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  Show 70 is here   Radio Links below

 This is the show you've been waiting for.
 More comedy than outrage, but lots of outrage, too.

 You may not want your parents to hear this,
  you may not want your kids to hear it,
  but BCR # 70 is the Shizzle!
 

by Bruce Yurgil 
   http://home.earthlink.net/~ifness/index.html


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In Today's Tequila Treehouse...
Saddam Story is Fiction? 
Ritter Says June Iran Attack 
Bart's Straw man is lame
"Parents" Actress Dies
It takes a pillage 
This is ...Bankruptcy
Kerry Pledges to Fight Bush 
Thieves Rob Mandalay Bay 
Shirley Temper?

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 Quote of the Day

"That joke is over. It has been replaced by tragedy" 
      -- Richard Belzer, on Arnold becoming 
          governor of a state he can't pronounce,    Attribution
 
 

 
Support Bartcop.com PO Box 54466 , Tulsa, OK 74155PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com


Volume 1512 -  Caught Up


  Weekend-Monday   March 12-14,  2005                                                                              Mike Malloy - 10 EST Weeknights on   AAR


















  Quotes

"He wants to talk with those who support his agenda.
  For critics of Bush's approach, there are a lot of other venues to express opposition."
      --White House spokesman Trent Duffy acknowledging that if Bush
         hears more than one opinion he has trouble making up his mind. Attribution
 

  Comments?


 Ex-Marine Says Saddam Capture Story is Fiction

..

  Click Here

  Excerpt:
 Ex-Sgt. Nadim Abou Rabeh, of Lebanese descent said "I was among the 20-man unit, including eight
 of Arab descent, who searched for Saddam for three days in the area of Dour near Tikrit, and we found
 him in a modest home in a small village and not in a hole as announced," Abou Rabeh said.

"We captured him after fierce resistance during which a Marine of Sudanese origin was killed," he said.

 He said Saddam himself fired at them with a gun from the window of a room on the second floor.
 Then they shouted at him in Arabic: "You have to surrender. ... There is no point in resisting."

"Later on, a military production team fabricated the film of Saddam's capture in a hole, which was
 in fact a deserted well," Abou Rabeh said.
 

 Of course, the press won't even look at this because it might prove what a phoney Bush is.
 The rich American press will do anything to cover for Bush - he gives them our Social Security money.

  Comments?



 Scott Ritter Says Bush Plans June Attack On Iran
  Hasn't Scott Ritter been right every time so far?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Scott Ritter dropped two shocking bombshells in a talk delivered to the packed houser. The ex-Marine
 turned UNSCOM weapons inspector said that Bush has "signed off" on plans to bomb Iran in June 2005,
 and claimed the U.S. manipulated the results of the recent Jan. 30 elections in Iraq.

 Ritter said that Bush has received and signed off on orders for an aerial attack on Iran. Its purported goal is
 the destruction of Iran's alleged program to develop nuclear weapons, but Ritter said neoconservatives in the
 administration also expected that the attack would set in motion a chain of events leading to regime change in
 the oil-rich nation of 70 million -- a possibility Ritter regards with the greatest skepticism.

 Ritter also said that the Jan. 30 elections, which Bush has called "a turning point in the history of Iraq, a milestone
 in the advance of freedom," were not so free after all. Ritter said that U.S. authorities in Iraq had manipulated the
 results in order to reduce the percentage of the vote received by the United Iraqi Alliance from 56% to 48%. .

 Comments?



 Subject: Bart --

 Brian Williams is so totally and constantly obsequious to the BFEE that he's just too embarrasing to watch.
 It's painful to see a supposedly grown man sticking his rear end up on national TV, just for Mr. Chimp's approval.

 Jack
 Salem, Oregon
 

 If you ever wonder if Williams is honest or a sellout whore,
 just listen to Rush praise the guy for 30 minutes at a time.

 Comments?



 Quotes

"Many of you have known and trusted me over the years.
  I promise you this, I'll never take that trust for granted"
      --Bob Schieffer, Bush's new puppet at CBS Whore News, whose brother
         just accepted an ambassadorship from the Giggling Bloodwort. But, of course,
         Bob will call them as he sees them, fair and balanced   Attribution
 

..
 

 Comments?


 Subject: Bart's Straw Man Is Lame

 Dude, always be careful when you poke at a bear from behind.
 

 Bart,
 Once again you bring up a "Straw Man" argument regarding torture.

