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 America where are you now?
 Don't you care about your sons and daughters?
 Don't you know we need you now?
 We can't fight alone against this monster

by Bruce Yurgil http://home.earthlink.net/~ifness/index.html    Back Issues  Contact us Your Ad Here The Forum The Reader Perkel's Blog Bart Cook Bart Stocks LINKS 2004 Live CHAT Project 60 Stickers Bart Sports Bart Store BC Entertainment

In Today's Treehouse... White House Retreats on WMD Kerry 39 Dean 26 Clark 13 Part of Patriot Act nixed  G'day Mate thehuntingofthepresident.com Ashcroft: 'Evil chemistry' Scary shit on the coming crash Bush - Deserter or a coward?  Dubya's Vietnam Medal Quote of the Day "They may have a vision for the country, and    that's fine, but all I see them doing up there    in New Hampshire is knocking the hell out of    my son and I don't like it one bit."      --the Disaster Monkey's Daddy, always protecting      Junior from the "evildoers" who won the 2000 election                                                         Attribution

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 Quotes

"I bet no president has stuck more pencils in the ceiling of the Oval Office than me..."
     -- The Disaster Monkey said smugly to himself as he sharpened more pencils    Attribution
 

 Can you believe the mind on this seven year-old madman?
 This is how he spends his day, I guarantee it.
 Condi and Unka Dick do the work, while the Monkey plays with himself.

 The worst part - America knew he was unable to do a man's job and almost elected him.
 Each time Texas was about to execute a black man with a sleep/drunk lawyer, the pardon and
 parole board sent over a fact report that about the case, but Governor Iidot refused to read them.

 According to published reports, Bush would accept the report, put it on his desk and ask,
"Did the guy do it?"   ...and each time, the answer was "Yes," so Bush didn't bother reading it.

 The son of a bitch can't even take a few minutes away from sticking pencils in the ceiling to do
 his job as governor before executing a man he never met - and he's that same kind of president.

 White House Retreats From Weapons Claims
 512 dead and now they say, "Our bad"

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 The White House retreated Monday from its once-confident claims that Iraq (news - web sites)
 had weapons of mass destruction, and Democrats swiftly sought to turn the about-face into an
 election-year issue against President Bush (news - web sites).

 The administration's switch came after retired chief U.S. weapons inspector David Kay said
 he had concluded, after nine months of searching, that Saddam Hussein (news - web sites)
 did not have stockpiles of forbidden weapons. Asked about Kay's remarks, White House
 spokesman Scott McClellan refused to repeat oft-stated assertions that prohibited weapons
 eventually would be found.

 Senate Minority Leader Tom Daschle called for an investigation - either by the Senate Intelligence
 Committee or an independent commission - into the "administration's role in the intelligence failures
 leading up to the war with Iraq."

 I know - let's get Kissinger and Lee Hamilton to chair the investigation!

.. 

"It depends on how the Democrats play it," said James Thurber, director of the Center for
 Congressional and Presidential Studies at American University. "Basically they're dominating
 the news as much as the president is these days, and if they continue to criticize the president
 on this, then it begins to hurt a little bit.

"But basically he is doing so well in the polls at this point, on the economy but
  also even on the war, that I don't see it as a major hit," Thurber said.
 

 Bush got 500 soldiers killed

 but it's OK?

 ...because he's popular?

 It's OK that he ...murdered a helpless country?

 ...because he's popular?

 Holy Koresh - Clinton sorta lied about sex and he got impeached!

 Bush gets caught pulling this deadly global crime...  will the Democrats roll over a-fucking-gain?
 I can't stand losing to the Disaster Monkey again and again.
 Bush should be put on trial for war crimes!

 If the Democrats can't figure out a way to beat Bush now,
 I demand to be made head of the DNC the morning after we blow this election.

 If the Democrats find a way to screw this one up, too, ...the way I feel right now,
 I'm going to feel like pulling a Martin Luther come November.

 Just point me towards the door...

