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BCR
147 is Here! |
Tuesday Jan 6, 2009 Vol 2267 - Gazamaul
 Quote of the Day "Senator Al Franken ... Has a nice,
|
In
Today's Tequila Treehouse...
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Listen to Mike on your computer
Quotes
"Here is a partial answer to my own question
of how should we behave, directed especially
to the next president and members of his or
her administration but also to all of use who will
be relieved by the change: We must avoid any
temptation simply to move on. We must instead
be honest with ourselves and the world as
we condemn our nation's past transgressions and
reject Bush's corruption of our American ideals.
Our constitutional democracy cannot survive
with a government shrouded in secrecy, nor
can our honor be restored without full disclosure."
-- Dawn Johnson,
the new head of the Office of Legal Counse, Link
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Obama picks Panetta for CIA
Excerpt:
Obama has chosen Leon Panetta, Clinton's chief
of staff to lead the CIA.
The choice of Panetta for CIA director was one
of the last major nominations
for Obama, who takes over from the Worst President
Ever on January 20.
Outside of his stint in the White House, where
he served between 1994 and 1997,
Panetta has relatively little experience in national
security matters.
He was a member of the Iraq Study Group, whose
recommendations for a phased
troop withdrawal were largely ignored by the
Bush bastards, who chose to increase
the U.S. military presence there instead.
Before joining the Clinton administration,
Panetta was a congressman between 1977 and 1993,
where he focused on budget,
nutrition and environmental issues.
CNN says Obama wanted somebody who didn't have torture blood on his
hands
so that meant he had to look outside the agency for somebody who is
untainted.
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Reid Rejects the Rule of Law
Excerpt:
How will it look if the Sergent at Arms bars
Burris from the Senate floor, but did nothing to
Harriet Miers and Karl Rove when they defied
Senate subpoenas? How will it look if they refuse
to accept Burris into the Democratic Caucus after
having accepted Joe Lieberman, who spent years
enabling the Bush bastards' crime and corruption
as Chairman of the Homeland Security Committee?
How does it look to be screaming about Burris's
'taint' when they did nothing for decades about
Ted Stevens, and gave him a standing ovation
even after he'd been convicted? Or for that matter,
their inaction with regard to Larry Craig? How
does it look now that Reid is manipulating Senate
procedure to exclude Burris, but simply shrugged
his shoulders over Samuel Alito, warrantless
wiretapping and the Military Commissions Act?
Harry Reid has rejected Burris.
How did we get stuck with this loser/enabler/coward/idiot?
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Quotes
"Congrats to Al Franken...But I give it 48
hours before Harry Reid
issues his latest alibi why Senate
GOP-ers will still be running things."
-- HarpoSnarx, who has it exactly right, Link
Harry Reid always has 101 excuses for why he failed.
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Subject: BartCat
Dear Bart & Mrs. Bart --
My most heartfelt condolences on the passing
of Bartcat.
I don't expect you to remember each person who
writes you,
but I have mentioned many times over the years
my pre-disposition toward cats.
In my lifetime, I've adopted or cared for or rescued
dozens and dozens of cats.
They are my special creature on earth.
And, I feel it is justified, by their nature.
I've lived long-term with about a dozen, and I've
been there to give life to and to bury dozens more.
They have all been dear friends.
I'm so very sorry to hear that Bartcat has moved
on.
I grieve for you and with you; it's a pain that
never becomes easier. As it should not.
But, when you feel it, also remember the moments
when you laughed the most.
It's the best way to honor them. As with
all friends.
-- Geoff
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Pity the
Poor Neocons
by Robert Parry
Excerpt:
As bloody and grotesque as Israel’s pounding
of Gaza has been, it marks a bitterly disappointing end
for seven-plus years of neoconservative dominion
over U.S. foreign policy, a period that was supposed
to conclude with the dismantling of Israel’s
Muslim enemies in the region.
Contrary to those neocon plans, George W. Bush
is limping toward a historical judgment as possibly
“the worst President ever”;
U.S. power is waning in Iraq under a “status-of-forces agreement” that
is
showing the Americans the door by 2011 if not
earlier; and key neocon targets – Iran, Syria and
Hezbollah in Lebanon – have gained in regional
influence.
It figures.
After a year of fabricating lies and distorting
the facts to scream insults at Hillary,
Parry has to use "possibly" to describe Bush
as the worst president ever?
If he had given Hillary 1/10th of the respect
he gives Der Monkey
I might still care what Bob Parry has to say.
I wonder - in all those lies he wrote about Hillary
in 2008, I wonder if Parry
ever used the word "possibly" to mitigate his
senseless Hillary hatred?
