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  In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
The Brains Thing
The Blonde (?) Assassin
Want a free trip to Iraq?
D-r-i-v-e   b-y   N-e-w-
NaziCon2004 Schedule
Olympics a Big Bust?
Canada may Fuel Pot Boom 
They Failed Us on Sept. 11
Bush Flunks Autism Quiz 

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Quote of the Day

"I just want the questions to be asked. 
  It doesn't matter whether I ask them. 
  No leader should get off the hook when 
  they take people to war." 
    --Helen Thomas, asked if she misses asking the 
      first question at news conferences,  Attribution
 
 
 

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Volume 1380 - Win a free trip to Iraq 


  Tuesday    August 17, 2004 

 Quotes

"The ball has landed in the centre of the White House. Let's hope that this victory
  permits the government of the US to respect the government and people of Venezuela."
    --President Hugo Chávez, saying his recall victory ion Venezuela would be like a baseball
      being hit all the way to Washington,    Attribution
 

 Hugo, don't hold your breath waiting for America's illegal thugs to respect Democracy.
 America has lost our Constitution, remember?


 The Brains Thing
  Intelligence matters more than character

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"Three-plus years later we know better, or at least we should. Intelligence matters. The job of the president
 is not to love his wife; it's to manage a wide range of complicated issues. That requires character, yes, but not
 the kind of character measured by private virtues like fidelity to spouse and frequency of quotations from Scripture.
 Yet it also requires intelligence. It requires intellectual curiosity, an ability to familiarize oneself with a broad range
 of views, the capacity -- yes -- to grasp nuances, to foresee the potential ramifications of one's decisions, and, simply,
 to think things through. Four years ago, these were not considered necessary pieces of presidential equipment.
 Today, they have to be."
 

 We remember the summer of 2000, when Rush led the entire media into saying,
"There's no need for the president to be the smartest man in the room."

 Tell that to the 944 families who lost loved ones in Iraq.
 Everybody knew Gore was 20 times smarter than the Monkey Governor,
 but Gore sighed at the debates and that was rude ...so ...let's go with the Monkey!

 Almost half of America did that.
 

  Comments?



 Quotes

"We are past the stages of terrorism. What you see now is the elimination of the
  last pockets and the chasing of the last remainders. We directly went to the heads
  of the snakes to cut them off, and we know the tails are a group of our sons who went astray.
  We know how to deal with them and how to bring them back to the right path."
    --Saudi Crown Prince Abdullah, (Bush's Unka) who must be getting his intel from our CIA,   Attribution


 Ann Slanders: The blonde assassin

  Click  Here

  Exerpt:
"Reactions to her name (which is almost universally recognised in the States) are, unsurprisingly,
 sharply partisan, and she is cordially detested by the liberals she targets. Al Franken devoted two
 chapters of his book Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them to her - "Ann Coulter: Nutcase"
 and "You Know Who I Don't Like? Ann Coulter".

 Not that she would care. Her next book, due out in October, is called How to Talk to a Liberal (If You Must).
 And even this relatively emollient title is a concession. 'They pushed this title on me," Coulter says
 when we meet. "All my titles were much more vicious. What I didn't like about How to Talk to a Liberal
 is that I really think the best way to talk to one is to hit them in the head with a baseball bat.
 So I threw in the parenthetical If You Must.'"
 

 You can tell Slanders is a Nazi because she'd use violence to get people to agree with her.

  Comments?



 Dueling Quotes

"The Oval Office is a powerful place. It's the kind of place where my mother
  walks in and feels so overwhelmed, she won't tell me what to do."
    --Dubya, August 10th, Niceville, Florida,  Attribution
 
 

"The Oval Office is a powerful place. It's -- you know, people walk in and just get
  overwhelmed by the majesty of this shrine to democracy. The only person I know
  that didn't was my mother, who walked in and continued to tell me what to do."
    --Dubya, two days later in Las Vegas, calling himself a liar    Attribution
 

 "Shrine to democracy," my ass.
  Is that the room where you and Ashcroft burned the Bill of Rights?
 