 Kerry wins New Hampshire big

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"There are some serious doubts about whether Dean can beat President Bush,"
  said Republican pollster-for- sale, John Zogby  Attribution
 

 I forget which Nazi said this, but the easy GOP play here is to produce a TV spot with Dean's
 wild Iowa rant, then freeze the video when he finally gets to this position
 ..
  ...and then the very, very calm announcer will gently ask,
"Can we allow this man's finger on the nuclear button?"

 Since this next election is all about fear and Osama, the Democrats could lose 80 states.
 I heard Chris the Screamer saying he felt bad about playing Dean's rant 100 times
 because Dean is a good, solid guy who caught a few bad breaks in a row.

 Hey Chris - stay on their side - we don't want you.  You're a whore who'll switch sides
 depending on where the most money is, so keep on keeping on being for sale, you tramp.

 When the GOP hate machine focuses on the Democrats, it's damn hard to get any traction because
 Dave, Leno, Conan and Craigers will smell a cheap-ass laugh - and their work for the week is done.

 That's how "Gore invented the internet" got started.  The lazy press refused to check the wild
 rumors they heard.  It was a right-wing lie that got tossed into the GOP echo chamber of talk radio,
 cable TV channels, the networks and the big papers.

 To make it in politics these days you have to either be perfect or a Republican.

 Bartspin

 Kerry won New Hampshire, a neighboring state, with the help of Jean Shaheen and Ted Kennedy.
 Those two can only help you in the Northeast, Senator.  Iowa was impressive, New Hampshire not so much.

 Dean came in second in his neighboring state - but how many neighboring states can Vermont have?

 Clark came in third, a southern military man in the Northeast - not too shabby.
 And the next primaries are almost all in the south - his base.

 Puzzler - Clark is back in OKC this week, for a free pancake breakfast.
 General, why aren't you doing fundraisers?

 Edwards came in fourth, not too shabby for a southerner, but that's two places down
 from his miracle second-place finish in Iowa.

 Jomentum came in a lousy fifth, but he refuses to read the writing on the wall.

 Poor Dennis Kucinich got just one percent, and this is a state where 45 percent of the voters
 describe themselves as "liberals."  Dennis, as a friend, I gotta tell you - it ain't working.
 Dennis got less than 3,000 votes.   On the upside, Kucinich got more votes than Al Sharpton.

 A week from tonight we could have a new front runner.

 G'day Mate

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 You constantly hold your self up to be a ballsy guy, a "fear nothing American" guy,
 a guy ready to rip a new one for anybody who challenges you, but you wouldn't publish
 this photo because "your readers would give you a hard time".
 Then you say your Democatic reps have no balls!

 Note: If you'd like to say who you're voting for and explain why, send it to  bartcop@bartcop.com

 A couple of rules:
Send plain text only - no html or crazy fonts or colors.
Make it short, 2-3 paragraphs, and write it yourself - don't copy and paste.

 Quotes

''This nation is full of people who take medication every day and will do so for the rest of their lives...
  the quantity of medicine Limbaugh is accused of ingesting -- 1,800 pills in 210 days -- works out to
  roughly 8.5 pills a day,' "certainly not an outrageous amount. The only conclusion that I can draw
  is that Mr. Limbaugh ... is being singled out more than anyone else for actions that no one else in
  this community would be subjected to"
      --Roy Black, Rush's professional bullshitter    Attribution
 

 Actually, the exact opposite is true.
 If Rush wasn't a rich celebrity friend of the governors of Texas and Florida,
 if he was a poor black man from the inner city caught possessing bags of synthetic heroin,
 he'd already be serving time and it's sad that Roy Black would tell such a blatant lie.

 If the DNC had any brains or the will to win this election,  (should I even bother to finish this crazy idea?)
 they would produce an ad showing the Disaster Monkey in his dress up flight suit on the Lincoln saying,
 "Mission Accomplished," and then cut to a widow receiving the folded flag from the Marine at Arlington.

 But no, they won't do that, because some Republican might complain and then the Democrat would fold
 faster than Jerry Buss and apologize for trying to make America understand that we're not better off
 than we were four years ago - not by a long goddamn shot.

 Part of Patriot Act Ruled Unconstitutional
 "Impermissibly vague, in violation of the First and Fifth Amendments"

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 A federal judge has declared unconstitutional a portion of the USA Patriot Act that bars
 giving expert advice or assistance to groups designated foreign terrorist organizations.

