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In Today's Tequila Treehouse... Novak Recycles Gannon  War profits up 284 %  Iran calls Bush "fag" Lead Bush by the nose  Bush confident in Rove  Shaq gets $100M deal Who Pays for Patriotism?  Cath's been everywhere  Christine Taylor baby   Quote of the Day "Bolton arrives at the UN    with a cloud over his head."       --Sen. Harry Reid, who, so far,          has not apologized to Mr. Rove                                     Attribution

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 Quotes

"There was an over-reaction after 9/11.
  Bush was given enormous powers and misused them. He created a war in Iraq
  that has further helped bust the economy, and has led to civil war there. He was
  the wrong leader at the wrong time. I always felt that. I wish I was wrong."
       -- Must remain Nameless    Attribution
 

  Comments?

 Novak Recycles Gannon
   saw it on  consortiumnews.com

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Right-wing columnist Robert Novak's new attack on former Ambassador Joseph Wilson
 - that he was "discarded a year ago by the Kerry presidential campaign"- recycled a
 disputed report from Talon News correspondent Jeff Gannon, who was unmasked
 earlier this year as a pro-Republican operative working under an assumed name.
 

 Even with Novak rubbing the press whores' noses in Bush's hookergate,
 they STILL choose to protect Bush instead of telling the truth.
 

  Comments?

 Quotes

"Close to a zero-percent chance"
      --Al Gore, on running for office ever again,     Attribution
 

 Al, we understand.
 Can you talk Kerry into the same decision?
 

  Comments?

 Halliburton: War profits up 284 percent
  Why start a war if there's no money in it?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Halliburton announced on Friday that its KBR Pentagon War Contracts division experienced
 a 284 percent increase in operating profits during the second quarter of this year.

 The profits were due to the Pentagon's payment of "award fees" for "very good" work
 done by KBR in the Middle East for America's taxpayers and the troops.

 Despite the scandals, the Pentagon awarded $70 million in "award" fees to the company,
 for their "very good" work under the Army's LOGCAP contract.

 The Pentagon has provided preferential treatment to Halliburton on a number of occasions,
 including the concealment from the public of critical reports by military auditors.

 Audits conducted by the Pentagon's Defense Contract Audit Agency determined that
 KBR had $1 billion in "questioned" expenses (i.e. expenses which military auditors consider
 "unreasonable") and $442 million in "unsupported" expenses (i.e. expenses which military
 auditors have determined contain no receipt or any explanation on how the expenses were disbursed).

 But the top Pentagon brass ignored these audits and rewarded KBR's work anyway.
 

..
 

  Comments?

 Iran calls Bush "fag," war looms
  Tells Bush 'Bring it on," smell of oil fills the air

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Iran said on Tuesday there was no going back on its decision to restart nuclear fuel work,
 a move EU leaders said would torpedo negotiations on Iran's atomic ambitions and spark
 an international crisis.

"The political decision has been taken ... The resumption is irreversible," Supreme National
 Security Council spokesman Ali Aghamohammadi told Reuters. He said that as far as Iran
 was concerned, the resumption had already begun.

 But he did not say the Iranians had actually broken the seals placed at the plant by U.N.
 inspectors, which would be a more decisive defiance of the international community.
 

 How about a pre-emptive, seal-saving military strike and occupation of oil-rich Iran?
 
 But then again, the BFEE has a history of success dealing with Iranian terrorists.
 That's how Bush first became president in 1981, along with his Reagan puppet.

..
 "Of course we didn't trade arms for hostages or fix the 1980 election.
  What do you think I am?  A traitor to America?

    ...wait, ...we did?

  My heart says we didn't, ...but the facts say otherwise."
 

 It's the same old script with a different simpleton.
 ...a script that will kill thousands and make the BFEE hundred of billions of dollars.

  Comments?

 Subject: BCR Show 79

 Hey Bart

 Show 79 was another great one, but I think the first part
 of Part 3 was a rerun from Part 1.