 .
"It's hard remembering what the truth is all the time..."


 Daniel Pearl family asks Cheney to knock it off

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"The family of Daniel Pearl, a US journalist who was beheaded in Pakistan two years ago,
 urged US politicians not to use the reporter's name for political reasons after Dick Cheney
 invoked Pearl's name during a campaign event.

"The family of Daniel Pearl respectfully requests that his legacy remains non-partisan,"
 The Wall Street Journal reporter's relatives said in a statement responding to Cheney's comments.
"We would like him to be remembered for what he was in his life, a passionate American and
 humanist who rose above political, religious and cultural divisions," the family said."



 Subject:  Kerry's war support

 Hi Bart,

 You're absolutely right about Kerry trying to lose the election.

 Bush gave him a clear opportunity to stand  up and say, "Hell no I wouldn't have
 supported the war  given what I know now; what sane person would?"

 That alone would have earned my vote, despite his generally pro-corporation
 economics, unwillingness to really address the deficit, unwillingness to take on Bush
 on his total destruction of the planet, health-care plan that mostly subsidizes the
 insurance industry instead of reforming it, etc.  But now he's totally blown it.

 <snip>

 Rob
 

 Rob, yes, there are a hundred better answers Kerry could've given besides "Yes."
 If nothing else, he could've remembered what he told Rolling Stone and said
"Had I known you were going to fuck up everything, I would've voted no."


If you were haunted by "Fahrenheit 9/11",
BUSH'S BRAIN
will give you nightmares.

Meet Karl Rove,
the most powerful political figure America has never heard of.

Until now...
BUSH'S BRAIN.


 Dueling Quotes

"Today, because the world acted with courage and moral clarity...
  Iraqi athletes are competing in the Olympic Games."
       --Dubya, 8/14/04     Attribution

"Iraq sent a four-athlete team...to the 2000 Olympics in Sydney."
      --U.S. State Department,  Attribution
 
 

 Four Iraqi athletes in Athens- a thousand dead American soldiers?
 Did Bush strike a good deal for America?


 Universal National Service Act of 2003
   Have you always wanted a free trip to Iraq?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 The language of this bill mandates a national service obligation for every U.S. citizen and
 permanent resident, aged 18-26. It authorizes the President to establish both the number of
 people to be selected for military service, and the means of selection. Additionally, the measure
 requires those not selected specifically for military service to perform their national service
 obligation in a civilian capacity for at least two years.
 
 

.
"You can't think life isn't a free ride..."

  Comments?



 Subject: Loving the Amsterdam reports

 Bart,

 You must recruit a European correspondent.
 I would enoy that immensely, and I bet others would too.

 Perhaps someone would contribute a weekly "what do foreigners think of our shit" type article,
 sprinkled with cultural anecdotes, and some stuff about their domestic politics etc.

 Food for thought.
 JAG
 

 JAG, I like that idea.
 To steal from Mike Malloy, we need a "Bureau Chief" in every country.

 Anybody care to tell us what effect Bush is having on your country?
 Plus, trip reports are fun, too.


Used with permission :)


 Bobby Fischer Plans to Marry Japanese Woman
  On the run from george W Bush for "illegally" playing Chess

  Click  Here
 

 Jurors Hear More Peterson-Mistress Calls
  Is he on trial for murdering his wife or lying to his goomah?

  Click  Here
 

 GM to Begin Making Cadillacs in China
  Will they call them Cadirracs?

  Click  Here
 

 FBI Tracks Potential GOP Protesters
  If Karl Rove eyes your web site, you might get a visit

  Click  Here



 Saving the Vote
   by Paul Krugman

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"Everyone knows it, but not many politicians or mainstream journalists are willing
 to talk about it, for fear of sounding conspiracy-minded: there is a substantial chance
 that the result of the 2004 presidential election will be suspect.

