Quotes
"If one were to measure progress on the number
of suiciders, if that's your definition of success,
I think it gives -- I think it will
-- I think it obscures the steady, incremental march toward democracy
we're seeing. In other words, it's
very difficult -- you can have the most powerful army of the world
-- ask the Israelis what it's like
to try to stop suiciders. ...That's the -- but that's one of the main
-- that's the main weapon of the enemy,
the capacity to destroy innocent life with a suicider.
...Trying to stop suiciders -- which
we're doing a pretty good job of on occasion -- is difficult to do.
And what the Iraqis are going to have
to eventually do is convince those who are conducting
suiciders who are not inspired by al
Qaeda, for example, to realize there's a peaceful tomorrow. "
-- Dubya, trying so hard to sound like an adult,
Link
"I
hear the voices..."
Subject: taxes on $40K a year
Hi Bart,
I was intrigued by Hastert's statement that a
2-person family who earns $40k/year won't pay any taxes,
so I ran it through my tax program to see if
it was true.
I presumed a 2-person family to be a married couple
filing jointly.
I chose New Hampshire for the state so as to
not introduce any state taxes into the equation.
Attached is the screenshot.
You will note that I would owe $2,300+ in taxes.
That doesn't even include the medicare/soc. sec
that I didn't include (and
which, I note, isn't deducted anymore once you
cross the magic barrier).
How did Dennis Hastert arrive at his no-tax result?
- Tab
Tab, he lied because he knew the press and the Democrats would
let him get away with it.
Subject: Clinton marriage
Why isn't this Repugnicant icehole pointing out
that Pickles is touring New England by herself?
Why don't we hear about how many days the Putsches
spend apart from each other every month?
By the way, Pickles is going to do some photo
ops for other Repugnicant iceholes who will hopefully
be sent home in November by herself because BabyDoc
is no longer considered a good photo op.
I wonder how many taxpayer dollars are being spent
so Pickles can help re-elect Repugnicants?
Regards,
Big Tom G
Owner, operator, chief cook, bottle-washer and
ranking Pokerfest winner
www.funnyfarmonline.org
Pickles Travels without W or opinions
Excerpt:
First lady Pickles Bush, whose approval rating
is roughly double her murdering husband's,
is going places the president would be less welcome
and leveraging her popularity to raise money
for Republicans in tough races this fall.
Hmmm, this clearly looks like a marriage on the rocks, probably
due to his drunken rages.
Der Monkey grew up with the humiliation of his parents fawning over
the smarter, younger Jeb,
and now everybody likes his "better half" more than him because she's
only killed one person.
"I don't like to talk about that..."
Plus, it should be pointed out that since she has no opinions about
anything, it's easy for her to have
a higher approval than her husband. If she was allowed to have
an opinion, she might admit that she is,
in GOP hate language, "a baby killer" and that's good for a quick a
40-point drop.
I'm holding a Sharpie pen in my hand - nobody dislikes a Sharpie peen,
right?
That's because a Sharpie pen has no opinions that might piss somebody
off.
TV Round Up
24
It was as exciting as it was could-never-happen.
With all the money they spend on that show, they
should hire some writers from Veronica Mars
so they could hurdle those massive logic sink
holes and tie up those massive plot loopholes
without making the audience giggle and roll their
eyes. It's basically a kid's show.
Lost
This show reminds me of Jon Voight in National
Treasure.
"Clues that lead to new clues that lead to
more clues that lead to even more clues."
Each week, the USA Today critic says, "I
don't know, either, just enjoy the ride."
All those tens of millions of dollars, and none
for a writing staff? (I don't watch it)
House
Great finale, great acting and great writing
makes it a great show.
It's now watched by 22M people or so, thanks
to that atrocious Idol.
Alias
Makes Lost
look like a primer for how to write a nuts & bolts series. (I don't
watch it) But each time
Sydney put on a new wig and a new costume (or
took one off) it was like having a new, sexy guest star
- without having to pay for a new, sexy guest
star. I saw the last ten minutes, and it turns out after five years,
all you need to be a good spy is the ability
to assemble Zeppelin's "The Object" and wham, you're a super spy!
Syd,
Mom, Dad and a friend
Idol
Pre-Show
Simon declared that goofy white boy Taylor Hicks
the winner on Tuesday.
(We watch only in Fast Forward)
Gee, I wonder who the over-30 women (their biggest
bloc) will vote for?
How can the biggest talent show in history find
such talentless losers?
Swear to Koresh, we had singers at Bart's Hard
Rock Island that were better.
Post Show
I can't believe the parade of has-beens and dweebs. (Don't they have
any musical connections?)
Carrie, Underwood, - OK, that's a decent star, but ...Al Joraugh? (sp?)
He sang scat with Paris - do you know what scat
is?
It's jazz slang for "crap," to put it nicely.
Next up was the imcomparable ...Meatloaf?
Eddie, are you kidding?
Then we endured the all boys sing-along, which I found much too gay.
Nothing against gays, but a stage full of singing dancing men does
nothing
for me.
I'll do a week of Kelly Pickler before I watch five minutes of men
singing & dancing.
In Okieland, they have cowboy bars where they all get liqoured up and
line dance.
When girls do it, I think it's extra sexy. When men do it, it makes
me cry.
Then Mary J. Blige sang Bono's One, which was OK, but she was
'pitchy."
Tony Braxton?
Is she still in the business?
I guess Charo had a previous engagement?
Then the girls came out and sang what we'll call a Shania medley.
Nuff said.
The Clay Aiken ambush was next - poor bastard.
He was more scared than Denise Richards.
And just in case Meatloaf and Al Jareaugh weren't faded far enough back
in history,
next up was Burt Bucharach, who wrote some real magic, ...in the
sixties!
But wait, can we make some money with a Psychic Hotline product placement?
Whitney - come back!
All is forgiven!
Then, finally, a real music star took the stage.
Prince came out and reminded these talent-starved people was real show
business looked like.
Subject: illegal immigration
I've heard a lot of criticism about Bush's plan
to stop illegal immigration.
Again the Democraps do nothing but piss and moan.
Other than making illegal immigration legal, opening
the boarders and offering citizenship
to everyone in order to recruit voters, what
have the Democraps come up with?
Daren the Republican
Daren, your crooked party controls everything - they have
for over five years.
Isn't it stupid to ask what party out of power is doing to solve
Bush's problems?
Subject: Clinton marriage
What I have seen of the
NYT article on the Clintons it sounds like a healthy marriage to
me.
Both partners are doing what they want with their
careers after raising a well balanced child.
When they have time together, there must be much
to talk about, instead of beer in front of the TV and quarrels.
No empty nest problems here. Sounds in many ways
an Ideal marriage after the child raising years are over.
LittleOwl
LittleOwl, you need to go back and re-read that article.
That story was written to get you to dislike and distrust the peace-loving
people who balanced the budget.
You see, if she-whose-name-we-can't-mention is a bad, bad person, and
she's the front-runner it stands
to reason that all Democrats are worse so why not save time and vote
for the guy who'll pardon Bush?
If you didn't get that from reading once, you need to re-read the article
until you hate them.
That's the job of the New York Whore Times - to get you to vote Republican
back to bartcop.com
man page
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