 It still sounded good the second time around.
 Keep pounding, my friend
 Grego
 

 Grego, that's certainly possible.
 To avoid erasing stuff, files have to be renamed constantly.
 Each edit has to renamed, f rom gunrant1 to gunrant2, ...like that.
 Late in the week, they all swim together in my head.
 
 I need a staff.
 

  Comments?

 Quotes

"I congratulate the Congress for completing
  a highway bill ...without raising gas taxes."
      --Bush, who's global murder spree costs taxpayers  $1,000,000,000 every day  Attribution
 
 

  Comments?

 Bush: 'complete confidence' in Rove
  He's confident the Dems won't make him step down

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Bush expressed "complete confidence" in Karl Rove on Monday, offering the first public
 endorsement since Rove's name surfaced in unmasking Valerie Plame. Bush urged observers
 not to "prejudge" a leak investigation that has legal and political peril for his administration.
 

 Why shouldn't Bush figure the storm is over?
 The networks, the cable Nazis and the talk radio liars said no crime was committed.
 

  Comments?

 Subject: this ain't about gun owners

 Bart - Pull your head out of your ass on the gun issue.

 ha ha
 You want to make this a clean fight or a dirty one?

 
 The lawsuit wasn't against law abiding gun owners.
 It was a suit against a bunch of well heeled businessmen who don't want to take
 responsibility for the 32,00 DEAD, mostly innocent, Americans as a result of the
 glut of firearms on the streets of this country. those who manufacture guns.

 I take it you're against all guns, all the time, for all reasons?
 I'm glad you have no chance of winning an American election.

 You have to learn the difference between a gun owner and a gun loon.
 If I understand, you're an anti-gun loon.
 That's giving the GOP the edge in every election for no good reason.
 

 They are, like Walmart and so many other corporate hucksters, failing to pass along
 the real costs of their product TO THEIR CUSTOMERS. As a result, other law abiding
 tax payers like me are forced to bear the astronomical costs of this product.

 Go after the makers of the Tec-9s, if you want or the easily-modified whatever
 the crazy guns are, but keep your hands of my guns if you don't mind.
 In a nation with 200 million guns, you're crazy not to be armed.
 

 Don't be a sucker for the NRA, which is run by a bunch of Nazi wannabees and financed by
 the gun industry. My father, husband and brother are all hunters, and I know how to shoot a gun.

 So, you're not against all guns, all the time, for all reasons?
 You have failed to make your position clear.
 

 I also know marketing and have owned several businesses.  This isn't about the legitimate
 consumers of firearms and ammunition beyond having them pay the actual cost of the product.
 I don't know why some gun enthusiasts find this so difficult to comprehend.
 JRoush
 

 I can't debate this until I have a clue where you stand.
 Twice you mentioned what this isn't about.
 Care to mention what this is about?

 You're going after "well heeled businessmen who don't want to take responsibility,"
 without saying who those people are.

 That's a Tequila Treehouse no-no.
 

  Comments?

 Quotes

"George W. made his continuing contempt for the Senate official this morning,
  giving John "Mad Dog" Bolton a recess appointment, only days after Bolton
  confessed he lied to the Senate. Well, why not? Why should he be the only liar left out?
            --Steve Cobble,    Cobblestones
 
 

 What state is Rep. Cobble from?
 Oh, wait - if he's fighting back, this Cobble guy can't be an elected Democrat.
 

 Comments?

 Subject: BCR Show 79 and Mindspring

 Bart,

 I don't think you should make that call.
 Whoever answers is simply a low wage front line employee.
 They don't make enough to be subjected to that and they have no authority to change things.

 What you need to do, is call and ask for a manager.
 Then ask for that person's boss.
 It may take a while until you find the right VP.
 Then you look up their HOME number and call them.

 Believe me, they will make something happen.
 It has worked for me in the past!

 Jay in Orlando
 

 Jay, understood.
 In the mornings, I'm all ready to glass them.
 

  Comments?

 Heat, O'Neal agree on $100 million deal
   Is Shaq the 'Tiger Woods' of golf?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Shaquille O'Neal and the Miami Heat agreed Tuesday on a $100 million, five-year contract,
 one that presumably will keep the 12-time All-Star center playing past his 38th birthday.