 When I say that the result will be suspect, I don't mean that the election will, in fact,
 have been stolen. (We may never know.) I mean that there will be sufficient uncertainty
 about the honesty of the vote count that much of the world and many Americans will have serious doubts.

 How might the election result be suspect?
 Well, to take only one of several possibilities, suppose that Florida - where recent polls
 give John Kerry the lead - once again swings the election to George Bush."
 

 We covered this in BCR 50.
 What happens when all the polls show Kerry clearly winning Florida,
 but Diebold and Jeb claim the never-elected Governor actually won?

 Will we let them steal it again, like last time?
 Sure we will - we're Democrats - we don't want it bad enough to fight for it.

 But if Kerry wins Florida, and Bush hints there might've been a voting problem,
 hundreds of thousands of armed Republicans could take to the streets to protest
 the "illegal" Kerrry administration and then what do we do?

 Can you say, "Tanks in the streets?
 Or are all our tanks in Iraq?
 Will the unarmed, polite, gentle left let them steal another presidency?
 

.
"God told Pat Robertson I won 2004 in a blow job - I mean blow out..."

 Comments?


 Letter from Iraq

 I'm actually not doing so well right now.

 I have been working with one of the Army Special Forces teams for the past few weeks
 and have made some pretty good friends with a few of them.  Last evening they went on
 a raid, accompanied by some Iraqi National Guard guys, and none of them made it back.

 It's weird, I just shook Mike's (team commander) hand right before they left last evening
 for the mission, told him to be safe, and I hear he took one in the face.  I fucking hate this place.

 The Iraqis we've have been training are the biggest cowards I have ever seen.  They are in it
 for the money and nothing else.  They don't care if they have a free and safe country to live in.

 They join the Iraqi police force or the National Guard, and they run if the shit starts to hit the fan.
 I have no respect for any of these people over here.  Anyway, I'm sorry about venting to you Susan,
 I am just a little upset about the incident last evening.

 Jason
 
 

 It that letter had made some wild claim, I wouldn't have printed it.
 But I wonder how many tens of thousands of our soldiers have had days like Jason had?

  Comments?



 Subject: Your choice of cartoons

 A couple of observations:  Weakly World News is funny.
 Did you hear Jab/Jeb actually saying that God sent the hurricane on the course it took,
 regardless of our best scientific machine's predictions?  He did .  I heard it twice.
 (I worked evacuation Cutler Ridge, hurricane Andrew, awful day).

 Bush One, Boob the First, flew in and flew out of Homestead AFB and it took almost a week for any help to arrive.
 First and only time I saw actual looting, low grade, a dairy drive-in.  Stuff would have gone bad anyway.

 Steve Bradenton's cartoon, love children, very funny.
 Republican Press's stuff makes me laugh, too.

 Finally, here in the crotch of the bible belt, S.C., the big-ass Caddys, Buicks, Imperials, (do they still make those?)
 are beginning to discretely display really small tasteful political stickers.  One is simply "W" and the other "Dubya".
 They're not in too much of a hurry to show what ass's they are,  I guess.

 Picked up on a couple of issues I missed.
 The convention may have been routine, but you still are bright.
 Wish you were paid what you're worth!
 LizW
 

 Liz, please don't wish that on me.
 I'd like to make enough to pay the bills :)



 Quotes

"In the name of Jesus, I can't stand it any more. How many MORE people will our government
  blow up and maim and kill? Thousands dead? Tens of thousands dead? Hundreds of thousands dead?
  Millions dead? When will my country's armies stop the killing in Iraq? When will they finally say,
"We have won the war on Iraq." When every man, woman and child in that country is dead?"
  Where is the moral justification for thousands and thousands and thousands of deaths?
  Ask Hitler. Ask Stalin. Ask George W. Bush. There is none."
    --Jane Stillwater,  PLEASE revoke GWB's license to kill     Attribution


 NaziCon2004 Schedule New York, NY

  Click  Here  then scroll down one click (you can do it!)

