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Quotes
"You bunch of pitiful, hypocritical, idiotic,
spoiled mugwumps. (He means liberals)
Get your head out of the sand and smell
the Twin Towers."
-- Charlie Daniels (R-Racistbastard)
Hey Charlie, I have a question for you.
When your tour bus drives thru Louisiana,
do you still sing,
"It's be kind to niggers week,
be kind to niggers week,
be careful what you speak,
'cause it's be kind to niggers week..."
You white-power son of a bitch, don't you ever try to tell me what to do.
Excerpt:
With the Bush administration having sidestepped
the UN in order to go to war, the move marks a defeat for
the White House, where defence department
hawks had dismissed the UN as irrelevant. But the move will
nonetheless come under stern criticism
from the French, Germans and security council members who have argued
that if the international community is
going to share the burdens of occupation, it must share the decision-making.
Diplomats expect France to exact a heavy
price for agreeing to the resolution.
This greedy, self-appointed gang of thugs
bullied their way into killing all those Iraqi people for no good reason,
but Oooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
did they have fun screaming "Freedom fries!"
at France.
That's typical Smirk diplomacy.
France was right all along, and now they're
going to rub Bush's nose in dog poop and teach him a lesson.
No matter where Bush is, no matter what
he's doing, ...in his mind he's still blowing up frogs.
Quotes
"I think we should just trust our president
in every decision
that he makes and we should just support
that."
Great looking, but naive and stupid.
Attribution
Hey Britney, when you're drunk on a first date, do you trust the
guy on every decison?
No, you don't, because men are animals that will take
a mile if an inch is offered.
Disclosure: She made $33M last year.
She needs Bush's tax cut as much as GE, Viacom, FOX and Disney
Hex on thee!
Hex on thee!
Hex on thee!
Hey Monkey!
Let's see how well you do with the BartCop Hex on your lying ass...
Quotes
"Dennis Miller for president."
The cutest Nazi in America?
Hey Angie, between you and Jason Sehorn,
I guess you guys need a tax cut, too, am
I right?
I'm so old, I remember when hotties were
Democrats.
Maybe they just can't stand wimpering wimps.
Excerpt:
The US on Tuesday sneered at plans by four
European countries to create an autonomous
European military command headquarters
near Brussels separate from NATO , referring
to the idea's proponents as "chocolate
makers".
In unusually blunt language that drew surprised
gasps from reporters, State Department
spokesman Richard Boucher scoffed at Belgium,
France, Germany and Luxembourg for
continuing to support the proposal that
they first introduced at a mini-summit in April.
He described the April meeting as one between
"four countries that got together and had
a little bitty summit" and then
referred to them collectively as "the chocolate makers."
Hey George, Belgium didn't murder 10,000 innocent people with
their chocolate.
We're not going to have any friends left. The same day Bush goes
begging for the UN
to bail his quagmired-ass out of a jam, they slur the very people
from whom we ask help
It was the first poker beatdown I've ever seen, and the
announcers either missed it completely
or they covered up an embarrassing situation. Last night's
game was in Hollywood, which had
the potential to be really awful. They said "Playmates
and stars" were playing with the pros.
The good news? All the "celebs" were drummed out before
the cameras rolled, all except
for Jerry Buss, who owns the Los Angeles Lakers.
I've never seen poker played this bad - ever.
It got down to Jerry Buss and Layne Flack, a very slick professional.
It was a triple whammy on Buss.
Buss was behind almost ten-to-one
in chips going head-to-head with a pro.
Buss refused to bet when he
had great hands!
With just two players, Buss would get an Ace-King (big
slick) and check!
Buss was so bad, it's like his
cards were transparent. Four hands in a row, Layne Flack
stole pots from Buss with hands of 4-2, 5-3, 7-3
and 8-5. Each time, Buss had a pair
or two very high cards and he just refused to bet them.
Flack kept showing him after
each hand that he beat him with nothing, but Buss
was unable to learn the lesson.
How did Buss get so rich by being afraid to gamble on a great hand?
White House 'Bonesman' Leads Nation Into the Dark
Excerpt:
"My senior year (at Yale University) I joined
Skull and Bones, a secret society,"
President Bush wrote in his autobiography,
"so secret, I can't say anything more."