 You wrote:

> Mort, that makes no sense,
> If the people who are trying to stop the Hydrogen bomb from going off in Manhattan realize they
> could be tortured, they'll refuse to interrogate and we'll lose the 10,000,000 innocent lives for sure.
> Something tells me you don't play a lot of poker...

 This is called a straw man argument, which is totally lame.

 Thanks you for explaining the art of debate to me.
 

 Most people being tortured don't know SHIT about anything!
 

 First, that's got nothing to do with the lines you just quoted.
 Second, as I've said 1,000 times, we're NOT talking about "most people."
 Why can't people understand that "on the rarest of occasions" means "on the rarest of occasions"

 Did I say we should torture everyone Bush doesn't care for?
 

 They are the VICTIMS of Bush's Bullshit, they were at the wrong place at the wrong time.
 You continue to promote this idea that we're going to stop some terrible nuke with torture.
 Right. That ain't happening! They're torturing innocent people Bart.

 That's why your "reasoning" is so lame...because you are "justifying" what the Nazi's did ...and if we become
 the new Nazi's, then many folks might want to actually nuke us, which is what we're trying to prevent.

 Best Regards,
 Rob
 

 Rob, you're probably a nice Democrat who's just in the middle of screwing up, but if you walk
 into my house and tell me I don't know what I'm talking, you need to be dead sure of your facts.

 One slap on one face doesn't equal 26 million people being murdered by the Nazis.
 Please don't suggest that it does.

 I'll bet you could win the debate you're having with whoever you're having it with,
 but you and I are talking about different things.
 

  Comments?


4wk

From now until the end of March,
"Not me" will double your order.

Order 1 get 1 free,
order 5 get 5 free,
order a dozen, get 2 dozen free,
you can't go wrong with a deal like that.


"Meet the Parents" Actress Dies

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Nicole DeHuff, Teri Polo's sister in Meet the Parents, has died of causes related to pneumonia. She was 30.

 She died Feb. 16 in Hollywood, four days after she reportedly checked into an LA hospital, was misdiagnosed and
 sent home with orders to take Tylenol.  When her condition worsened, she returned to the hospital and was prescribed
 antibiotics for bronchitis and again sent home. Two days later, paramedics were called to her home after she collapsed,
 gasping for breath. By the time she reached the hospital, she was unconscious and passed away soon after.

 She is survived by Palitz, her husband of four years
 

 And what will he get for having his life destroyed by a doctor's negligence?
 Under the Bush plan, he'll get a pat on the head and a check for about 1/100th of his wife's earning potential.

  Comments?


 Subject: Show 70

 Bart,

 Show 70 is a hoot.
 The bit about the guns and the ephedrine was great.

 I quit reading stuff like that long ago because it is so stupid it makes me mad too.
 Gee, I should have started a radio show to rant about it.

 Thanks for doing what you do.
 Keep swinging the hammer.

 Mags

  Comments?



 It takes a pillage

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 After a while those questions at the back of your mind start bubbling up to the point where you start
 addressing them to others - usually just at the point where you think you might know the answer.
 The question I've had for the last several months has been this one:

 Where are Bush and his corporate cronies planning to live once they finish asset-stripping the United States?

 When I talk about how they are asset-stripping us, I'm not just talking about things like the bankruptcy bill
 and other more obvious policies that isolate the United States (such as alienating the UN and forcing Europe
 to take a containment position toward America), I'm also looking at the way they've been moving both military
 and industrial intelligence to other nations, chiefly China. Out-sourcing means more than just giving your job to
 some guy in China; it means that while the Chinese are learning to do your job, Americans are not.

 Comments?


 This is ...Bankruptcy

 Saturday morning I was up at the crack of dawn, (7:30) and surfing thru the TV channels.
 I came across "This is Elvis", so I watched for a few minutes.

 After the obligatory weeping asnd gnashing of teeth, they started over with the beginning.
 They showed the tiny shacks in Tupelo where Elvis grew up, while he did a voiceover
 explaining how, in the early years of his life, he grew up with less money than a Democrat.

 Elvis explained that his daddy was a sharecropper, which means he was a farmer who had
 to share his earnings with the owner of the land. Elvis said Daddy wasn't always around - that
 once he did a stretch in prison for writing a bad check to buy some food for them to eat.
 Damn, no wonder he had gold-plated everything after striking it rich.

 But it reminded me of the Illegal Thug who's busy raping America.

 This new bankruptcy law (which gets a lot of time in BCR #70) is a damn scary thing.

