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 America where are you now?
 Don't you care about your sons and daughters?
 Don't you know we need you now?
 We can't fight alone against this monster

by Bruce Yurgil http://home.earthlink.net/~ifness/index.html      Back Issues  Contact us Your Ad Here The Forum The Reader Perkel's Blog Bart Cook Bart Stocks LINKS 2004 Live CHAT Project 60 Stickers Bart Sports Bart Store BC Entertainment thehuntingofthepresident.com

In Today's Treehouse... Dean Replaces Trippi Bush changes gears  We See That Now Dennis Miller's 'ethics' Attack on Scrooge McDuck Baghdad Is Bush's Blue Dress Democrats: Stop Wesley Clark! Franken tackles Dean heckler  GOP Goose is cooked Quote of the Day "I do not think my impartiality could    reasonably be questioned."     --Justice Antonin Scalia, the man who put his    Republican good friends into the White House    after the Democrats got more votes.  Attribution

Support Bartcop.com PO Box 54466 , Tulsa, OK 74155PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com

 Quotes

"A Justice must examine the question of recusal on his own even without a motion,
  and any party to a case may file a motion to recuse. And anyone at all is free to criticize
  the action of a Justice -- as to recusal or as to the merits -- after  the case has been decided.
   --Chief Justice Renhquist, using a lot of extra words to say, "Suck me, we do what we want." Attribution
 

  Quotes

"Federal law says a judge should disqualify himself in any proceeding where his impartiality could reasonably
 be questioned. Scalia has resisted...There is no higher authority to review Scalia's decision. But a private,
 out-of-state getaway is different from a chat at a cocktail party. And Cheney is not an incidental party to
 the lawsuit: It was he who convened the task force, believed to have been top-heavy with industry players,
 and he who kept the meetings secret. And who paid for the private jet that whisked Scalia to Louisiana?
 The Times said it was the owner of an oil services company. Scalia has been hopelessly compromised."
   --Editorial, Newsday.com, "Scalia Mustn't Sit in Judgment of His Hunting Buddy",   Attribution
 

 When are people going to understand that these thugs have taken over?

 They don't care what it looks like - they have absolute power.

 Doesn't anybody remember what they did in decmber 2000?
 The Whore Court said, "Screw the will of the voters, we like Bush & Cheney."

 Why is this a surprise to anyone?

 Dean Replaces Trippi
  Top aide credited with Dean's meteoric rise

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Howard Dean shook up campaign Wednesday,  replacing campaign manager
 Joe Trippi with Roy Neal, a former Washington lobbyist tied to Al Gore.

 Dean announced that Neel would take the new position during a staff meeting, but aides
 who were present said he did not mention Trippi's departure. Trippi then came in and
 tearfully told his staff that he was leaving while encouraging them to stay.

"Howard Dean is the guy who is going to fight for the country for real change and I
 hope people stick with him," Trippi said as he left campaign headquarters with his wife,
 Kathy Lash, who also worked for Dean.

"I'm out of the campaign, but I'm not out of the fight," he said.
"We need to change America."

  Quotes

"If you want somebody to repair your roads, educate your kids, or purify your water supply,
  you may want to turn to private enterprise, but if you want massive fuckloads of your enemies
  wiped out in record time, Uncle Sam is the man for you."
   -- Dennis Miller, first shop on CGOP, proving Bush worshippers have a heart

 Bush changes gears in re-election bid
  Aiming at Kerry now, instead of Dean

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 There is debate within Bush's administration and inside his re-election HD
 about how hard to strike at Kerry, who won Iowa and New Hampshire.

 Some of Bush's political advisers take credit for successfully tarring Dean
 as an angry liberal, and are now suffering a kind of buyer's remorse.
 They wonder whether their criticism fueled the rise of Kerry - a more
 formidable candidate, in the estimation of some campaign officials.

 He is a decorated Vietnam War veteran, knowledgeable about domestic
 and foreign affairs, and has a certain gravitas and strength as a debater.
 

