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Quotes
"We're closely monitoring it. This is a --
any strike's a tough situation, but this one
happens to come at a -- or a
lockout is a tough situation, or no work is a tough situation."
-- Never worked a day in his
life Pinhead, in D.C., Oct. 1, 2002
Subject: Cross-Section of America
Bart,
Here is a picture of protesters in Oregon
this weekend. Notice some of the older people
in the protest (like the old lady in the
red hat and others in the picture).
For reference, I am also including
the link to the article where the picture came from.
They said that "over 5,000 people protested
in Portland, Oregon" Saturday (October 5).
ps: I hope you are rested -- you have a lot to report on this week.
Bob R.
Poll: Bush Should Wait on Iraq
Excerpt:
A solid majority of Americans believe Bush
should give U.N. weapons inspectors
time to act and should wait for support
from allies before invading Iraq, a new poll says.
The CBS-New York Times poll out Sunday also
found a growing number of people
want Bush to get congressional approval
before going to war, with many saying Congress
has not asked enough questions about Bush's
policy toward Iraq.
That Iraqi
oil belongs to me!
Subject: Back Yet?
OK, so it's the 6th.
10 days since the page has been
updated.
Hope you had fun playing in Vegas while the resident was busy burning Rome.
Michael T
Mike,
I apologize for taking a break.
I'm ashamed of myself.
No
Retreat, No Surrender
by William Rivers Pitt
Excerpt:
George W. Bush is coming to Boston on October
4th to hobnob with Mitt Romney, and to stand
for pictures with devotees of the GOP who
were willing to cough up $5,000 for the privilege of a
photo-op with The Great Man. The love-in
would be happening at the Seaport Hotel, out on the
piers along the harbor. Bring signs, bring
flyers, bring your best shouting shoes, and meet on the bridge.
We march on the hotel before noon. The
purpose of the protest: To try and stop this coming war in Iraq.
Did you know...?
If you had $117,000 in your IRA the day Scalia
stole our votes,
you only have about $75,000 left, if your
account is average
That missing $42,000?
Bush f-ing stole that from you and he stole it from me.
Bush stole roughly $40,000 from every family in the
nation, and he's just getting started.
Doesn't anybody else worry about that?
Washington
Press Shows Caste Superiority
by Gene Lyons
Excerpt:
Now me, I had two reactions to Junior's
remarks. First, anger. There are laws
against saying exactly what I actually
thought, but suffice it to say I'd have loved
to see somebody smack his smirking face
with a banana cream pie. Second, grim satisfaction.
Bush had finally let his arrogant condescension
show in the plainest possible way.
If Democrats had any sense, they'd make
him pay.
Mr.
Lyons! That's wrong!
Mr
Rove wouldn't like it if we fought back.
Quotes
"This is a man who continues to murder his
own people, a man who has gassed -- used gas
on his own citizens, a man who
has used chemical weapons on his neighbors, a man who has
invaded two countries, a man
which hates -- who hates America, a man who loves to link up
with al Qaeda, a man who is a
true threat to America, to Israel, to anybody in the neighborhood."
-- Too stupid
to be president, Arizona, Sep. 28, 2002
What a quote!
Here is a man who put to death hundreds of his own people
(Texans).
He used a needle instead of gas, but that distinction means little
to the families of his victims.
When he's done with Iraq, Bush will have invaded two countries.
He governs like he hates Americans, stealing $40,000 from every
American family.
He and his father have both linked up with Al Qaeda, even arming
them.
He is the biggest threat to America in our lifetime.
He's the biggest threat to every country on Earth.
No wonder Bush opposes a World Court.
Sports Round-Up
The Rams lost again, that's bad.
The Cardinals swept their playoff games, that's good.
Oklahoma and Texas both won, setting up the clash of undefeateds
this Saturday.
In Oklahoma, all they want to do is beat Texas.
They'd gladly lose every other game this year if it meant beating
Texas.
"When I see burnt orange, I just wanna
puke."
-- Brian Bosworth
...and the Cowboys lost, so it was a good weekend.
Funny, while packing for the trip out west,
I found a small envelope in my bag.
(I haven't used the bag since we went to
Washington in April.)
Inside the envelope was a hundred dollar
bill for Julie from Karen S.
Don't worry, Karen, I'll get that to her.
BTW, has anybody heard from Julie?
Anyone have a current address for her?
Quotes
"America must remember that tragic story, because
it speaks volumes about
the great spirit of the country. People
flying across the plane, 40 passengers
and I think four crew members, I believe
it was."
-- President Moron, Phoenix, Sep. 28, 2002
"...flying across the plane?"
Oh God, what did we do to make you so angry?
Protest in Houston
I see where Bad Vlad Putin has pulled a
page from Dim Bastard's book.
Those pesky Chechnyan rebels have now become
"miliant Islamic fundamentalists."
That way, Putin can secretly wipe them out without having to explain himself.
...just like his soul-mate Pinhead!
And you know Bush made Putin a deal - "I
won't bother you about Chechnya
if you back my takeover of the Iraqi
oil fields."
