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Update!

Quote of the Day "God wants me to serve."     -- Norm Coleman (R-Insane)  Link

In Today's Tequila Treehouse... Blame Pelosi for Stumbles  Madness Can't be Real  Our Clever President  8 Busted in Phelps Pot Case  Fox Newser In Kiddie Porn  Whore AP's swimming hoax  A Monument To Zealotry  Catherine Bell Witch

Quotes

"The American public gives Obama a strong 67% approval rating
  for the way in which he is handling the economic stimulus bill."
     -- Gallop poll,    Link
 

 But the media keeps telling us the Republicans are winning this PR war.
 Then again, Gallup is part of the whore media - so who can we trust?
 

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Blame Pelosi for Democrats' stumbles
 by crusty old Jack Cafferty

 Link

 Excerpt:
Three weeks into the new administration and the Democrats are squandering their advantage.

It took a full three weeks?
There's a headline right there.

Credit Pelosi for getting the ball rolling. Under her leadership, House Democrats excluded Republicans from
having any voice in crafting the stimulus package. Acting like children who hadn't seen Santa Claus for eight years,
House Democrats busily loaded up the bill with stuff they had been unable to get for eight years. It was payback time...

Contraception, funding for the arts, restoration of the national mall, stop-smoking programs.
All while Americans lose their homes, their jobs, and their savings. It was both childish and disgraceful.

Apparently tone deaf to the disgust and disappointment of Americans, as well as the voters' desire for change
as represented by the election of Barack Obama, House Democrats set the table for failure -- again.

Not a single Republican in the House voted for the bill, despite efforts by our new president
to reach out to the other side. Nancy Pelosi strikes again.
 

But the problem is - Jack Cafferty can't be trusted.
I don't have time to read those bills.    Is what he says true?

If he's telling the truth - BIG "if" there - then I'll join him in denouncing Pelosi.
I thought I heard Obama say all that had been stripped away, so yes, shame on her for putting it in there
in the first damn place, but if the problem has been corrected, what is Jack Cafferty whining about?

Cafferty acts like GOP recalcitrance is proof that the bill is bad.
He knows better than that - he's just another lying media whore.

Wouldn't it be nice to live in a country where the press didn't lie?
 

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Quotes

"You watch (Obama's press conference) and you can see that every day Republicans keep this guy off TV
  is a win for them. Like every great pol, Obama's a great communicator. And he's making the argument."
      -- Josh Marshall, Link
 

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 Subject: The Party of George W. Bush

Yes, but unfortunately, and as is expected, the true believers are angry at Obama
for increasing the deficit, when they hardly even cared when Dubya was doing it.

I guess it's OK to borrow money to wage wars. It's only a problem if you want to 
create jobs, fix our crumbling infrastructure, and other Commie ideas like that.
 Stephen
 

And if the Democrats would point that out - how could they ever lose an election?

Bush CHOSE to invade Iraq so he could steal their oil and the Democrats laid down.
Obama CHOSE to stop Bush's job hemorrhage and the Fascist dogs attacked him for it.

If Joe Six Pack had any idea what the GOP did to him he'd be furious as hell
but as long as the Dems refuse to speak it, the only truth people hear is from the cable whores, 
the talk radio Nazis and the NYWTimes/WaHoPo, pro-GOP whore media.
 

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 Quotes

"Senator Cornyn (R-Rat Bastard) was at a New York gathering of prominent media conservatives and
Wall Street Republican donors called the Monday Meeting, held at the Grand Hyatt hotel in Manhattan.
Though not a fundraiser, the meeting is a hub of conservative money and buzz, a good place for Cornyn to
tap into resources in his role as chairman of the National Republican Senatorial Committee."
     -- Ben Smith, on the whereabouts of that rat bastard during the crucial stimulus vote,   Link
 

"Senetor Kennedy pushes his health to get on the floor to vote, while Sen Cornyn is out greasing palms.
  This shows why there will be fewer Repubs in 2010 than in 2008."
    -- arvid0823,   Link
 

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This Madness Can't be Real
Brit Tortured For Reading Humor Web Page

 Link

 Excerpt:
This is the man for whose case Obama is citing the state secrets act. This could be any one of us:

A British ‘resident’ held at Gitmo was identified as a terrorist after confessing he had visited a ‘joke’ website
on how to build a nuclear weapon, it was revealed last night.  Binyam Mohamed, a former UK asylum seeker,
admitted to having read the ‘instructions’ after allegedly being beaten, hung up by his wrists for a week and
having a gun held to his head in a Pakistani jail.

