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 America where are you now?
 Don't you care about your sons and daughters?
 Don't you know we need you now?
 We can't fight alone against this monster...

Bruce Yurgil  http://home.earthlink.net/~ifness/index.html If I ever hit it big, I'm taking Bruce Yurgil with me. Back Issues  Contact us Your Ad Here The Forum The Reader Perkel's Blog Bart Cook Bart Stocks     LINKS 2004 Live CHAT Project 60 Stickers Bart Sports Bart Store BC Entertainment thehuntingofthepresident.com MikeMalloy Petition

In Today's Treehouse... Kerry: Bush stonewalling The long, blinding road to war Scalia's anti-gay speech  Iraqis sign interim constitution 551 the wrong body count  Busier than a busy beaver Monkey misuses 9-11 victims The subpoena list of rats Bush's first TV ads Quote of the Day "As a firefighter who spent months at Ground    Zero, it's deeply offensive to see Bush use    these images to capitalize on the greatest    American tragedy of our time."    --Tom Ryan, a 20-year veteran of FDNY Attribution

Support Bartcop.com PO Box 54466 , Tulsa, OK 74155PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com

 Quotes

"If Kerry had his way, Saddam Hussein would still be in power in Iraq threatening America.
  Maybe he was hoping Saddam would lose the election in Iraq.'
   -- the never-elected Monkey Attribution

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 John Kerry accused Bush of "stonewalling" inquiries into 9-11 and Iraqi WMDs.

"Why is this administration stonewalling and resisting the investigation into what happened and why
  we had the greatest security failure in the history of our country?  The American people deserve an
  answer now. The immediate instinct of the Republicans and this administration was to shut it down."
 

 Damn, ...Kennedy on Friday and then Kerry over the weekend?
 Suddenly, we're seeing signs of sacin the wimpy-ass party of scared losers?
 Guys, I love seeing this, but where the fuck have you been the last three years?
 Have the Senate democrats found  bartcop.com?
 

 Sidebar:
 I kid about things like that, but after three years of groveling on their knees for Captain Hijack,
 if the Democrats finally grow a pair, can we rule out the influence of dozens of  bartcop.com  readers?
 The best we could hope for was that bartcop.com  broke some camel's back, but I'd like to hear the story.

 But if life is Pacino's Scarface, ... when the two slugs in the nightclub start firing machine pistols in the middle
 of Belzer's stand-up act,  if  I advised Tony Montana to fall under the cocktail table and whip out his firearm
 and look for two pairs of pants not running in a panic, and then shooting the kneecaps of the two culas ...and
 then he does that, ...it's probably immodest of me to ask if Tony Montana reads  bartcop.com

 Sorry, the ego-beast gets out more often than I'd like.

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"Want to step outside and chat for a minute?" asked Maj. Gen. David H. Petraeus.

 We stood 15 feet beyond the tent flap. I blinked at the swirling dust, and felt grit between my molars.
 When Petraeus turned to face me, I was alarmed to see how troubled his blue eyes were.
"This thing is turning into shit," he said. "The 3 ID" -- the 3rd Infantry Division, fighting just ahead of
 the 101st around Najaf -- "is in danger of running out of food and water. They lost two Abrams and
 a Bradley last night, although they got the crews out. The corps commander sounds tired."

 "No one really saw this coming, did they?" I said.

"No," he replied. No prewar estimates had anticipated a defense of Najaf by Iraqi regular army or
 Republican Guard troops, nor did those estimates predict stiff resistance from paramilitary forces.
"We did worst-case scenarios, where the enemy really put up a fight, but no one took it very seriously.
 We need to get lucky. The CIA really needs to pull one out."
 

 I feel bad for the general - he probably just lost his stars.
 The BFEE doesn't like anyone telling the truth about Bush's failed and bloody war.