 Sidebar:
 Have you ever wondered why most of TV is cop shows, medical shows and lawyer shows?
 It's because cops, doctors and lawyers can be involved in extremely heavy drama.
 If your job is accounting or making ice cream or laying carpet - there's not much drama.

 But if you're a cop responding to a domestic disturbance, you vould have heavy drama.
 If you're a doctor getting a "Code Blue," you've got somebody's life in your hands and if
 you're a lawyer, the judge will tell you to stand just before announcing the fate of your client.

 Under this new bankruptcy law, there's going to be plenty of drama.

 As always, there's nobody on the entire Internet who will speak for the Criminal Monkey,
 so I haven't heard anybody answer some simple questions about this new bankruptcy law,
 but we're going to have heavy drama thousands of times each day in our new Amerikkka.

  Comments?



 Irritated Iraqis Wait for Change
  Six weeks after, people who risked their lives to vote wonder why they did.

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 With Iraqis increasingly concerned about a security vacuum, the man who is expected to become
 the next prime minister on Saturday defended the winning blocs, which have not formed a government
 nearly six weeks after millions of people risked their lives to vote.

 Ibrahim Jafari, the winner of Bush's sham elections said it could take two more weeks to close a deal.
"It's not a simple experiment," Jafari said, trying to explain the delay in forming a government.
"It's hard work - everybody knows that."

"I am not only frustrated, I am ready to burst with anger. We put our souls in the · palms of our hands
 and went to the ballot centers. You remember the threats there were that they would kill people who voted.
 If they cannot form a government, then I think they are not qualified to manage the country's affairs.
 This vacuum of power increases the number of terrorist acts, it opens the way for the terrorists," said
 shopkeeper Mohammed Saddoun, apparently the only Iraqi who didn't fall for the Monkey Shuffle.

  Comments?


 Subject: David Brock's book

 All this cover up involving the fake journalist reminded me of something I read in the book
 Blinded by the Right, by David Brock, page 241, referring to a meeting with Armstrong Williams:

"I had interviewed Williams at his Dupont Circle office and on the telephone several times, and we had kept in touch
 since the books publication, (The Real Anita Hill, by David Brock) though we hadn't spoken at length since I had
 come out as gay in the Washington Post eight months before. Williams invited me to discuss Strange Justice over
 dinner at a Tex-Mex place on the hill, then asked me back to his apartment for a drink."

"Sitting on an overstuffed sofa not far from me, Williams had something besides Strange Justice on his mind.
 As he began to pepper me with graphic questions about whether I was dominant or submissive in bed, I shuffled
 uncomfortably in my seat, looked away, and tried to change the subject. Williams, who is unmarried, countered
 with increasingly lewd banter until I quickly brought the conversation to a close, thanked him for his time and got up
 and walked out...........Was he coming on to me?"*

(Footnote on this page)
*"Some years later, Williams was sued for sexual harassment by his producer and former trainer, who charged
  that Williams repeatedly kissed him on the mouth and grabbed his buttocks and genitals on business trips.
 The suit was settled out of court."

 Is there something here that needs more investigation?
 This may be another Jeff Gannon story.

 Cfloyd
 

 Comments?


scottmcclellan@whitehouse.gov


 Subject: torture

 Goddamnit, torture is never, ever ok.

 OK?
 VTC
 

 VTC, I agree with you - 99 percent.
 The "never" part moves away from logic and I worry when that happens.

 Comments?


 Kerry Pledges to Fight Bush on Alaska Oil
  Kerry pledges to fight?  Is this a "fool me twice" situation?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Kerry pledged Thursday to lead the fight against President Bush's proposal to drill for oil in Alaska,
 sounding a call to arms for environmentalists to combat the administration's energy policies.

"The only mandate this administration has is for unity, to find common ground," Kerry told The Chronicle.
"The American people did not vote to drill in ANWR."

 Kerry characterized the president's plan for the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge as a "phony, absolutely
 fraudulent offering," which vastly overstates the potential to reduce gas prices or the nation's reliance on
 foreign oil. He called it the "ideological linchpin" to a broader, more reckless environmental policy.

"They need to be called out on it, and I intend to do it," Kerry promised - again.

 Comments?



 Subject: Notes on Bartcop Radio Show #70 - Not a Flaming Nazi Gasbag

  Show 70 is an excellent hammer.

 I think you're right about the oil prices.

 I disagree with your rant about basketball.

