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In
Today's Treehouse...
Quote of the Day "Another day in George Bush's America,
All
new!
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Quotes
"We are friends of America. But when America
treats its friends
in this way, then they are in big trouble."
--Ahmad Chalabi, who
was double-crossed by his crooked partners in the BFEE
Attribution
Yet more photos of US brutality published
..
"Masturbate for me ...or my dog will eat you!"
Excerpt:
The new pictures and videos go beyond the
photos previously released to the public in several ways,
amplifying the overt violence against detainees
and displaying a variety of abusive techniques previously unseen.
They show a group of apparently cavalier
soldiers assaulting prisoners, forcing detainees to masturbate, and
standing over a naked prisoner while holding
a shotgun. Some of the videos echo scenes in previously released
still photographs - such as the stacking
of naked detainees - but the video images render the incidents more vividly.
Each day it seems like it can't get any worse - and then it does.
You know Bush and the Pentagon are going to hang the grunts after
ordering them to "soften them up."
Quotes
"We didn't talk about polls. He believes in
what he's doing and he will
stay on course for his beliefs, no
matter what the political cost is."
--Rep. David Hobson, an Ohio Republican,
Attribution
Translation: Once Bush decides to invade a country, he
won't change his mind
no matter how many hundreds of young soldiers have to die.
Soldier
Found Guilty of Desertion in Iraq
Wait - the Commander in Thief deserted - why can't we put
him on trial?
Excerpt:
A military jury convicted a U.S. soldier
Friday of desertion for leaving his combat unit
in Iraq in protest of an "oil-driven" war.
Staff Sgt. Camilo Mejia of the Florida National
Guard was found guilty by a jury of four
officers and four enlisted soldiers.
Mejia, who has called the conflict an "oil-driven
war," testified Thursday that he disobeyed
orders to return to his unit because he
planned to seek status as a conscientious objector.
Mejia said he became upset after seeing
civilians hit by gunfire and watching an Iraqi
boy die after confusion over which military
doctor should treat him. .
Bush deserted his unit to get drunk and high on cocaine ...and
later was appointed president.
This guy didn't want watch more children die and they throw the
book at him?
Subject: Your web page
You are one, sick, bitter individual.
If you don't think we are in the fight
of our lives, you're not living on this planet.
These people don't care a whit for humanity.
Their stated goal is to eliminate us.
MClogger
Clogger Dude, who is "you," ...me?
Who are "they" and who are "us"?
Also, who are "we" and who are "their?"
Besides, it's a comedy site so blome.
Subject: Advertising on Air America Radio
I'm willing to go in for $95 to sponsor
someone.
I'm sure there are four (or five, not including
you) other Patriots out there who would do the same.
I'm in...who's with me?
Helldog
bartcop.com
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155
Note: We figure to do this around June 1.
For $190, you'll get three mentions on AAR, on a first-come, first served basis.
Click Here to hear the sample ad. The real thing will sound better.
So if you're thinking about getting involved in this - and have
at least $190,
the price of ads just dropped 33 percent thanks to Helldog and
others who chipped in.
Democratic Singles.Net is the new 100% FREE dating site for Democrats
Quotes
"The overall thing he accomplished was it's
clear to everybody in the room this guy is leading.
I've wanted this frankly for months,
for the president to come up and talk to the troops himself."
--Rep. John Boner,
an Ohio Republican, after meeting with Whistle Ass, Attribution
This buttmunch thinks he's one of the troops?
Report:
Soldiers Fondled Iraqi Prisoners
Will
this be the first war shut down over embarrassment?
Excerpt:
Some prisoners at Iraq's Abu Ghraib prison
were ridden like animals, fondled by female soldiers,
forced to curse their religion and required
to retrieve their food from toilets, according to the Whore Post.
The Post said detainees were forced to denounce
Islam, force-fed pork or liquor, required to
masturbate
in front of female soldiers, threatened
with rape, and made to walk on their hands and knees and
bark like dogs.
That is not respect.
Possible
Causes of Sudden Cardiac Death Found
I read the article and have no idea what it said
Israel
Withdraws From Parts of Gaza Camp
...that means a lasting peace over there is just days away
U.S.