 Quotes

"It is indisputable based on everything we know that the U.S. played a very direct and public role
  in pressuring Aristide to leave office by making it clear that the united States would do nothing to
  protect him from the armed thugs who (were) threatening to kill him. His choice was simple:
  Stay in Haiti with no protection from the international community, including the U.S., and be
  killed or you can leave the country. That is hardly what I would call a voluntary decision to leave."
    --Sen. Christopher Dodd,  (D-Usually very quiet)   Attribution

 Quotes

''Frankly, Mr. Mayor, I think your new hairstyle is the right way to go.
  After all, in Washington, the coverup is always worse than the truth.''
     --Hillary to Rudy Giuliani at the annual Gridiron Dinner,  Attribution

 Subject: Kerry and Bush

 Do 'ya really think that replacing Bush with Kerry is going to bring our troops home?
 Think again...

 Kerry is just another reincarnation of LBJ.
 LBJ also believed that war is "good."

 http://antiwar.com/orig/pilger.php?articleid=2089

 You're getting "Sold Down the River" Bart.
 Dan
 

 Dan, what a wild a crazy thing to say.
 Is this your first visit to  bartcop.com?
 The problem is not my thinking or my being naive.

 The reason OUR boys are dying is because Bush is stealing that oil.
 If the UN or NATO gets involved, they'll demand to see the books.
 Bush won't show them the books so we're going this alone.

 If Kerry gets elected is allowed to assume the presidency after winning,
 he's not going to be stealing $50,000,000 a day from the Iraqis.

 Kerry has no reason to keep the books secret, so he can invite the UN
 to come in and replace our troops, which they'll do if they get a piece of the pie.

 Since Bush runs the only superpower, no country can tell him to stop stealing.
 Withe the media and the democrats covering up for Bush - who can stop him?

 Bottom line - If Kerry becomes president, the oil scam is over so the UN
 will come in and share the wealth and the contracts and our boys can come home.
 The BFEE is getting richer with every dead body that's flown back from Baghdad.

 ...and you think I'm being sold down the river?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 As the Supreme Court was weighing a landmark gay rights case last year, Scalia gave a
 speech in Philadelphia for an advocacy group waging a legal battle against gay rights.

 Scalia addressed the $150-a-plate dinner hosted by the Urban Family Council two months after
 hearing oral arguments in a challenge to a Texas law that made gay sex a crime.  A month after
 the dinner, he sharply dissented from the high court's decision overturning the Texas law. .
 

 So, we have a Supreme Copurt justice who can be bought.
 Is this news to anybody who was alive in the year 2000?

 Like most BFEE associates, he openly flaunts his position because he knows the Democrats won't
 raise their voices because they're just too scared.  If Scalia can make a few hundred thousand a year
 making screw-the-gays speeches, why should be bother to cover up the fact that he's a gay hater?
.

 Quotes

"A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic."
   --Joseph Stalin,  Attribution
 

 ...and 551 needless, senseless deaths of America's bravest young people gets
 "A job well done, Mr. President. We want you to do this four more years."

 Iraqis sign interim constitution

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 After months of negotiation and a last-minute walkout by some members, Iraq's Governing Council
 will sign a constitution today that will allow Iraqis to govern themselves and protect individual rights.

''We will sign the interim constitution on Monday as it stands,'' Ibrahim Mohamed Bahr al-Uloum said Sunday.

 A Shiite Muslim, he is the son and chief adviser to the president of the council. He spoke after a Shiite
 delegation met with Iraq's senior Shiite cleric, Grand Ayatollah Ali al-Sistani, and reported winning his
 approval to sign despite some misgivings.
 
 

 The Iraq people know how "compassionate" Bush is and how "concerned" he is that Iraq
 gets a legal and binding constitution on their timetable, not his - and did you know pigs can fly?.

 I'll tell you exactly what happened.
 A undercover spook put a gun to Ibrahim Mohamed Bahr al-Uloum's head and assured him
 that either his brains or his signature would be on that constitution in the next 15 seconds.

 It's actually quite easy to make decisions when your options are made very clear.

