Fair & balanced 
POLITICS - HUMOR -
FINE TEQUILA - OUTRAGE
|
||||
|
|
||||
|
|
PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com .Support Bartcop.com PO Box 54466.... Tulsa, OK 74155 |
|
Links Contact Us Project 60 Demo Underground JFK Conspiracy BC Entertainment BartCop Sports MediaWhoresOnline Chat & Post BartCop Reader The Vegas Report New to BartCop? BartCop Books Online Journal Bart Cook Your Ad Here BC Astrologer BartCop Store Buzzflash Joe Conason Gene Lyons Julie Hiatt Steele |
|
click
Quotes
"Watergate was exposed by the CIA’s main newspaper
in America, The Washington Post.
One of the two journalists who investigated
the scandal, Robert Woodward, had only recently
become a journalist. Previously Woodward
had worked as a Naval intelligence liaison to the
White House, privy to some of the nation’s
highest secrets. He would later write a sympathetic
portrait of CIA Director Bill Casey
in a book entitled Veil: The Secret Wars of the CIA.
It was Woodward who personally knew and
interviewed "Deep Throat," the unnamed source
who revealed inside information on Nixon’s
activities. Many Watergate researchers consider
one of Woodward’s old intelligence contacts
to be a prime candidate for Deep Throat. "
--Steve Kangas, who died in Richard Mellon Scaife's building from a "self-inflicted"
gunshot wound
and then became the victim of a Scaife-financed smear
Suicide Blast Kills 6 More in Jerusalem
Excerpt
A suicide bomber blew herself up
at a bus stop in a Jerusalem's market Friday,
killing six people and wounding at least
84. The attack came while Colin Powell
was trying to arrange an end to Israeli-Palestinian
violence.
To all those people who screamed "traitor" and "coward" at me
for that
screaming eagles story - we have at least ninety casualties -
just in one day.
A year after I first published that story, I'll bet I could populate
an entire Oklahoma
town with the people who were not killed or wounded in
the last 365 days.
They could live their lives, with all their friends and relatives
in dusty Oklahoma,
but they love that certain patch of sand more than they want
to see their kids grow up.
Stroke Me, Stroke Me
"The myth of the vanishing rain forest
is just that - a myth.
The rain forest isn't disappearing,
...it never was, ...never has."
-- the vulgar Pigboy, third hour yesterday
Of course, this might not be a by-product of a stroke.
It may just be a bald-faced Pigboy lie.
We
still have tickets
Being of slow wit, I've always found it advantageous to build
in some extra buffer.
I expected the prep for Juliefest
to be a madhouse, and that it would take two weeks
minimum to straighten things out, but Christian is such a Koresh-send,
we're all caught up.
Things seem to be working remarkably smoothly. She not only has
a brain but she can
organize and prioritize and all that good stuff and best of all,
she doesn't flap.
We still need some buffer, so we can't sell tickets up till the
last second,
but we still have some tickets because James C gave us a little
extra room
and each ticket sold is more foundation and security of Julie,
...so
let's party!
This is going to be one of those nights that, ten years from now,
everybody
will claim
they were at the big Juliefest celebration at Carville's place,
but they'll be lying.
Only the cool people will have been to Juliefest2002-DC
It's not tax deductible, but what the hell, claim it anyway.
Let's party!
Question:
Remember the Telex that George Herbert Herbert Bush sent to Saddam
that said,
"The United States will not interfere
in your affairs?"
Why doesn't the young Bush boy send a Telex like that to Ariel Sharon?
Why do we expect every nation to help us find the bad guys,
then tell Israel not to take aggressive action against suicide
bombers?
New toon from Tom Tomorrow
Subject: Will they subpeona BartCop?
Dig this man--the number of subpoenas has
risen to extraordinary numbers
under patriot/homeland security--and EVERYONE
is a SUSPECT!
Gully
In the Name of Homeland Security,
Telecom
Firms Are Deluged With Subpoenas
Excerpt:
Operating under new powers to combat terrorism,
law enforcement agencies
are making unprecedented demands on the
telecommunications industry to
provide information on subscribers, company
attorneys say.
These companies and Internet service providers
face an escalating barrage
of subpoenas for subscriber lists, personal
credit reports, financial information,
routing patterns that reveal individual
computer use, even customer photographs.
I'm so clean it's disgusting. All my "crimes" are right
on this page.
I don't care what the government knows about me. I got out of
the child sex slave
business years ago, and my heroin smuggling is down to almost
nothing these days.
There could never be a "True Hollywood Story" or "Behind the
Scenes" on me
because it would be more boring than Senate hearings on writing
new tax laws.
