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Jeb Bush's daughter arrested on drug charge
Apparently this is not a gag.
KPCC Reveals
President Bush Has A Heart Arrhythmia
White House did not disclose after Pretzel Incident that Mr. Bush has
Sinus Bradycardia
Excerpt:
"The president has sinus bradycardia consistent
with athletic conditioning," White House physician Dr. Richard Tubb
said through White House spokesman Ken
Lisaius. "The president's resting heart rate is 38 to 49 beats per minute."
"That's the very definition of bradycardia," said
Dr. Harold Karpman, a heart specialist
at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles
and a clinical professor at UCLA.
Indeed, any heart rate slower than 60 beats
per minutes is, by definition, bradycardia.
So he's weak, stupid, crooked and sick?
Why was this held back from the voters?
Why didn't the whore press do their job and ask?
How appropriate is this?
You know, the two statutes in the Justice Department
building
were named "The Spirit of Justice" and
"The Majesty of Law."
How appropriate is it that Ashcroft has now hidden
the Spirit of Justice
and the Majesty of Law behind a thick black veil?
<+< :) Pope Buck I
Quotes
"To believe that capitalists will behave
honorably just because they are engaged in capitalism
is akin to believing that
no priest will engage in pedophilia simply because he is a priest.
Our godfather Adam Smith somewhere
remarked that the view of more than two businessmen
talking together in a corner
justifies the suspicion that they are discussing devices in restraint of
trade."
- William F. Buckey from his book, "Give it
back."
Quotes
"...that's not the overall objective.
Our overall objective is to defeat
terrorism, wherever it is around the world.
And so, our objective is not
to get Osama bin Laden."
-- Andy Card, telling us bin Laden's no longer
that important
"Bin Laden by himself isn't that big
a threat.
Bin Laden connected to this worldwide
organization of terror is a threat."
-- Dick Cheney, telling us bin Laden's no longer
that important
Hey! Hey! Hey!
I supported this war because you said you were going to smoke that mother-effer!
I don't want to hear any of this "We
almost got him," horseshit
like Poppy gave us with Saddam.
If our boys are getting tired and discouraged, show them this,
...and remind them why they're there.
This is crap!
I know for Bush, Cheney and Rummy this is "an
opportunity for a pipeline,"
but for some of us it's more serious than just another slick
oil deal, you greedy slugs.
And don't be talking about invading other countries until bin Laden's dead ass stops smoking.
...but,
...I'm sure the Democrats will allow you to build your pipeline and claim victory either way.
From: lumpykassiterman@usa.com
Subject: Daschle Is Ruining Us
BartCop,
That damn Daschle is killing us. He just does
not know when to shut up.
He doesn't have the good sense to keep our socialist
agenda quiet
and he insults Bush at times when the public
loves him.
That SOB Daschle is going to ruin our chances
this fall.
It is going to be tough enough to win back
our seats let alone even pick up one new one.
It looks worse every day. This damn Enron
thing is backfiring.
Daschle should have checked out fellow Democrats
first.
Now it looks like Lieberman got tons of dough
and
a bunch of our boys got rich off Enron.
Wish he'd just shut up.
Lumpy Kassiterman
ha ha
Lumpy, thanks for being on the team!
Can you come right over?
ha ha
I have dark Democratic secrets to share with you
The worst part is you're right!
If someone says, "boo" to the Democrats, they crumble like a South's
Finest Eskimo Fudge bar.
Bart,
You have helped hold alot of people together lately.
This is the only way I could think of to show
it.
Thanks for being you.
Shelly
From: pamgreen@cac.net
Subject: Bush - "Raising twins more trouble than war"
Just when you think the arrogant bastard can't say anything more stupid ...
According to the Associated Press, when the un-president
visited West Virginia last week he spoke with
the Democratic speaker of the West Virginia House,
Bob Kiss. (I know ... insert your own tutu joke here)
Anyway, Kiss apparently has 5 week old twin boys
(who haven't started drinking yet) and told Bush if he
wasn't doing anything he could come by for the
3 a.m. feeding.
I can't believe I read this, but ... Bush joked,
'I've been to war. I've raised twins.