 The Humanitarian Law Project, which brought the lawsuit, said the plaintiffs were
 threatened with 15 years in prison if they advised groups on seeking a peaceful
 resolution of the Kurds' campaign for self-determination in Turkey.
 

 Can you believe that?
 Under Bush, you can get 15 years in prison ...for promoting peace?

 Look, if you're trying to take over thge world, you scare the shit out of everybody (9-11)
 then you scare the pink-ass gelding Democrats into signing all their powers over to Bush,
 who is supported by a law so broadly written that they can do anything they want - legally.

 As complicated as it is, it's very simple.
 Your local gang lords do this stuff every day - without the "legally."

 You've heard Joe Walsh's Rocky Mountain Way?

  Click  Here   to listen to "Rush" sing  Oxycotin Way

 Computergate

 A question for you to ponder, oh wise one with the terrible luck at poker:

"Which is worse - Republicans breaking into the Democrats computers
 for a year to steal their documents OR Republicans breaking into the
 Democrats hotel for one night to steal their documents?"

 The term Computergate seems more apposite than almost any other "-gate"
 that has been coined since the night of the plumbers.

 Here's a link for readers too young to know who the plumbers were or that
 the Republicans have been crooks for at least the last 32 years.

 http://www.polytechnic.org/faculty/gfeldmeth/chart.nixon.html

 Faun

 Quotes

"How out of touch is this man when he keeps painting us a pretty picture while doing nothing to make
  meaningful improvements in the lives of ordinary Americans?...When the president goes on in speeches
  about the bright economic picture, he just looks more and more out of touch. We know the truth, and
  many Americans unfortunately are feeling the truth in the own lives as they struggle to provide the
  day-to-day necessities for their families. It's time to go back to responsible economic policies that
  are fair for all Americans, not just corporate interests."
   --Barbra Streisand,  one of the few fighters for the majority    Attribution

 Lou H - thanks for the tape, but I need your e-mail address.

 Could you send that to sam@bartcop.com?

 Thanks for that.

 Isn't it amazing that after the BFEE said,

"Saddam has WMDs, we guarantee it,
  we know where they are, and we're willing
  to put our reputations on the line and that's a fact..."

 and when it turns out that they've were lying thru their Nazi teeth,
 the media and the gelding democrats refuse to call them on the fact
 that 512 soldiers have been killed by the lies they have told.
 

  ...and worse, doesn't it mean those brave soldiers died for no reason - other than Bush's greed for oil?

 Housekeeping

 We haven't forgotten about the State of the Union Contest.
 We did the judging on Radio Show 25 and that's up now.

 Of course, we'll do a print thing, too.

 Order your CDs today!
 Got no speakers in your computer?
 That's OK - these play in your car.

 BartCop Radio Shows on CD for just   $24

 Currently shipping shows 23, 24 and 25,  professionally mixed by Tommy Mack.

 Remember, if you PayPal, mention your address.

 Ashcroft: War Justified Even Without WMD

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Even if WMDs are never found in Iraq, the war was justified because it eliminated the threat
 that Saddam might again resort to "evil chemistry and evil biology," Ashcroft said Monday.
 

 Just like with impeachment, they were always going to go to war - no matter what.
 Bush had his eyes on tthat oil and by sacrificing hundreds of young lives - he could steal it
 The facts didn't matter and the evidence didn't matter - the crazy Bush boy wanted a war.

 It also reminds me that Kerry and Edwards KNEW Ashcroft was religiously insane when they
 confirmed him to be a blood-thirsty "Angel of Death" for the never-elected deserter. Each time Kerry
 says he'll get rid of Ashcroft, I remember he failed to block that abortion of common sense.

 And I haven't forgotten about the "secret society" that Kerry and the Disaster Monkey are in.
 Don't get me wrong, Kerry would be a much better president than the Monkey, but he and Bush
 share some "secrets" that we, as voters, don't need to know and I don't like that one damn bit.

