the breakable milk chocolate
triangles like Bartcop said and also an assorted box.
Treat yourself or your honey to this stuff
- it's dynamite.
I tried to order from the website, but
for some reason it never works.
Then when I called the 800 number the lady
was SUPER nice.
Tyson-Lewis Fight In Doubt After Tyson BITES Lewis
Pop
Quiz
(no chocolate this time)
Who was the last heavyweight champion not bitten by Mike Tyson?
Shirley Manson, contact bartcop.com
Send me your sticker pics!
Sticker Contest!
Still no sticker pictures...
There is a rock group that has paid for a banner run
but I can't find your banner or address.
Lemme know so I can run it...
Headlines from today's exciting
Jennifer Connelly Happy With Nude Scenes,
Winona Ryder Dumped By Boyfriend,
Friends Stars Offered $1 Million Per
Episode,
Harrison Ford and Minnie Driver 'Like
Lovesick Kids'
Indiana Jones 4 A Go,
..and what was The Perfect Rock & Roll Photo Of All Time?
There's those stories and tons more.
Not so happy Birthdays...
John Belushi (1949) Sharon Tate (1943)
...ayiyiyiyiyiyi!
...the BartCop
Hex!
I ain't never had
no hex on me before!
Maybe John Breaux
knows some voodoo
that can reverse
the BartCop Hex.
Ol' John's my best
buddy.
He'll do anything
for me.
PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com
.Support
Bartcop.com
POBox 54466....
Tulsa,OK 74155
Shopping online?
Use the portal below and they'll throw bartcop.com
a nickel and
it costs you nothing more than whatever you were going
to pay.
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2002,
bartcop.com
Shirley Manson, contact bartcop.com