Damn, he beat me to it...
I was going to write a thing about The
Bush Doctrine, the newest horseshit
phrase
that's on everybody's lips these days in Washington. If there
even is such a silly-named thing,
I'll bet a bottle of Chinaco that The Chimp can't
explain it unless Cheney writes it down for him.
Besides, as far as anyone can tell, the Bush Doctrine means Skippy
plays his Gameboy
while the Middle East burns itself to the ground, but I wonder
how John Monty sees it?
Dickin' with the Doctrine
Excerpt:
George chose not to get personally involved
in the peace process between Israel and Yassir Arafat's
Palestine Liberation Organization solely
because Bill did get personally involved. If there is a Bush
Doctrine, it is "Whatever Bill Clinton
did, do the opposite." That's it. The only reason.
Reminder:
click
See this thing here?
It's a 2-D wood carving-deal that unfolds into a 3-D wooden basket.
There's a bunch of them if you click on that link.
It's really kinda cool. Makes a helluva Mother's Day gift
if you're stumped for a gift.
Mrs. BartCop loves these things and she's extra-hard to
make happy.
Koresh, fill that basket with South's
Finest Chocolate and you're the King.
...and when you run out of chocolate, you can hang it on the wall as a 2-D.
Boston Cardinal Says He Won't Quit
Amid growing demands that he step down because
of the sex scandal,
Cardinal Bernard Law said Friday that he
will continue serving the
Boston Archdiocese "as long as God gives
me the opportunity."
So, the Cardinal will stay "as long as God wants him to?"
This reminds me of a Tulsa joke from 1976, when we first arrived.
How does Oral Roberts decide what percentage of his millions
of dollars
to keep each month and what percentage to give to the poor?
He throws it all into the air and says, "Take
what you need, Lord,"
and then he spends whatever God allows to fall to the floor.
IF
the Cardinal helped to hide the guilty, he's a co-conspirator to repeat
felonies.
IF
he let this happen, again and again to helpless children, he's gotta do
time.
The Willster sent this...
Six inches of limestone,
eight inches of brick,
ten inches of concrete.
Subject: more for the George W. list
These weren't on the list you had of the Boy King's accomplishments:
77. Directed the FBI And CIA to "back off" their
investigation of the bin Laden family.
78. Sent $43 million to the Taliban less than
six months before the September 11 terrorist attack.
79. Reneged on a campaign promise to prohibit
storage of additional radioactive waste at the
Yucca Mountain facility,
calling for an additional 77,000 metric tons of high-level nuclear waste
to be transferred
to the site. (That promise delivered Nevada's four electoral votes and
- with the assistance
of the Supreme Court - the presidency.)
80. Promised $20 billion to assist New York City
with cleanup, relief and rebuilding efforts
and later shorted
the city $9 billion, lowering that number to $11 billion.
Added to the yearonebush.htm list
Capital Gang was interesting...
Everyone agreed, even Novak and Snaggletooth, that Bush is a rudderless
idiot
who has no Mideast Policy and if he does, nobody understands
what the hell it is.
It's rare that all five agree on anything.
But they did it again in the next segment, that the Boston Cardinal
is a goner.
The Cardinal issued some half-denial, half-admission that perhaps
they were
"too focused" on individual pedos and failed to look at the greater
picture.
That sounds like, "I was too focused on the bank's money
to realize it was wrong for me to break in and steal it."
...and this guy speaks for every Catholic in Massachusetts?
They keep SAYING they want to clean up this mess, but you don't
do that by having the guilty say, "by-gones" and "Let's get on
with life."
Also, they said, according to Ari the Honest, the Smirking White
House has
washed their hands of the Powell trip, saying he's on his own.
This way, when Powell comes back empty-handed, the young Bush
boy
can skate free of all responsibility AGAIN!
Think how that makes Powell feel. He's on the diplomatic
mission of his life
and his boss is acting like he's some Ollie-north loose-cannon
bungler,
...of course, the press and the Democrats will let him get away
with it,
because The Chimp is never responsible for anything that goes
wrong.
There's always something good at 
Details at
Quotes
"You don't know what you'll do
until you're put under pressure,
...across 110th street was a
helluva tester,"
-- Bobby Womack's "Across 110th Street," from "Jackie
Brown"
and, more recently, the Juliefest
2002-DC soundtrack(more
on that later)
You know what else is a helluva tester?
Having the weight of the entire goddamn United States government
come down hard on you.