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Quotes
"He is the weakest, most pathetic Majority
Leader I have ever seen. He can't seem to grasp
that he has the upper hand. Its either that
or he's a secret republican. How about a little use of
that power? Threaten to treat them the way
they treated Dems over the previous 6 years.
This is disgusting...Now if we can only chip
in enough money to buy Reid some testicles so he
can lead the Senate. Why won't he fight the
GOP's filibuster machine? Get his tired, weak ass
the hell outta there."
-- TN, speaking the kind of truth I like to hear,
Link
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.
Subject: Worst Speaker Ever?
Bart:
Let's not forget that raving lunatic Newty Gingrich.
Remember his first horrid day on the "job?"
Walking back and forth with his gavel like a salivating
madman.
Next to him, Pelosi (although she does indeed
blow) looks like a champion of liberal causes.
It was a great day when he was summarily tossed
out on his fat ass.
I just don't want the revisionist historians resurrecting
his stinking carcas.
Sabby
I'm no Newt fan, but he didn't take impeachment of the table.
Y'know, I'm not real smart.
I do better with big issues ...rather that the geeky details, but I'll
go on record as saying that telling
a greedy, blood-thirsty, oil-gouging, religiously-insane war criminal
in advance that he WILL
NOT
be held accountable for his future rapes, murders and tortures is a
crazy fucking thing to do.
"But bart,
when W shouts "Dance, you bitches,"
we dance!
Excuse me...
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Franken
Win Certified in MN
Sore Loser Coleman can't accept the facts
Excerpt:
The Minnesota State Canvassing Board certified
results Monday showing Al Franken
winning the recount over Norm Coleman (R-Prick)
who is expected to whine and pout.
Earlier today, the state Supreme Court rejected
the Coleman campaign’s petition to
count several hundred additional absentee ballots.
After this weekend’s tally of mistakenly rejected
absentee ballots, Franken was holding on
to a 225-vote lead. The Supreme Court declined
Coleman’s appeal to consider 654 more ballots.
I'm very happy about this.
I wanted to beat Saxby Chambliss, but this is just as good.
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Subject: pressure
I have a good idea what that kind of pressure
is, and what it means to
take care of deserving loved ones while you have
a pile of your own troubles.
I say good luck and post when you can.
Bill from ct
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Quotes
"Maybe when Hillary leaves the Senate for the
State department
she could leave one or two of her three
testes behind for Reid's use?"
-- DaddyD,
Link
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Subject: Thank you
Bart,
Without qualification, your blog has helped me
keep my sanity for years.
I look forward to every new issue. I thank you
from the bottom of my heart.
My wallet will try and give thanks to you mid-month.
I'll be thinking of your cats when I plant the
'nip this spring.
I don't envy you your new task - making a living
is getting harder for almost everyone...
Steve from Libby
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Marty's Entertainment Page
Marty always has good stuff.
Richardson, Obama Teams Trade Blame
Excerpt:
Sources within the transition and the Justice
Department said that Richardson had played down the
importance of the probe and did not reveal that
his office and staff could be at risk. The seriousness of
the matter became apparent after the FBI began
its own background check on Dec. 2. But Richardson's
longtime aides defended his disclosures, noting
that subjects under examination by a grand jury are rarely
aware of its secret deliberations.
"This was out there, and he told them," said a
senior Richardson aide. "I feel that they just missed the boat on it.
The FBI or the campaign or something. I don't
think it's fair that this is being portrayed as him holding anything back."
Yesterday, Richardson hired a prominent white-collar
lawyer to represent him in the investigation,
which centers on a California financial services
firm that won a lucrative contract from the New Mexico
Finance Authority after donating to political
committees linked to the governor.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog
Facebook
- inventing the idea to list
the countries
where their page is read.
Quotes
"The Weekly Standard’s Michael Goldfarb makes
the case that it’s appropriate and
praiseworthy for countries to deliberately
target the wives and children of people they
consider enemies. This kind of moral posture
is not unheard of, of course. But it’s strange
to see the ethics of Osama bin Laden being
explicitly adopted by the organs of mainstream
conservatism. To be clear, he’s not saying
that it’s sometimes okay to kill a bad guy’s
innocent children as part of a military operation
directed against the guy. He’s saying
it’s better to kill his children than
it would be to avoid killing them."
-- Matthew Yglesias,,
Link
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Subject: Wish you well
Hello Bartcop,
It sucks when you try to do the right thing and
it comes back to bite your ass (helping the old man.)
I know you don't believe in God but it goes to
show that you do not have to to have ethics.
Try explaining that to religious handjobs. May
things turn out well with the situation.