Media
Co. Accuses Rep. Dick Armey
Armey the foul-mouthed Dick does it again
Excerpt:
The parent company of The Dallas Morning
Whore accused Dick Armey of trying
to retaliate against the newspaper for
its coverage of his son's failed congressional bid.
The newspaper said the foul-mouthed Dick
tried to have language inserted into military
appropriations bill to force Belo Corp.
to divest itself of one of its three Dallas media properties.
Weird Sex
Janice Soprano is the queen of weird sex.
The last time we saw her having sex, mob
boss Richie Aprile was taking her from behind
and he was "playfully" holding a gun to
her head. Janice told Carmela about it, and when
Carmela gasped in shock, Janice said, "Don't
worry, he usually takes the clip out."
Hey, Janice, guess what? Revolvers
don't have clips.
OK, so Janice later murdered Richie for
teasing her.
Then last week, (not last night) we see
Janice and her new boyfriend, mob boss Ralphie Pants in bed,
and Janice is behind him this time - working
a vibrator in and out of Ralphie while telling him what a disgusting
slut and whore he is."How
much money did you bring home for me, you cheap ho?"
Ralphie was getting off on it, and then his phone rings - to the tune of "Rocky."
It may have been the funniest moment in Soprano history
Flags in Nebraska are flying at half-staff
While I was "playing in Las Vegas," I saw
that numb-nutted shoe-bomber Richard Reid pled guilty.
This follows John Walker Lindh pleading
guilty.
I predict Moussawi won't have a trial,
either.
Are these defense attorney's doing their
jobs?
Or are they working for Bush to keep
these men from going to trial?
If they went to trial, Bush might have to
explain what he's been doing with the TRILLIONS
that are missing from Social Security.
Worse than that, what would the Illegal Usurper do
if they went to trial and were found not
guilty?
The NY Whore Times says last week the stock market just had its worst dive since 1987.
Who was president in 1987? Von Reagan.
The Dow is now where Clinton had it in 1995, at 7500.
When they say "The
stock market works in cycles," tell them
"Yes, it does, it goes up under Democrats
and goes down under Republicans."
It's a fact.
Bush
threatens veto over pension benefit
AWOL bastard dumps on retired military heroes
Alarmed by the cost of expanding military
entitlement programs, Bush has threatened
to veto the entire $355 billion defense
authorization bill for the new fiscal year if House
and Senate conferees do not eliminate new
pension benefits for disabled military
retirees that could cost $18.5 billion
to $58 billion over the next decade.
The Pentagon now spends more than $35 billion
a year on military pension and health-care
entitlements that are among the most generous
in the country for public or private-sector employees.
The pension provision at issue would for
the first time allow military retirees to collect retirement
benefits from the Pentagon and disability
benefits from the Veterans Administration at the same time.
Conferees could decide the issue this week.
Remember - at every campaign stop, Bush promised veterans, "Help
is on the way."
But then, he promised he'd get bin Laden, too.
He also took an oath, years ago, to serve his country - then
went AWOL.
Yet the military loves
this rich little snot-nosed, back-stabbing, gone-AWOL liar.
They would die for him, while he's busy emptying out the Treasury.
"...and the eraserheads believed you!"
Texas
Hold 'Em With A Stacked Deck
by Harley Sorensen
Excerpt:
I'd like to play poker with George W. Bush.
I'd get rich.
Any poker player worth his salt knows you always
call when the other guy is bluffing.
If he's bluffing, and you're holding any
cards at all, you've got him beat. You can't lose.
So how does George W. Bush respond to a
bluff? He throws in his cards!
Pretty dumb, eh? .
Bartfest revisited
The Rio wasn't my friend last weekend.
Everyone I knew at The Rio was already in their rooms relaxing,
but they couldn't get
my room-with-a-view-of-the-Rio-garage ready until 4 PM,
and it was 4:30 before we
got our luggage delivered and we had a mass tequila tasting to
host before 6 PM.
Larry the Tooth offered to drive us to the Hard Rock, but we were
so late he had to go
without us to meet his friend, so we met up with Isaac Peterson,
(MN) Rude^Boyee (MN)
and The Colemeister (AR) and the five of us got a ride from a
crusty cabbie.
By the time we got to the Hard Rock, the Pink Taco was already
full and there were
Bartcoppers (we still need a better name for that group) scattered
everywhere.
One of the best things that happened all week was meeting the
Forum's Pat-LV.
At the last second, Christian couldn't come, and Pat-LV stepped
up and ran with the ball.
She brought name tags and pens and stuff so we could find and
identify each other.
(Before I forget, she was also a Koresh-send
the next night, putting up signs and getting
more name tags together and helping to
check people and dollar amounts at the door.
She really saved the weekend - thank you
Pat!!)
So we tanked up pretty good at the Pink Taco. Larry and I had
the good sense to split
a $30 shot of Herradura Selecion Suprema, which we both
agreed wasn't as tasty as
The Miracle at Canaan, and at the Pink Taco, Canaan only
costs $6 a shot.
You gotta love a place that sells luxury tequila that cheap.
So after 90 minutes of appetizers and drinks, we boarded the bus.