- watching your house 24 hours a day, tracking your every move
- following you when you go to the store or pick up your son
from school
- tapping your phone, tracing each call, tracking down each person
and investigating them
- having your own bank try to entrap you into a crime so they
could use it against you
- having a million dollar legal bill dumped on you, forcing you
out of your comfortable home
- having the whore press paint you as a criminal when all you
did was tell the truth
- having goons call your sister in Florida and threatening her
to get you to play ball
Sidebar:
Hey, Kennyboy - how'd that goon
get Julie's sister's number?
He got if from you,
didn't he, you son of a bitch!
Who else had that number,
Kennyboy, only her phone tappers, you guilty slut.
Julie stood up to everything
you and the federal government could throw at her so you
contracted outside for some fascist
goons, and you tell people you're a religious man?
You're a cowardly fraud who got
beat by a woman, you motherless bastard.
- teaming up with a known liar to discredit your name and reputation
- investigating your son's adoption, suggesting he might be taken
from you
- forcing you into a cocoon of isolation so you don't entrap
your neighbors, friends and family
- years of endless legal entanglements, briefs, proffers, motions
and discovery meetings
- forcing you to become dependent on others, something that you'd
almost die to avoid
but when you have a little boy who depends
on you, sacrifices have to be made.
- the broken leg and busted knee wasn't Ken Starr's fault, but
it added to the pressure.
- what else?
Oh, yeah, rotting in prison for forty years
Remember November and December of 2000, when the lawless Republicans
stole the election?
Remember how hard they fought to steal control of the White House
and our lives?
That's how hard they went after Julie Hiatt Steele, and she was
all alone in that fight.
In less than two weeks, we're going to meet the hero who withstood
that presssure, and she
came out of it with more class, humor and dignity than I thought
I've ever see in anybody,
much less in someone walking out of hell to reclaim a small piece
of her life.
You can meet her, too.
Don't miss this chance to celebrate her victory.
April 27th at James Carville's West24
Click Here to get your tickets to Juliefest 2002-DC
I'm sure things were tough in Bobby Womack's world,
but I doubt he knows what real pressure is.
Meet the Press
Tim the Tiger was so tough on Condi Rice, I couldn't believe it.
Russert: Will Powell come back with a peace agreement?
Rice: He's there to deliver a very strong message.
Russert: Oh, OK, let's move on...
Since the suicide bombers say they get their orders directly
from Arafat how can you maintain that Arafat is a man of peace?
Rice: Terrorism must stop.
Russert: Oh, OK, let's move on...
Will this president bring peace to the Middle East?
Rice: Tim, this conflict is decades old...
Russert: Well, thanks for sitting
in the hot seat, Condi!
Three years ago, when the topic was the president's penis, Russert
grabbed on with both hands and
refused let the administration get away with any non-answers,
as tho anyone had information about
the president's penis besides the president. But now that the
topic is merely world stability, Russert
turns into Mr. Marshmallow. He is clearly the house
organ of the Weak & Stupid administration.
Since Ari and Tim have essentially the same job, explaining away
Bush's bumbling
why is Russert getting millions each year and Fleischer only
gets $80K?
Would you like to be a sponsor of Juliefest2002?
Here's how that works - security is going to cost Julie $360.
But if YOU wanted to sponsor Julie's security detail, you would
get a nice
personal note (not an e-mail) from Julie that would probably
say something like,
"Thank you, (your name here) for seeing
to my safety on my big night."
that would be worth framing and hanging in your
den or on your desk at work.
People would constantly be saying, "How
do you know Julie Hiatt Steele?"
There are also various transportation costs
(not mine) for this event.
Would you like to be a $300
transportation sponsor?
We're going to have flowers for Julie (maybe
$100) and a giant cake $80....(thanks
Nick)
The pro photographer is probably $200...(thanks
Marg Matt)
Douglas E has sent a $300sponsorship/expense
package.
If you'd like to sponsor some costs for
Juliefest, which mean more money
in Julie's pocket, write to us at juliefest2002@yahoo.com
We have more tickets - tell a friend!
PayPal your $100 per ticket to
bartcop@bartcop.com
or snail mail checks/MOs (do it soon) to bartcop.com
at PO Box 54466, Tulsa, OK 74155
Quotes
"I'm tired of this right-wing side sidewind.
I've had it. America's economy is
suffering unnecessarily. Important
American values are being trampled.
Special interests are calling the shots,
and it sometimes seems as if,
in the words of the poet, 'The best
lack all conviction and the worst are
full of passionate intensity.' If you
agree with me, then stand up with
conviction for what we believe in and
fight for it."."
-- Al Gore speaking out yesterday, eighteen months
too late, in Florida
Thanks, Al.
