A little truth to mess up the
POLITICS-SARCASM-FINE
TEQUILA-VEGAS
|
||||
|
|
||||
|
|
PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com .Support Bartcop.com PO Box 54466....Tulsa, OK 74155 |
|
Bart Cook BartCop Sports BC Entertainment Buzzflash Daily Howler Demo U-Ground Contact us Eric Alterman |
|
Please click on our sponsors
Quotes
"I think [Powell's speech] was a comprehensive,
quite frightening
and, I think in the end, convincing
indictment."
-- Judas Maximus, fawning
over Bush's toadies again
U.S.
Economy in Worst Hiring Slump in 20 Years
20 years ago, Reagan crashed the economy just like Smirk
Excerpt:
"This is what I call the new reality," said Bob
Dutkowsky of J.D. Edwards.
"The environment we're operating in is what it's
going to be like for a while."
When they say the economy is cyclical, you should reply, "Yes,
it grows under
Democrats and the Republicans crash
it when they have power."
Travel
Alert
by Christian Livemore
Excerpt:
All that changed one evening when Adam
staked out an ATM machine in my hometown.
It was autumn, and all the leaves on the
bank’s grounds had been raked into a giant pile
by a guy from the union that rakes the
leaves. Now the leaves lay there waiting for the
guy to come along from whatever union puts
the leaves in bags.
Bush backs alien evidence
Excerpt:
George W Bush says there is mounting evidence
to suggest there is alien life on other planets.
He used his budget document to declare
that there may be "space aliens" to be discovered.
Quotes
"Courtney Love was arrested for being crazy
on a trans-Atlantic flight.
Apparently she was fighting with the
crew and they arrested her when they landed.
She said she was just filling in for
Diana Ross."
-- Dave
If you bought a CD between 1995 and 2000, you can get a $20 refund
from the crooks who fixed
the prices by going to https://webform.musiccdsettlement.com/english/forms
Housekeeping
Also known as whining
If you send in a story, you MUST
send the URL.
It doesn't help to say, "This is from
TIME, or Newsweek."
I can't print it without the URL, OK?
Viggo Mortensen (Aragorn in The Lord of the Rings)
Marty's
E! page
ABC - Michael Jackson's nose
'I still like to sleep with children' (Big surprise there, Mike)
NBC is doubling up on 'Friends' & 'Will & Grace'
CBS - season finale of 'Star Search'.
The UN covered up Picasso's 'Guernica' while Colin warmongered in
front of it
George Clooney has opinions
Kevin Spacey and Elton John at the Old Vic
Smirk's nephew, Billy Bush, is keeping up family traditions
'The Bachelor' is dis-engaged
Palm Springs's 'Bridge of Thighs'
And, this is officially 'The Year of the Blues'
click
I'm
losing patience with my neighbors, Mr Bush
by Terry Jones
Excerpt:
For some time now I've been really pissed
off with [my neighbor] Mr Johnson.
I'm sure Mr Johnson is planning something
nasty for me, but so far I haven't been
able to discover what. I've been round
to his place a few times to see what he's up to,
but he's got everything well hidden. That's
how devious he is. That's why I want to
blow up Mr Johnson's garage and kill his
wife and children. Strike first!
Quotes
"The Michael Jackson documentary from the UK
will be broadcast Thursday night.
It’s been retitled for the U.S.
It will be called "Kids Fear Factor.”
-- Leno
Bart,
What's up with you chastizing Bush for
not doing enough about Al Qaeda...
then when he speaks of the successes they've
had against the organization,
you accuse him of murder and assassination?
Do you disagree with ridding the world of
the evil that is Al Qaeda or not?
CB
I want the guilty dead, no doubt about that. Bush has no
business avenging his
father's "honor" in Iraq while his friend Osama is still alive
and directing Al Qaeda.
Also, the Smirk Administration has a dismal record at doing anything
right.
Some pictures they released of the 9-11 hijackers are of people
still alive.
When that drone killed a van full of Afghans, they said they
were ":suspected" terrorists.
Why are they murdering people on some goddamn hunch?
I forget the details, but a few weeks ago they released a picture
of "Mr Big,"
but he surfaced and did an interview and said it wasn't him.
Every few weeks Ashcroft says they killed a "really high up Al
Qaeda lieutenant,"
but how do we know that? It could be the pool boy for the higher
up - how do we know?
You're right, I don't trust a crook who stole power, who hides
his actions, who hides Reagan's
papers so we can't get the truth of Iran-Contra, who hires felons
for black bag jobs, who formed
a secret "shadow" government, who outlawed the Bill of Rights,
who laughs when he kills,
who has the brain of Reagan and the heart of Nixon. I don't trust
him one goddamn bit.
He's emptying the Treasury - that right there should get him impeached.
Help make BartCop Radio a 2003 thing, not a 2004 thing.
We gotta have some (not much) bling to make that happen.
Help Bart get some bling.
Is bartcop.com worth $5
a month?
They own the TV networks, the major papers and talk radio.
The Internet Resistance is all we have.
Click Here to get BartCop Radio sooner rather than later
'Madness of George Dubya' a UK hit
Excerpt:
British theatre-goers are flocking to a
new farce which mocks George W. Bush
as a pajama-wearing buffoon cuddling a
teddy-bear while his crazed military
chiefs order nuclear strikes on Iraq.
"The Madness of George Dubya" -- which mercilessly
satirises Blair as well as Bush
-- has proved such a success at a fringe
theatre in London that it is moving to a larger
venue next week for an extended run.
The whole world sees Bush as a dull and clueless buffoon.
Meanwhile, our fawning media lies to protect his charade.
Oh God, what did we do to anger you so?