The one thing is that when you come back from
a hiatus, the next page you post is powerful.
You never disappoint, at least not me. I apologize
for telling you now that I enjoyed Bartcop #147
(I think I listened to it 3 weeks ago.) That
Jimmy Page solo peeled back my scalp and I was rolling
on the floor when you noted that, what, our F-16s
could not keep up with the Somali pirates?
I'm real sorry about Bartcat. I'm a cat lover
myself and I have this 6 1/2 month old kitten that
I would like to send to military school. I hate
it when the critter is smarter than me. I know you
would rather be writing a page daily, but I understand
you have do what you have to do.
Just watch yourself and don't get worn out in
the meantime because as long as we have our spineless
Dems blowing the ones without the power(see Mitch
the Bitch), we will be needing your, "I'm mad as hell..."
You are always what the doctor ordered. Please
send my regards to Mrs. Bartcop.
Best of luck and keep swinging that hammer,
Bert
Mrs. Bart is under much more pressure than me.
She has to deal with all this plus a 46-hour a week day job.
So far, she's holding up like the USS Missouri (a compliment).
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Subject: Mike the Dealer replies
I really don't have a place where I've stored
all my poker advice.
What I'd really ask of Mark and anyone who reads
my advice is.
1) What questions do you have about hold 'em in
general, like position/starting standards/
when to raise/the differences between tournaments/cash
games, etc. Once I know the topic
my audience is seeking advice on the more I can
do to shed light on it.
2) Do you have a hand you've played recently that's
been bugging you?
Lost with Aces and feel like you made a mistake?
I'm not looking for 'bad beat' stories like
"I flopped a set and got all in, and the guy
hits runner runner for a straight!" cause that's pretty
self evident that you got your money in really
good and just got unlucky.
I'm asking about a hand that went down to the
river and you don't know if you played it right.
I need as much info as possible (Cash/tournament,
what position you were in the hand, stack sizes
of you and your opponent, etc.) and then I can
puzzle over it, and then pick the brains of some of
my poker playing friends to go over the hand
and see what mistakes were made (If any) to try
to help you see a better line of action on your
play.
I'll have a new column written up by Wednesday.
-Mike the Dealer
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Can't Wait Until O'Reilly Announces Franken's Win
Excerpt:
Christmas vacation is over. Monday morning will
have the megamouths more than ready to take back
the Lords of Loud seats from unlistened to, exaggerated
drama-queens and notso best ofs. The broadcast
guys and gals will choppin' at the bit to get
to the real business of demeaning Dems and putting a wedge
between Americans. And they'll be more than ready.
Rush, Sean, Glenn and the wannabes who received
the gift of an overwhelming Republican defeat
will spend the next couple weeks building up the momentum
so that January 20th will kick off at two, four
or more years of blaming Obama and Democrats in power.
You think tearing apart every word and move by
Obama won't be a helluva lot more fun than the defending
of the Bush debacle? It's exhausting trying to
nail the powerless Democats for the demise of America.
Behind closed mikes, they'd admit that blaming
the recession on a president-elect was a contortion of
logic that even the Velvet Fog of talk radio,
Mark Levin, probably found a bit unweildy.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Subject: thanks
Bart--
I hated to hear about your recent struggles trying
to help a family member.
Hope you get things straightened out and back
to a more peaceful existence
(is it possible?) but know that dealing with
the dementia issue is frustrating.
On the positive side, we have a chance at some
sanity in the White House
for the first time in 8 years. Just remember
that your fans will understand when
you cannot post or produce the radio show, and
take it easy when you can.
Best wishes for 2009 to you and yours,
Morna
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Quotes
"Sources tell ABC News that officials on the
Obama Transition Team feel that before he
was formally offered the job of commerce secretary,
Bill Richardson was not forthcoming
with them about the federal investigation
that is looking into whether the governor steered
a state contract towards a major financial
contributor."
-- ABC News, Link
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Subject: swearing out ceremony for boy blunder
Bart,
I know you're old but did you ever hear National
Lampoon's "Missing Basement Tapes"?
It contained a swearing out ceremony for the
big dick. It was Rev Billy Graham:
"Gawd Damn you Richard Nixon! Richard Nixon,
you Son-of-a-bitch,
you lied your ass off to the American People.
Now fuck off!"
True, it is a return to your 'blue period' but
I think it would be fitting if we could provide
this same good-riddance to the worst president
in the history of the country.
Mark
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Reid says
no to Franken
Is Mitch the Bitch still running the senate?
Excerpt:
Harry Reid says he will not attempt to seat Al
Franken in the Senate today -- though they
are reiterating Reid's call for Norm Coleman
(R-Prick) to concede the race rather than drag it out.
