Do you own a VCR?
I hope so, because tonight is gonna make history.
Before we lose our country to religiously-insane fascist pigs,
there's so much entertainment on - you won't believe it.
First Hour of Prime Time
Just Shoot Me with special guest star Gina Gershon, loved by men and women. (cough)
Nova: Volcano Warning - A woman scorned? You should see Mother Nature when she's pissed off.
JAG - Have you seen Catherine Bell in that green bikini?
8 Simple Rules - I don't know her name, but she's why the show's a hit.
That 70's Show - Mila Kunis, is that her name? Plus, last week's show has ended.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer - TV Guide says look for "all the returning characters." Are we sweeping?
Weakest Link - Ralphie from the Sopranos loves this show.
Biography - Neil Sadaka - Oh, clear my schedule! Calendar Girl totally rules!
The Godfather Saga on Bravo - Why Al Gore invented moving pictures.
Connie Chung Tonight - no doubt with a guy who once mowed the sniper's lawn.
The E! True Hollywood Story - Ted Binion's (Owner of Vegas's
"Binion's Horseshoe') murder.
CSI did this story - gold and silver buried in the desert.
Joe vs the Volcano - The last film Tom Hanks made as a
nobody.
(Spoiler - he throws Meg Ryan in the volcano at the last minute)
The O'Reilly Factor - Nothing but the Bush-approved trooth from Fox's most successful bully.
Conspiracy Movie - starring Mel Gibson and Julie Roberts.
Half-sane internet newsletter writer thinks government wants to silence
him.
Film sinks due to the absurd and unbelievable plot.....
Secret Passages on The History Channel - Freud says "secret
passages" means female masturbation.
Further reading: See
Nancy Drew Mysteries series.
Unsolved Mysteries - How do they make Chinaco Anejo taste so f-ing good?
The X-Files - SCI-FI is running the pre-shark episodes, the great ones.
Fox Bloopers - X-Files, Married with Children etc.,
Fools Rush In - Salma destroys the movie by telling Chandler
she aborted their baby.
She was kidding, but it kinda ruined it for me...
Scary Movie 2: - They couldn't get Damon or Keenan, so they settled for Marlon.
On Deadly Ground - It's that ultra-feminine walk that separates Steven Segal from the big bucks.
Star Trek: Next Generation -"Encounter
at Farpoint", Episode #101.
On the way to a new star-base, the Enterprise meets an alien
who tries the crew for humanity's crimes.
Cast: Patrick Stewart, Jonathan Frakes, Brent Spiner, LeVar Burton,
Michael Dorn, Gates McFadden,
Marina Sirtis, Wil Wheaton. Original Airdate:
September 28, 1987.
Meet the French captain with the English accent.and his loyal
crew,
and we got to meet the amazing "Q!," one of the best TV
characters of all time.
The new Star Trek movie starts December 16th, ...maybe.
Sidebar:
This is still the first hour of
cable/satellite TV tonight.
Law & Order on TNN - Probably an Angie Harmon episode.
Last's night's was terrific!
Wow!
She told McCoy to lose the liberal crap and hang a suspect!
Friday starring Ice Cube. I missed that one.
Now we're up to the second hour
Frasier claims to have a great show, but it's hard to trust a Republican - tonight...
Hostage! - on your local PBS Channel. How the B.F.E.E. raped democracy in1980.
Smallville - This is the big one that all the kids
are watching, ...tonight "Ryan's Song,"
which sounds like a sick football player, but Ryan is a teenage
mind-reader,
(Hell, I couldn't read minds until I was 26) who protects a fellow teen
from
an evil scientist who wants to conduct "cruel" experiments on the boy.
Sounds like a get-out-the-vote-ad for the B.F.E.E.!
24 - Big spoiler, but tonite, Jack's daughter gets kidnapped by the bad guys - again!
Haunted - When he discovers Frank is investigating his
past, Simon vows to disrupt
Franks present - by "stepping into" the body of Laura's new beau.
ha ha
I'm watching that one.
Something tells me Laura's hot!
Investigative Reports - The Texas serial killer Rodney Hicks, no doubt put to death by Gov. Extra Stupid.
Larry King - probably has Bush's grade school teacher on,
telling us how smart and innovative
the young AWOLer was before he learned the family's crooked business.
Anna Nicole - She's gonna get $435M from the old, dead guy. Trust me, she's GOP.
Hannity & Colmes - If you doubt the Democratic testosterone shortage, catch Colmes.
Up in Smoke - Maybe your one chance to remain sane in a
world gone Bush.
Now we're up to the third hour
N.Y.P.D. Blue - When will Ross or Obradors take off their
tops?
. We're tired of
seeing Sipowisz's ass fulfilling ABC's nudity quotient.
Dave has Halle Berry
...and then, ...slowly, ...the bad news starts to sink in, ...like War of the Worlds.
"The Fascsists have landed in Jersey, and our
guns have no effect on them."
Keep reading bartcop.com for the best in fascists alerts.