 Spalding Gray's Body Found

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 The body of actor-writer Spalding Gray was pulled from the East River over the weekend,
 two months after he walked out of his Manhattan apartment and disappeared. He was 62.

 Gray, who laid bare his life and mingled performance art with comedy in acclaimed monologues
 like "Swimming to Cambodia" and "It's a Slippery Slope," was identified Monday .

 Quotes

"The only real problem that the 9/11 Commission has faced is the lack of cooperation from the White House.
  What could possibly be the reason for this stonewalling by the White House? It is as if a whole swath of the
  Washington establishment has completely forgotten the horror of the terrorist attacks that killed 3,000
  innocent people. But the American people have not forgotten. The American people have their priorities
  straight. They place getting at the truth of how that tragedy was carried out above election year politics."
     --Sen. Robert Byrd (D-Sac), criticizing Dubya for undermining the independence of the commission
       studying failures in prewar intelligence while stonewalling the 9/11 commission,  Attribution

 Bush: Don't use my husband as your mascot
   A 9/11 widow's letter to Bush about his new bragging campaign

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"My husband, Luis Eduardo Torres, was at his second day of work at Cantor Fitzgerald on 9-11.
 He jumped from the 105th floor of the North Tower. Most of his upper body was recovered,
 identifiable only through dental records. I was seven months pregnant at the time...

 The flags were intended to honor ground zero and the remains of the dead, but here they are merely props,
 used to add a powerful patriotic punch to your message. The tower and the corpse are two hideously broken
 and disfigured things behind and under the flag, and your image -- with your red tie, white shirt, and blue suit,
 standing in front of thick strong white columns -- serves as another, symbolic, flag.

 That image of ground zero, and the body shrouded with the flag, reminded me of the sulfur from the few
 pathetic remnants of my husband's last day: his Cantor ID, Debitchek Meal Card and subway Metrocard.

 I thought I'd finished dealing with the gruesome aspects of his dead body, but it came back to me during your commercial."
 

 These SOBs don't care about anything but the billions they are stealing.
 To continue stealing these billions, they have to remain in power and they'll do anything
 to keep that gravy train coming because the trillions they've stolen are not enough.

 Subject: peach trucks

 Hey Bart,

 When I was flying to Philly last week for the Big Trade Show, we had terrible turbulence
 during one of the flights. My coworker said to me, "How can you be so calm during all this?"

 I replied, "Everybody has a peach truck with their name on it, so I have a good time every day."
 She gave me 'the eyebrow' and I laughed and said, "If the peach truck finds me up here, what
 choice do I have but to go down with a shot of Maker's Mark in my hand?"
 So I flagged down the drinks cart and got us 2 more.

 Thanks for that attitude Bart, I needed that.
 Michele Bartcook

 Quotes

"The Justice Department right now is the biggest threat to personal liberty in the country."
    --Dick Armey, who seems to have turned partly sane now that he has no power   Attribution

 Subject: your web site

 I love your site. But I can never think of anything witty enough or smart enough
 to send in that may end up as a snippet on your page.

 I have a few words to people who read your page every day, and contribute nothing.
 I am a recent member. But what really is a sawbuck a month? People will spend that amount on the
 lastest CD or movie that comes out because thier favorite band or movie star did something entertaining.

 How about youse guys putting that amount of money out once a month to someone who is trying his damnedest
 to make the world wake up so we can all lead better lives. You can give $8.50 to see "Starsky and Hutch," and
 pay $20 for a small coke and popcorn and watch a crappy movie. Or you can actually be entertained by something
 that may actually stimulate your mind. I know where I'm putting my money.

 Your Friend,
 Paul C
 

 Paul, thanks.
 I agree.

 551 the wrong figure for Bush Iraqi body count
  This says we've really lost 1188

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"If a soldier is completely dismembered by a bomb, then he is dead. Likewise, if a soldier is hit by a full burst
 of machine-gun fire, then he also is dead. The problems start when the medic [on the ground] is not quite sure
 whether the injured soldier is dead or not. We all like to save life if possible, so if the medic believes there is the
 faintest glimmer of hope, the injured soldier is sent immediately to the nearest [medical] aid station."