The story claimed that a nuclear weapon can be made ‘using a bicycle pump’ and with liquid uranium
‘poured into a bucket and swung round’.

It was this confession that apparently convinced the CIA that they were holding a top Al Qaeda terrorist.
 

For more on the Origins of this story  Click  Here

There's probably no way Obama can "lose me" on this subject, because where else can we go?
But if he's backing the torture of people for reading humor web sites, how much did we really gain in the last election?

Can we get a reporter to ask him about this at a live, televised press conference?
 

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 Subject: history repeats itself - but why?

Bart,

Disillusioned is right.  And...also the Republicans are not done destroying this country.
They want the government deader than Vince Foster and they want it now.

Then the wealthiest of them can swoop in and take over all the publicly owned utilities, services,
land and natural resources and start charging us for them.  I don't know where they think we're
going to get the money to pay.  I imagine the rich want us all in work camps as slaves.
Eat the rich - and start soon.
 Ellen
 

One of the biggest problems is the super-rich aren't happy.
They have all those billions yet they must steal more to feel fulfilled.
Same way with the oil bastards - $10,000 profit per second wasn't enough - they wanted more.

Until the Democrats muster the sac to tell them "No," they'll continue to steal more
 

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Quotes

"Ari Fleischer, who regularly called on a male prostitute to ask scripted questions is outraged,
  OUTRAGED, that Obama took a question from the Huffington Post."
     -- POAC headline,  Link
 

 BTW, Jon Stewart pointed out, the Huffy Post guy asked about torture.
The whore from the Washington Post asked about baseball and steroids.
 

"Senate Democratic leaders have painted a very bleak picture of the U.S. economy...
 How are you going to work with people who seem to have divorced themselves from reality?"
  -- Jeff Gannon, Bush's top, asking him a question at a press conference in January 2005,  Link
 

 Bush knew what he was doing calling on his personal prostitute - how do we know?
 Because Bush never had the courage to take a question from a stranger.
 

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Our Clever President
 by Tony "Rush strain syphilis" Blankley

 Link

 Excerpt
Obama's first news conference was performed feebly by the once-ferocious White House press corps (He means 1998)
and shrewdly -- if deceptively -- by the president. In the six years I did communications on Reagan's White House staff,
I don't recall a single news conference in which there were no follow-up questions, no challenges to anything the president
had said recently, no assertions of fact that the president was challenged to deal with. In fact, I don't remember Clinton,
either, ever getting a full 45-minute prime-time news conference pass.
 

Tony, you ignorant whore.

There's a difference between the way Clinton and Obama answer questions to the way Reagan and Bush the Moron did.
Reagan and Bush, because they were brainless sacks of shit, could only regurgitate canned answers, nothing more.
"It's the law of the land."
"I think the people can better decide what to do with their money than some bureaucrat in Washington."
"Government is the problem."
"They hate us for our freedoms."
"You're either with us or you're against us."
"Freedom is God's gift to everyone."

That's all pure horseshit and those non-answers DESERVE follow ups.
When Clinton or Obama answers a question, they f-ing answer it.
You have to give short, memorized answers when you don't have a brain.
 

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Quotes

"The Drive-Bys are all over the place talking about how wonderful Obama's presser was.
  It was a bomb! It was a bomb of a press conference! You could definitely tell the difference
  between Obama on a prompter and Obama impromptu."
     -- the vulgar Pigboy
 

 You're right, Rush.
 Obama often took a moment to think before speaking.
 That's something Bush never did because all his answers were canned, bumper-sticker handjobs.
 Bush always knew what his answers would be before the questions were asked.
 

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 Subject: tornados*

Dear Bart,  are you okay?  I heard there was a tornado in Oklahoma.  I know it's
a big state, but it still worries me to hear about disasters close to  friends' locations.

I wonder if I should pursue my critique of Ann Coulter's latest book, Guilty.
I still have the book on hold at the library, (Thanks for not buying it)  but when I checked last night on Amazon,
her book has fallen out of the top 100 best sellers on their list.  (I  trust the Amazon list for true sales.)  But I do not
want to do anything to promote her book.  I think, based on the relative tanking of her latest collection of lies, that her
days as a GOP icon are fading fast.  Matt Lauer skewered her on the Today Show and  Barbara Walters nearly
gave her a case of frostbite after Ann told  Barbara that she was reading portions of the book l like it was Mein Kampf.
Even Elisabeth Hasselback look mortified!!!

