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The
real Whitewater shocker
by Joshua Micah Marshall at Salon.com
The independent counsel's report concedes there was no Clinton
scandal,
but details another one -- the role the first Bush administration
played.
The
bin Laden/B.F.E.E. link
a fast-loading audio-visual report
Whitman
Says Counsel Spoke About Senate Bid
by Raymond Hernandez of the New York Times
Excerpt:
Christie Whitman, the former governor of
New Jersey, acknowledged that
she and Robert Ray had talked briefly about
his plans to run for the Senate
in New Jersey while he was serving as the
Whitewater independent counsel.
"I swore
I was independent but all the time
I was planning my GOP senate campaign.
That makes me a liar and perjurer and
I belong in jail just like BartCop says."
From: Robin
My lovely wife is now hopelessly addicted
to Garbage.
"Special" is buzzing around her head at such
a rate that I fear we'll
have to seek medication, and even I must
confess to occasionally
hearing "Stupid Girl" running in the background
of my day.
If she likes Garbage, she'll like the soundtrack for Juliefest2002!
Housekeeping
That mailbox at mindspring.com isn't working out very well.
We'd better go back to using bartcop@bartcop.com
I can only get it at night, but it beats not getting it at all.
Going somewhere? ...like, ...maybe ...Washington DC on
April 27th?
Use this link and they'll send me a nickle.
So I met Greg Palast last night....
I asked Palast if he knew of bartcop.com.
He said, "Bartcop.com, yeah it's great.
They print my stuff sometimes."
So there's a quote for BC.
"Bartcop.com, yeah it's great."
- Greg Palast
E-mail sent from: http://www.geocities.com/theliberalmedia
Worth another look...
http://www.e-sheep.com/rusheats
It gets funnier with every click
OIC Makes It Official:
Whitewater
is Now a Republican Scandal
from our good friends at buzzflash.com
Excerpt:
Remember all of those Republicans gleefully
accusing the Clintons of wrongdoing?
Remember all those e-mails you received
from your conservative brother-in-law
with Whitewater accusations? It turns out
that every bit of that was crap.
If additional evidence existed, seven years,
$70 million and a relentless
investigation run by Clinton's enemies
would have uncovered it.
Yet the whores of the right and the Smirk-fawning press continue
to talk about
"Clinton's scandal-plagued administration"
as tho there was something there.
The most investigated man in all of history got a little tongue
- that's it.
Why was Clinton's zipper anybody's business?
Meanwhile, the Bush Family Evil Empire has stolen our right
to vote, shredded the
Constitution, slapped away Freedom of Speech and the Freedom
of Information Act,
they're going thru the US Treasury like a kid on candy at Halloween,
Ashcroft wants to
make criticism a treasonous offense and on and on and on, but
all the lazy-whore
press can report is "Clinton's scandal-plagued
administration."
Final
Word on Whitewater Probe Clears Clintons
the Washington Ho Post Thursday,
March 21, 2002
Excerpt:
Bill and Hillary Clinton made "factually
inaccurate" statements to federal investigators
during the eight-year Whitewater probe,
but there was not enough evidence to prove
the Clintons committed perjury or obstructed
justice, according to the final report of
the independent counsel released yesterday.
What a load of crap.
They tied the Clintons to a chair and for eight long years, FORCED
them to answer every
insulting and degrading intimate question that the sexually-frustrated
Republican monsters
could think of, just to see if any "factually inaccurate" statements
might fall out.
Hey, here's an idea...
Let's hold the man some call president to that same standard.
Let's try President Weak and Stupid in that chair for eight
days and see how he does.
Let's ask him about the abortion, going AWOL, Funeralgate, the
rigged election,
his secret children, how many times he's been arrested for cocaine
and so on...
The little snot would break like an Argentine savings and loan.
From: Bill
Subject: Bart Ideas Spreading to Academia
Remember your plan for Israel to stop the
suicide bombers?