I knew something was wrong right away because we couldn't find
Isaac.
Sidebar:
This must be an old picture of him, because
he looked very different in Vegas.
I'm sure he'll be embarrassed as hell when
he reads this, but Isaac has this smooth,
James Bond thing going. He was dressed
to kill, and his voice was laid back and soothing.
If I was gay, I would've been following
him around all weekend. You ladies who missed
meeting him should be kicking yourselves.
He's one smooth dude.
So - we can't find Isaac, and we couldn't
leave without him, so I left the packed bus
and headed back into the casino. I looked
and looked and couldn't find him, so I headed
back towards the bus and they told me Isaac
had been found.
Now, you want to know how smooth he is?
He was the last guy to leave the long, slender
table that held the most Bartcoppers, and
the Pink Taco put the big bag on him.
As he was leaving, they said, "Sir,
you owe us $250 on your table's bill."
Isaac quietly paid them.
If that'd been me, I would've screamed and
complained and set my hair on fire,
but Isaac just quietly paid them and we had to drag the story
out of him, later.
Sidebar:
If you were at the long, slender table
and think you might've not paid your fair share,
consider sending something to Isaac or
to me and I'll forward it to him. Also, it's possible the
waitress had the best night of her young
career. She double-billed us an extra $70 at our small table.
I pointed out to her that we'd already
paid cash for that $30 Herradura shot and she billed us for it again,
so I only lost $45 on her bill-padding,
but Isaac got the full screwing from the Pink Taco.
Someone suggested their might have been
a misunderstanding - that people might've ordered
fajitas and tequila, thinking they were
part of the $58 weekend package of food and drink.
I thought Isaac was a smooth dude before
he took the $250 hit.
Hats off to Isaac.
The bus ride was fun, (especially with chat's "Palmer" handing
me his flask of Gran Centenario Anejo.
That's some tasty stuff. I'll have to A-B it with some Canaan
to give it a real test.
How can I do that, you ask? That wacky Palmer gifted me
with a bottle to take home!
Woo Hoo!
But the flaw in the plan was after everyone got loopy, nobody
looked out the windows.
There was such a multi-gaggle of conversation going on, we could've
just stayed at
the Pink Taco and applied that bus expense towards the bill.
After the bus ride, we split up and prepared ourselves for the big party tomorrow.
...and nobody asked to see my shoes!
More Tomorrow
Click for
more
Crazy Vic strikes again
To welcome me back, he brought in another hueueueueeuge feast.
Mexican Chicken Casserole,
which is too good for words, and some wacky salsa with tiny pinto
beans, tomatoes, cilantro
and whatever, which was to die for.
Of course, this doesn't make up for him being a racist Republican
pig,
but if I have to share an office with a racist pig, it's nice
that he cooks.
Is The President Nuts?
Diagnosing
George W. Bush
by Carole Wolman, MD
Excerpt:
Many people, inside and especially outside
this country, believe that the American president is nuts,
and is taking the world on a suicidal path.
As a board-certified psychiatrist, I feel it's my duty to
share my understanding of his psychopathology.
Click for more
The Turning of the Tide
click
Does Molly Ivins read bartcop.com?
"The most commonly asked political question
in America today is,
"Where the hell are the Democrats?"
The answer is they're also corrupted
by campaign financing, but since they
are the only ones likely to do anything
about this mess, I suggest the
gutless wonders that pass for an opposition party
in Washington get up off their fat
duffs and get to work."
The Democrats are quieter than a mouse peeing on cotton.
Quotes
"I've gained so much weight, I can't wear my
wedding ring."
-- Al Gore, making international
news again
Hey, Mr. President - have you considered having a jeweler re-size
your ring?
Fox News and the vulgar Pigboy had a field day with your brainless
comment.
Quotes
"These are folks that have hijacked a great
religion and then take innocent life.
And that's a huge difference between
America."
-- Dubya, Denver,
Sep. 27, 2002
The Pieman
Quotes
"We're allowing our forests to grow up like
giant piles of kindling,
and just hoping that something doesn't
happen. We're -- backwards policy."
--Dubya, Denver, Colorado
Sep. 27, 2002
Bush is right on this one.
If he lets his contributors cut down all the trees, they won't
ever catch fire.
Quotes
"It's not a very glamorous war from the sense
that the cables
and all the air time can cover, but
it's happening."
--Dubya, Houston,
Sept. 26, 2002
4 US Officials Describe Iraqi Involvement in OKC Bombing
Excerpt:
A Pentagon civilian official has provided
a formal affidavit stating that the Pentagon official
viewed a surveillance tape video showing
a Ryder truck and its occupants moments before
it was used to bomb the Murrah Federal
Building in OKC on April 19, 1995. The official
further states that the Pentagon official
saw in the video a Middle Eastern man closely
resembling the Iraqi and McVeigh accomplice,
Al Hussaini, exiting the Ryder truck when
it was parked in front of the Murrah Building.
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Subject: Hey Man!
You retire or something?
Joe
I'm pedaling as fast as I can.
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© 2002, bartcop.com
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