Barry Crimmins
White House Opinion Line on Iraq War
Smirky McWarhardon has an "opinion" line for you to call.
Whether you oppose or approve of murdering Iraq, give them your
opinion.
The line only accepts calls from 9-5 EST., Monday thru Friday.
202-456-1111
A machine has you for a moment and then a live operator will
thank you for saying
"I oppose" or "I approve." It will only take minutes.
Gambling
with History
by Gene Lyons
Excerpt:
What worries many in the Pentagon nervous
about President Junior's scheme to
occupy Iraq is not knowing whether soldiers
who fled in terror during Desert Storm
will fight desperately to defend their
homes and families against foreign invaders.
From: Chris B
Subject: Plagiarism
I don't know if you know (or care), but
there's a guy at the Denver Post Online "Broncos"
discussion boards who is using your comments
without attributing you.
Example, from the "Shuttle" thread
> I heard the first shot at Clinton today, that "during the nineties"
spending for NASA didn't increase, so
> I'm sure the full-court, Clinton-is-responsible juggernaut is starting
to throttle up.
> Funny, in all the coverage I've seen on this shuttle disaster, I haven't
heard a whisper of the charge that
> the Reagan White House pressured NASA to get Challenger up on schedule
so it could be orbiting when
> Red-Ink gave that year's State of the Union Speech.
Chris, no problem.
I don't mind if people borrow, they don't even need to mention
where they got it.
...but it would be nice if they sent me tickets to watch them
shoot a few scenes.
I'd kinda like to meet Mr Sheen and Mr Sorkin.
I have a suggestion:
History should record this as "Bush's War."
If it goes good, it's Bush's war and we give him the credit for
handling a situation.
If it goes bad, then it's Bush's war and he and his White House
staff take all the blame.
But noooooooooooooooooo.
That's not what's going to happen.
Write this down:
This war is going to go bad in a lot of ways, especially the
PR war. And when it does, Bush and
his media monopoly are going to do what they always do when Bush
screws up - blame Bill Clinton.
They'll have the gall to say, "President
Bush didn't want this war, but the American people demanded it
and the Security Council gave it the
green light so he grudgingly agreed to commit US troops.
If not for Clinton, Bush wouldn't have
to be involved in this war."
Quotes
"The Vatican says that they are going to name
a Patron Saint of the Internet.
This is true, a Patron Saint of the
Internet. So far the leading contender is Saint Alyssa of Milano.
-- Conan
Susan McDougal's West Coast schedule
..
Unchained
and talking
Events:
Barnes & Noble Los Angeles on Grove
Street, THURSDAY February 6, 7:30 PM
Borders San Francisco in Union Square,
SATURDAY
February 8, 4:00 PM
Barnes & Noble in Emeryville (in the
East Bay), MONDAY February, 10, 7:00 PM
Borders Seattle on Fourth Avenue,
WEDNESDAY
February 12, 2003, 12:30 PM
Elliott Bay Books in Seattle on South Main
Street, WEDNESDAY February 12, 2003, 5:30 PM
Go and meet Susan, buy her book, get her autograph,
tell he she's a hero, and tell her "Hey" from Bart
Click Here for an excerpt from KGB
...and pigs can fly
What
caused the crash of Space Shuttle Columbia?
By Der Voron, author of book Unidentified
Flying Objects: Starcraft
Excerpt:
It was shot down by extraterrestrials.
Maybe they didn't use any weapons to crash it, but simply
approached it in their craft, causing Columbia's
electronics and engines to fail because of the effects
of the alien starcraft's electromagnetic
fields. It also may be that an alien craft had approached the
Columbia without any malicious intent,
but that its electromagnetic field's effects on Columbia's
electronics and engines were unforeseen
by the aliens.
Hi Bart
I'm temporarily in the country of the Prime
Minister under the thumb of the Unelected Idiot.
On the flight over, Virgin Atlantic had
the balls to run Michael Moore's Bowling for Columbine
-- which was fantastic. I shoulda made
the effort to see it sooner. The cartoon history of America
alone was worth the price of admission.
Also, just browsed your latest edition and
it was brilliant. When I am over here and contemplating
life as a expatriated citizen, you remind
me of the America worth coming back and fighting for.
Keep Hammerin'
Lee
Quotes
"I have made good judgements in the past.
I have made good judgements in the
future."
-- Waaaaay too stupid to be president
Excerpt
It’s all a setup for the next stage in
early 2003, when Dubya unveils a new budget with still more
enormous tax cuts. He shrugs off a record
deficit of $307 billion because he has something for everyone.
The liberals will get hydrogen cars and
AIDS assistance to Africa; the conservatives will get a defense
buildup, school vouchers and a war on Iraq,
with unspecified costs that may reach $200 billion.
"We will not deny, we will not ignore, we will
not pass along our problems to other Congresses, to other
Presidents and other generations," Dubya
promises, to loud applause. His "boldness" is widely praised.
By then, of course, Dubya, Big Time and
Boy Genius will have skipped town.
As the credits roll, they ride off into
the sunset, in their golf carts.
Quotes
"If there were no children on this Earth, if
someone announced
'All kids were dead,' I would jump off
the balcony immediately."
-- Michael Jackson
But Mike, you'd still have your ungloved hand and the memories...
Need a job? Need to hire?
Quotes
"Colin Powell addressed the United Nationsl.
They were doubtful,
skeptical and unimpressed – no wait,
...that was last night’s audience.
Powell said that the Iraqi’s were very
cunning in hiding their WMD.
He showed satellite images of a hollowed
out camel hump. They are very cunning!"
-- Dave
Shopping
online?
Use this portal and they'll
throw bartcop.com a nickel.
|
||||||
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright
© 2003, bartcop.com
Shirley