 I think they're sorry they turned their hate/destroy media machine on Dean too early.
 They've put the mega-experienced war hero in Dean's place.

 Quotes

"What was it about the look on Bush's face while he delivered the State of the Union address?
  That grin, I thought as I watched the president of all the people. It seemed infuriatingly familiar.
  But why? Then it came to me. I've seen grins like that on the faces of men who have just bluffed me
  out of a big pot at the poker table with nothing in their hands. Bush may be president of the people,
  but he is not president by the people. Most Americans who voted in the 2000 election cast their
  ballots for someone else. He is president because a majority of one on the Supreme Court decided
  he should be. No wonder the man's grinning. He has taken that fluke and turned it into a mandate
  to change America militarily, diplomatically, economically and culturally. The address and the grin
  with which it was delivered were reminders of all that."
     --G. Jefferson Price III,     Attribution
 

 He has a good point.
 Bush got caught in a global-sized lie that has killed over 500 men - and nobody has even raised their voice.

 ...but when the intern blew Clinton, America was so outraged we had to impeach.

 That's why Bush is smirking - he knows he can do anything and nobody will say a word.

 Sunday, Howard Dean the full hour on Meet the Whore.

 What will Russert want to talk about?

 Subject: Kerry's 'vulnerability'

 The talking heads are saying that Kerry is vulnerable because he voted for the war in Iraq.
 Unless Kerry is guided by a moron here is how this goes down:

 Media whore: "Senator Kerry, how can you be critical of the President when you voted to go to war in Iraq?"

 Senator Kerry: "I voted to go to war in Iraq because Bush swore that he had evidence that Saddam was behind 911,
 that Saddam had an alliance with the Taliban, that Saddam had weapons of mass destruction, and that Saddam tried
 to obtain nuclear material from Africa. It was later that everyone learned that Bush LIED to Congress, LIED to the
 American people, LIED to the United Nations, and LIED to our Allies. Had we known that Bush intentionally LIED
 to us we would not have supported this illegal and dangerous war."

 Ooh, that was a tough one.

 Lewis Grove
 

 I scream at the TV a lot.
 In that last NH debate, when this came up, I wanted Kerry to say,
"Bush looked me in the eye and lied. He said Saddam could hit the East Coast in 45 minutes.
  With the safety of America at risk, I didn't think this president would lie, but he did - right to my face.
  Now 513 men are dead and this president should answer for his lies."

 I'm not saying politicians should speak like I do, but why can't they talk straight?
 Every word that comes out of every politician's mouth sounds like it's been screened by a team
 of 50 Harvard-educated speech writers, but they never talk in frank and simple words. I wonder why.

 We See That Now

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 And yes, it's true, just as your more sagacious radio hosts have maintained: Hillary Clinton
 does owe her success to the practice of witchcraft. And no, it's not true that ridiculing Chelsea
 at the most vulnerable stage in her development was the media equivalent of child molestation.
 Chelsea Clinton was fair game because she is the spawn of Satan.

 Dennis Miller's Defense: Ethics Don't Apply to Him

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Though from all descriptions, the show is intended to focus heavily on news and politics,
 Miller has suggested that rules against journalistic conflicts of interest don't apply to him.
 "I don't have the vaguest pretension to journalistic ethics, I'm a comedian..."

 On the other hand, AP reported (1/25/04) that Miller indicated that "he's not making a comedy show."
"I don't want it to be a screaming shriekfest," Miller said. "I want it to be a pretty reasoned discourse."
 CNBC, of course, is not Comedy Central, but a cable news channel specializing in business reporting.

 Four more years?

 Just 3 years ago the Congressional Budget Office was projecting 10 years of surpluses.
 Under Clinton we dreamed about paying off the national debt by the end of the decade.

 Now they are projecting 10 years of deficits with this year's deficity setting another
 record - one half trillion dollars on the red. Cheney says that deficits don't matter.
 Having gone from the biggest surplus in the history of the world to the biggest deficit
 in the history of the world in just 3 years make me wonder why Bush is even running again.