 Kobe Bryant is a hypocrite.

 The baseball question is: 'Do the fans really want steroids stopped?'
 Do they want the balls to stop flying out of the parks?

 I liked your comments about whore Russert.

 I know about Paul Harvey being 'the toothless horse molester.'
 But what is this about the Savage Weiner having sex with the dead?
 TomGo
 

..

 Weiner went to a Wax Museum in London and had sex with a mannikin.
 This picture is from his website, it's not a photoshop. .
 If wax sex was all I could get, I damn sure wouldn't post the pictures online.

 Thanks for the feedback.

  Comments?


 The Great Wall of Ice
  It's Vegas with ice instead of sand

..
                                All the structures are made out of ice

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 The temperature in Harbin reaches forty below zero, both Fahrenheit and Centigrade, and stays below
 freezing nearly half the year.  The city is actually further north than notoriously cold Vladivostok, Russia,
 just 300 miles away.  So what does one do here every winter?  Hold an outdoor festival, of course!
 The residents of Harbin celebrate the cold with an annual festival of  ice sculptures.
 

 All they need is Texas Hold "em, free, fine tequila and Playmate-looking hookers.

 Comments?


Click  Here  to read the FAQ

Click  Here  to increase your hits!


 Thousands rally against U.S. in Lebanon

..

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 More than 300,000 pro-Syrian protesters rallied in Lebanon on Sunday chanting "Death to America"
 and "Death to Israel", and denouncing U.S.- UN resolutions, it was reported.

 Some of the protesters were holding banners pledging loyalty to Syria and its president, Bashar Al Assad,
 and saying that the UN Resolution was as assault on Lebanese sovereignty.

"Syria remains in our hearts and our spirits," one banner said.   Other banners proclaimed in English "Shut up Bush,"
"Bush, we don't need your democracy" and "Bush, nobody likes a giggling murderer."

..

 Comments?


 Subject: your greatness

 Bart, I just finished Show 70 and I'm still laughing out loud.
 That was the funniest two hours I ever spent on the internet.

 I'll bet if you would just give the masses a little sample of your greatness
 they would stand in line for hours for the opportunity to subscribe because
 your radio show is the greatest thing I've ever heard - ever.

 Did I mention BCR # 70 was great?
 So many people should subscribe that you should be rich.

 Eman Ekaf
 

 Eman, please, ...you're embarrassing me.

 But here's that sample you suggested.

 Click  Here  to hear a very low-fi sample of BCR 70

 Click  Here  to get 70, 69 and 68 delivered on six Hi-Fi CDs  (Punch in $24)

 Click  Here  to subscribe and listen to all 70 shows
 
 

 Comments?



(Must be 18)


 Thieves Rob Mandalay Bay Casino

..

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 The men targeted a coin cage near the House of Blues. They were wearing nylon masks, and one of them
 jumped the cage counter to get the cash out. The robbers were confronted by security as they tried to escape.
"When they were challenged by security one of them fired a starter pistol into the air," said Las Vegas News 3.

 No one was hurt. That shot was not fired on the casino floor. The robbers stole an undisclosed amount of cash
 and escaped in a small gold colored car. Their mutilated bodies are expected to be found in the desert next week.

 Comments?


 Ten Things girls need to know about a boy's privates
  These scientific facts help you choose abstinence,   by Pickles Bush

..

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 When a boy's private goes inside of a girl, there is a serious risk of it breaking off and
 causing excruciating pain while it travels throughout your body like a giant trichinosis worm.

 Comments?



Marty's Entertainment Page


 NRA Opens Branch Office in Milwaukee

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 A gunman opened fire Saturday at a church service being held near Milwaukee,
 killing seven people before taking his own life, authorities said.

 The suspect had a handgun and, like they all are, was affiliated with a church,
 that had been meeting at the hotel every Saturday morning for four or five years.

 Wayne Lapierre, Head Goose at the NRA said, "This is what keeps America free."

 Comments?



 Quotes

"Whether you call it "a crisis" or not, some group data out there that says the American people don't like
  the word "crisis" associated with it.   So what!   It is what it is.   Leadership is telling people the truth."
     --Rush, explaining why Bush is a failed leader - because he refuses to use the word "crisis"  Attribution
 

 Comments?


 Shirley Manson: Shirley temper
  Redheads don't have tempers - do they?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 She's wearing a black, fur-lined leather jacket and tiny cut-off jeans over black leggings
 and bright pink pop socks.  On 38-year-old Shirley, the effect is fabulous.