  Excerpt:
 8:10 PM Call for EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh and Dick Cheney
 8:15 PM John Ashcroft Lecture: The Homos Are After Your Children
 8:30 PM Round table discussion on reproductive rights (men only)
 

 Comments?



 Olympics a Big Bust?

 Not sure why, but the Olympics doesn't interest me at all this year.
 It's mostly NBC's fault - whenever I check the unreadable TV Guide,
 all I see is archery, women's basketball, volleyball, men's losing basketball.

 They say some events are only attended by a few hundred people.
 I accidentally (trust me) saw some tennis last night, and it seemed like
 only one seat in ten had a butt in it.

 Is it Athen's fault for not appearing to be ready?
 Is terrorism the big factor?
 Is it the Americans-on-dope factor?

 Maybe people turned off when they see Bob (motormouth) Costas.
 We taped the opening ceremony, but I knew Costas would ruin every
 surprise so I figured we'd watch the tape later - but who has the time?

 Plus, the hype that that Phelps guy would win 60 medals was overblown.
 Poor guy, has he won more than one gold?

 Maybe if NBC loses hundred of millions of dollars they'll learn not to do this,
 but, like FOX and baseball, they seem to not mind losing megatons of dollars
 as long as they have the "prestige" of broadcasting this "big event."


 Have I mentioned lately what a whore Wolf Blizter is?

 As I type this, (11:15 CST) Wolf is screaming, "Sex, lies and audiotape" as he breathlessly
 describes Scott Peterson's grade-schoolish, puppy-love talk with the stripper, Amber Frey.

 Hey Wolf, that might've been half-cute 15 years ago when the movie came out.
 Who's writing your copy, Dennis Miller?

 At the risk of sounding pro-murder (that saved you, the reader, the time to wrote) is there a chance Amber Frey
 will come out of this looking like Linda Tripp?  To me, she's coming off like some Nancy Drew-wannabe,
 making over 300 phone calls to Scott Peterson trying to get him to admit he killed his wife

 If Amber's phone calls, playing Lil' Detective, are the state's best chance at nailing him, - is that good?

 If Peterson didn't realize those 300 phone calls, grilling him about "Did you sleep with your wife
 the might before she went missing?" was a trap, he should at least go to jail for felony stupidity.

 Do you think Peterson, Kobe, Michael Jackson et al will be done with in our lifetimes?



 Subject:  I know what Kerry's problem is!

  Click  Here


 Canada may fuel boom in pot exports to US

..

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 The U.S. seized more than 48,000 lbs. of marijuana along the Canadian border last year,
 nearly double the 26,000 lbs. it retrieved in 2002, according to a U.S. State Department report.
 There have been seizures all along the border, in Montana, North Dakota, Michigan, Ohio and
 other states. Canadian pot has cachet in the U.S. because of its reputation for being especially
 potent. The featured brand is BC Bud - which is grown in British Columbia and has become
 synonymous with the high-grade marijuana grown throughout Canada. Once in the U.S., the pot
 is exchanged for cash, and sometimes cocaine or guns, which are then smuggled back to Canada.
 

 Let's see...
 48,000 pounds of pot, at $3,000 a pound is $144 million dollars worth - wholsale.
 Retail (just quessing) that number goes to $6000 per pound minimum.

 Then figure they probably catch ten percent or less of the shipments, that makes $288 million.

 Now, tax $288 million dollars at, say, ten percent, and some government just made $28 million dollars.

 Just think if they made table salt illegal.
 People would start smuggling table salt, and it might sell for $100 an ounce.
 Some people who traffic in salt would be caught and sent to prison for a long time, thereby
 ruining their marriages and families and costing the taxpayers millions to house and feed them.

 So, we can ruin lives and spend billions providing cages for them,

 OR...

 We could stop lying to ourselves about a boogyman that doesn't exist.



 Subject: Man, you are catchin' hell

 BC,

 Tell them to build their own damn treehouse.
 You need a Humboldt vacation brother.