This isn't something we planned to do, or wanted to do, but we're
in a situation
where expenses are at an all-time high and treehouse donations
are at a low,
so I thought I'd make this OFFER to see if anyone was interested.
10 cents a minute.
No, it's not the greatest deal on Earth, but I've seen big companies
brag about
17 cents a minutes, and ten is less than 17, right?
If you use AT&T, Sprint or MCI, check your phone bill. Swear
to Koresh,
sometimes you're paying THIRTY cents a minute for long distance.
Funny how Ol' Bart could offer you a dime a minute and the big
boys charge 30 cents.
You travelers - if you're ever in a hotel and call long distance,
you could be paying
up to a dollar a minute with hotel charges. If you use
a pay phone at a truck stop,
you could be paying three dollars a minute - trust me
- I've been there.
The cards are good ANYTIME - none of this nights & weekends
crappola.
The only bad news is if you're at some truck stop or hotel, they'll
charge you three or
six minutes worth of time for the call, but you're saving 1-3
dollars a minute if that happens.
The cards are good forever, too - they don't expire.
Here's how it works:
You PayPal or snail mail me $100, and I'll e-mail you a 800 number
and
a code that enables you to have one thousand minutes of
long distance.
My good math tells me that just a dime a minute - that 's
cheap!
and you don't have to listen to Carrottop make his pitch, either
Maybe this will be a successful fund-raising idea, maybe not,
but lately we've negelected to be
sufficiently selfish and expenses are piling up, so if you're
paying MORE than a dime a minute
(you are) you might consider getting in. Even you people
with "free" long distance on your
cell phones - you signed up for the $40 plan but your bill is
always $75-100, right?
If you want in, PayPal me at bartcop@bartcop.com
or snail mail $100 to
PO Box 54466, Tulsa, OK 74155 and put "Cheap long distance"
on your money order.
I'll e-mail you the phone number and a private code good for
1000 minutes.
Ma Bell is a greedy mother - I'll treat you better.
Make bartcop.com your long distance carrier.
You save money and the treehouse gets a nickle - that's
cool.
Days EIGHT & NINE of Bush engaging the Middle East problem
Sharon
Defies Bush
US President seen as weak and stupid
The Bush boy: Withdraw immediately!
Sharon: Go away, boy, you bother me...
Today in History
In 1828, the first edition of Noah Webster's American Dictionary
was published,
and Rush Limbaugh denounced it as "being full of lies and distortions
in an attempt
to fool young skulls full of mush that liberal means "not
bigoted" and conservative
means "adhering to the past."
In 1986, Americans got first word of a U.S. air raid on
Libya where Ronald Reagan
was successful in killing the young daughter of Moahmar Ghadafi
which would make
Reagan a terrorist so I wish history would stop lying about that
raid.
One year ago: The 24 crew members of the U.S. spy plane
landed at their home base
after President Weak and Stupid got on his knees and begged China
for mercy so the
long term plans with Uncle Prescott and the Bush Family Evil
Empire wouldn't be hurt.
The Crew was greeted by thousands of friends and family but not
Governor Bush because,
the White House claimed, "he didn't want to hog the spotlight,"
the liars. He loved hogging it
at the Olympics, and at the World Series and the Super Bowl,
but when the occasion is military,
our Failure in Thief can be counted on to go A.W.O.L.
This is not news
US
jobless claims hit highest level in 19 years
With a Republican in the White House, you always get war and recession.
Feedback
You published:
>"Hitting a 70-yard-wide building with a 52-yard-wide Boeing 767
> at 500 miles per hour requires virtually instantaneous reflexive
> response time-a lightening-quick three-tenths of a second."
Horse manure, Bart! We're talking about
a plane being flown at a big-ass
building with plenty of time to constantly check
and recheck its headings.
The problem of terrorism is bad enough without
nuts like Rall and Al Martin
irresponsibly mouthing off. How are
they any worse than Rush mumbling,
"Well, it's just a theory" after 2 solid hours
of Clinton-raped-Girl-Scouts rhetoric?
SY
S,
Ted Rall, Tom T, Doonesbury and Boondocks are the Big Four net
toonists.
I thought it was newsworthy that Rall would say that.
Does this mean you totally reject the Pearl Harbor theory?
That Bush allowed this to happen to get into the Big war?
I'm not saying I believe it, but Bush has asked that it not be
investigated,
(and of course, the Dems agree) which is a little strange, no?
Shopping
online?
Use the portal below and they'll throw bartcop.com
a nickel and
it costs you nothing more than whatever you
were going to pay.
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2002,
bartcop.com
Shirley Manson - contact
bartcop.com
