Volume
1139 - President Notsosmart
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Tuesday Aug
19, 2003
Quotes
"When fascism comes to America, they'll call
it Democracy."
--Will Rogers, as seen on http://atrios.blogspot.com/
Blair
aide says war reasons were false
Chief of Staff: "Nothing to demonstrate an imminent threat
from Saddam"
Click
Here
Excerpt:
The dossier on which British Prime Minister
Tony Blair justified war against Iraq contained
no proof of any threat from Baghdad, according
to an e-mail from a top Blair aide.
"The document does nothing to demonstrate a threat,
let alone an imminent threat from Saddam,"
Blair's chief of staff and long-time confidant
Jonathan Powell wrote to a senior intelligence official.
"This
pisses me off and when I'm mad I kill people.
Don't forget, I can legally murder Brits, too..
The Democrats gave me that power."
Dueling
Quotes
"Frankly, what irritates me the most are these
blow-dried Napoleons that have their own agendas.
General Clark is one of them that is
running for president. He's questioning the plan and raising doubts.
I think they would serve the nation
better if they would just comment on what they see and what they know,
rather than putting their own agenda
forward as an expert."
-- Tom Delay, the little bug man
from Texas
"I'm
nuts about personal slurs..."
"Tom Delay's got it exactly backward. It's
upside down. I am saying what I believe. And I'm being drawn
into the political process because
of what I believe and what I've said about it. So it's precisely the opposite
of a man like Tom DeLay, who is only
motivated by politics and says whatever he needs to say to get the
political purpose. When our airmen
were flying over Kosovo, Tom DeLay led the House to vote not to
support their activities, when American
troops were in combat. To me, that's a real indicator of a man
who is motivated not by patriotism
or support for the troops, but for partisan political purposes."
-- Wesley Clark,
U.
Mich. Consumer Sentiment Stumbles
Click
Here
Excerpt:
U.S. consumer sentiment fell unexpectedly
in August, market sources
said on Tuesday, as Americans weigh a lukewarm
economic recovery
that has clear hot spots but has yet to
show its staying power.
Hell, I've never even heard of 'consumer sentiment' before, but
I'm not surprised
that it fell under the bumbling mismanagement of the Unelected
Greedmaster.
Click Here
Excerpt: August 19, 1943
After three days of heavy fighting, the
Soviet Southwest Front breaks
through the German defenses on the Mius
River line.
General Jeschonnek, Chief of Staff of the
Luftwaffe, commits suicide
after being criticized for the Peenemunde
and Schweinfurt raids
Question
for Mark Morford
Q: How much feedback/mail do you typically get
after a column is published?
A: All depends on the column. A particularly pointed
anti-Bush anti-war column
will get me gobs of
sneering hate mail, mostly from the delirious, hardcore psychopatriots
at freerepublic.com
or lucianne.com or andrewsullivan.com, et al, where they post chunks
of my column in their
discussion forums, along with my e-mail address, and encourage each
other to flame me, usually
in the cutest sort of monosyllabic, ragingly homophobic, horribly
syntaxed, misspelled
sort of way. Makes me proud to be an American. My girlfriend loves
the anti-SF gay-bashing
they aim my way, I might add.
Attribution
Read Mark's great columns at http://www.sfgate.com/columnists/morford/
Gambling
with Nancy Grace
Click
Here
Excerpt:
Then she accused Geragos of somehow rewiring
his mind to deny to himself that Peterson was guilty.
She made a big production out of this,
saying that if some evidence were to somehow creep into his brain
that Peterson was guilty, his brain would
find a way to reject that without letting the thought connect with his
conscious intellect. Whew, Nancy,
do you kiss your Steely Dan with that foul mouth?
VCR
Alert - Tonight - The
finals of the 2003
World Series of Poker
from The Poker Room at Binion's
Horseshoe in Las Vegas is on ESPN tonight.
You should learn by watching the pros, especially if you expect
to be in a Hold 'em tourney some day. (cough)
It's mostly like regular poker, but the betting is a whole other
world.
Please visit our sponsors
Quotes
Bob Schieffer: "I've seen some
estimates that it may cost up to $50 billion to fix this. Who's going to
pay that?"