The statement from Reid spokesman Jim Manley:
"Now that the bipartisan state canvassing board
has certified Al Franken as the winner, we hope
Senator Coleman respects its decision and does
not drag this out for months with litigation.
Shortly after Election Day, Coleman criticized
Mr. Franken for wanting a recount and wasting
taxpayer money. Now that it is clear he lost,
Coleman should follow his own advice and not
subject the people of Minnesota to a costly legal
battle. However, there will not be an effort
to seat Mr. Franken tomorrow."
Is Harry Reid really Alberto Gonzales with a mask?
How many hueueueuege mistakes can Harry make in one day?
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Subject: Bart, you wrote:
> Sidebar: If I had a dollar for everyone
who wrote to complain
> about that chupacabra joke - we'd have no
financial troubles at all :)
I loved that chupacabra joke bart!
It's classic Bartcop.
It's why we come here, Politics, Humor and a
Smart Mouth.
Love it!
Tim from BLUE STATE Indiana
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Subject: TQuigly rebuttal
Mr. Bart,
Thank you.
He means for running his letter and my reply
To answer your original question, 'what can he
do?'
He could get a set of balls and of ethics, that's
what he could do.
Objection!
I asked what Oboma could do to make you happy
and you respond with a physical impossibility?
Check out http://www.campaignforliberty.com/blog.php?view=7287
to see what
a genuine scholar and statesman would do, would
say. For 30 years Ron Paul has
insisted on speaking Truth, even when he stood
alone to speak it (people love
'Mr. Smith Goes To Washington' - Dr. Paul is
the present-day living embodiment of that ideal).
Paul is free to speak the truth because he's nobody.
If Paul was the President-elect, he'd have to
bite his tongue like Obama is doing,.
There are hundreds of marches and protests around
the world in response to
Israel's demonic and unprovoked invasion of a
defense-less country.
I knew it!
You're infected with that Israeli insanity gene.
You can''t think straight because you're too
close to the madness.
Obama remains silent to the death, hatred and destruction.
Obama might fumble the ball in the future,
but right now he's on the bench.
You want to comdemn him before he gets in the
game.
Mr. Bart, I know you are a humor site and we love
you for it. But please, take off
the Democratic/obama blinders - telling TRUTH
enhances, not detracts from humor.
And I remember just a few months ago I was called
"an Obama hater."
I have always been on the side of science, logic
and the facts.
One reason I get to claim that is because I'm
not religiously insane.
You, however, are not in a position to say that.
You may lose some present supporters if you do
tell the TRUTH, but you will gain credibility
and other supporters if you stand for TRUTH,
rather than for blind support of garbage.
Unfortunately, obama has proven himself
to be a dupe-maker even before he takes office.
Clearly, one of us is wearing blinders.
I have no dog in this fight, so whose really
wearing those blinders?
Anyway, we pray for Peace and Prosperity for All
in 2009.
Ia orana iti matahiti api (HappyNewYear in Tahiti)
Hozhi Nagahi (Dineh)
TQ, I think you're sincere - but you're wrong.
If you had the ability to look at that Middle Eastern madness like
I do you'd realize both sides
would rather fight, both sides would rather die than
give up their precious sacred fucking sand.
Israelis could move to Oklahoma and live to see their grandkids
get married but nooooooooo.
They'd rather placate some non-existent Cloud Being than protect the
lives of their kids.
That's the scourge of religious insanity and I'm too smart to fall for such horseshit.
How can an uneducated, tequila-drinking Okie see things so clearly
while those smarter than myself are still groping in the religious
darkness?
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From the "If there was a God" department...
Inauguration T-shirts!
Can't go to His Inaugural?
Be there in spirit with this bad-ass shirt!
Mens and women's shirts,
v-necks, doggie shirts, boxer shorts,
tank tops, hoodies, thongs, sweatshirts in
black, white, yellow, green and pink.
Get your historic shirt today!
Subject: Palin's grandkid a chupacabra?
My wife called just as I started reading your
Chupacabra
story in the last issue.
I was laughing so hard reading it to her that
I could barely get it out.
She was laughing at me because I was laughing
so hard. She asked where I was
reading that from and I said the Great Bartcop
of course. We shared a few more
Bartilicious giggles; she forgot why she called
and we reveled in your greatness for
another moment or two and went on to our mundane
lives.
If people still don't get your humor…well, maybe
they'll never get it.
Keep Swingin' Brother,
Jeff the Texas Democrat - There are very
few of us.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog
Quotes
"He's gonna come home with his head high, knowing
he ran a clean operation and
he kept this country strong and free after
an unprecedented history attack of 9/11.