 If Kerry wants to earn my vote, he should put the interests of the nation BEFORE his little "secret society."
 If Kerry has secrets that mean more to him than the Constitution, shouldn't we know that before we vote?

 I had a wild conversation with a stock expert today.
 He's a tight-assed Republican who's not too keen on Bush.

 He says the market is going up too high, too fast, and that the BIG money boys,
 are preparing to do exactly what we've been predicting for a long, long time.

 The BIG money boys haven't bought anything with their billions in Bush (Social Security) windfalls,
 because they're waiting for the BIG crash that's coming right after the rigged 2004 election.  I mean,
 why pay 20 cents on the dollar for a dying company when you can pay a nickel, say, a year from now?
 Bush is legally doing what his Justice Departmenty is accusing Martha Stewart of doing.

 Did you know Bush recently bought a LOT of oil at too-high a price to sink into the Strategic Petroleum Preserve,
 which raised a lot of eyebrows, but he's the president and it's his job to protect us from "terra."  What he's really
 doing, with the swipe of a pen, is raising and lowering the price of commodities.  Bush can cough and make
 commodities go up and down like a yo-yo, and the BFEE is making money going up and coming down each time.
 And unlike Martha Stewart, there's nobody on the planet who can arrest the BFEE for manipulating the markets.

 I asked "Stock boy" which commodities were primed to skyrocket and he said, "Gold and oil."

 Hmmm, ...gold and oil.

 The BFEE controls what, 75 percent of the oil on this planet right now?
 That estimate could be low.
 Any oil that moves over the high seas moves only with the BFEE's permission.

 Why, they could suddenly have an "Al Qaeda uprising" in the United Arab Emirates
 that would "disrupt shipping lanes" which could cause a barrel of gas to go to, say $60.

 ..

 Why, it could get "so dangerous" that all ships would have to have an escort by the US Navy ...or Halliburton.

 You know what that would do?
 It could put the big freeze on Japan and ...France.

 Get it?
 All Bush has to do is scream "Red Level Terror Alert" and prices will shoot thru the roof.

 I asked Stock boy if he knew about the BFEE indirectly owning 51 percent of Barrick Mining.
 He called it Barrick Gold, but he said he was unaware of the BFEE connection, like most people.

 So, as Tommy Mack would say, "Here's what's up."
 Bush has given all the important people, his friends, the super-rich and the Skull & Boners trillion dollar gifts subsidized
 by you and me, what we used to have in savings and the stock market, and by whatever your children can afford to pay.
 The super-rich are waiting for the right time to buy in, which is right after the BIG crash.

 Once the world economy crashes, the BFEE has trillions in cash reserves, so they can buy whatever can't be bombed,
 invaded, hijacked and stolen.  On top of that, they control both oil and gold. (not to mention the US military)

 So this rapid rise in the stock market is just Cheney laying a giant poker trap.  That's why the media keep saying it's
 a GREAT time to invest your life savings in the about-to-crash stock market.   They want us suckers to go "All in"
 on the market so we'll be penniless pawns when the BIG crash takes place.  They can hold off the crash for another year,
 by moving this and covering up that - just until when YOU are confident enough to put ALL your money in.

 I asked him what a defense for this would be, he said, "Buy a shitload of metal stocks and energy stocks."

 Disclaimer:
 It's entirely possible I don't know what the hell I'm talking about.
 PLEASE don't buy or sell anything because of what you read here.
 When you see something here, don't take action on my say so  -  investigate or maybe hedge.
 Don't follow my advice, just check out the odds about what I'm saying.
 All I want out of this is a "Bart was right," when it happens.
 

 If you're watching Bush's "meteoric" economy and Bush's stock market's "rocket," be sure to check your P/E ratio thing
 and only buy stocks with a low P/E - and be sure you're not buying something because everyone else is buying it.

 The BFEE is playing the biggest 3-card monte game in history, and they're very good at it.

 By the way, the big debate last night w/Spiderboy?

 He didn't even show up.