Looks like Alan Dershowitz has been reading
bartcop.com
"The students were protesting a Mar. 11 op-ed
in the Jerusalem Post in which Dershowitz
suggested Israel issue a moratorium
on retaliation from terrorist attacks for about five days.
If terrorists then resumed their attacks,
Dershowitz said, then for every attack Israel should
bulldoze a Palestinian village that
had been “used as a base for terrorist operations”
—after giving the residents 24 hours
to leave. In addition, he suggested that Israel
announce a “waiting list” of villages
to be bulldozed in the event of further terrorist attacks.
Keep up the great work
-bill
Hey, Alan's a smart man.
PS-
Any plans to offer for sale (at a reasonable price, profits going to both
Julie and BC)
a BartCop Productions videotape of Juliefest2002?
You betcha.
The majority of readers can't get to DC, so we plan to have Video
Boy put the whole night on film,
perhaps with some behind-the-scenes "bonus footage," so
those who were able to attend can
watch it again and those who couldn't go can still get a slice
of that Julie magic.
I still need to find a distributor for the Julie Hiatt Steele action figures, tho...
Did
the Bush limit FBI investigations into al Qaeda
because
of pipeline negotiations with the Taliban?
This is kind of an old story, but we need to hammer it as long
as
the mainstream media outlets are covering up for the young Bush
boy.
Have you seen the Ozzy Osbourne show on MTV?
It could burn out real quick, but that's because it's burning
so hot
right now.
They make The Sopranos seem like broadcast TV.
I haven't talked to anyone who hasn't said this is the coolest
show on TV.
It's easily the most honest show on TV.
How honest is it?
Ozzy's wife to one of their kids: "Stop
doing that or I'll kick your fucking ass."
Sure, they bleep the "..uc.."
but you hear the "f__king" and I'm
sorry, but it's damn funny.
Watching a TV show with the family, the son innocently asks, "Who the fuck is Will Rogers?"
The daughter gets a new haircut and asks Mom for her reaction.
Mom says, "You're out of your fucking
mind."
Hey, I'm 48, I don't get a thrill out of hearing the "F" word,
but you're not going to have any idea
what I'm talking about until you see it. There'a an innocence
to this wacked-out family.
Mrs. BartCop has seen all three episodes and she says they rule.
The kids fight, they have like eight dogs who always fight, maybe
some cat's, too.
In next week's TV Guide, Ozzy says the neighbors get too loud
on New Year's Eve
so he has to go next door "and kick
some f-ing ass. It's all
on film, you'll see."
I don't know when it's on, so maybe somebody could write?
I'm bet Marty over at 
is all over The Osbourne's.
Speaking of...
There is lots and lots of entertaining
stuff at
Marty
has Oscar Fever!!
Check her site for details, but I believe
she's giving away a pound
of the best-tasting pure milk chocolate
in the whole world.
for the person who can most accurately
predict the Oscar winners.
Since likely more than one person will win,
maybe she'll devise
a tie-breaker, like what time the credits
roll when the broadcast is over.
Don't miss out!
Marty's
E! page is the best, and so's the chocolate
Subject: Profanity
Dear BartCop,
Like
it or not, you have become a source of solace to many of us out here
Barrytown (see 'Count Zero'). As what you do
gathers steam, I was wondering if you
might consider toning down the language of some
of your more outrageous remarks.
Mind you, I think the outrageousness is great;
it focuses the event.
But, the profanity tends to marginalize the quality
of the critique.
For
instance, I think that Ms. Steele would be an excellent candidate
for
Senator (Representative first). But that would
entail reaching the mass of Americans
who, for one reason or other, can't see the humor
in profanity. The fact that most
of us do who read your site couldn't win an election
for her and, as opposed to
His Might Incumberance, we would have to
elect her.
Just
a point for consideration.
Brian
Funny, if you check some back issues, you might notice a gradual
mellowing....