Releases Group of Iraqi Prisoners
472 innocent people were held and tortured for how long?
N.Y.
lawyer fined for barking like a dog at a witness
Damn, I wish I could get some smartass lawyer to bark at
me like a dog
Nick Berg Beheaders Arrested
Excerpt:
An Iraqi security official says Iraqi police
have arrested four people in the killing of American Nicholas Berg.
The source says the suspects are former
members of Saddam Hussein's Fedayeen paramilitary group.
They were arrested a week ago
in a house north of Baghdad.
The Iraqi source said the group involved
in Berg's killing was
led by a nephew of Saddam.
Wow!
"Don't let Republicans create an America we won't recognize."
Thousands may have human form of mad cow
..
If
you find this on
your
plate - don't eat it.
Excerpt:
Some 3,800 people in Britain could be harbouring
the human form of mad cow disease
without knowing it, British government-funded
research suggests. Scientists who examined
12,674 stored appendix and tonsil samples
said they had identified three bearing signs of the
agent that causes mad cow. Applying
their findings to the entire population of the United Kingdom,
which is 60 million, they estimated that
about 3,800 people would test positive for the illness. .
When I suggested we "nip this in the bud," I got lettters saying
to knock it off, that there
were no big problems and that my comments might
actually hurt the beef industry.
If Clinton was president, we'd be a lot safer but Bush thinks
meat inspectors are a waste
of money and an unwarranted federal intervention into always-innocent
meat packers.
Get Your War On, (c) 2004 by David Rees. Used with permission
Quotes
"Some of us could get killed in tragic accidents."
--John McCain, perhaps recalling
the late Paul Wellstone? Attribution
An
Open Letter to My Pro-Bush Brother-in-Law
as seen on Buzzflash.com
Excerpt:
For two years I have struggled to write
this letter. Indeed, nary a morning has passed when I have not
sat at my desk and labored over the right
words to express my sorrow that anyone I know could support
the cruel, misguided and hopelessly immoral
wars being waged in our names.
I have repelled the urge to ask you whether
this war is worth donating the lives and limbs of your own sons.
If this combat is so important, would you
sacrifice Johnny's legs for Dick Cheney's war? Would you donate
Jacob's sanity? Would you support Brad
joining the National Guard and ending up in Iraq? If not, how are you
so willing to donate the bodies and minds
of other peoples' sons and daughters?
Thankfully, your boys are still too young
to serve in this abominable and disgraceful endeavor.
Give Bush four more years, however, and
they will be old enough. Is that what you want?
These brave soldiers died so the BFEE could steal billions of dollars.
George
Bush never looked into Nick's eyes
by Michael Berg
Excerpt:
"Even more than the murderers who
took my son's life, I condemn those who make policies to end lives.
George Bush's ineffective leadership is
a weapon of mass destruction, and it has allowed a chain reaction
of events that led to the unlawful detention
of my son which immersed him in a world of escalated violence.
Were it not for Nick's detention, I would
have had him in my arms again. That detention held him in Iraq
not only until the atrocities that led
to the siege of Fallujah, but also the revelation of the atrocities committed
in the jails in Iraq, in retaliation for
which my son's wonderful life was put to an end."
There is a website selling this print called, "Praying for Peace."
Just a guess, but I think Washington and Lincoln would praobably kick
the crap out of the greedy little coward for getting so many soldiers
killed.
Praying for peace my ass!
Bush wanted this war more than anything.
Marty's Entertainment Page
Subject: BCR Show 38
Thank YOU for the great radio shows.
As I mentioned previously, I was one of
the "doubters", but the radio shows are first class,
and have turned out to be far beyond my
expectations for quality, variety, humor, information, etc.
Your sweet, kind-of-country-down-home voice
really does it for me.
Thanks again for all you do.
Penny M.
Desert Hot Springs, CA
Subject: BCR Show 38
Hey Bart!
1) I loved the Show 38 "comedy" and I also
enjoy the entertainment commentaries...
It's fun when you cover a lot of topics
because you always put a really funny spin
on everything you touch or beat down!