"The split-second that soldier is removed from contact [wherever the incident took place], he is officially listed
 as 'wounded', regardless of whether he then dies 3 seconds or minutes or hours or days or months later, as a
 direct result of injuries sustained in the contact. Deaths in transit to the U.S., or after soldiers return home are
 also excluded completely, or become 'accidental deaths'. This is how Wolfowitz and his people massage the
 figures, and how the American public is misled."
 

 Is this why nobody is allowed to see the coffins come home - because someone might count them?

 I wish we hade a free press that could look into this possible mega-scandal.
 I wish the Democrats had the courage to raise this question on live TV.

 Am I asking too much?

 Subject: radio feedback

 Hi Bart,
 I liked the new shows (#26, 27 & 28) although I wondered if you were making that thing up
 with Dennis Miller having a monkey on his show.  It sounded too weird.

 No, I saw it myself - he had a monkey in his lap.
 

 The sound quality is much better than the previous CDs I've gotten from you and I like listening to the news review
 with you and Tommy Mack.  I'm not interested in downloading the radio show so I'm really glad you're making the
 copies available on CD.  Also, in doing so, you've picked up another fan.  My husband isn't much of a web surfer
 but he took the copies of your show to listen to in the car on the way to work and now he's an enthusiastic devotee.

 So, keep up the good work and swing that hammer on Bush!
 I can't imagine what will happen to this country if that idiot gets another four years.

 Becky Ann

  Click  Here

 Delivered to your door -  like Sears did in the late 1800's.

 Order your CDs today!
 Got no speakers in your computer?
 That's OK - these play in your car - like magic!
 Impress your friends!

 Click  Here  to get 5 BartCop Radio CDs for just $24

 Currently shipping shows  27  (Double-wide)  28  (Five parts)  29  (Double-wide)
 mixed by professional knobbist Tommy Mack.  That's 5 CDRs for $24.  Cheeeeap.

 Remember, if you PayPal, mention your address.

  Click  Here  to send us your review of the most recent show.

 When the BCR CDs are sent out, we use the low-tech, environmentally preferable method
 of packing the CDs in BartCop Manor newspaper pages - it protects the CDs in transit.

 Oh sure, we could order some bubble-wrap from Halliburton, but I figure getting one more
 use out of the dead tree before is falls must be a noble cause and an all-round good thing to do.

 So this fella writes,
(This is all reconstructed from a week-old memory)

"Bart, the CDs were fun to hear, but I notice the paper that wrapped the CDs had articles circled,
  and these were the same rants you talked about on your radio shows and I thought that was kinda cool."
 

 So, ... if you order some BCR CDs, you might get some Smithsonian-worthy packaging at no additional cost.
 Haven't you always wanted your name in the Smithsonian?

 If so, you have nothing to lose by ordering your BCR CDs today!

 Impress your friends!
 That gorgeous minx who won't even look at you at school or at work?
 She's wet sauercraut in your hands once she knows you have BCR CDs.

 Chicks - they dig men who fight back.

 BartCop Radio Shows on CD for just   $24

 Subject: Monkey-slapping money

 I thought I was broke, but I was just surfing FreeRepublic.com and found out that -- thanks to
 George Dumbya Bush -- Clinton's deep recession, plunging stock market and soaring unemployment
 have finally been brought under control and the economy is booming again.

 Who knew?

 Anyway, with things going so good, I figure everybody ought to be able to send you fifty bucks once in a while.
 Here's mine.

 You sure earn it.

 You are to monkey-slapping what Kenyans are to marathons.

 ha ha

 Which is one more reason why I hope you... NEVER QUIT!!

 Ray
 

 Fort Smith Ray is so much a pillar, we need to invent a new word for people in his stratosphere.
 Thanks, Dude - I will not quit.