I'm not trying to be crude, I just speak with fewer filters than
most people.
And it hasn't been said in a while, but compared to HBO comics,
I'm cleaner than a Safeway chicken.
Put another way, Julie deserves better than this, I agree,
but right now, at least she has a voice, heard by dozens.
Maybe some rich big shot will be checking out bartcop.com
and read of Julie's misfortune
and offer her some cushy $100k job where she can work on her
book and get her story out
and live happily ever after with just the bad memories of Republican
fascism.
...just doing what I can.
An
Evening with Julie Hiatt Steele
n
Washington D.C.
Click
Here New Total
Write to Julie at PO Box 1351, Virginia Beach, VA 23451
E-mail to Julie, use juliehiattsteele@bartcop.com
PayPal to Julie, Click Here ->
To buy tickets to Julifest2002,
PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com
OR .Snail
mail to bartcop.com,
PO Box 54466.
Tulsa, OK 74155
If you send me anything send your phone number
Send Juliefest inquires/confirmations to Juliefest2002@yahoo.com
36 days from today.
We've almost got our West Coast Sweep for Juliefest
Larry Tooth from San Diego says he's coming. 
We're trying to convince BartCop
E!'s Marty in Los Angeles to fly in,
and Tally Briggs in Los Angeles is checking airline schedules.
Marc Perkel (D-Framed) from San Francisco is coming.
Perkel defensive coordinator Michele the BartCook
is coming from Portland.
Southwest Airlines is doing their
"friends fly free" program, and they fly
to Baltimore,
so that means airfare has dropped in half if
you're trying to get to Juliefest
2002!
If the West Coast Sweeps you East Coast people will need to step up.
You can still get in for a mere $50, ...but tick tock...
Don't forget to check 
How's your basketball team doing?
Christian right attacks Bush's secrecy
How about some hemp panties?
.............................................
click to order Buy 3, get free shipping
...
Hi,
I'm Ken Starr and I'm going to prison with Robert Ray.
You
see, we lied and lied about Kathleen Willey being credible,
and
when Ray released the final report, he clearly stated that we
were
unable to rely on her testimony because she was a big liar.
So
why did we terrorize Julie Hiatt Steele for four years?
Why
did we have our goons call her sister and threaten her?
Why
did we look into little Adam's adoption?
Part
of it is because we're partisan bastards who hate Bill Clinton
and
Julie got in the way of our destroy-Clinton project, so we had to
scare
her into playing ball but dammit, ...she just wouldn't scare.
So
now we've been caught obstructing justice and tampering with
witnesses
and suborning perjury and we're totally screwed.
Bart's
going to do this to me and I can't blame him.
I'm
a guilty bastard and I belong in prison.
Please
God, don't let him use the BartCop chainsaw on me."
...
Update
"Legal" has asked to see the hotel contract before we sign it,
so we may not officially book the room until Tuesday or Wednesday,
Only one days left to get Juliefest2002
tickets for just $50
If your snail mail is postmarked the 20th, that'll be OK.
But if you want the fancy appetizers, $75
is your price
C'mon, meeting Julie is worth more like $300.
Paying $100
is a bargain, paying $75
is a steal.
so paying just $50
is downright ridiculous.
Tune in tomorrow for our special Saturday edition when we'll have
two special treats.
1. We're going to expose a Christian hypocrite.
And when I say "expose,"
I don't mean with facts & figures - nooooo.
I think we might even call this feature "Laura
II," except her name is "Christine"
and she works for Brent Bozell over at Christian
News Service.
2. The story of the Screaming Eagles, but it's not what you think.
Plus, we plan to catch up on the mail
and the donation list.
Shopping
online?
Use the portal below and they'll throw bartcop.com
a nickel and
it costs you nothing more than whatever you
were going to pay.
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2002,
bartcop.com
Shirley Manson -
contact bartcop.com
