Volume
1131 - Tick Tock in Iraq
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Friday Aug
8, 2003
Quotes
"Gray Davis’ troubles were caused in large
measure by a conspiracy of energy companies
led by Ken Lay and blessed by Dick
Cheney. The idea that any market manipulation was
taking place was mocked as ridiculous
paranoia by Republican pundits like Charles Krauthammer
and William Safire. The recall effort
was funded by more right-wing Republican money. And the
state’s deficit is smaller, as a percentage
of its budget, than is Bush’s even though he refuses to
spend anything like what’s necessary
for homeland security — something we will all someday
regret. And what’s the result? Voters
will punish the Democrats and hand the Republicans
the most Democratic state in America.
Great."
--Eric Alterman,
Attribution
Carlyle
Group tops $1B 
Everything I said would happen, has
Click
Here
Excerpt:
Carlyle Group Inc., a private equity firm
whose senior executives include former U.S. cabinet
members and ex-President George H.W. Bush,
has turned a $180-million 1997 investment in
United Defense Industries Inc. into $1.2
billion.
Carlyle yesterday sold shares worth $270
million in United Defense, which makes the Bradley
Fighting Vehicle as well as artillery,
naval guns, missile launchers and munitions. Carlyle has sold
almost $500 million in shares of the company
in public offerings since 2001, pocketed about $350
million in dividends before the company
went public, and still owns about $350 million of stock,
according to Securities and Exchange Commission
filings..
...and all they needed was a fake war to make that billion.
Plus, this doesn't include the Iraqi oil they're stealing every
day,
it doesn't include all the Halliburton money,
it doesn't include all the black budget CIA money, and
...don't forget the Treasury is empty and we're trillions in
debt.
And it's all because the Democrats are too afraid to stand up
and say, "That's enough!"
Meanwhile, the press wants to know if Roger Clinton used his family
name to make a little money...
Quotes
"The very idea of self-government depends upon
honest and open debate as the preferred method
for pursuing the truth -- and a shared
respect for the Rule of Reason as the best way to establish
the truth. The Bush Administration
routinely shows disrespect for that whole basic process, and I
think it's partly because they feel
as if they already know the truth and aren't very curious to learn
about any facts that might contradict
it. They and the members of groups that belong to their
ideological coalition are true believers
in each other's agendas."
--Al Gore, launching
his 2000 campaign for the White House Attribution
Gov't:
Hijacker Crashed Flight 93 on 9/11
What the hell does this mean?
Click
Here
Excerpt:
U.S. investigators now believe that a hijacker
aboard United Airlines Flight 93 instructed terrorist-pilot
Ziad Jarrah to crash the jetliner into
a Pennsylvania field because of a passenger uprising in the cabin.
This theory, based on the government's analysis
of cockpit recordings, discounts the popular perception
of insurgent passengers grappling with
terrorists to seize the plane's controls.
It certainly does not!
In my opinion, it bolster's it.
Remember what happened:
Passengers aboard Flight 93 learned of
the horrors of what was happening via cell phones.
They obviously made a move to stop the
bastards, so what's the discrepancy by TED BRIDIS,
Associated Press Writer is trying to point
out?
Am I missing something huge? Either
way, the passengers caused the plane to "land early,"
to deny the sons-of-bitches the pleasure
of crashing it into the Capitol or the White House.
How does this "finding" discount anything
the passengers did?
Thanks to zendaba.com
Quotes
"What we have here is a form of looting."
--George Akerlof, 2001 Nobel Econ
winner,
describing Bush's
economic policies, Attribution
"Get
this guy, cut his tongue out and shoot him in the head...
Shoot his kids, too, and bring his wife to me..."
Secret
Talks With Iranian Sources
Just like 1980, the B.F.E.E. crimes continue
Click
Here
Excerpt:
Pentagon hardliners pressing for regime
change in Iran have held secret and unauthorized
meetings in Paris with a controversial
arms dealer who was a major figure in the Iran-contra scandal,
according to administration officials.
The officials said at least two Pentagon
officials working for Undersecretary of Defense for Policy
Douglas Feith have held "several" meetings
with Manucher Ghorbanifar, the Iranian middleman in U.S.
arms-for-hostage shipments to Iran in the
mid-1980s.
The administration officials who disclosed
the secret meetings to Newsday said the talks with Ghorbanifar
were not authorized by the White House
and appeared to be aimed at undercutting current sensitive back
channel negotiations with the Iranian regime.