 Eric X
 

 Eric, I don't mind the heat, but it's odd to get mail from longtime readers saying,
"Why did you turn Republican? Why are you trying so hard to get Bush elected?"

 I think there's frustration out there because people see 2000 playing out all over again.
 Kerry can still win this - but he's got to stop handing the Nazis ammo every day.


 Florida: Is the hurricane body count accurate?
   rumormillnews.com  has eye witnesses reports

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 ".in Punta Gorda ...we were stopped by FEMA, National Guard, and STATE POLICE who asked me to prove
 I had a reason to be there. I told them the exact name and address of my relative down the street, showed them
 our gas cans, showed them my military (retired) ID, and they eventually let me through after checking the name
 and address I had given them. There were MANY MANY body bags lined up on both sides of the road, far more
 than we could count as I drove slowly through that one block. There were search dogs and many teams going
 through the rubble not far from the main road. They hadn't even passed through 50 feet of rubble yet. But even
 worse was what I was unable to see on Friday night... body PARTS that were being collected. Our estimate is
 that there were at least 20-30 body bags already on BOTH sides, waiting to be put into trucks.


Outfoxed,
Fahrenheit 9-11,
Hunting of the President
Order your copies from the BartCop Bookstone


 Patriot wonders what son died for in Iraq
  Lance Cpl. Jonathan Collins should not be dead.  he was 19.

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
"There are people at the door," Lauren told her mother. "Two Marines."
 Jack and Angel knew what that meant.

 But as much as Jack and Angel stood by their son and every other American
 soldier in Iraq, they have never believed in this war.

"We believe we can separate the politics from what's going on there, from what our
 soldiers are being asked to do," Jack said. "I agreed with why we went to Afghanistan.
 I think we needed to. But we misread what was going to happen in Iraq.".
 

  Comments?


http://www.blakesforcongress.com/

US House candidate from Louisiana


 Subject: Scott Peterson is innocent?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Are you privvy to something no one else knows? I know you are trying to defend the
 Constitution, but this is not the issue to do it with. Your continued defense of Scott is
 puzzling to me, and makes me uneasy.  I respect your opinion and would have no
 objection to you just saying that a man is innocent until proven guilty, but your continued
 championing of him and your devoting so much space to this troubles me.


Click to Order


Marty's Entertainment Page


 Quotes

"If Bush loses this election, you are going to find an implosion in the Republican Party.
  The Christian conservatives will be blamed, unfairly I think, by people who don't want them in the party."
    --Robert Novak, who just got a second virgin pregnant  Attribution


 Subject: Thanks and acknowledgment

 Bart,

 I appreciate your humor, good work, penchant for the truth, and, "spine."
 Thank you for helping to keep me going during the years and months
 leading to removing the never-elected abomination we have suffered.

 I'm not much a drinker.  Notwithstanding, I will have a shot of that drink
 you refer to sometimes, on November 3rd, in victory and in salute to you
 and all of us who worked towards this most important goal.

 Thanks again.
 Andrew B.
 

 Andrew, thanks, and remember to get Chinaco Anejo



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 Quotes

"For all the talk about polarization, I find a startling agreement from everybody I talk to.
  Nobody seems to like George Bush very much. The Democrats I talk to hate him and
  the Republicans aren't very enthusiastic about him."
    --Robert Novak, "Does a GOP Implosion Await?"         Attribution
 

 Bob Novak telling the truth?
 Somewhere, a virgin just got pregnant.


 Rumsfeld and Bush Failed Us on Sept. 11

  Click  Here

  Excerpt;
"Two planes hitting the twin towers did not rise to the level of Rumsfeld's leaving his office
 and going to the War Room? How can that be?" asked Mindy Kleinberg, one of the widows
 known as the Jersey Girls, whose efforts helped create and guide the 9/11 commission.
 The fact that the final report failed to offer an explanation is one of the infuriating holes
 in an otherwise praiseworthy accounting.