Anyway, hope everything is okay at Casa de Bart.
 Kat
 

Kat, we are fine.
Luckily I was too sick to worry about the tornados*

But remember the Republicans cheat when it comes to book sales.
You can go to Newsmax or Freeperville and find her books for one cent. Seriously.
That way, Coulter can claim, "I sold a million books."

Plus, the Right stand behind their writers. The Left does not.

Lyons, Franken and Conason would be multi-millionaires of they were Fascist dogs.
 

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U2 to do Full Week on Letterman

 Link - can't find one

U2 will play Letterman's show every night from March 2-6 to promote their new album.

You'd think something like that would make the Internets.
 

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 Subject: Thanks from an old friend

Hey Bart,  it's great to see you're still hammering away. Me and a lot of people who were glued to their monitors
the last 8 years  have given the world of politics a break for a while to deal with the real-life aftermath of ass-hat economics.
You're an inspirational reminder that, just because we swept the elections this time, the BFEE  is still there - still trying to
screw us - still praying we'll let our guard down for just a few moments.

I may not read you as much as I used to, but I won't let my subscription lapse.
It'd be a very dangerous fantasy to think we don't  need people like you, hammers at the ready.

Cheers,
-Rex Devious
 

Rex, that was nice - thanks.
 

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Fox Newser In Kiddie Porn Bust

 "I'm a GOP pervert!"

 Link

 Excerpt:
A Fox News producer who covered Hillary's presidential campaign for the Fascist cable network faces child porn charges
after feds discovered photos and videos on his computer depicting "children under the age of ten being sexually abused."
Aaron Bruns, 29, was apparently nabbed after an investigator conducting "pro-active undercover investigations" determined
that Bruns's computer contained llicit images. According to an arrest warrant, an FBI search of a laptop in Bruns's home
turned up several photos and videos showing the sexual abuse of children as young as five years old.

This is the second time Bruns has been arrested for possessing vile images. In July 1999, Bruns, then 19,
pleaded guilty in Michigan (where he was enrolled in college) to distributing child pornography over the Internet.
 

You want a good gambling tip?
When some scumbag is arrested on kiddie porn charges, bet that he's a Republican.
You can make tons of money betting on those Fascist dog perverts
Sure, you might lose 1-2 out of ten, but you'll always win the other 8-9 bets.
 

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Quotes

"Behind every economic catastrophe you will find a Republican president."
      -- Bartcop, and if you want to challenge me on that, bring your wallet
 

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 Subject: Get well

Food poisoning, oh man.  That sucks a big one. 
I hope feel better real soon! Sorry to hear about it.
 Joanne
 

I hope you live for 50 more years we need your input .
 Mike
 

Bart, that is miserable stuff.
Glad to hear you are feeling better.
I look forward to having you around for a long time, 'cause you know 
those evil republican bastards will never stop their war on the middle class!
 Ron in Arizona
 

You gotta watch those pizzas Bart, but there is a miserable flu- like cold going around. 
I've had it twice since October and have exhausted the US supply of antibiotics.
Rest!
 Mary in Wa
 

I’ve had my health issues and I know it’s nice when people care. 
I hate nausea so you have my profound sympathy.
Take it slow and easy and you’ll be back soon enough, 
fuck the page for how ever long it takes.
Your members, your good members will understand.
 Bill from ct
 

Sorry about the food poisoning.  Get well and Keep Hammering!
 Jack in Jacksonville, AL
 

And I was worried about the tornados hitting you! Hope you get on the mend soon. 
This can be horrid. I think this is how we are all going to die, poisoned by bad food 
or food products! You must be so miserable. Hang in there!
 Sue M
 

Yeah, and it's still not over.
It's been 88 hours and most of the pain is gone but I'm still not eating. 
I'm still weak, clammy and sweating and I'm ready for this to be over.

On the other hand I've lost 12 pounds :)
 

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Quotes

"Obama has relaxed the White House dress code. 
  Clinton, of course, established 'Pants-Free Friday.'"
    -- multi-millionaire David Letterman, with his 22 writers, 
        and the best he can do?  Eleven year old Monica jokes?
 

 That's sad.   If that was the best I could do, I'd retire.
 But as long as Leno's around, Dave's not the worst.
 