"We wanted to make sure that Shaquille was being compensated well into his career,'' Rogers said.
"We also wanted to make sure he was paid his value.  It's about winning," he lied.
 

 Please.

 $100,000,000.00 will be paid to the giant if he drops the ball in a net?
 
 Basketball was invented for when football and baseball go on a break.
 Pro basketball is even more worthless than college basketball, which sucks totally,
 and they're going to give the giant $100M to stand amongst the shorter men?
 

  Comments?

 Quotes

"When you talk about a great actor,
  you're not talking about Tom Cruise."
    -- Lauren Becall, who can "handle the troot,"   yesterday's USA Today
 

 Subject: Comments?

 Comment?
 What the fuck for?

 I've sent you ten comments and you haven't even given me
 the courtesy to say "thanks" or "that sucked, dude," nothing.
 
 Why do you even put up that link?
 Understandably pissed-off Derek
 

 Derek, that's just a bit we do.
 All the letters are fake to make me look good.
 

  Comments?

 Subject: Apple's dad?

 Say wha?
 I'm pretty baffled by your comment last issue:

>  "Apple's Dad was mentioned, too"

 Do you mean Noah Wyle, who I *think* played Steve Jobs (one of the founders
 of Apple Computer) in some movie?
 Fiona Apple?
 Owie Bart, you made my head hurt!  ;-)

 At least Stevie's a firebreathing Dem....

 Being a curious dude I googled Steve Jobs and vegetarianism and came up with this:

 Steve Jobs tired of being a vegan "I just want a big juicy hamburger."    (a humor site  ;-)

 Keep on, my friend
 ROT
 

 ROT, the famous rock band Coldplay has a singer named Chris something.
 He was voted "sexiest male" by the Veggimanians - his wife Gwyneth
 named their daughter "Apple," it was in the celebrity gossip columns.
 
 

   Comments?

 Quotes

"America has gone more than six months without a permanent ambassador
  to the United Nations. This post is too important to leave vacant any longer,
  especially during a war (I started) and a vital debate about U.N. reform."
      --Murder Monkey, ready to go "Fallujah" on the United Nations,    Attribution
 
 

  Comments?

 Subject: corn

 Ok Bartcop Bixby corn does rock

 I had the opportunity to get some on the 19th when I was in Tulsa.
 It grills up nicely - has excellent flavor, and shame on you if you salt and pepper those golden ears.
 The only additive it needs is 100% pure butter slathering.

 But good sir, I will with hold judgment until next year I feel more sampling
 is most defiantly need in this Endeavour so until next year
 after second sampling will I speak of it being the very best!!!!!

 With respect and 100% butter wishes,
 Roo
 

  Comments?

 Lead Bush around by the nose
  just like the NRA and BIG OIL

  Click  Here

 
 Note:
 Don't be drinking milk when you open this.
 

  Comments?

 Quotes

"I consider [Gitmo justice] to be a severe threat to the reputation of the military
  justice system and even a fraud on the American people. Surely they don't expect
  that this fairly half-arsed effort is all that we have been able to put together after
  all this time.  ...writing a motion saying that the process will be full and fair when
  you don't really believe it is kind of hard, particularly when you want to call
  yourself an officer and lawyer."
     --Maj. Robert Preston, "Gitmo trials rigged",  Attribution
 
 

  Comments?

 Subject: I don't understand

 Bart,

 I have tried to post a few comments recently and the
 transmission is extremely slow, so much so that I usually just bag it.

 Are you blocking my stuff?
 If so, why?
 Did I write something really bad?
 Or is my browser screwed up?

 Jaby
 

 Jaby, I'm guessing you're talking about the BartCop Forum?
 That's run by some BartCop readers - I don't get in there a lot.
 Odds are if you screwed up, you'd know about it.

 As a rule, it never hurts to "empty your cache," when there's a problem.
 I've gotten mail asking, "Why haven't you updated the page this week?"
 when there was a new issue every day - so some people do have that problem.