 Kerry says foreign leaders pulling for him

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Without naming anybody, Kerry said he had received words of encouragement from
 leaders abroad who were eager to see him defeat Bush on Nov. 2.

"I've met foreign leaders who can't go out and say this publicly, but boy they look at you and say,
'You've got to win this, you've got to beat this guy, we need a new policy,' things like that," he said.
 

 Are you kidding?
 Everyone outside of the US media influence wants the murdering monster to lose in November.

 Every nation is more afraid of Bush than bin Laden and al Qaeda.

 If Bush's good puppy press ran the stories and pictures the rest of the world sees,
 the "Impeach Bush" crowd would be in the 80 percent range.

 If you have something important send it to Sam at sam@bartcop.com

 We have a new address for advertisers - ads@bartcop.com

  It pays to advertise on  bartcop.com

 The net's best advertising bargain!

 Make your deal today  before May 1, when convention prices take effect.

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"In a conversation with Bush prior to former Senator Chuck Robb's appointment assured the president
 he would not support examining the administration's use of intelligence, said a Senate source familiar with the meeting.

"Robb bent over backward to say he did not support looking at the users," said the source.

 Bush has made it clear to Robb that he must keep his distance from Senate Democrats. Robb learned that he
 was to be appointed co-chairmen only a few hours before Bush made a public announcement.

 And Robb was warned that if he consulted with Tom Daschle (D-Appeaser) before the announcement,
 he would be stripped of his appointment, Senate sources said."
 

 Is Chuck Robb another Lee Hamilton?
 Bush only appointed loyal puppies to this commission, so by definition, that includes Robb.
 Bush has never been in a fight that wasn't pre-rigged up-front and the 9-11 commission and
 the Intel commission were pre-rigged before the appointments were announced.

 It's like a juror having to promise he'll vote not guilty before the trial starts,
 and the Democrats, once again, are ready and willing to assist Bush in another crime.

 Boy, I have been busier than a busy beaver today.

 We put the final touches on the sure-to-be-the-best-so-far radio show, I got this page
 finished in record time and I'm negotiating with some media peeps to get ads for  bartcop.com
 on the local cable network and maybe even a few on some national shows like Chris the
 Screaming Bush Butt-licker or maybe even Crossfire.

 They're supposed to get back with me on prices late today.

 Now I'm working on Show 31 and tomorrow's oage.

  Click  Here

  No Excerpt - you have to read it

 Editorial by Madison's Capital Times

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"President Bush took American political discourse to a new low last week when his re-election campaign
 began airing television commercials that exploit the horror and misery of the 9-11 attacks.

'The president's willingness to pick at the still open wounds of that tragedy in a crass appeal for political
 support illustrates the desperation of the man and his political team to cling to power.
'But this time Bush has gone too far."

..

 I was listening to The Guy James Show today and I'll be darned
 if Pat the Pillar didn't call in and thank Guy for running the BartCop Radio samples.
 If I'm lucky (and good) I could pick up some readers/subscribers in Ft Myers, Florida.

 You can hear the archived version at  whiterosesociety.org
 Third hour - if you want to hear Pat.

 BTW, is there a left-leaning talk show host (stop laughing) in your town
 that might play the occasional G-Rated audio snippet from BCR?

  Click  Here  and put Radio Snips  in the header

 Quotes

"Those ads they're running for President Bush - shouldn't they talk about 9/14 instead of 9/11?
  That's when he got to town, right?
  When I saw the first ad, I thought Rudy Giuliani was running for President. "
   --Mike Lupica, sports dude - I think, no attribution was sent.
 

 Let's all remember that Bill Clinton was in Australia on 9-11 and he beat Bush to New York.
 Let's also remember on 9-11, Bush went into hiding like a scared little girl and Giuliani stood tall
 and told America we'd get thru this while Bush was hiding, changing his pants every ten minutes.

 The gall of the GOP bastards to say Bush was a decisive, aggresive in-command leader that day,
 when the best he could muster was a short message on videotape, like it was shot in some Afghan cave.