 I'm scared to think what America will be like with 4 more years of Bush.

 Marc Perkel
 San Francisco, CA.

 Note: If you'd like to say who you're voting for and explain why, send it to  bartcop@bartcop.com

 A couple of rules:
Send plain text only - no html or crazy fonts or colors.
Make it short, 2-3 paragraphs, and write it yourself - don't copy and paste.

 Quotes

"Independent media serves a democratic society. It is so critical to have independent media
  in a time of war because we need to have a discussion about the most important issues of the day
  - issues of war and peace, life and death. When that forum is not provided, it does a disservice to
  the servicemen and women of this country who are sent to kill or be killed overseas since they
  can't have these discussions on military bases. What we see now is that the media in this country
  has reached an all-time low having a media embedded in the power structure."
     --Amy Goodman, of Democracy Now!    Attribution     Saw it on Buzzflash.com

 Hi Bart

 Volume 1243 -  Grave Digger, had a quote about bush sticking pencils on the ceiling.

 Well, the quote was a fictionalized account of the goings-on at the White House written by this funny guy.
 I followed the link and he also mentions him being featured at bartcop.
 But it seems his fans are not impressed with your Okie humor.

 Sample some of the comments posted:

"Wow. Another idiot that doesn't get your site at all. Why am I not surprised."

 (For the record, I never visited the site.)

"I have a serious question about bartcop. Since the addition of flouride to our drinking water,
 how do we keep breeding these fucktards?!"

"I've scrapped stuff of the bottom of my shoe that had more cognitive thought processes then Bartcop."

 I laughed at this though:

"Is it just me, or does the guy's website look like a 1998 GeoCities page?

 "Also, I think (though I'm not sure) that BartCop might not like George W. Bush very much.
 The message is subtle, but I believe that's the correct interpretation."

 hey but bart, I love your website and the work you're doing!
 Keep on hammering
 B
 

 B, they can be as "unimpressed" as they want, but you won't find
 any of them willing to take a red-assing in a debate in a live chat room.

 Quotes

"I don't know what I think of George W. Bush when he first got in,
  but I've grown fond of the man, and maybe it's the times we live in.
 They say he's not an environmentalist.
 But every time I see his ranch on TV, it looks pretty nice.
 You know something, if we all took care of our own, we'd have a great environment."
   -- Dennis Miller, who just can't be this stupid, on his first CGOP show
 

 Dennis, are you saying he left a sweet taste in your mouth?

 State of the Union Contest Winners

 The first of two third place winners getting 90 days of BCR is Liz with:

 The second of two third place winners getting 90 days of BCR is Joann with:

 Second prize - and 6 month's worth of BCR and membership goes to William K for:

 First prize - and a year's worth of BCR and membership goes to Claypatch for:

 All who entered a digital photo will get 30 days for their efforts.
 On  bartcop.com,  the only loser is the host.

 Order your CDs today!
 Got no speakers in your computer?
 That's OK - these play in your car.

 BartCop Radio Shows on CD for just   $24

 Currently shipping shows 23, 24 and 25,  professionally mixed by Tommy Mack.

 Remember, if you PayPal, mention your address.

 Attack on Scrooge McDuck
    by Gene Lyons,    January 28, 2004

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 By invading Iraq under false pretenses, he thinks, the U.S. rid the world of a despicable tyrant
 at the expense of its fundamental credibility. When President Bush uses farcically Orwellian
 doublespeak like "weapons of mass destruction-related program activities" to describe Saddam's
 non-existent military threat, he doesn't even expect to be believed by any but the dullest voters.
 And when Bush boasts, as he did in his State of the Union speech, that "no one can now doubt
 the word of America," and that he "will never seek a permission slip to defend the security of
 our country," he doesn't mean that Iraq's imaginary links to 9/11 have been proven. He means
 that any nation he threatens had better back down.