 Maybe he's smarter than I give him credit for.

http://www.thehuntingofthepresident.com

 Quotes

"It is becoming rather undignified for the Prime Minister to continue to insist that he was right all along
  when everybody can now see he was wrong.  We have got to drop this very dangerous doctrine under which
  we went to war on the basis of a pre-emptive strike.  If there was no threat from Iraq we obviously had no
  right to carry out a pre-emptive strike to remove that threat."
     --Former Cabinet Minister Robin Cook, challenging Tony Blair, who was still insisting as recently as last month
        that there is "massive evidence" of secret Iraqi laboratories and plans for missiles, concede his reasons for going
        to war were wrong following the David Kay disclosure that WMDs never existed,     Attribution

  Click  Here

 If you have something important send it to Sam at sam@bartcop.com

 If you work for Dean or Clark and want help punching up a speech, use that address.

 What did the oil companies know
 and when did they know it?
       by  Margie Burns

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 "At least in January, but much more likely in November or December of 2002.  Just lining up the extra tankers
  that would be required for doubling their imports must have been a time-consuming job for the oil companies,
  particularly if they   had to hire some of those tankers and consider what jobs were already scheduled for them.
  No doubt they had to pay a premium in order to have them at an Iraqi port on the date they would be required
  (maybe that's why our gas prices shot up)."

 The reader speculates that perhaps the administration "tipped off the oil companies" to increase their import stockpiles.
 As she asks, "How did the oil companies know they had to move that much oil in half a month?"

 This response brings to mind some related questions:  did the Vice President's office have continuing contacts with the
 "Energy Policy Task Force," even after our energy policy was formulated?  Did any contacts involve Iraq?

 Pokerfest Feedback

  Click  Here

 I believe the best time was had by the most responsible person in the whole gang.

 Dueling Quotes

"I quote from the Kay report: "Iraq's WMD programs spanned more than two decades,
  involved thousands of people, billions of dollars, and was elaborately shielded by security
  and deception operations that continued even beyond the end of Operation Iraqi Freedom."
  That is what the report said."
     --the Disaster Monkey, 10/03/03,   Attribution

"I don't think they exist. The fact that we found so far the weapons do not exist - we've got
  to deal with that difference and understand why. It's an issue of the capabilities of one's
  intelligence service to collect valid, truthful information."
     --David Kay, this week, calling Bush a liar   Attribution

 A gift for the Democrats

 Today's Democrats are so pitifully inept when it comes to a debate.
 We're right, the GOP is wrong, and calling them on it every time is very simple.

 Their latest "gotcha" question goes like this:

 They say, "Answer yes or no - are we safer with Saddam behind bars?"

 The truth is, it depends on the meaning of "safer."
 Is America safer with Billy the Pickpocket behind bars?
 Sure, but we wouldn't sacrifice 512 men to get Billy the Pickpocket, right?

 So, I propose the boomarang question to them:
 Is America safer with a stronger Saddam or with a weaker Saddam?

 They have no choice but to answer, "Weaker," so then you ask them,
"So why did Cheney spend the ninties selling Saddam over $20,000,000 worth
  of oil field equipment that made the petty tyrant and dictator ever stronger?

 See?

 It's so damn easy, anybody can beat up a Republican because we're right.

 My good friend Migs has become a grandfather.

 Woo Hoo!

 Subject: Jack Paar

 Jack Parr just died.

 We're between editions, so I went to our 20-something news editor and told him
 we'd like to run the obit and put a mug of him in the a1 rail.

"Who's Jack Paar?" he asked.

 Shocked, I replied: "He was Johnny Carson before Johnny Carson was Johnny Carson."

 To which the young'un said ... "Who's Johnny Carson?"

 Kate N

 Barry Crimmins  will be performing this Saturday night, January 31 in Hartford, Ct
 at the Real Art Ways Speak Out Extravaganza, hosted by Citizen Reno with special guests The Yes Men .

 This political variety show kicks off a year-long series of programming promoting political awareness.
 Co-sponsored by WHUS FM, Hartford Public Access TV and The Hartford Advocate.

 Check out www.speakoutct.org with Reno and The Yes Men. For details:  http://www.realartways.org/livearts_f.htm

 Sam,

 I just got a letter from Dubya thanking me for my $1 contribution
 -- so apparently I've drained his coffers by $3 or more...  LOL

 I just thought you'd like to know that it works!