Another war, this time with Iran, means:
another billion for The Carlyle
Group,
more fat, no-bid contracts
for Halliburton,
much more black budget CIA
money,
another ocean of red ink (they'll
blame Clinton)
and many more dead American
soldiers.
"I can live with that..."
Bush holds an impromptu press conference.
Barry
Crimmins
http://www.barrycrimmins.com/quips.html#8/7/03
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I wonder how we could police an A.A.R.P. discount, too?
The Social Security and "fixed income" people might like 
Have
a question, a sound file or a comment?
Email Bart bartcop@bartcop.com
Quotes
"For eight years, the Clinton-Gore Administration
gave this nation honest budget numbers;
an economic plan with integrity that
rescued the nation from debt and stagnation; honest
advocacy for the environment; real
compassion for the poor; a strengthening of our military
-- as recently proven -- and a foreign
policy whose purposes were elevated, candidly presented
and courageously pursued, in the face
of scorched-earth tactics by the opposition. That is also
a form of honor and integrity, and
not every administration in recent memory has displayed it."
--Al Gore, Attribution
Al, that's great stuff - but why didn't you say that three years
ago?
Three years ago you ran but didn't fight. Now you're fighting
but not running...
The
Clinton legacy and America
by Todd Gitlin
Click
Here
Excerpt:
"In late May 1993, a calendar called “365 Reasons
to Hate Bill Clinton” was already on sale
in right-wing bookshops. Clinton had moved
into the White House a bare four months before.
Who had already divined 365 reasons to
hate him, and why?...
For the scorched-earth right, Bill Clinton
was, if not the literal Antichrist, a close approximation:
the perjurious, adulterous doper Slick
Willie, admitted draft dodger and reputedly serial womaniser
who had opposed the Vietnam war, visited
Moscow, and married a card-carrying feminist who only
belatedly took his name and was the first
professional woman to take up First Ladyship in the White House...
Arnold's
Nazi Problem
Just like W, his dad was a Nazi, too
Click Here
Guns
I realize that no matter how well I think I've built an argument
for gun ownership,
those to my left - the "No guns, ever"
crowd - are not going to change their minds.
But let me tell you about the last few days in small town
Tulsa, Oklahoma.
Tulsa has had three
home invasions.
In two cases, they just tied up the people, maybe kicked 'em
a few times,
and then they stole them blind while they lay there, bleeding
on the floor.
In the third home invasion, they pistol-whipped a 70 year-old
man.
Plus, we have the insane convenience store murderer.
In just the last few days, he's entered three
convenience stores with a ski mask on,
demanded money, then after the clerks complied, he shot
all three in the back of the head.
Maybe there is a God, because so far only one of the three
clerks has died,
but I'd like to ask what country you "No
guns, ever" people think you live in?
When we argue guns, I usually get, "Well,
...how often does that happen?"
Well, according to the local news, we've had six of those
in the last six days.
I don't see myself working in a convenience store, so I don't
anticipate any problems there,
but if somebody kicks in the front door of BartCop Manor, I'm
reasonably confident that I have
the tools and the determination to answer all of the detective's
questions truthfully - the first time.
Without children in this equation, I fail to undertand the liberals'
willingness to be vulnerable
to every insane, escaped, nutjob, rapist/killer who found his
way out of his urine-drenched cage.
This is Clive James, noted Australian author.
He has quite a TV following in the UK and Australia
for witty and entertaining TV talk shows. Real talk and real humour.
I suspect Wal Cooper had a hand in this.
Marty's
E! page
Tons of great stuff!
click
Quotes
"I'm not, to say the least, a conventional
candidate. But these are not conventional times.
And if we keep electing the same kind
of politicians who got us into the same kind of mess
funded by the same kind of special
interests, we'll never get out of this mess.''
--Arianna Huffington
Subject: Show prep
Bart, I heard your practice show ten.
You didn't do any show prep.
Your forgot Tom Landry's name and
you forgot Vince Lombardi's name.
Tom Landry is Texas football,
and Lombardi is football, period.
Would it hurt to do in a little effortz?
Gus
Practice show number ten was done live.
Sometimes names come to me - sometimes they don't.
With Tommy Mack's help, expertise, professionalism, and encouragement,
post-production delays on Bartcop
Radio dropped by 90 percent in one weekend.