 Rumsfeld was missing in action that morning, "out of the loop" by his own admission. The lead
 military officer that day, Brig. Gen. Montague Winfield, told the commission that the Pentagon's
 command center had been essentially leaderless: "For 30 minutes we couldn't find" Rumsfeld.

"Rumsfeld is in charge of NORAD, which has the specific mission of protecting the United States
 and Canada by responding to any form of air attack. The official chain of command in the event of
 a hijacking calls for the president to empower the secretary of Defense to send up a military escort
 and, if necessary, give shoot-down orders."
 

 It seems like they were all asleep that day.
 Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, the interceptor jets.

 We couldn't get one of them to come to work?


Bush's American soldier body count in Iraq

 920, 925, 932, 934, 944  dead American soldiers.
 

...and Kerry can't take a clear lead in this race?
 

"I know what I'm doing when it comes to winning this war."
 --The Butcher of Baghdad,      Attribution
 

http://icasualties.org/oif/


 Subject: Kill Bill soundtrack help

 I dunno if this gives you any more info, but RZA is a producer for the rap group wu-tang clan.
 The fact that the producers were listed as the RZA and the chinganos would mean that the song
 in the move was a song produced by RZA using samples of a chinganos song.

 In simple english, the song used in the movie was produced by the RZA, using elements from the
 original song by the chingons. RZA used portions (that you recoginized) in his song that was included
 in the movie, just like you might use some audio samples of Bush or Rush the pigboy in your radio show.
 Hope that makes sense Bartdude.

 best,
 mookie

  Comments?


 Angry doll marketer threatens to market Schwarzenegger urinal cakes

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 An angry businessman who was sued by Schwarzenegger for marketing
 bobblehead dolls in his likeness said he would now market "Arnie" urinal cakes..

 Also included in the Arnie product line-up, according to Edgell, will be a Arnie "Girlie-Man"
 doll, featuring Schwarzenegger wearing "a pink dress, lipstick and eye makeup."


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 Today in History

 • In 1807, Fulton's Steam Boat began heading up the Hudson River on its successful round-trip to Albany.

 • In 1863, Federal batteries and ships bombarded Fort Sumter in Charleston harbor during the Civil War.

 • In 1896, a prospecting party discovered gold in Alaska, sparking Klondike gold rush.

 • In 1943, the Allied conquest of Sicily was completed as U.S. and British forces entered Messina.

 • In 1969, Hurricane Camille slammed into the Gulf Coast.

 • In 1969, Woodstock concluded in N.Y. and Carlos Santana began coming down from his trip.

 • In 1978, the first successful trans-Atlantic balloon flight landed ouside Paris.

 • In 1987, Rudolf Hess, grandfather of Karl Rove, died of suicide near Spandau Prison at age 93.

 • In 2003, federal investigators searched for clues into Bush's massive power blackout.
 

  Comments?


..

 Subject: thanks

 Dear Asscop,

 Thanks for posting my name and email on your site.
 I enjoyed all the hate mail you faggot readers sent.

 Daren Phillips


 Amsterdam Trip Report Part II

  Click  Here



 Autism questions - 7 pages from Kerry, 0 from Bush

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 I am the father of a 2 year old son recently diagnosed with autism.
 Our family has become very active in online communities related to autism
 as we try to learn as much as possible, and to network with fellow parents
 facing some of the same issues that we do.

 We got a message this morning from one of those groups that was on the
 one hand utterly unsurprising, but at the same time deeply revolting.


 Subject: Show 50 descriptions at the bottom of the page

 Hi Bart,

 I think on today's page the old descriptions are under the radio show parts.
 I don't know if it's the old show or just the old descriptions, don't have a chance to listen yet.

 Megan
 

 Megan, you are correct - I fixed that.  I had it right on the members page,
 and it gets very confusing because both pages are named "index.htm"
 Maybe someday, we'll get bigger and we'll have an in-house ediotr.



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..
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