 If the Democrats had any brains or courage, they'd make him EAT 9-11,
 but no, that wouldn't be polite and Mr Rove might not approve.

 Quotes

"This administration has given billions to Halliburton and requested $82 million to protect
  Iraq's 36 miles of coastline. But they call basic body armor for our troops a `nonpriority' item."
   --John Kerry,     Attribution
 

 So far, Kerry is saying a lot of the right things.

 Keep hammering that Monkey, John, and don't hesitate to call for advice or speech punch-ups.

 Housekeeping

 This might not make the cut, but there must be a dozen readers who see the difference
 between the members page and the page that's presented to the non-members.

 Funny, in the maybe-ten months we've had a members page, I can't recall a time when
 someone commented on the difference between the two.

 A regular rant might go 150 words.
 But the original rant was most likely 250 words and, ...upon reflection, certain paragraphs were
 later (meaning the next morning) deemed "not quite publishable," and this practice is almost year old.

 Funny, I've never read an mail that said, "Why did you change 'vicious murder' to 'depraved indifference"
 I've never been called on some not-quite-PC reference that wasn't re-worded by the time it hit the page.

 And if you think this is just another pitch to get the fence-sitters to subscribe - it is, but the
 members page is the first draft, and sometimes I publish a first draft and then reread it and think,
"Holy Koresh, you can't say that in public - most people can't handle the truth..."

 The constant editorial decisions over what-is-acceptable to the general public is a very interesting concept.

 I figure the subscribers can be a little more forgiving and take a little more of the truth.

 We put $3687 on the credit card for a new Mac G5 and monitor so Tommy can edit radio shows,
 (Hey - I finally bought a Mac! :)

 $3678 - cost of new computer.
 $3082 - raised.

 We're so close to home, I can hear Gary Busey moaning. That means Mrs Bart has her DVD of
 Mel Gibson on an endless loop kicking Busey's ass in Lethal Weapon.

 If you would care to help us with the Mac expenses, you could contribute via PayPal by Clicking  Here
 (Oddly, it helps if you send an abby-normal amount, like $51 instead of $50)

 If you prefer the mail, our address is  bartcop.com  PO Box 54466   Tulsa, OK  74155

  Show 29 is up.

Subscribe today!

 Extra thank yous to the subscribers and Mac donators.
 Your contributions allow us to continue beating up the Bush monkey and his Nazi gangsters.

 The subpoena list of rats

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 A federal grand jury has subpoenaed White House records on administration contacts
 with more than two dozen journalists and news media outlets in a special investigation
 into the improper leak of a covert CIA official's identity to Robert Novak last July.
 

 They include a who's who of rat bastards who've been getting leaks from their buddy Karl Rove.
 Novak, Andrea Mitchell, Chris the Screamer, Russert the Whore and more.

 You don't see the name 'Helen Thomas' on that list because she's nobody's whore.

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:

 How about an audio excerpt, instead?
 The Monkey made a few false claims so I made him eat 'em.
 BCR Show 30 is in the oven - cooking - but here's a lick off the spoon.!

 Click  Here  to listen to the Monkey chew

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Computer Tyme Hosting is owned by Marc Perkel, who first put Bartcop on the Internet back in 1996 and keeps Bartcop online today. Marc hosts several other political sites including American Politics Journal, Political Strikes, Faux News Channel, and interesting sites like the Church of Reality - a religion based on believing in everything that is real.  Our motto for this year is - "No Anti-Bush Site Left Behind". So - if you have an anti-bush site and you are choking on hosting fees or dealing with threats - let us know and we'll help keep you online.  We also have that strongest server side spam filtering on the planet. Check out Marx Mail for info on how you can have a Spam Free Email Account.

 Read the Previous Issue

 It had  everything.

 Copyright © 2004, bartcop.com

..
 

 Shrl, call  The BartPhone,  just to say "Hi!"
 Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!

 You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
 That would be really cool, and we'll catch you at The Joint on your next American tour.

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