Also, and I'll probably get over this - if I prepare for a show,
I feel like I'm reading a script
and that would make me an actor of some sort and that feels
like selling out.
I'll work on that...
Bartcop
Radio Show 9-b
painfully transcribed by FreshLaundry
Click
Here
Excerpt:
Oh, I don’t like Lieberman. Don’t like
him, don’t like him. I heard Glenn Beck and O’Reilly and, oh they’re all
the same
- there’s one more. Whenever they’re praising
Joe Lieberman, you know he’s in trouble. At least he is with me! If O’Reilly
is going to talk about what a good and
decent man you are, I don’t want you anywhere near my political process;
get the
hell out of here, Joe!
Joe also guaranteed that Saddam had weapons
of mass destruction. Well, Joe, where are they? Why don’t you get over
there and show us where they are? You’ve
got the reports, you’ve got the intelligence, why don’t you show us where
they are?
You’re so certain, Joe. Backing up this
President - why would we vote for you, Joe? We’ve already got a Republican
in the
White House. We don’t need you to follow
him in there and echo every dumb-ass idea Bush ever had. What the hell’s
wrong with you?
I haven't seen any feedback on these transcripts - is it worth
it to continue?
What
is Arnold's plan to save Callie-fornia's economy?
"We will have a plan very soon, a detailed
plan, on how to face those
kind of problems and how to solve
those kind of problems."
-- the clueless Musclehead
So the question is - can Musclehead win?
Here's the answer:
If the Democrats and the press give him the Bush treatment, he'll
win.
If they bungle the debate format,
if they allow Arnold to answer "Hasta la Vista" to tough political
questions,
if they allow him to read nothing but scripts that were
written by other, smarter people - then he'll win.
Just like with President Pinhead, set up a no-rules debate - no
moderator, no audience,
no time limits on answers etc. If you do this, the smarter
candidate will always win.
Remember what Bartlet said on West Wing: "If
they're going to paint you as the guy
who's smart, then accept that and show
them what you've got."
If Gore had listened to me in 2000, he'd be president and the
DOW would be at 15000.
And if Musclehead won't debate that way, you say, "The
Terminator is a spineless coward?"
and you repeat that thousands of times until he's forced
to give im.
It's all up to the press and the Democrats.
(Arianna - talk to me - I could win this for you!)
Check today's BartCopSports!
Click to Enter
Quotes
"When the Berlin Wall fell the image of America
went up in our eyes because we had never seen it.
America was a new and promising place.
But that ideal for us has slipped in the last two years.
We thought America had high moral standards.
We don't anymore."
-- Europe,
they hate our blood-thirsty monster
Attribution
President
Codpiece Action Figure
BBI proudly introduces the latest issue in its Elite Force series
of authentic military12- inch figures,
the illegal President Pinhead in naval aviator flight uniform.
Exacting in detail and fully equipped with
authentic gear, this limited-edition action figure is a meticulous
1:6 scale recreation of the Fraud's
cock-sure swaggering during his historic Aircraft Carrier landing
while men were dying in Iraq .
Codpiece comes in large, extra-large Liddy size and super-sized
Ann Coulter sizes.
Puke here
Click
Here
I don't know if you've seen this, but it's
pretty damn sickening.
It would be funnier if it wasn't so sad.
Jay
Ashcroft's
nephew got probation after major pot bust
Although his arrest for growing 60 plants
could have landed him in federal prison,
Alex Ashcroft was tried in state court
and avoided jail -- despite his uncle's crusade
for tougher federal drug laws and mandatory
prison sentencesow
Click
Here
Excerpt:
Two nephews busted Alex Ashcroft (25) and
Adam (19).
Also busted housemate Kevin Sheely (24).
Charged with production and possession
of about 60 plants.
Growing more than 50 usually triggers federal
prosecution, but not in this case.
Brother Adam didn't live in the house, and
was never prosecuted.
Alex was prosecuted on state charges and
received probation
Sheely went before a different judge and
his records are sealed.
Alex's parents say he got even lighter
treatment.
Thanks to RJ
Confessions
of a Soviet moptop
Brezhnev and his cronies did all they could to block the
'corrupting'
influence of Beatlemania. But, says historian and closet
fan Mikhail Safanov,
the four lads from Liverpool eventually destroyed the Soviet
Union
Click
Here
Excerpt:
He did not live to see its collapse, and
could not have predicted that the Beatles would
cultivate a generation of freedom-loving
people throughout this country that covers one-sixth
of the Earth. But without that love of
freedom, the fall of totalitarianism would have been
impossible, however bankrupt economically
the communist regime may have been.