He doesn't have to. He's practically turning
the government into a secret society - an old-boy, throwback
establishment that even holds its secret
spy-court proceedings in an elaborately locked, windowless room
that sounds similar to the Bones' elaborately
locked, practically windowless "tomb," or campus clubhouse.
Bush, a loyal and particularly active member
of Skull and Bones, a mysterious, historically misogynist
Yale-based secret society, seems to have
done almost all he can to promote a level of secrecy in
government not seen since the Nixon administration:
Subject: Let's put a moral value on killing
Yes, those dam Palestinians are targeting kids.
Is that a true statement?
...you want me to answer that?
My guess is yes.
Or, maybe their bus schedule was from last year...
We live in a new age where terror strikes
as the opponent.
Did the OK city bomber care if kids were
involved?
Did he care?
That's probably why he chose the Murrah
building.
Killin is killin
I believe that to be simplistic.
...and if you think you can put an angrier moral value to what is being killed....
Whoa!
Are you saying killing children does
not produce more anger than killing adults?
Can I get a Nancy Grace guarantee
on that?
...then you are alinged with AIPAC.
ha ha
I'd have to know what the AIPAC was
before I'd consent align with them.
Let me guess - The American-Inter-Palestinian
Association Corporation.
How'd I do?
print that dude.
Or no doubt you appeal to a certain web
influence.
Stephen, possibly
enjoying a cocktail...
Stephen, you are 100 percent correct.
I, no doubt, appeal to a "certain web influence."
With which "certain web influence" do you
think I'm alligned?
I hope they're paying me a lot, because August was dismal for
fund raising.
That's why I'm eating dog food right now.
(Not really)
Subject: I always hated you...
BUTT,
...you are right, there is no left in the media.
If only the assholes who voted for this
moron were the only ones effected by his "policies"
....just a dream.
Draft Clark!
Marty's
E! page
The Hollywood Hustle by the Artful Dodger
Johnny Depp speaks
Showtime enters the realm of propaganda
Federal appeals court delayed new FCC rules
Film of George Orwell found
GQ honored The Clash
Doonesbury will be censored this Sunday
Keith Richards calls Eric Clapton lazy
Silvio Berlusconi's newest album of love songs
Film footage of Admiral Byrd's Antarctic expeditions to be restored
'South Park' to syndication
Eminem's contest
The last honest man in LA
Jayson Blair's twinkie defense
Rosie O'Donnell backing Boy George's play
And, Jennifer Lopez is getting married - again
click
Empire
of Novices
by MoDo - she hates everybody
Excerpt:
The Bush foreign policy team always had
contempt for Bill Clinton's herky-jerky,
improvised interventions around the world.
When it took control, it promised a
global stewardship purring with gravity,
finesse and farsightedness.
But now the Bush "dream team" is making the impetuous Clinton look like Rommel.
Rummy wanted to exorcise the stigma of Vietnam
and prove you could use a lighter, faster force.
But our adventures in Iraq and Afghanistan
may not banish our fears of being mired in a place
halfway around the world where we don't
understand the language or culture, and where our
stretched-thin soldiers are picked off,
guerrilla-style.
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Update:
We had no winners (or entrants) in August, but I know somebody wants
that Conason book or that BB calendar, so maybe we can give one
away in September?
Excerpt:
It was, like most product rollout campaigns,
predicated on exaggerations and outright lies. And since then,
we've ended up with more blood on our national
hands than we've had since the Vietnam War. To date,
more than 6,000 Iraqi civilians and nearly
300 American soldiers have died in the conflict, more than half
of those since May 1.
Much has changed since last year's product
rollout. First of all, as the second anniversary of Sept. 11 looms,
we're no closer to knowing the truth about
that attack on American civilians as we were on Sept. 12, 2001.
Oh, we pretty much know who's responsible,
but our interim president and his minions have killed the investigation
and ignored the pleas of next of kin, and
what we've been given is 28 blank pages of information related to
Saudi Arabia. So, it is not a report. It
is an insult to the people who want to know why their friends and family
were incinerated. Not to mention, a colossal
waste of taxpayer money.
Subject: extreme
Bart dude,
Your a tad bit offcenter with your statement
of a website for political humor,
it's more like political Liberal humor
- you don't even have the guts to mention that,
instead you wait for people to enter and
see for themselves your bias.