 This is a woman who expressed a wish for the Spice Girls to be "tarred and feathered" and who
 remarked that Jennifer Lopez had a beautiful face but she wanted to "punch it nevertheless".
"It's true that I have a big mouth," she admits. "It gets me into a lot of trouble and at times I wish
 I could curb myself a little more. But I can't change the way I am. I have strong opinions and
 I just leap in. What I don't get is why people find me scary."
 

 I do.
 Have you read any of Shirley's old interviews?
 You have to tease a wildcat for a year to make it that aggressive.

  Comments?


We've got lefty books by lefty authors.


 The Simpson Body Count

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Below is a list of celebrities who had the misfortune of running afoul of the Simpson gang.

 The list is incomplete, however; celebrities are continuing to meet their maker on a regular basis,
 while the Simpsons have managed to rack up a body count that would be the envy of the Soprano crime family.
 And yet the dark side of the Simpson family, friends, and associates remains mostly unexamined.

 Until now.
 

Comments?


Get six CDs (the last three shows) delivered for just $24.
 

Currently shipping...

BCR 68  double
BCR 69  double
BCR 70  double

  Click  Here  to get the latest BartCop Radio Shows

Click  Here  for membership - listen to all 70 shows


 Bev Harris - paid speaker?

  Click  Here
 

 Harsh words for Bev if you click that link.

..

 I knew she was crazy when she wrote that Ol' Bart had filed some lawsuit to help Der Monkey
 and then she turned around and filed that help-Monkey lawsuit her own very damn self!!

 Poor woman - her poker hand is one spade shy of a flush.

  Comments?


Bush's U.S. soldier body count in Iraq
 

1511, 1513, 1516 dead soldiers under Bush

Three more  families destroyed since Friday.
 


 

How many more, America?
 

http://icasualties.org/oif/


 Britney Spears' marriage on the rocks?

 ..
      "I got married twice last year?"

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 In Touch Weekly claims Kevin Federline, 26, has been socialising on a regular basis
 without his 23-year-old wife, who he wed in September after a whirlwind romance.

 Life and Style Weekly claims Federline's behaviour has prompted Spears to re-consider
 starting a family.  "It has occurred to Britney that Kevin isn't a great help in cleaning up after the dogs
(Bit Bit, Lacy Loo and Lucky). And he might not be too eager to be on midnight diaper patrol either."

  Comments?


..

 Subject: I'm just a Monkey

 WTF?

 My scribes ain't worthy of your Monkey Mail bullshit?
 Goddamn it, I sit here and make up these great diatribes and rants, full of
 thoughful things and great musings, and you're too scared to print 'em.

 Hell fire, I bought a goddamn used car from your nasty ass,
 the least you could do is print some of my crazed rantings.

 (He's lying - that's what monkeys do.)
 

 Hey, that dumb guy that said "Automatic pistols are gas-operated"?
 Tell 'im I said he was a f-in' idiot.
 The .45 calibre Model 1911 that HST "alledgedly" killed himself with, is a RECOIL-operated mechanism.
 The gas does nothing but exit the end of the barrel with the projectile.

 I think he meant "gas operated" the way your car is "explosion operated."
 If you don't know, all firearms are "gas powered," but the gas does not exit out the barrel.
 If it did, that would mean the bullet went the wrong way and your monkey ass would be dead.

 How stupid can a gun owner be?
 

 Now, if HST had really shot himself, there is a possibility that the weapon failed to return to battery,
 since a recoil operated automatic weapon mechanism depends on the resistance of the human hand that
 holds the weapon. In other words, if the human hand were rendered incapable of providing the resistance
 (as would happen if one were shot in the mouth, destroying the cerebral cortex), then the weapon would not fully cycle.

 I'm not sure I understand.
 Could you get a web cam and demonstrate for us live, some night?
 

 But, waddafuck do I know? I'm just another dumb monkey.

 I know, and it's cruel that we get so much entertainment from watching you try to think.
 I'll bet you could make sense talking to Bush, tho...
 

 Your friend,
 Leffler the Monkey
 

  Comments?



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..

 Shrl, call  The BartPhone, just to say "Hi!"
 Plus, leave an e-mail address and I'll make you a BartCop Member - for free!

 You can call the Bart-Phone at 918-748-1714
 That would be really cool, and we'll catch you in Vegas at The Joint on your next American tour.


 bartcop.com  and BartCop are trademarks of attempts at humor.



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