 You wrote:

"Disclaimer:
 It's entirely possible I don't know what the hell I'm talking about.
 PLEASE don't buy or sell anything because of what you read here.
 When you see something here, don't take action on my say so  -
investigate or maybe hedge.
 Don't follow my advice, just check out the odds about what I'm saying.
 All I want out of this is a "Bart was right," when it happens. "
 

 Wasn't that totally unnecessary, since as you repeatedly remind us, and we already know:
 "Bartcop.com is a comedy site! "

 mrk
 

 Right, I just don't want someone changing their portfolio on my say-so.

 James Brown arrested again

 ..
   "It's a frame-up."

 The 'Godfather of Soul,' James Brown, shown here in a booking photograph, was arrested January 28, 2004
 on suspicion of committing domestic violence, South Carolina law enforcement officials said. Brown, 70, who
 has had several run-ins with the law and spent time in prison, is being held at the Aiken County Detention Center
 and was due to appear at a bond hearing on Thursday,

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:.
 Now, can we talk of impeachment? The rueful admission by David Kay that Saddam did not possess WMDs
 or the means to create them at the time of the U.S. invasion confirms the fact that the Bush administration is
 complicit in arguably the greatest scandal in U.S. history. It's only because the Republicans control both houses
 of Congress that we hear no calls for a broad-ranging investigation of the type that led to the discovery of
 Monica Lewinsky's infamous blue dress.

 In no previous instance of presidential malfeasance was so much at stake, both in preserving constitutional
 safeguards and national security. This egregious deception in leading us to war on phony intelligence overshadows
 those scandals based on greed, such as Teapot Dome during the Harding administration, or those aimed at political
 opponents, such as Watergate. And the White House continues to dig itself deeper into a hole by denying reality
 even as its lieutenants one by one find the courage to speak the truth.

 Quotes

"Most of the problems in the modern world are not suited to unilateral solutions.
  I believe we cooperate when we can and act alone when we must.
  The GOP believes we should act alone when we can and cooperate
  when we must. There is a significant difference."
    -- Best president we ever had,   Attribution
 

 Exchange

 Wesley Clark: My view of patriotism for a president is to do everything you can to keep the country safe.
                         What we know, Wolf, is that, before 9/11, President Bush did not do everything he could
                          to keep this country safe. And we can increasingly see that, after 9/11, he's taken us to
                          a war that we didn't have to fight.

 Wolf  Whore: Well, you could argue that President Clinton also for eight years didn't do everything
                          he could to keep the country safe.      Attribution
 

 No, you can't argue that, because Clinton didn't take another monthlong vacation right after intelligence told him
 Al Qaeda was about to attack us with airplanes, and Clinton didn't lie America into a years-long nonsense war where
 thousands of soldiers may be killed. Bush had a chance to catch bin Laden but went after Saddam, instead.
 Blitzer wants you to think Clinton and Bush are the same, but it's just not true.

Reminder: Clinton never sent a man into battle who didn't come home.

 The networks will do anything to protect and defend the Never-elected Fraud.

  Click  Here

 Barry Crimmins

  Click  Here

 If you have something important send it to Sam at sam@bartcop.com

 If you work for Dean, Kerry or Clark and want help punching up a speech, use that address.

 Democrats: Stop Wesley Clark!
   by Piggy Noonan, (R-Easy) who's concerned about us Democrats

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Is he . . . normal?
 Is he stable and adult and experienced?
 

 ha ha
 Compared to the incompetent Disaster Monkey?

 Al Franken tackles Dean heckler

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"I would have done it if he was a Dean supporter at a Kerry rally," he said.
"I'm neutral in this race but I'm for freedom of speech, which means people
 should be able to assemble and speak without being shouted down."

..

 Hey it looks bad for you democrats this election.
 Clark can't remember what he says from month to month,
 Dean is consistent but can't control his mouth and Kerry voting
 record proves he's more left than Teddy (I need some scotch) Kennedy.

 Ready for this?

 Prayer is beating you.