Oh, you want me to bill it as "Bart's leftist
humor?"
Does anyone do that?
Anyone in the history of TV, radio, comics,
oped, etc?
How many issues did it take before you
figured it out??
Sorry dude, the website sucks, and you want people's hard earned cash to read your trash?
No, my trash is free to read.
What's wrong with your head, boy?
Did you have to pay to get in?
My radio trash is what we charge for.
, - at least be upfront with it and
show your true color and earn the respect of those who
may disagree with you....like you care
anyways right?
Joe Kane
Joe,
I'll bet you could kick my ass in a live debate room, am I right?
Would you like to try? I'll bet you could shut me up, am
I right?
I'll bet you could wipe the floor with me, am I right?
You are up for something like that, right?
Huh?
Are ya?
Huh?
Are ya?
One thing, tho...
You'd go easy on me, right?
ha ha
You promise not to beat me up too bad?
ha ha
You're like the 300 claimants that came in before you.
You make your wild little claims then cry,
"I have better things to do with my time than
debate someone of your ilk."
Don't feel bad...there's no shame in losing to the Champ.
If you grow a pair, let me know.
When Weiner masturbates,
is he having sex with the dead?
Karl Rove and Al Martin
Bart,
I did extensive searching on the Karl Roverer
link to the German firm that Al Martin talks about
and as much as I'd have loved to find that
fat bastard linked to Nazis and concentration camps,
I couldn't find any links between them.
Click Here for an interesting Bio on Karl Goebbels...
rds
From: Ask ESPN TV
Subject: Re: Broadcast Racism
Thank you for your e-mail.
Rush is an excellent communicator and a
big sports fan.
He was hired for those two reasons, not
his politics.
His role will be to provide the fans perspective
and
to create discussion and debate.
Sincerely,
ESPN Viewer Response
They're lying.
They hired the vulgar Pigboy because 4M people listen to his
radio show
and if Rush can get 1/4 of them to watch ESPN TONIGHT,
then ABC will make money.
If OJ Simpson could bring in 4M viewers, ABC would've hired him.
Musclehead whacked by egg today
"Matt
Drudge owes me bacon and toast, too!"
Excerpt:
Musclehead Arnie, who was accused of ducking
a debate with his rivals,
could not dodge an egg today as he arrived
for a campaign rally at a college campus.
Excerpt:
Would you concede that John Kerry protected
Skull & Bones secrets last Sunday?
A secret "society" where the super-rich
conspire (by definition) to "help our own?"
What does this "help our own" perspective
cost the non-rich and the non-white?
Whatever secrets he protected are shared
with some of the world's most evil people.
Hey, if he's your senator and you trust
him because you know him well, that's cool.
But I don't know Kerry very well, and I
don't know the Skulls at all.
To me, this is more worrysome than the
1960 question - will Kennedy obey the Pope?
If Kerry has a brand on his ass, I want to know who owns him.
Excerpt:
Initiation rites reportedly include strenuous
and traumatic activities of
the new member, while immersed naked
in mud, and in a coffin.
More important is the "sexual autobiography":
The initiate tells the order all the sex secrets
of his young life. Weakened mental
defenses against manipulation, and the blackmail potential
of such information, have obvious permanent
uses in enforcing loyalty among members.
Please visit our sponsors
Good riddence, Paul Hill
There really is no moral difference between
abortion doctor killer Paul Hill who was just
executed in Florida for the murder of a
doctor and his bodyguard and the terrorists who
crashed the planes into the world trade
center. Both were religious terrorists using God
as an excuse for mass murder and thinking
of themselves as martyr to encourage others
to murder for God. Whether Christian or
Muslim - murder is murder - there's no difference.
Is God so impotent that he needs people
like Paul Hill to murder doctors in his behalf?
Is Jesus really that lame?
Paul Hill is certianly not someone I want to be in Heaven with.
Sure not going to win any souls here! What's
scary is that there are a lot of Christian in
America who actually believe in killing
for Jesus.
But as far as I'm concerned it's Christians like Paul Hill that make me thank God I'm an atheist.
Marc Perkel
Subject: Religious Insanity
Bart,
Semantics aside, what's the difference between
a 9/11 hi-jacker, and one of
these pro-life extremists who blows up
a clinic or kills an abortion doctor?