Spencer Abraham: "Ratepayers, obviously,
will pay the bill because they're the ones who benefit."
--exchange
on the August 17 Face the Nation, talking about the power grid that worked
fine under Clinton
Bob, if you weren't on the B.F.E.E. payroll, you might've
asked,
"Will the president's close friends reap billions
in profit from this, just like the war?"
You're a whore, Bob, now get out of here.
More
stickers have arrived
Get yours, then send in a picture of where you put it.
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OR, you could PayPal a small donation and get your stickers
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The
stickers are free, but donations are accepted.
We'll give away a prize each month for Best Sticker Placement.
Maybe a Brooke Burke calendar or
a copy of Joe Conason's new book.
...
Send in your sticker pics - win big prizes.
Is
the Bush tax cut fair to all income levels?
Very fair/pretty fair
20 %
About right
7 %
Pretty unfair/Very unfair
69 %
From http://www.businessweek.com
Is
Matt Drudge lying about his hits?
Drudge claims he gets over three million hits a day. But when
I went there to see if
the She Thing at the New York Whore Times's column was worth
printing, a pop-up
appeared which said I won a prise because I was the 1000th visitor
to his site.
Subject: Wesley Clark -
very impressive
Hi Bart,
Did you see Wesley Clark on CNN?
This guy would be unbeatable against Bush.
His impeccable background alone, when contrasted
with the non elected idiot,
will expose Dubya for the AWOL, hypocritical,
self-serving bastard that he is.
Now I've seen that he is a cool, quick thinking
and sincere person who is ready to attack the neo-cons.
This is the voice we've been yearning for!
I have joined the movement to draft him, and I would like
to encourage you to check it out, and promote
him on your site.
http://www.draftwesleyclark.com/
Kind regards
Bobby
No
Work, No Homes
Click
Here
Excerpt:
After the economic meeting, Mr. Bush said,
"This administration is optimistic about job creation."
It's too bad George Akerlof wasn't at the
meeting. Mr. Akerlof, a 2001 Nobel laureate in economics,
bluntly declared on Tuesday that "the Bush
fiscal policy is the worst policy in the last 200 years."
Speaking at a press conference arranged
by the Economic Policy Institute, Mr. Akerlof, a professor
at UC Berkeley, said, "Within 10 years,
we're going to pay a serious price for such irresponsibility."
"Find
this cock-sucker and break his legs..."
Have you seen the
video of Ralph Nader getting pied?
Click
Here
Hey, it's NOT funny!
The Catholics got a twofer Sunday night.
On The Sopranos, Carmella's uncle died, so they all had
to attend the funeral.
After the ceremony, they slipped the priest an envelope with
cash in it.
Would the priest have done the service without the gratuity?
An hour later on The Restaurant, business was slow so the
head ego-run-amock boy
has a priest come down to the place and bless the silverware,
the bar and the meatballs.
Besides a free meal and all the wine he could drink, you know
he got an envelope, too.
I guess I'm the only one in America who sees that as sleazy.
I mean, if business is bad, you rent a priest to voodoo on the
place to drum up business?
If that voodoo really worked, wouldn't everybody do that?
It's cheaper than running ads...
I'll bet there are people reading this who gave a priest money
to bless their car.
Do you really think your car is safer? Because the
priest blessed it with tap water
that he turned into Holy Water with a wave of his hand?
I know I'll never convince the believers, and I'm just
making you angry, so I'll stop now.
For now, on my laptop, I have no sound, so we can't do radio until
I get my computer back.
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Quotes
"Fox News is striking back by putting the demonizers
on notice that they will be held
responsible when they ...launch defamatory
personal attacks on Fox personnel.
--Whore O'Reilly, chief
TV propaganda spinner for the Nazi right
PIC
Mr. O'Reilly, can I ask a favor?
Could you please define the language that,
if printed on a web site, would make you sue me?
I'll pay your filing fees, I promise.