2) Idea: structure the show to use some
fun/comedy at the beginning and then close the show with it,
so each starts and ends on a high note!
3) A few shows ago you had a back&forth
with Tommy Mack. Those are a blast!
And when you had Tally speaking out - that
was good too.
Guests like that seem like a good way to
pad content with less work for you.
I love it when your shows are posted on a Friday so I can end the workweek with a blast!
IDEA: Consider doing interviews with people.
Another way to fill up space without adding
any more work than setting it up. Get
people to agree to the interviews by allowing them to
plug something - their website or product,
etc.
Looking forward to #39!!!!!!!!
Matt
Thanks for the feedback - that helps.
We have been trying to do some interviews
but nobody will agree to speak with us.
I think we're too radioactive for well
known people with reputations to protect.
Quotes
"You criticized me for attacking the president
for not telling the truth.
Well, where are the weapons of mass
destruction? Where are the nuclear weapons?
Where's the uranium we were going to
get from Niger?"
--Howard Dean, on Hannity
& the Toothless Colmes Attribution
Whining from the vulgar Pigboy
"How come ABC can air these photos of our prison
guards
poking around at dead Iraqi corpse,
but we can't -- Oh, no, we can't air!"
Pigboy - what are you trying unsuccessfully to say?
What does "We can't air" mean?
"It's too shocking! It's just too horrible!
-- not only can we not air,
not only can we not see, not only can
we not broadcast the execution
of Nick Berg, we can't even talk about
it?"
Rush, you're lying again.
Who told you you can't talk about Berg's execution?
Aren't you the boss at your Nazi radio network?
Did the government tell you you weren't allowed to talk about
Berg?
No, you're just making shit up for those gullible idiots who
don't realize you're a lying Nazi whore.
Sean hannity (I've been told) aired the audio from Berg's execution
- was he arrested, Rush?
No, because that's legal under a thing you once enjoyed called
the First Amendment.
Why are you lying and telling your sheep you're not allowed to
even talk about this subject?
"It's not even in the news anymore. It's not
even second tier. It's not even third tier,
but what remains at the top of the
stack? Abu Ghraib."
--Rush Limbaugh, Attribution
I feel so sorry for the right-wing apologists for the out-of-control federal government.
They're trying to get their message is out and besides Bill O'Reilly
and
Sean Hannity and
Eva Von Zahn and
The Beltway Boys and
Brit Hume and
Tony Snow and
Juan Williams and
Mara Liason and
John McLaughlin and
Chris the Screamer and
G. Gordon Liddy and
Laura the Whore and
Paul Harvey and
Michael Medved and
George (Judas Maximus) Steffi and
George (dumb as a chimp) Will and
Bob Scheiffer and
Tim the Whore and
Ollie North and
John Hockenberry and
Robert Novak and
Tucker Carlson and
Paul Weyrich and
Brent Bozell and
MSGOP's Brian Williams and
Wolf the Whore and
Bill Schneider and
Candy Crowley and
John Stossel and
Howie Kurtz and
Ann Coulter and
Laura Ingraham and
Kelly Anne the Whore and
Dlenn Beck and
Randy Humphries and
Peggy Noonan and
Andrew Sullivan and
William Safire and
the networks and
the major papers and
the weekly magazines - they have nobody.
New promotional
idea!
Until further notice, with each $24, 6-CD order,
we'll include a pre-Tommy Mack show that was recorded
when I had less than fifteen hours behind a microphone,
back when I was going my own editing and mixing.
It's terrible!
You won't believe how bad it was!
So you put that on first, then try to last as long as you can.
Then, when you put in the newest TM-produced shows,
they sound fantastic, ...but
the host still blows.
Order your CDs today!
These play in your car or laptop - like magic!
Click Here to get BartCop Radio CDs for just $24
Currently shipping shows
37
(Double - Cinco de Mayo)
38
(Double - More Humor)
39
(Double - and best yet0
plus an extra-lame show from the past
That's 7 CDs for $24 Cheeeeap.
Remember, if you PayPal, mention your address.