 Also, posting this here means the forum moderators will see this.
 Maybe they can create an account for questions like yours...

 ...and thanks for writing.
 I imagine there are others who hit a wall and thought "Screw them,"
 when it's real possible it was just a technical hitch of some kind.
 

  Comments?

..
   Click

 Subject: Donation

 Bartcop, I have been using you since 99, you are awesome.
 I live in north alabama, may as well be oklahoma, actually it is worse.
 I am a bill clinton straight voting dem. since 96.

 I hope this helps and I want you to know we are out here, some are just silent.
 please send worst pres. ever sticker and a cd or 2.
 peace
 Frankie Fontaine
 

 Dude, thanks!
 Stickers and CDs are on the way.
 

 You can donate with PayPal...or  snail mail.

 bartcop.com
 PO Box 54466
 Tulsa, OK  74155

  Click  Here to subscribe or donate
 

..

  Comments?

 Reno Bishop Is Key Witness
  Why move the rapists from parish to parish?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Former Bishop Phillip Straling of Reno has been named as a key witness in more than
 150 lawsuits in Southern California against priests accused of molesting children.

 150 victims - and that's just the ones who decided to come forward.
 

 Straling himself is not accused of abuse. The suits allege that he knew or should have known
 that some priests were having sex with children in his former Diocese of San Bernardino,
 but that he did nothing to stop them, according to the Reno Gazette-Journal.
 Some suits accuse Straling of negligence, but don't identify him by name.
 

 It keeps getting bigger and bigger. The Catholics have settled rape lawsuit in Reno, Chicago,
 Fargo, Minnesota, Buffalo, Toronto, Winslow, Sarasota, Wichita, Tulsa, Ottowa, Oklahoma,
 Tampa, Panama, Mattua, LaPaloma, Bangor, Baltimore, Salvador, Amarillo, Tocapillo, Pocotello
 and Amperdillo

 and facing more lawsuits in

 Boston, Charleston, Dayton, Lousiana, Washington, Houston, Kingston, Texas (County) Monterey,
 Fairaday, Santa Fe, Tollaperson, Glen Rock, Black Rock, Little Rock, Oskaloussa, Tennessee,
 Tinnesay, Chickapee, Spirit Lake, Grand Lake, Devil's Lake and Crater Lake

 with settlements pending in

 Louisville, Nashville, Knoxville, Omerback, Shereville, Jacksonville, Waterville, Costa Rock
 Richfield, Springfield, Bakersfield, Shreveport, Hakensack, Cadillac, Fond du Lac, Davenport,
 Idaho, Jellico, Argentina, Diamondtina, Pasadena and Catalina,

 with lawsuits already resolved in Pittsburgh, Parkersburg, Gravelburg, Colorado, Ellisburg,
 Rexburg, Vicksburg, Eldorado, Larimore, Ardmore, Habastock, Chadanocka, Shasta,
 Nebraska, Alaska, Opalacka, Baraboo, Waterloo, Kalamazoo, Kansas City, Souix City
 Cedar City but the case filed them in Dodge City was dismissed when the victim committed suicide.

 What a pity...
 

  Comments?

 Who's Paying for Our Patriotism?

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 Bush assures us that the ongoing twin wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are worth the sacrifices.
 Editorialists right-wing media bosses around the nation agree and say that American was
 willing to stay the course. Should anyone be surprised by this national resolve, given that
 these wars visit no sacrifice of any sort -- neither blood nor angst nor taxes -- on well over
 95 percent of the American people?"
 

   Comments?

 Subject: Ben Stein

 Bart:

 Did Tally ever tell you her Ben Stein story?
 She published the story on her own website.
 It's priceless.

 Maybe in honor of Stein's Watergate pimping we should
 get her permission to run it or link it?

 Jim H.
 

  Comments?

 Quotes

 Sen. Rick Santorum (R-Insane), was on This Week.  He was whining about
"radical feminists who are on a "mysogynistic crusade to make working
 outside the home the only marker of social value and self-respect..."