 Mr. Needzaboot
 

 Needza, sure, the Democrats could find a way to lose to the Disaster Monkey,
 but it won't be because some Invisible Cloud Being ordained it.

 BTW, if God is on your side, and I kick your sorry ass,
 does that mean that I beat up God?

 To:  mail@democracynow.org

 You sent out this wildly inflammable headline:

"Clark Admits Targeting Civilians In Yugoslavia,"

 but when I clicked on it, you changed it to,

"We confronted Clark"

 I was a subscriber, but your bait-and switch crap is helping Bush and
 I won't subscribe to a site that's going to tell lies and help that Bush bastard.

 Christ, I run a comedy site and I have more credibility than you.

 I'm a busy man, and if I feel like a handjob I don't want it from a wild-ass,
 bait-and-switch, dishonest pro-Bush site like  democracynow.org.

 If you can't explain yourself before I go to press, I'm going to slam your
 Dennis Miller-style ethics and you can take me off your subscriber list.

 I see Clark as Bush's worst nightmare, so stop lying about the General.
 By the way, did Karl Rove pay you in silver or German marks?

 bart
 bartcop.com
 FIGHTING Bush, not helping him

 Quotes

"Wesley Clark is an absolute nut case. He's unhinged each and every day.
  He's the next guy to go mental. It's going to happen at some point."
    --Rush Limbaugh, explaining who the Fascists fear most    Attribution

 Dennis Miller - ho extraordinaire

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 While Miller was lamenting that the Worldcom scandal "ends up shafting the little guy, not the billionaire CEO,"
 he was undoubtedly pocketing a CEO-sized payoff for the same ads that FTC Chairman Robert Pitofsky said
 were either deliberately "confusing to consumers" or an "outright deception" aimed at fleecing the little guy.
 

 This article says Miller did commercials for Worldcom, he did commericials for DirectTV (Rupert Murdoch),
 he's worked for FOX News and now he's shilling for Bush at CGOP, all the while maintaining that he's
 "fair and balanced and shooting it straight down the middle."

 ...will America buy his horseshit?

  ...by the ton?

 Dueling Quotes

"If the Americans go in and overthrow Saddam Hussein and it's clean, he has nothing,
  I will apologize to the nation, and I will not trust the Bush administration again."
     -- Bill O'Reilly on Good Morning America, March 18, 2003
 

 "Never trust a promise made by a whore."
     -- BartCop,  bartcop.com

 Subject: Bush the liar

 Does anyone else find this insane?

 George W. Bush, at a press conference in Poland this week said, "We went to the United Nations, of course,
 and got an overwhelming resolution -- 1441 -- unanimous resolution, that said to Saddam, you must disclose and
 destroy your weapons programs, which obviously meant the world felt he had such programs. He chose defiance.
 It was his choice to make, and he did not let us in."

 Forget the part about what "the world felt" and consider that this is the second time he has made this weird statement
 about inspection access, as if Hans Blix and  UNMOVIK had never existed, nor conducted the most intrusive weapons
 inspections ever done in Iraq. (The first time was last July, when Bush said in the presence of an astonished Kofi Annan:
 "And we gave [Saddam] a chance to allow the inspectors in, and he wouldn't let them in.")

 Gdewan
 

 The press simply refuses to print the truth, which is Bush ordered the weapons inspectors OUT of Iraq
 so he could satisfy his raging hardon to bomb, kill and destroy a country that was fully contained militarily.

 Everybody know that, but the good puppy press dares not print the truth.
 Many other nations have a free press, so those citizens know the real story.

 ...but not the United States.

 GOP Goose is Cooked
      by Alan Bisbort

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"First, the caucuses and primary both inspired record voter turnout and a surge among college-aged voters,
 a trend that, if continued into November, could mean bad news for the Republican Party. This is especially
 bad news for Bush. Not only did Democratic doings bury his State of the Union Address, but he lost his final
 chance to set the agenda going into the election. His recycled litany of tired cliches ("stay the course"), fraudulent
 policies (privatizing Social Security, tax givebacks to the rich), fear-mongering and broken dreams went over
 like ice cream in Antarctica.

