Yesterday I made a trip to my local U.S. Post Office, where I have kept
a PO box for the past 5 years. As I was standing on line to purchase
some money orders and stamps, I noticed a bumper sticker on the wall
behind the counter. It read:

Back Off, bin Laden....I'm a Postal Worker !

And I had to wonder: What is the real message here? From what I have
observed, the postal workers seem more focused on getting American
citizens to back off, especially if they are so bold as to inquire what might
be the problem with their mail delivery service. Like why we aren't
receiving our mail...  why it arrives weeks late.....or why it's being
tampered with....why packages and envelopes have been opened by some
unknown hand prior to reaching their destination, instead of arriving
intact, to be opened by the designated recipient.

Remember that old saying....Neither rain, nor sleet, nor snow, nor dark
of night, will keep the trusty postman from his appointed rounds.... or
something like that...

Is anybody else out there having some trouble with their mail service ?
Well, as for myself, the past few weeks have really been something to
write home about. And I would, if I thought my letter stood half a
chance of being delivered.

First there was the incident in Denver, when a friend retired from
Special Forces (code name Weasel ) tried to mail me a package containing a
scanner for my computer. Weasel's package never reached it's
destination. Instead of arriving at the Woodstock Post Office, it was 'returned
to sender'... the contents decimated and destroyed. The excuse given was
'just checking for anthrax'.....

 Since I can only get to the post office about two or three times a
month, I usually find a whole batch of mail waiting for me. But last week
I opened my PO box, only to find one lonely little junk-mail circular
advertising supermarket specials. So I went up to the desk to inquire if
there might be a problem with my PO box, explaining that I was
expecting mail and packages which I had been told were already
in the mail and should certainly have arrived by now.

The lady I spoke to said she would check, and walked back into the
restricted area. But she had nothing much to tell me, only that there was
not a problem with my particular box, just that 'all mail deliveries
have been slow...you know....because of the way things are.....'

Well, yes I do know 'the way things are'.....but where's my mail ?

So yesterday I went back to the post office, one week later to check
again. I thought maybe some of the 'slow deliveries' had finally
arrived...two weeks late, but better late than never. But no dice. Still
nothing there. Since there was a different postal worker behind the desk this
time, I thought I'd try my luck and get a second opinion. As I stared
directly into the surveillance camera on the ceiling, I repeated my
question of the previous week. This time I was told that No, the mail
delivery was moving right along.... no problems he had heard of. So, I asked
hopefully, where's my mail ?

Strangely enough, he couldn't tell me. So, not wanting to hold up the
line, I saluted Big Brother via the surveillance camera and walked back
out to the lot. But I had that sinking feeling...you know what I mean.
Like maybe someone out there doesn't want me to ever get my mail. Like
I'll be waiting 'til hell freezes over ( forget about sleet snow and
dark of night ) and the trusty postman might still not complete his
appointed rounds.

 So I thought, maybe I'll just get my own bumpersticker, one which reads:

Back Off Big Brother, I'm about to Go Postal....
 
 
 

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