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The great Atlantic Ocean swimming hoax
 The Whore AP feeds us another set of lies

 Link

 Excerpt:
Over the weekend, an inspirational story appeared on Whore AP news wire. It detailed American Jennifer Figge
becoming the first woman to swim across the Atlantic Ocean. Many media outlets stupidly trusted the Whore AP
about this story that seemed almost too good to be true. That's because it was.

There were problems with the story from the start. Any idiot with a calculator could tell that swimming 2,100 miles
in 25 days is impossible.  Michael Phelps swimming his fastest would take 20 days to cover that distance.
And that's his fastest pace, sustained for three weeks, without ever stopping. Impossible.
 

The Whore AP never pays a price for lying and I think it's time they did.

They will run any story that they think will make them money.
They will slant any story that they think will make them money.

They've done this for over a decade and they're still considered a valid news source?
 

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 Subject: Get well soon

Dude... You give a whole new meaning to being 'snake bit' and that's a fact!
You have the worst luck of just about anyone I know.
It is almost humorous in a 'slap-stick/pratfall' sort a way, ya know?...

Almost, I said... I'm not laughing and I wish you well...
Have you ever considered that someone out there has a voodoo doll named Bart?
There's an explanation, fer ya!
Regards,
 BadtotheboneBob
 

Bob, I don't mean to sound like Lou Gehrig, but I'm actually the luckiest guy I know.
I've been with Mrs. Bart for 37 years and that's really all that counts.
The bad stuff started piling up only recently - most of it is temporary.

Lots of people have it tons worse than me.
The food poisoning is going away,
I have an appoinment with the hand surgeon Monday and one of these days
we'll get thru the financial crisis that this adoption has caused.

I wouldn't trade places with anybody.
 

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Eight arrested in Michael Phelps case
Meanwhile Bush, who broke the world, remains at large

 Link

 Excerpt:
We've now learned that since investigators began trying to build a case, they've made eight arrests: seven for drug
possession and one for distribution. These are arrests that resulted as the sheriff's department served search warrants.

We've also learned that the department has located and confiscated that bong. Sources say the owner of the bong
was trying to sell it on eBay for as much as $100,000. The owner, who wasn't even at the party, is one of the eight now charged.
 

First, we have no idea of this is typical shit-reporting or if it's accurate.
For instance:
How do you arrest somebody for possession from a photo of another guy hitting a bong?
How can you arrest anybody without knowing what was in the bong in the photo?
   Even if Phelps was seen smoking a "hand rolled cigarette" that's not proof it was pot.
Here's where GOP, law-and-order handjobs say, "Oh come one Bart, what else would he be smoking?"
   But in a nation of laws, we don't make arrests on what Ol' Bart's best guess is.
 

Whore AP: Phelps admits smoking pot
That's an outright lie, but what else do we expect from the Whore AP?

 Link

 Excerpt:
In a statement released to the Whore AP, Phelps admits that the picture is real.

"I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgement. I'm 23 years old and despite
the successes I've had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner people have come
to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my fans and the public it will not happen again," said Phelps.
 

That's light f-ing years from admitting to smoking pot.
If Phelps had been photographed in blackface playing a banjo, that stament would read the same.

"I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgement. I'm 23 years old and despite
the successes I've had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner people have come
to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my fans and the public it will not happen again," said Phelps.

Is it against the law to be seen in blackface?
Would the idiot cops have arrested those eight for witnessing boarish behavior?

We have to realize that we live in a nation where the press is a slimy, dirty-legged whore.
They have NO REGARD for the facts, it's all about what will sell more papers and commercials.

Last I heard, America was ranked about 47th on Freedom of the Press.
I'll bet we're not in the top sixty today.
 

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Search Now:

 Subject: Why Plant Killed the Reunion

Hey Bart,

Maybe Plant got a chance to go see The Police on their reunion tour.
I did, and it was apparent that the band wasn't jelling at all.  It seemed as though they lost their chemistry,
and if you think about it, Sting's solo work was a real diversion from The Police...so one could expect that,
getting together to play a tour might actually be difficult.  It was fun to see them, but it wasn't the same.
Missed notes, forgotten words...and a that's a lot of songs to remember.

My guess is, he just doesn't want to look bad...and he's not into the music anymore.
That, or perhaps JPJ and Paige are in control, and he's being a diva.
He is a lead singer, after all...aren't they all trying to be the center of attention?
 Tom
 

At this point, I couldn't care any less about Plant, I just want to see God play his guitar.
If Plant's too old to remember the damn words, let him tour with a teleprompter
like Sinatra did when he was too old to remember anything.