 Secondly, the results are proof that the pundits -- none of whom came close to predicting them -- are, as I've
 long suspected, pulling stuff out of their asses on a 24-hour, 7-day-a-week basis. I have this recurrent fantasy
 that all these people, from Tim Russert to Matt Drudge to Sean O'Hannity-reilly-coulter to even "respected"
 journalists like Dan Rather and Bob Schieffer are machines whose brains have been replaced with harmless
 mush wired directly to Karl Rove's red phone. Every time he rings them up, their brains scream: INCOMING!
 Their lips begin to move, and the words that come out of their mouths are market-tested White House fabrications."

 Quotes

"Well, there's Dennis Miller on his new show looking fit and dandy and mightily conservative.
  And he's even trying to justify his newfound love for machismo and unfettered love of country
  and hatred of terorists. And he promised he'll be hard on assholes and gentle on sincereists(?)
  and he'll give the Moron a pass because he's loyal to his pals. Now, I just have to wonder why
  CNBC figured America needed just one more Right Wing jerkoff to pollute the airwaves.
        --Bob Witkowski,  At Wit's End

 We have a new address for advertisers - ads@bartcop.com

 Please send all  advertising  e-mails to ads@bartcop.com  and please,
 with every e-mail, send your name and URL and banner unless it's already been run..

 Dear Bartcop:

 So you are afraid of a little virtual anger over a photo of Mrs. Ashrawi?

 Where did you read that I was afraid?
 I said it's a no-win situation that turns friends into enemies.
 How many shares of that stock do you think I should buy?
 

 She lives in a neighborhood where people get killed for speaking out.
 Killed by Palestinians or killed by Israelis, dead is dead. As much of
 a stand up guy as I think you are, you don't hold a candle to this
 wonderful woman when it comes to standing up and saying the right thing.

 I never said any of that - where are you reading this crazy talk?

(You see how illogical people get when this subject comes up?)
 

 In a part of the world that is officially insane with violence and hate, she is an
 absolutely fearless voice of reason and for peace. Why she hasn't won the
 Nobel Peace Prize yet is beyond me. Even if you can never find the courage
 to put her photo holding your logo on the main page, say a prayer for her safety,
 even if you are an atheist.

 Dan White
 

 Dan, it's not a matter of "courage," that piece went on a little long.

 ...and which God would you suggest I pray to?

 Wait - let me guess the "real" God?

 Radio Computer Fund Drive

 As we step up the pace of , we have another expense:
 Tommy said Show 26 took over 12 hours to assemble. Our three-way conversation
 alone had almost 800 edits  (We have to edit that much for two reasons: (1) I'm a small-brained person
 (2) We did an one-time, alcohol-fueled marathon that needed massive editing and re-editing.

 His Mac is a 1998 model.
 2004 Macs are much, much faster than 1998 computers.

 With his new G5 Mac, he can cut that time in half if he gets a new G5 Mac.
 (Hey - all you Applets - I finally bought a Mac! :)

 $3678 - total cost of new package.
 $  543 - amount raised  - with 28 days to go.

 I put that $3678 on my Southwest Airlines VISA card Wednesday, the 28th.
 They give thirty days grace before they start charging interest - if you want to help.

 If you'd care to donate, you could contribute via PayPal by Clicking  Here
 (Oddly, it helps if you send an abby-normal amount, like $49 instead of $50)

 If you prefer paper checks in the US mail, please send to
 bartcop.com  PO Box 54466   Tulsa, OK  74155

 We're assembling Show 26 now.
 So far, it has a Dennis Miller beatdown and a true life and death gamble.

  Subscribe today!

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 It had  everything.

 Copyright © 2004, bartcop.com

..
 

 Shrl, call  The BartPhone,  just to say "Hi!"
 Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!

 You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
 That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at The Jointon your next American tour.

 bartcop.com  and BartCop are trademarks of attempts at humor.