 John

 What Price Glory?
   by Norma Sherry

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Are you better off now than you were four years ago?   Do you feel safer? Is your job more secure
 or are you among the more than three million workers without a job and without any hope of a job?
 Have you lost your pension or 401K due to corporate malfeasance? Author, Norma Sherry poses
 these questions and many more before she calls this administration on the carpet for lying to us,
 putting our loved ones in harm's way and she doesn't stop there. "Regrettably", she writes,
"we are not the great emancipators; we are not the envy of the world, nor is it our way of life
 and our love of freedom that our enemies detest. Our history is quite to the contrary."

 Subject: Who I'm voting for and why...

  Click  Here
 

 I'll bet your letter is in this pile.

 Sidebar:
 I think it was Daoud at the Pokerfest who kiddingly asked me if I was printing all these
 because it was easy to do, making a long job a little shorter and I admitted yes, it was,
 but it's also a damn good way to read what real people  are thinking without any filters.

These are real - not manufactured by the good puppy media owned by the B.F.E.E.

 We have a new address for advertisers - ads@bartcop.com

 Please send all  advertising  e-mails to ads@bartcop.com  and please,
 with every e-mail, send your name and URL and banner unless it's already been run..

 Monkey Mail

 Hey, what better than elect a man to handle the Iraq quagmire
 than one who's already orchestrated a highly questionable,
 unprovoked pre-emptive strike himself!

 Remember Kosovo, 98/99?
 Clark, NATO?
 Anti-war, sentiment?
 How quickly we forget ...

 jrt32@dana.ucc.nau.edu
 

 Excuse me, Mr. Monkey person, but you have the "facts" wrong.
 Nobody here has forgotten a damn thing.

 With whom was stopping genocide highly questionable?
 I mean, besides the Republicans who hated Clinton?

 And you say Kosovo was "unprovoked?"
 Are you a fan of mass murder?

 Clark was ordered by his president to handle that situation,
 and he did - without losing one, single soldier, which is the
 real reason you hate Clinton and Clark - because they make
 your Monkey leader look incompetent by losing 512 heroes.

 What medal did George W. Bush get for his Vietnam service?

 The IRA. "I Ran Away."

 Yesterday I received a spin-mail that was forwarded from the Republican department of mythmaking.
 They were trying to hide Bush minor's absence from Vietnam service as an urban legend. I decided to
 go to the original documents to check this out for myself since Michael Moore has been using the very
 strong term 'Deserter' for Bush. What did I find?

 It turns out that the debate should be on the correct word for Bush:
 Is he a deserter or a coward?

 Decide for yourself, here are some fair and balanced starting points. The raw documents are at:

 http://users.cis.net/coldfeet/document.htm

 Summary of the facts:
 http://www.washingtonpost.com/ac2/wp-dyn?pagename=article&node=&contentId=A59151-2000Jun25

 http://www.straightdope.com/columns/030411.html

 http://www.hereinreality.com/commander.html

 http://www.cnn.com/2000/ALLPOLITICS/stories/05/24/bushguard.cnn/index.html

 http://users.cis.net/coldfeet

 http://www.commondreams.org/views03/0531-03.htm

 http://www.AWOLbush.com

 Faun
 

 Dude, you're the best!

 Tech Issues

 As we step up the pace of , we have another expense:
 Tommy Mack says Show 24 took over 8 hours to assemble. Our conversation alone had 400 edits
 (We have to edit that much because I'm a small-brained person.)

 He says one reason it takes so long is because his Mac is a 1998 model.
 Think how much better and faster 2004 computers are than 1998 computers.

 He can cut that time in half if he gets a new Mac which is in the $2500-3000 neighborhood.
 I'm putting that on my Southwest Airlines VISA card today, and sure, I'll have thirty days
 before they start charging interest - in case you wanted to help us out with a donation.

 If you'd care to donate, you could contribute via PayPal by  Clicking  Here
 If you prefer paper checks or the US mail, please send to bartcop.com  PO Box 54466   Tulsa, OK  74155

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 Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!

 You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
 That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at The Jointon your next American tour.

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