Avoiding political arguments with Republican relatives
may be the best way to enjoy Thanksgiving. But what's best
isn't always what's possible. In the election's
immediate aftermath -- and following a big meal and a few drinks -- your
most dearly beloved conservatives may not be
able to resist the urge to gloat. They may even begin to lecture you
about the bright future that awaits us all as
George W. Bush fulfills his "mandate."
Rather than start screaming about the bloody debacle
in Iraq, the nasty campaign against gays, or the pillaging of the
environment, just smile and nod until your favorite
'winger pauses for breath (or a bite of pie). Then say, "I hope you're
right,
of course, for everybody's sake. But have you
heard about the President's economic plans?"
As soon as you have everybody's attention, politely
explain what Bush and his administration plan to do to the gullible
middle-class voters who re-elected him. Remind
them how the President promised to make taxes "fairer" and "simpler,"
to make health care more widely available and
to cut the deficit in half.
Nod your head and say yes, you agree, the forthcoming
White House tax plan is pure simplicity. It will transfer the tax
burden from the wealthy to the workers, from
families with high earnings to those in the middle. That means creating
new
shelters for the richest taxpayers, who will
be rewarded with various schemes for tax-free savings and medical accounts.
Pretty fair, eh?
Assuming that your Republican relatives despise
Hollywood liberals, misbehaving athletes, foul-mouthed hip-hop artists,
and George Soros, it's worth pointing out that
the Bush tax scheme will greatly benefit such pampered "elitists." And
thanks
to Bush's repeal of the estate tax, the children
of those elitists may never have to pay any income taxes, let alone do
any work,
for the rest of their lives!
Of course, since the nation's accounts are already
in the tank and the President has promised that his tax "reform" won't
make
matters worse, someone has to pay the difference.
And unless your Bush-friendly family member drove to dinner in a Bentley,
that duty will fall on him or her. To offset
those generous new breaks for Soros, Barbra Streisand and Eminem, the White
House
wants to eliminate the deductibility of state
and local tax payments. For most middle-class taxpayers that will constitute
a far
larger burden than any benefit from the Bush
plan. (Urge everybody to check last year's tax return if they don't believe
you.
Have them compare the piddling interest from
their savings to the amount they deducted in state and local taxes.)
Incidentally, this clever plan will shift an even
greater burden onto the blue states, which already pay a disproportionate
amount in federal tax revenues while getting
less back. It's always good to note that those Republican red states are
America's true welfare states. And while your
listeners are still chewing over that piece of gristle, gently inform them
about the President's other plan to compensate
for the next round of regressive tax cuts. He wants to take away their
employer-sponsored health insurance.
Although he neglected to discuss any such proposal
during the presidential campaign, when he emphasized his commitment
to expand health coverage, Bush reportedly plans
to eliminate corporate deductions for health insurance coverage. With company
health plans already under tremendous pressure
from increasing costs, the elimination of deductibility will make insurance
unaffordable for most companies (and will certainly
give all employers an excuse for eliminating those benefits). That will
leave
wage and salary earners to fend for themselves
against the big private insurers. Take a generous sip of chardonnay and
say,
"What a deal!"
Finally, don't forget to mention the President's
Social Security "reform." According to the Washington Post, Bush and his
advisers have finally figured out how to pay
for the trillion-dollar cost of privatizing the system. They're just going
to ignore it
by taking the costs "off-budget." Or, as one
of the plan's proponents at the Cato Institute explained, the White House
economists will use "creative accounting" to
hide enormous holes in future budgets.
So smile again, a bit sardonically, as you sum
up what middle-class Americans, red and blue, can expect as the second
Bush regime begins: Higher taxes, exploding deficits
and the end of health coverage as we know it.
There's just so much to be thankful for, isn't there?