He'll have a lot too be proud of and he can
start by his mother and father being
very proud of him...and we always will be.
You can go back to your, what do you
call it, your Google, and you figure out all
that"
--
Poppy Bush on his son, the murderer, Link
"I went to the Google and typed "worst president
ever" and guess who's name
came up in link after link after link? Poppy
Bush must have been on the Google too
just before this interview."
-- Gunsandbigots,
Link
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Subject: Al Franken
So the Senate Repubs are going to block seating of Al Franken...
They don't need to - they have Harry Reid blocking for them.
If the Democrats in the Senate had a pair (insert
your most disgusted question here...),
they would use the same rule to say "Fine, and
we'll keep Saxby and Mitch out
until Al is seated as well!" Not very likely...
SocDan
Harry Reid doesn't play that way.
He plays the surrender card every time.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog
What if we could guarantee
that
dozens of good Democrats will
see your banner for just $65?
Tired of blogging for just a few?
If your product is good, all
you need is exposure.
And don't forget the untapped overseas markets.
It doesn't
cost to advertise on bartcop.com
It
pays to advertise on bartcop.com
Banner ads by the day,
by the week,
or by the month
Subject: The Left and Clinton
Bart, to call Clinton the best president in 60 years is a more than a mere reach.
I disagree and I'll bet you can't back that up.
He went along with Newt Gingerich's Contract ON
America, pushing & signing NAFTA,
signing the T-Com Act of '96 and the Phil Gramm
bill that gutted the Glass-Steagall Act...
NAFTA and the Gramm bill can basically be tied
to our financial woes now.
None of that means anything because anyone can
criticize any president ad nauseum.
The criteria is - Name a president better
than Clinton in the last 60 years.
Clinton took the Reagan deregulation ball and
ran it up to the one yard line.
All Dubya had to do is fall forward to land it
in the endzone.
Yak, yak, yak - you're still not saying anything.
I'm no fan of Bush or The Cons but please, enough
with the rose-colored glasses
where Bill Clinton is concerned. He was
better than Bush, yes, but he also carried
the torch for Republican domestic policy throughout
his terms as well.
Spoken like a true Lefty, who's idea of the perfect
president has yet to be realized.
Well guess what - it's never going to happen.
You can't compare Clinton to perfection.
I'm asking you to compare him to the last 11
presidents.
When you do that, you'll learn I'm telling the
truth.
And I don't hate the Clintons, I just abstain
from both koolaid flavors.
Judy in Cleveland
I didn't ask you to drink anything.
If all you can think of are failures and mistakes
and bad decisons
when you hear Clinton's name, then I suggest
you do hate him.
Even after eight years of war, death and recession
Bush, you won't give
Clinton any credit for the eight years
of peace, surpluses and prosperity?
Republicans make their presidents into saints
- and the press buys into that.
Democrats hate their best - so the lazy whore
press goes along with that, too.
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Shopping online?
Use this Amazon
portal to orderl
and they'll send bartcop.com
four
cents
from each dollar you
spend.
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BCR 148
I've never wanted to do a radio show more than this one.
It's the weirdest story.
What happens when peace, prosperity, science and logic
gets kidnapped by old age, meth-heads and shit happens?
Sidebar:
If Artie Lange can reach the NYWTimes Number
One Best Seller List
then I have to think the BartCop Autobiography
would reach at least Number 40.
Somebody write me a big check so I can write
my story while there's time.
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If I was
the governor of Culli-fornia
I'd always
wear a shirt outdoors.
Check out the toons and stuff
We have tons of great 'toons on the Bart Blog!
Worldwide Bartcop
They read it in Zurich, Switzerland
They read it in Beamsville, Ontario, Canada
They read it in Alsea, Oregon
They read it in Mlaga, Andalucia, Spain
They read it in Feldkirchen-Westerham, Bayern, Germany
Want to sell stuff everywhere?
They have money - their economy isn't run by a religiously-insane moron.
Why sell to America when you can sell to the world?
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Subject: Donation
Not even a nomination?
Hi Bart, the problem is, you are quality.
Since when has quality been popular?
What was the last time you joined a bandwagon?
What was the last time you incited a mob?
What was the last time you stirred up mass hysteria
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We (the World) are going to need you more than
ever.
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Old Business
All WPE and Mooselini shirts have now been shipped.
If you've been waiting for yours, the wait is about over.
My apologies for not getting those to you sooner.
The printer's computer broke then the shirt people
took time off for Christmas.
Lately, life has been a real Dr.
Laura.
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Alizee, French Music Hottie
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