I think I have to reference a George Carlin
quote that goes something like
"Christian Fundamentalists, Jewish Fundamentalists,
Muslim Fundamentalists,
and just plain guys from Montana are going
to make this country very
interesting for the next couple of years."
Mark Levy
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a month when you're on a tight budget?
The long-lost (four days) Volume 1147 - The Kiss has been found and uploaded.
Click Here to read this instant classic!
Quotes
"If you were a secret society that wanted to
highjack the country,
wouldn’t YOU set up your boys in BOTH
parties?"
- anonymous
Excerpt:
Top White House officials personally approved
the evacuation of dozens of influential Saudis,
including relatives of Osama bin Laden,
from the United States in the days after the Sept. 11 attacks
when most flights were still grounded,
a former White House adviser said today.
Michael Moore told us this over a year ago, but the press ignored it to protect Bush.
Subject: Iraq is about half of 1965 Vietnam in intensity
I just had this sudden realization about
our involvement in Iraq.
The total level is very similar to our
1965 Vietnam numbers.
We have 150,000 troops in Iraq now, we had
184,300 in 1965.
We are sustaining fatalities at a yearly
rate of 670, against 1500 for 1965.
We are sustaining wounds at a yearly rate
of 2400, against 6000 for 1965.
Statistically it seems that we're about
at half the action levels of 1965 Vietnam.
Admittedly, that was the early "easier"
part of the war, but still it is far more
than I thought it was!
Fatality Comparison
Iraq, now 300 fatalities since March 19 (5.5 months) 650/year
Vietnam, 1961-1965
1864 fatalities (mostly 1965)
Vietnam, total
58202 (1961-1970) all causes
Vietnam, 1965 est.
fatalities (using above assumptions)
1440/year
Refer to this table: http://www.rjsmith.com/kia_tbl.html
Attribution http://members.aol.com/warlibrary/vwatl.htm
I lost the sender's name, sorry...
Excerpt:
Nine years after he calmly shot and killed
an abortion doctor and his escort outside a Pensacola clinic,
Paul Hill died by lethal injection as his
supporters warned that his actions might now be replicated.
"I'm willing and I feel very honored that they
are most likely going to kill me for what I did."
said the smug-ass former preacher.
About an hour before the execution today, storm clouds gathered,
and just around 6 o'clock a lightning bolt
struck near the death chamber.
If you count that he got himself murdered,
too, that makes three people he killed.
These violent pro-lifers are just, plain
crazy.
Plus, Jeb Bush, devout Catholic, is in political trouble for
signing the death warrant.
Oh, the reason Jeb is Catholic? It's because he married a Catholic.
If he gets divorced and marries a Jew, will be become Jewish,
too?
Sidebar:
Can you imagine Old Testament God getting on Abraham for denying
Him over a woman?
Hell, look what he did to poor Moses, after a long 40 years,
for simply tapping the rock twice.
Like Laura the Unloved, Jeb dumped the God he believed
in - for a woman!
Laura did it for the money and Jeb did it for the honey.
Am I the only one who takes religion seriously anymore?
"I pray
before each murder..."
Quotes
"The runaway national debt has much the same
impact on our nation's financial condition as termites
do on the structure of a house.
A basic ingredient to achieving the American Dream is thrift...
By hijacking our savings, the government
hijacks our opportunity to experience the American Dream."
-- quote from "Restoring the Dream", 1995 Republican National
Committee
But when their monkey goes spend crazy to enrich his already-rich
friends,
they change they tune and start quoting, "Compared
to the percentage of overall GDP..."
Subject: Jesus bashing
I enjoy your site but the Jesus bashing
is too much.
What did Jesus do to deserve His name to
be slandered?
Because some pseudo Christians capitalize
on His name?
I don't think I've ever bashed Jesus.
It's my best guess Jesus was a real man who walked the Earth,
but miracles and life after death, etc - I can't buy any of that.
I've always tried to be certain that I attacked the insanity,
not the man.
If somebody wants to pray in their home or church, that's OK with
me.
But when guns come out, when force is used, when lies are used,
I feel
that it's everyone's duty to speak out. I'd think as a
true believer, you
would be more angry at the charlatans than I, since I have no
stake in it.