Click Here to send your review of Show 38
Subject: A question about the Jews
I see that the left wing in America is now
blaming the Jews for the fact that a Gentile president
and a Gentile Congress went to war against
Iraq. Other than contributing to and voting for Democrats
more than any group except blacks, what
else have we Jews done to make the left hate us so much?
Would Democrats feel less soiled if we leave
their party and join the GOP, because I'm guessing that
will happen if the left-wing Jew-bashing
continues. Even masochistic Hebrews have their limits.
Thanks for your excellent site.
Shalom
Dude, I have no idea.
I'll take your word that the left-wingers are the problem, but
I wouldn't know.
It's been my experience that insanity towards the Israel/Arab
situation is ubiquitous.
VCR Alert
Tonight
God stops talking to Joan and appears to her mother on the last
Joan
of Arcadia.
They've been picked up for another season, too.
If you like swan-necked beauties, Catherine Bell stars in tonight's
season finale of JAG.
Dave has Ellen Degeneres
Saturday
If you're really old, CBS is re-running the Dick Van Dyke
Reunion and some Carol Burnett retrospective
NBC has Jurassic Park, the original, the good one.
Sunday
Simpsons finale, and that reminds me - there's
a Simpsons where Homer gets medicinal marijuana - anybody
have that?
I'd sure like to see that episode. I think all Simpsons
shows are great, no easy thing after 14 years - anybody have that?
On the Alias finale, everyone is hoping Sydney gets a
chance to go mano-a-mano with the bitch who stole her man.
In the previews, it shows blondie tied up and ready to be executed,
but Sydney will want to kill her with her bare hands.
After Alias is Super Millionaire
- will anybody ever get close to winning a million, much less ten
million?
The Cold Case finale should be good. It gets my
vote for best new show about solving cold cases.
...and then there's The Sopranos. I think they have
a rule that they can't do two great shows in a row.
Last week's extended nonsense dream squence had them howling
on the Sopranos newsgroup.
What that show needs is more mob hits and less of Carmela's midlife
sexual crisis.
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Why advertise on bartcop.com?
...because hits are up!!
That was expected, because people are paying
attention!!
It pays to advertise on bartcop.com
Formerly Howard Dean's campaign manager, Joe Trippi
will be the guest of honor
at a ReDefeat Bush fundraising event at the Hemphill
Art Gallery, 1027 33rd Street, NW
in Georgetown from 6:30 to 8:30 on Thursday May
27. If the event does not sell out
ahead of time tickets will be available at the
door. Parking is available at nearby lots and garages.
Admission is $50 and in addition to food and Trippi
you get to view The Hole Shebang,
an exhibit featuring the infamous artifacts of
the crimes against democracy committed
in Florida in November 2000. You may secure a
place at this event by purchasing your
tickets at http://www.redefeatbush.com/trippi
or by calling 202-966-0040.
Quotes
"Four years ago I supported Ralph Nader because
he stood for the issues I believe in.
A clean environment, civil rights, and
a sensible foreign policy. But now, after seeing how
quickly and thoroughly the Bush administration
has wounded our country - there's more pollution,
an economy that sends our jobs overseas,
and a war I have serious questions about -- I feel I made
a mistake. By supporting Ralph Nader,
I actually helped George Bush."
Bob Schick, who believes his
vote for Nader actually help Bush Attribution
Subject: Iraqi prison pictures
Weren't these prisoners all murderers, caught
terrorists that have
killed our soldiers and rapists of our
female soldiers?
Bob Blooger
The Red Cross says between 70 and 90 percent of them are innocent,
but to Bush, all Iraqis are terrorists, suiciders. maimers
and stovepipers.
Banana Fact: Bananas are not grown commercially in the continental United States
Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq
795
797 dead American soldiers.
Lately we've been averaging four deaths per day.
795 families
saw that military car pull into their driveway.
That's
gotta be a bad feeling.
Subject: Why I subscribed
...Oklahoma liberals like us are endangered,
but have more punch than those from the coasts.
...I'm a teacher in Texas and have the
money. If I taught in Oklahoma, I wouldn't have it.
...I drive a car that gets 38 MPG...I save
the money.
