October 18, 2001 - LOS ANGELES (APJP) -- This week (October 16th, to be exact) Rush Limbaugh
 actually called the U.S. bombing attempts during the ratings-building Clinton years "timid."

 Holy Bill Maher! I hurriedly keyed Alt-F1 on Word Perfect and my thesaurus (and best friend) brought up
 the word "cowardly." Did he mean that our military men and women were timid? Hokem smokem, that's got to
 be the end of Rush. With America in a war, sponsors will be dropping faster than Anthrax scares pop up!

 Y'gotta give the Rush-man his props. With his Peter Jennings faux-pas, and his own inability to hear what he says,
 now he'll probably have to take on a Maher-like media tour explaining what he meant. Have the Leno bookers
 gotten wind of this yet? Rush on Leno. Jay's ratings and Snapple stock will go through the roof.

 I quickly turned on FOX News for what was sure to be the "You Decide" topic of the day.
 Nothing.

 I trekked to Bill O'Reilly's no spin area. He certainly wouldn't let Rush spin his way out of this.

 Nope. O'Reilly was just responding to some mail concerning how wonderful he was.

 Checked out Brit Hume, who was angry about everything -- except for Rush's remark.
 And Tony Snow...? What a handsome kisser.

 I turned on CNN to see if those liberal media types would be asking Ari Fleischer for the President's take on
 Rush's anti-American comments. Would Ari reiterate that we should "watch what we say?"
 If the topic was broached at all I must have missed it because he was already explaining what
 the President had said about the evil-doers, whom we would smoke out and chase.

 I then went to where I could hear the truth...talk radio. Sean Hannity had yet to call for Limbaugh's neck.
 Oliver North wasn't laundering dollars to have Rush taken out.

 Hmm. Had I heard Limbaugh right? I tuned back in to the talent on "load" from God guy.
 Now Rush was just throwing out a new notion for us "to think about" -- the possibility that the Anthrax attacks
 were actually being perpetrated by those who were against a Star Wars Missile Defense.

 Omigod. It's those dern lib'ral Democrats who have been sending a pox upon...liberals and democrats!
 In that way we'll be saying that the problem is not those weapons of mass destruction that's causing the
 threat. It's envelopes of mass destruction. It's as devious as devious can be.
 Liberals attacking liberal media types like Tom Brokaw, Dan Rather and ABC infants. Democrats mailing
 the powder to Democrats Daschle and Feinstein. Willing to kill their own to make a point.

 Have liberals no soul? Have they no shame? Have they no talk radio shows?

 Now this is getting bad. Was Rush the only one who knew about this? I went to the paper of record...
 The Wall Street Journal. Paul Gigot's gotta have something on this. Nope. Just something about the
 Clinton and Lewinsky mess causing the terrorist attacks. Well, that I already knew.

 Wait a minute. The Net. There's where the facts come out...even before the truth! And there it was...
 The Drudge Report. Matt had once again scooped them all. He got it directly from Jonah Goldberg,
 who got it from his mom who got it from none other than the unemployed, and now attractive, Linda Tripp.
 The Demos were responsible? Drudge had never been wrong before, has he?

 Well, I'm writing my Congressman, the non-Democratic one, to voice my
 wrath. I'm putting another American flag on the van and puttin' out the word...

 IF YOU KNOW A LIBERAL, DON'T OPEN THE MAIL!!!