Of course Sinatra was in his eighties then, but Plant's a feeble old man at 61?
And why does he remember the words just fine when singing with Alison Krauss?
 

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Please sign up for whatever you can afford.
(10% of your gross is the usual tithe.)

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 OR send a 'love' check to

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Option: If you want to donate on a regular basis
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 Subject: Robert Plant, bowing out of Zeppelin tour

Bart,  love your site.

I think Plant’s being honest about making a reasonable call.
The band members still alive are in their 60s.
Plant’s voice isn’t what it used to be.
Their drummer – arguably one of the best ever – is gone.
If I were in his shoes, I’d be nervous about measuring up to what the band used to be.
Maybe better to stay focused on what he’s doing now.

Even if Bonham had lived, I don’t think there was any going back.
Zeppelin had already become something different.

And I suspect that’s why he doesn’t want to do another tour.
Most everyone will expect to see what they saw  in ’69 or ’75.

And that’s not what they’ll get.  That’s what I heard him saying.
Regards,
 John O
 

But besides the giant chasm of musical talent,
how is Zeppelin different from The Who, The Stones, Floyd, The Police etc?

Zeppelin is probably bigger then they ever were.
Tour financiers say a new Zep tour would be "the biggest tour in music history," so why
deprive millions of people who weren't even born in 1980, a chance to see them?

You can probably tell that I'm hurt because I'm so into Zeppelin for decades, 
and I'd accept any honest-sounding answer from Plant but so far he hasn't given one.

If those songs are "too sacred to ruin," why play them with unknowns?
 

DVD of Led Zeppelin's last show.

 If you're a subscriber, I can get you a copy for $37.

(You don't have to subscribe for a full year)

 Soon, Jimmy's lawyer will write and make me take this down.
 

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 Subject: Ben & Jerry's ice cream

Ben & Jerry created "Yes Pecan!" ice cream flavor for Obama.

For George W. they asked for suggestions from the public.

Here are some of their favorite responses:

* Grape Depression
* The Housing Crunch
* Abu Grape
* Cluster Fudge
* Nut'n Accomplished
* Good Riddance You Lousy Motherfucker ... Swirl   ha ha I'll have two scoops of that!
* Iraqi Road
* Impeach Cobbler
* imPeachmint
* Death by Chocolate... and Torture
* Credit Crunch
* Country Pumpkin
* Chunky Monkey in Chief
* WMDelicious
* Chocolate Chimp
* Bloody Sundae
* I broke the law and am responsible for the deaths of thousands . . . with nuts

sas
sendatee.net
 
 

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 Subject: the party of Alan Colmes

Hello Bart,
I've been reading you on and off for years.

I'm sick of the Dems being the party of Alan Colmes.
How about we take a page from Charles Atlas and switch from the 96 pound weakling to the muscle man?

Obama needs to take the lead on this and stop letting Boehner & McConnell keep kicking sand in his face.
Keep on swinging the hammer.
 Tom in Madison
 
 

Tom, "the Party of Alan Colmes?"  that's a perfect description of our weenie Dems.

The problem is Obama has billed himself as the guy who wants to get along with the Facsist dogs.
No telling how long that will last, but as long as he's standing there sheepishly with his hat in hand
we should expect the vicious dogs to tear him to pieces.  Rabid dogs aren't nice, even if you're nice to them.

That's why I was originally for Hillary the vicious pit bull.
 

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Quotes

"My choice early in life was either to be a piano player in a whorehouse or a politician.
  I, for one, believe the piano player to be much more honorable than most current politicians.'
     -- Harry Truman
 

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Worldwide Bartcop

They read it in Tashkent, Uzbekistan 

They read it in Bend, Oregon  (Hi, Bernie!)

They read it in Adapazari , Turkey

They read it in Slidell , Louisiana

They read it in Yaounde, Cameroon

  Want to sell stuff everywhere?

They have money - their economy wasn't ruined by a religiously-insane moron.

 Why sell to America when you can sell to the world?
 

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Subject: Donation

Bart, the Repubs have no shame!
They are D-heads!
 Pauline in Hayward
 

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Catherine Bell is 'The Good Witch' 

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BCR Show #148

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...
Marty says:
Shirley Manson on Craig Ferguson TONIGHT

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