Note:
Did you know, outside of bartcop.com, The Beatles
were wildly popular, and changed the planet?
For some treason, bartcop.com readers do NOT
like The Beatles, despite the host's insistence
that they were one of the most powerful influences on modern
culture the world has ever known.
Non-dueling
Quotes
"On paper, we should be closer to the U.S.
than ever at the moment.
But the Atlantic seems wider than usual."
--British playwright Tamsin Oglesby
"In the French-American relationship, this
is the biggest crisis ever.
The French government is eager to forget
about it.... But I am more struck
by the lack of interest in America
to repair things."
--Philippe Roger, a French scholar,
Attribution
All Bush has for our former allies is a giant "Fuck
you - try and stop me!"
"Yeah,
fuck Europe. I got mine, they can get their own..."
The
Gore Speech
Click
Here
Excerpt:
"Here is the pattern that I see: the President's
mishandling of and selective use of the best evidence available
on the threat posed by Iraq is pretty much
the same as the way he intentionally distorted the best available
evidence on climate change, and rejected
the best available evidence on the threat posed to America's
economy by his tax and budget proposals.
In each case, the President seems to have
been pursuing policies chosen in advance of the facts -- policies
designed to benefit friends and supporters
-- and has used tactics that deprived the American people of any
opportunity to effectively subject his
arguments to the kind of informed scrutiny that is essential in our system
of checks and balances.
The administration has developed a highly
effective propaganda machine to imbed in the public mind mythologies
that grow out of the one central doctrine
that all of the special interests agree on, which -- in its purest form
-- is
that government is very bad and should
be done away with as much as possible -- except the parts of it that
redirect money through big contracts to
industries that have won their way into the inner circle."
Al, if only you had kept your promise to fight in 2000...the world
would be so different. Instead, you chose to
distance yourself from Clinton and be very, very polite. You
had a chance to give us four more years of peace
and prosperity, but instead, we have worldwide war, recession,
death and dismemberment.
...but at least you proved that you were your own man.
Subject: Supporting the
troops
Bart,
I'll pay for the first 10 .mils who
sign up for their first three months, or $150.
brew
thedailybrew.com
Dude, that's very generous of you.
So if any of you military guys & gays want three months of
members privileges,
send me your .mil e-mail and Brew will pick up the tab.
Quotes
“Bush 1 - I'm looking for a decent job
Clinton - Found and best job I ever
had
Bush 2 - I'm looking for a decent job
Bush is the worst president ever."
Tim
Bush's
Popularity Wanes in Slow Economy
Swackbuckling and swaggering not winning the voter's minds?
Click
Here
Excerpt:
People want President Pinhead to focus
most of his attention on the struggling economy,
says a new poll that indicates his public
support has fallen to about the level it was two years ago.
Newest poll, just minutes ago on Crossfire
asked:
Is President Bush a man you can trust?"
61 percent said "No!"
Bush's
American soldier body count in Iraq
It now stands at 255
258
Son of a bitch, and I choose my words carefully, we
lost another three yesterday.
How
many more are we willing to tolerate?
Note: Believe this figure.
It's from http://lunaville.org/warcasualties/Summary.aspx
Call the
918-493-1500
You have two minutes to rant away.
From
ChoicePoint to Diebold,
Has
Democracy Turned Her Last Trick?
by bartcop.com reader Bruno
Click Here
Excerpt:
Partisan conspiracies aside, even if there
was zero tampering involved, if an absurd, implausible result came up,
say Al Sharpton
getting 90% of the vote, we’d have little
means of tracking down the problem before it was too late(and even then
we’d have
considerable difficulties nabbing the culprit).
Suspicious activity has already marred one election, as Senator Chuck Hagel
auspiciously failed to disclose ownership
in the company that counted the ballots in his own election. Lawsuits,
petitions,
and press coverage are finally rousing
national attention to a complex and supremely important issue, but the
clock is ticking
ever closer to Election Day. By then,
like Florida, it will simply be too late.
Have a good time today - that's an order.
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Read the Previous
Issue
It had everything.
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© 2003, bartcop.com
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Call the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
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