Subject: http://www.stopbushseattle.com
Portland, Aug 21st
Bellevue, Aug 22nd
Tacoma, Aug 22
Seattle, Aug 23rd
Please visit our sponsors
Marty's
E! page
Disinfotainment Today' (part 1) from Michael Dare
Updated the 'WTC films' page
Daniel Barenboim in Morocco
Conan O'Brien's 10th Anniversary
TV ratings for the PGA are down 41%
(Because Mr Perfect can't sink a two-foot putt)
Iggy Pop & The Stooges reschedule Detroit
Roseanne Barr's new show has been canceled
Jethro's 'Beverly Hillbillies Mansion & Casino' in Carson City,
NV
Andrea Thompson returns to acting in '24'
Seabiscuit's saddle
Scott Weiland got 3 years probation
And, the Enola Gay
click
Quotes
"Schwarzenegger's team wants to triple our
property taxes,
which goes to show you, don't send
a liberal to do a tax-fighter's job,"
-- Bill Simon (R-Pixiedust) the bitter loser to Gray Davis
last time
Subject: Ask questions
Where are the weapons of mass destruction?
Where is Bin Laden?
Where is my 401K?
How did a huge governmental surplus become
a huge deficit in two years?
During the campaign, why did George Bush
say he was a great uniter?
Why did the reasons we went to war with
Iraq change after the troops landed?
Where were Bush, Cheney, Ashcroft and members
of Congress during the Vietnam War?
Where are their kids during this war?
Was there a plan for postwar Iraq, or is
it trial and error?
Where have 2 million jobs gone over the
last two years?
How many people died during Clinton's "lie?"
How many have died during Bush's "truth?"
How can they say they are for the military,
yet cut veterans' benefits?
Why were we told the 2003 tax cut would
benefit all families, then find out
-- after it is passed -- that
20 million would not benefit?
Why isn't the full report released on the
9-11 attacks?
Why aren't the names of those who sat on
the Bush/Cheney Energy Panel released?
Why is it wrong to ask questions?
Why do I feel we have gone back to the
1950s' secret, paranoid, McCarthyism atmosphere?
Why will I, a retired military vet with
two boys serving overseas -- or any American
-- be called an un-American, yellow-bellied
liberal for asking these questions? Why?
Greg D
Cool!
Just saw a commercial for Bowling for Columbine
video on Jon Stewart.
Y'know, ...Stewart's a Jew I could vote for.
(Don't write - it's a joke!)
Musclehead's
16-year old rape victim?
Click
Here
Excerpt:
The 'actor' began his affair with Gigi
Goyette when she was only 16 (that makes it statuatory rape)
-- and even made love to her in the very
same hotel where he was staying with "Dateline" star Maria.
Hi, Bart!
I can't believe your birthday is Sept. 12th.
My beloved grandmother's was that day and
so is my favorite aunt's and my godson's.
My grandmother lived to be 99 and she was
a kick!
She LOVED to gamble!!
We used to have to pry her away from the
machines so she would eat something.
She loved to party, too!
All my very favorite people are born on
September 12th!!
Happy 50th, Bart!
Maria
Quotes
"Actually, major military operations. Because
we still have combat operations going on.
It's a different kind of combat mission,
but, nevertheless, it's combat, just ask the kids
that are over there killing and being
shot at."
-- President Notsosmart,
in an interview with the AFRTS, interrupting the questioner when asked
about
his pilot strut on May 1 of, as the journalist put it, "the end of combat
operations", Attribution
"Just ask the kids that are over there killing?"
I'll bet he had an erection from just saying those words.
Bart,
I saw a pic of Jillian in todays edition.
I was watching her show "Good Day Live"
(although I HATE Fox).....and they were talking about Arnold.
She said that there was a website with
a picture of him with a naked girl on his shoulders and her bolders
hanging down around his ears. She said
that she was not allowed to give the name of the website on air.
I had seen that picture (and emailed it
to all my friends) on your site.
I wondered if she was talking about you!
COOL!
"Hasta la vista, Gray Davis!"
Harry Hamlin starred in a "political thriller" mini-series on
NBC about 10 years ago.
It was "Fortunate Son" and it turned out to be prescient.
In the series, (as always, this is the way I remember it) Hamlin
was a flawed pervert,
(His flaw, NBC's sex hook to make people watch, was that he enjoyed
surprise anal sex with women.
He surprised his secretary with that one night - if memory serves...
I remember it being totally salacious, with the taken girl pleading,
"No!...not
...there...")
This was Tittilation City ten years ago...
These days, hotties brag about it on Howard Stern.