What if Bush claimed he was invading Iraq
to honor Bartcop, to capitalize on your
powerful image and to lead your followers
to the slaughter? Then people started to
slander you because of it, even though
everything he has done in your name goes
completely against what you stand for,
it just wouldn’t be right would it?
I agree.
If I was Jesus, I'd send the Unelected Pinhead a firm message
that even he could understand.
Jesus gave His life for us.
He died a horrible excruciating death,
doesn’t that deserve some respect?
carolyn
Carolyn, take a deep breath, I'm going to state my opinion.
I don't believe any of the supernatural stuff, not for a second,
but even if it was true:
Who asked Him to?
As a small Catholic, we had a picture of a crucifide Jesus in
every classroom.
Hourly, they reminded us five-year olds that this was our
fault.
MY fault.
They tried to stick us with "Original sin," which I found to be
unacceptable.
How dare they install that kind of fear and guilt
in a little kid.
Another deep breath - If you
know for a fact that you'll rise again in three days, and live
for all eternity as the Prince of Light, it's quite
a bit easier to "give your life" for someone else.
Compare the sacrifice of Jesus to a soldier in Vietnam
who threw himself on a grenade to save his platoon.
That soldier made the ultimate sacrifice, without the
Prince-for-Eternity guarantee.
In the mood of conciliation, let's just agree my views on organized
religion might've turned out differently
if the wacky Catholics had tried to sell me a more sensible bill
of goods.
baseball pennant races
football previews
stats in the BartCopSports labs.
world championships going on in track
Father Mushroom is a gambler
All this and more at...
Click to Enter
Subject: Bowling for Columbine
Bart, you wrote:
> We finally saw Bowling for Columbine
> It was OK, but thought I would like it more
than I did.
I agree I too had better hopes for the film,
maybe Fahrenheit 911 will be better. But he mentioned
the Clinton bombing for a good reason in
his mind. He thought that the irony between a hail storm
of bombs hitting Slobo and a hail storm
of bullets hitting students was funny. I know Clinton was
doing the 'right?' thing but he was just
drawing a connection.
nitro
Dude, I'm with you, and you may have just
explained something to me.
Perhaps Moore believes "violence is violence,"
whether you're stopping a
genocidal madman or shooting up your local
high school cafeteria.
Lots of Democrats believe that, but I disagree
with them.
Thanks for the note.
Update
Tommy and I are trying to mesh schedules, but the studio is up
and working
so I might post some spoken-word outrage later on today.
Real 
is
almost here!
Bush's
American soldier body count in Iraq
It now stands at 286,
303 counting the injured
who have since died.
Soon, we'll be at 400.
How long before we hit 600? Or 1000?
The Pentagon released new figures, reflecting the wounded who have since died.
Total deaths since the frog-blaster said, "Bring 'em On": 82+
Perhaps 1,200 wounded - missing arms, legs and eyes.
How much more are we willing to tolerate?
It's from http://lunaville.org/warcasualties/Summary.aspx
In trouble?
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You have two minutes to speak your peace.
"What's the difference between a deer in the
road and a nigger in the road?
The deer has skid marks in front of
it. ...talent on
loan from God."
Listen to Rush weekdays from noon - 3pm Eastern
The EIB network, the White spot on your dial.
Subject: Murderer Paul Hill's reward in Heaven
Hey Bart,
It's somewhat of a rhetorical question,
I know, but it bears repeating, and forgive me if I sound like Andy
Rooney here: Have you ever noticed how
all of the religious nuts seem to think that if they murder for
their tribal god images, they will have
some big reward for it in the afterlife?
Paul Hill didn't specifically mention what
his reward might be, but do you suppose it has anything to
do with 72 virgins? These fundamentalist
Christians are no better than the fundamentalist Muslims.
They really deserve each other. Bush's
wars really are a continuation of the Crusades, with more than
a little oil thrown in for good measure.
It comes down to 'fundies' fighting each other.
I thought this was the 21st century.
Can't we get past this archaic mentality of letting a nonexistant
'invisible cloud being', as you rightly
refer to it, influence all our actions? I just wish there were a
way
of isolating these people so they could
exterminate each other without causing the rest of us any harm.
Mike in Philly
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