...I have a six-year-old son who chants
"cheater!" when Smirk is on the TV.
ha ha
...I teach and coach in the notorious Oak
Cliff section of Dallas. I know what a load of crap
No Child Left Behind
is and the effects of conservative white paranoia on black and brown kids.
...My students already say "They'll just
throw away our votes in Texas."
...I've read for years as a poor student.
Time to give some of that charity extended to me back.
...The Invisible Cloud Being is really
on your side.
...I used your site last week to win a
bet with a Repub teacher who wanted proof that Clinton created more jobs
than Bush. You get that $10.
John, tell your friend creating 22 million is better than losing 2 million.
...I tell my players that in any group effort,
every bit helps score the goal. I need to practice what I preach.
...With Frosty Troy getting long in the
tooth, we need someone to come out of the bullpen to counteract the Daily
Oklahoman.
...You were right about Chinaco Anejo.
...and Poker.
...but not soccer!
Cheers,
John in Oak Cliff
Do you have an opinion?
Do any GOP impressions?
Call the
Then listen for your call on...
918-748-1714
You have two minutes to record your message.
Quotes
"In a series of public statements over the
last few months, Cheney has given us
a glimpse of how the world looks from
his perspective. In Cheney World, Fox News
is a bastion of journalistic integrity,
Wal-Mart's poverty-level wages represent all that
is good about the American economy,
Rumsfeld's mishandling of/lying about Iraq makes
him the best Defense Secretary ever,
and Halliburton is a shining beacon of integrity
even as it shafts American taxpayers
and U.S. troops."
--David Sirota, friend
of Al Frankens, Attribution
..
Subject:
You are f-ing morons!
Rex
Murphy
Webmaster at http://rexmurphy.com/
I are?
At least I'm smart enough to have web page.
If you had a webpage or
the balls to meet me in a live chat room
I'd handle you like you were my hooded,
naked prisoner in an Iraqi prison.
Great news!!
I went to the orthopedic surgeon yesterday carrying the MRI photos of my knee.
Like my GP, he put me on my back and started waving my bad leg
around in the air.
I told him what he was doing didn't particularly cause a lot
of pain but that he sure
as hell was scaring the bejezzes out of me by doing that.
Then he looked at the photos real close and walked over to me
with that somber look
that all doctors give me these days and said,
"I'm afraid surgery won't help you.
Your knee is so torn up, surgery wouldn't
do you any good," and he's all apologizing
about the situation. I told him that was the best damn
medical news I've heard all year.
Woo Hoo! No surgery for Ol' Bart! Woo Hoo!
Sidebar:
I don't like surgery. If
things go bad, I'd have to do the radio show from Heaven and I'll bet
the accoustics are crappy there,
what with the sound bouncing off all the clouds and stuff.
Apparently the last doctor who butchered my knee circa
1988 tore out a lot of cartilage
and he really put a Number Six beatdown on my meniscus.
I was so happy, I made him repeat it - no surgery, right?
When he answered in the affirmative, I tried to kiss him but he
pulled away.
When I asked if I had any alternatives, he said I needed artificial
knees implanted,
but I currently have enough cartilage left that I wasn't quite
bone-on-bone, so he told me
to come back in ten years and we'll do that.
I didn't tell him I don't have ten years :)
But there is one thing, and it's the title of today's page - Turkey wattle.
What is turkey wattle?
..
It's that red stuff under a turkey's chin - that's turkey
wattle.
Apparently that's a big cure-all in bass-ackwards Oklahoma - they
use it for everything.
They're going to inject my sore knee with f-ing turkey
wattle!!!
Let's hope it works better than the time I got the shot in my
elbow.
That shit passed me out right on the floor of the damn doctor's
office.
And get this - it's so expensive, they have to pre-approve
it with Mrs. Bart's insurance carrier.
Now I ask you - how the "F" can turkey waddle be expensive?
Turkey farms gotta have wattle laying all over the place
after Thanksgiving, right?
Hey, you younger kids - have a good time now, because getting old blows donkey.
So, I'm in a good great mood.
I think I'll do a shot of Chinaco for turkey wattle...
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