So, Harry Hamlin is this wacko, fake candidate for senator or
president - whatever - and his
handlers hired a really good sharpshooter to graze him
while he was making a speech on live TV .
Everything worked as planned.
Towards the end of his speech, he had maybe 30 seconds to finish
- and a shot rang out.
It hit him in the arm or shoulder and he fell, all bloody with
his white, starched shirt, to the ground.
His "surprised" secretary told him he wasn't hit that bad - and
to stand up and finish his speech.
Like whichever Rocky film you like the most, Hamlin struggled
his bloody-ass to the microphone,
and said something about, "America's
enemies cannot stop me from telling God's honest truth,"
and he collasped and the EMS people took him away ...and his
approval rating soared to almost 90
Isn't that where we are today?
That horseshit back
in May - with the Monkey in the pilot's costume on the Lincoln?
Was that anything other than another pre-arranged, press-enabled
truth-mugging?
Another thing that pisses me off - every time we get a TV report
from Crawford.
The lying press whores are always positioned so the viewer sees
a tractor and a barn behind them
as Bush's good little volunteer puppy files his "Bush
is great" story for the networks.
Karl Rove must be standing there, saying, "No,
camera HERE and reporter HERE!"
They're trying to pretend the Kennebunkport billionaire is some
Texas rancher, and he's not.
Why acn't at least one reporter - out of the 40 or so that are
there - have the balls to say,
"The White House has positioned us,
I suppose, so you can see Bush's tractor."
How can every reporter be a willing sheep for the BFEE?
I'll bet helen Thomas wouldn't stand in front of the damn tractor.
Was Helen Thomas the last honest reporter in the WH press corps?
Subject: Clark vs Monkey
Bart,
General Clark smacked Mr. Rove's pet monkey
http://www.cnn.com/2003/ALLPOLITICS/08/17/sprj.irq.clark.comments/
"...but
I'm not a monkey - I'm a man..."
Subject: 9-11 Phone Calls
from Plane
Bart,
Am I missing something? Everyone
seems to be concentrating on
whether or not a call could be placed from
a cell phone during a flight.
If I were trying to call someone, I would
just pick up that phone
staring me in the face from the back of
the seat in front of me.
Hey, good point, hasn't been addressed here, from what I remember.
Sure, if Mom gets a call from her son on a plane, she might use
"cell phone"
to describe it, but she wouldn't really have anyway to know for
sure - would she?
Would the terrorists have had the knowledge,
forethought,
or even the capability to restrict the
phones?
MM
MM,
They apparently knew more about cell phones on planes than you
and I
I heard somewhere that passengers were almost instructed
to call loved ones.
It would be damn tough to make a clandestine phone call with
four armed gunmen watching.
Football's around the corner, the pennant races are heating up,
Mr. Perfect tries to fight off the BartCop Hex, and Ted Williams'
head
is in a lobster pot. It's beginning to feel like fall...
Check it out at...
Click to Enter
What's
up with Ted Rall?
Click
Here
He's attacking Howard Dean, calling him "another Clinton" - oh
my God - not another Clinton!
Jesus, if this country ever needed "another Clinton" it's right
now.
Possibly worse, he's hiding behind the words of others, which
is kind of a Rush trick.
This way, he can say lots of nasty things without ever saying
any nasty things.
Excerpt:
But as
Vermonters tell anyone who's willing to listen, the former governor they
call "Ho-Ho..."
According
to Vermonters...
"He's
moved sharply left," says John Nobody of some rightie think tank...
Dean's
supporters don't believe what they're told. They hear what they want to
believe,
and Dean provides the
strident vagaries that fuel their self-delusion...
Wow - Ted says Dean supporters aren't too
bright, and they're delusional, too.
"If he
gets the nomination, he'll run back to the center and be more mainstream,"
predicts a Republican..
Well of course he's going to do that
- every elected politician has done that.
You play to youir base in the primaries
and play to the country in the general.
Ted doesn't know this?
...and why is Ted going to Republicans
to get nasty quotes about Dean?
And how
can antiwar types reconcile Dean's support for Bush's invasion of Afghanistan?
Gee, could it be because Osama was in Afghanistan? Is Ted
so leftist that he's a dove on 9-11?
