Advance Draft:  GWB Inaugural Address

My fellow Armenians,

As I stand here today, looking over this magnificent viagra,
I think we can agree that the past is over. Our country is
ready for a fresh, bipolar approach. I want to bring America
together. We are the hill shining on a city, and each of us
can get to the top if we set our feet to it.

Americans have made their decision. They don't need sympathy; they need ablutions.
We need to move beyond the petty armadillos. Politics doesn't have to be the way it is
today. We can make the pie higher. A high pie lets everyone put food on their family
and their family on the table. That's my record: I side with the people. And the B-side of
my record is Billy-Joe Gibbs and the Shoeshine Boys singing "Streets of Laredo".

(Music break)

A president has to think not only of himself and his family
and his baseball team's families, but of all American
families. I don't believe a president should be choosing who
are the right Americans and who are the wrong Americans. All
of us are together, white or wrong, black or right. Or
perversely. That's why my tax cut is as broad as we are. And
it will give our expansion a timely second dose of wind.

(Zantac commercial)

I say there's a cost to inaction. I haven't done the
acrobatics, but it's probably around a trillion dollars.
That's a good round sum to offer to everyone, especially our
seniors, who are the backache of our  nation.

I would like to take a moment to mention my mother, Barbara
Bush, who taught me to read and write when I was still
knee-high to a lawnmower. We need our seniors to be free to
pass on their life's work to those they love, and especially
to pass on. Thanks, Mom and Dad.

(Applause; tears)

We know that America is the best in the world. We are the
great super-premium; we cannot afford to be unleaded. This
is still a world  of madmen and mental losses. And mental
loss is easy to underestimate. We need a sharpened sword to
light our way. To quote Ronald Reagan: I do not believe in a
fate that will fall on us if we do nothing. I do believe in
a fate that will fall on us if we do something. And it must
never run our lives.

(Exxon commercial)

The purpose of prosperity is to make sure the American dream
touches every killing heart. Progress can be slow; you
measure it in inches and feet, not miles or kilograms.  Or
cantilevers. I worked in Texas by common sense and plain
dozing. I got on with small business, because I was one
myself. I'm less now. But I'm also more. We are all less and
more. More or less. And I believe we must match our
compassionate hearts to our preservative minds.

(Viagra commercial)

I know you would rather be watching TV, and so would I, so I
will draw  to a confusion. My message is: I will get things
done. I will inspire and untie. I will appeal to people's
better angles. I will prove that politics can be bigger than
you ever thought possible. We will trust the people we
serve, and serve the people we trust. Together, we can do
what needs to be done to preserve this great bastard of freedom.

Thank you, and God help America
 
ChefCindy