 When asked who he was talking about, Scrotorum said:

"Well, I mean, you know, you have -- you go back to, what's her name,
  ...well, ...Gloria Steinem, but I'm trying to remember -- I can't remember
  the woman's name.   It's terrible.   Anyway..."
 

 Gloria Steinem?
 Have you heard her name in the last ten years?
 And that's America's "great threat?"

 If Scrotorum is going to have the stupidest of the stupid send him money to
 stop a menace, shouldn't he have of a clue what and who "the menace" might be?
 

..
       Senator Rick  "Rawhide"  Scrotorum

  Comments?

 Subject: Bork & Bolton

 Greetings Bart:
 I was watching This Week on ABC last Sunday (31 July) and noticed something odd.

 When they were discussing the Roberts nomination they made the comment that Supreme
 Court nominations started to become increasingly partisan after the failed Bork nomination.
 They showed a clip of Bork being grilled by the Senate.

 And who appeared to be sitting in the front row behind Bork?
 It sure looked like John Bolton to me. Can you confirm this?

 If true, does this mean anything? I don't know.
 Just thought I would throw it on the fire and see if you can do anything with it.

 Keep up the great work,
 Stan
 Durant, Oklahoma
 

 Stan, maybe someone can come up with a picture.
 

  Comments?

 Litmus Test
    saw it on Daily Kos

  Click  Here

  Excerpt:
 I suggest that we DID have a litmus test, and that Paul Hackett met every important point.
 It's just not any of the litmus tests that we usually hear about. While I am sure that all of us
 would have our favorite elements, they would have to include some or all of the following:

 Does 'distance himself' from the party or its leaders, or is he proud to be a Democrat?

 Does he talk like a bureaucrat or like a regular person?

 Does he make it clear that he opposes Bush and the Republicans?

 Does he back down when the corporate press/media or Republican pundits attack him,
 or does he stand by his words?

 Does he respond to the nationwide reaction of the left blogosphere,
 or does he assign it to a junior staff member?

 Does he sleepwalk through the campaign, or does he act like he wants to win?

 I don't know all of Paul Hackett's positions and, since I am an old school lefty I am sure
 I don't agree with all of them. But he passed the litmus test I have set out for Democratic
 candidate I will support with time and donations.
 

  Comments?

..
           Click  to  Join

  ...you can make money - most players are drunk.

 Deposit $50 and the'll give you a $25 bonus.

 You can also play for pretend money.

  Comments?

 Daily Brew told me Rush has been calling Paul Hackett a "staff puke."
 
..
  Click  Here to hear Rush comment

 That means he hasn't really seen much combat, if any,
 that he's more of a pencil-pusher and order printer cartridges kind of guy.

 But...

 The vulgar Pigboy's show is broadcast to the troops in Iraq.
 How will they feel knowing when they get back,
 their sacrifice might be ridicules as "glorified secretaries."

 Do they have many "glorified secretaries" in Fallujah?
 
 
  Comments?

  Subject: 'Intelligent design' isn't even a theory

 Bush said that schools should teach the so called Intelligent Design theory in schools.
 Intelligent Design merely states that life is complex and had to be designed by "someone",
 and stops there. But when you ask who the designer is, they don't want to talk about that,
 because all of a sudden ID becomes a thinly veiled front for Creationism.

 If life requires a designer, then who is the designer and who made the designer?
 If you think through what ID is saying, you could conclude that God doesn't exist
 because something as complex as God couldn't "just happen".

 The difference between science and fictional beliefs is that science isn't afraid of scrutiny.
 Those who promote ID run when you ask the question, "Who is the designer?"

 Science isn't afraid to think things through and ask the tough questions.
 Trying to rename Creationism as Intelligent Design is dishonest, and Christians
 aren't going to win over any souls by being caught taking liberties with the truth.

 They should think about their own commandments about bearing false witness.

 Marc Perkel
 Church of Reality founder
 San Francisco, CA.
 

  Comments?

 Ben Stiller, Christine Taylor Have Baby

..

  Click  Here
 

  Comments?

 Read the  Previous Issue

 It had  everything.

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..
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