Damn, that's scary-left, if you ask mel. As good a writer
as Ted is, he spent almost the whole column
attacking Dean, with a little venom for Clinton and even some
for Bush, but he never said who he was FOR.
All we got was a list of people he doesn't like. Is that
good writing?
He mentioned Kucinich without attacking him, maybe he's for Dennis
- who knows?
http://www.secretsofthetomb.com/
The
Groping Governor
Oversexed Arnie - is it the steroids?
Click
Here
Excerpt:
When Arnold came to London in 2000, his
behaviour led insiders to label him ‘the octopus’.
When TV presenter Anna Richardson interviewed
Arnold for Big Screen at the Dorchester Hotel,
he asked her pointblank if her breasts
were real. He then pulled her onto his knee, circled her nipple
with his finger, squeezed it and announced:
‘Yeah, they are real.’
And when Denise Van Outen interviewed him
for The Big Breakfast, he slapped her bottom then
brushed his arm against her breast. Afterwards,
he smirked: ‘It was a handful. I never know if my
wife’s watching. I’ll tell her it was a
stuntman.’
Subject: In the dictionary
No kidding- 2002 edition of Webster's Unabridged
has this entry:
bush·wa, noun.
rubbishy nonsense; baloney; bull:
You'll hear a lot of boring bushwa about
his mechanical skill.
Also, bushÆwah from its use in political
rhetoric,
the actual sense being lost; taken as euphemism
for BULLSHIT]
Gde
'Zsa
Zsa Saddam' to Taunt Iraqi Regime Loyalists
Click
Here
Excerpt:
Meet "Zsa Zsa Saddam," the U.S. army's
latest ploy in the four-month hunt for Saddam.
U.S. forces plan to put up posters around
Saddam's hometown of Tikrit showing his face
on Hollywood heroines and other stars in
an attempt to enrage his followers and draw them out.
As well as Saddam dolled up as a slinky
Zsa Zsa Gabor, there is a busty Rita Hayworth Saddam,
a grooving Elvis Saddam and even Saddam
in the guise of British-born rocker Billy Idol.
For a liberal helping of world news and views,
visit www.positiveuniverse.com,
and get
our beautiful bumper sticker!
Subject: Atomic Anniversary
Bart,
We've just passed the anniversaries (Aug
6 & 9, 1945) of the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
Odd that at the same time that the Bush
administration is discussing more nuclear (nukular?) testing and
the development of more weapons of mass
destruction, no one has pointed out the anniversary of first use
of such weapons - and the ensuing horror.
Americans are notorious for ignoring the
lessons of history, but this?
How can they ignore this and make plans
to do it again?
http://nuketesting.enviroweb.org/hew/Japan/Hirosh.html
Cris
The reason we dropped that bomb, was to
save lives because going building-to-building in Japan
would kill - I heard Randy Humphries say
this today, "well in excess of 140,000
soldiers."
He seems to be saying that when you invade
another country, sometimes people have pride
and they fight for their land - they don't
roll over like senate Democrats.
We dropped a bomb to kill hundreds of thousands
of innocent Japanese people.
We did that to avoid what we're facing
today in Iraq, except Iraq didn't attack us.
Oh well, I'm sure Bush, our war hero, knows what he's doing...
Bush's
American soldier body count in Iraq
It now stands at 267
284
The Pentagon released
new figures, reflecting the wounded who have since died.
Total deaths since the Bloodthirsty Bully said, "Bring
'em On": 63+
Perhaps 1,100 wounded.
How much more are we willing to tolerate?
Note: Believe this figure. The site is back up.
It's from http://lunaville.org/warcasualties/Summary.aspx
We were going to press when we learned of the massacre in Baghdad.
We'll update the body count tomorrow.
In trouble?
Call the
918-493-1500
You have two minutes to speak your peace.
Happy Birthday to the best President we ever had.
Have a good time today - that's an order.
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Copyright
© 2003, bartcop.com
Surgery?
On my favorite vocal cords?
(The story says "chords," but that's a mistake, right?)
No wonder Shirley hasn't called yet.
She was waiting until her voice was perfect to call.
Shrl - call The
BartPhone, just to say "Hi!"
Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop
Member - for free!
Call the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at the Vegas Hard
Rock on your next American tour.
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