If I had a choice, I'd rather go to war' ".
Excuse me, I need a moment. Talk amongst yourselves.
Just to hit the high points:
How difficult
is it to raise a total of 2 children (even if they are born at the same
time) with unlimited funds
and little direct contact
between parent and children?
When, exactly,
has he ever been to war?
Do you
suppose the folks on the receiving end of his preferred pastime would have
liked the opportunity
to raise their own #$@!&*!!
children as opposed to having them killed by war?
I don't think there's enough tequila out there
to get me through the next 3 years.
Now, now, don't make fun of George.
Watching Pickles raise the twins is the toughest job he's ever had.
Ode to Kenny
Boy
by MadKane
Excerpt:
(To be sung to the tune of "Danny Boy")
Oh Kenny Boy, the jails, the jails are calling,
From state to state, and through the world
so wide.
The money's gone, and all the chips are falling,
'Tis you, 'tis you must go and you must hide.
Click Here for the whole deal
ha ha
Good stuff, Maddie
Bonus Issue
Today's issue is so big (and getting bigger
as you read this) I cut the entire
middle section and put it on a second page
so there'd be room for it all.
There's almost an entire Bonus Issue if you Click Here
This isn't retreads or repeats, it's bonus bartcop.com
Day
8 of the Shirley Manson log
So far,
...have not heard from Shirley.
Shirley Manson - contact bartcop.com
Check today's
The African Queen, (no, not Clarence Slappy Thomas)
Conan O'Brian moving?
Ellen has been cancelled,
trouble with the new Austin Powers movie title,
a giant snow mouse,
Bruce Willis in a bra and dress (again?)
Craig Kilborn's movie,
Josh's wife mud-wrestles with Susan Sarandon on "Malcolm,"
Don Rickles,
Mike Douglas,
Meg Ryan,
Chris Rock,
Jackie Gleason,
Limp Bizkit ...it just keeps going and going.
Check today's
Quotes
"Fascism will come to America labeled
as anti-fascism."
-- Huey Long
Words to remember in these days of "Homeland Security" and "Peacemaker" missiles.
Sharon
Baxter
Medical Examiner no stranger to scandals
Did a Bush Ally certify Baxter's death a 'suicide?'
from DemocratUnderground.com
Her past includes:
Harris
County medical examiner fined for illegal autopsies, keeps job
Victory
for Crime Lab Director accusing TX Lab of abuses
Parents
Against Corruption and Coverup
Legal
review of examiner's office sought
County official wants to know
`what's going on over there'
I'm surprised they bothered with a different crooked coroner than
that
Missouri dude who ruled that Lori Klausutis
healthed herself to death.
Rockefeller Joke On SNL
After Rockefeller died,
Saturday Night Live started their next
show with Don Pardo saying,
"'Emergency,' starring Megan Marshak, will
not be seen tonight,
so that we can bring you the
following special program."
Koresh, ha ha, that's awful.
Happy Birthday to...
....
....
....
Gia Carangi isn't 42
Heather Graham is 32
Kelly Packard is 27
Katharine Ross (1942)
Also born today: W.C. Fields (1880) Dolly Parton
(1946) Oprah call Dave (1954)
Aeneas Williams (1968) who, strange as it sounds, might be the
most talented of the St Louis Rams
Oh, also Happy 43 Birthday to Cliff 
our Consumer Consumption expert!
Reminder:
Someday, maybe soon, a U.S. fighter pilot will be shot down over
enemy territory.
The hostile country that finds him will then announce:
"He is not a prisoner of war, he is a
common criminal who killed innocent civilians.
So, just like President Bush
says, will will torture and execute him as we deem fair."
Way to go, George, Dick and Rummy.
You're going to get some brave men killed, dumbass!
...help meeeeeeeeee!
Daddy, you
promised this would be easy!!!
You told
me Enron was a solid corporation!
What?
...we lost
millions? ...really, Daddy?
Did they
fool you, Daddy, ...did they?
Did they
screw you, too?
What?
...first
time, you say?
Daddy, it's the BartCop Hex!
...ayayayayiii!
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Shirley Manson, contact bartcop.com