|
Thurs-Friday, April 5-6, 2012 Vol 2855 - Less than dick
Business slow? Run a "We're Still Here" Sale! Think how many people/companies have left us since Bush stole the Treasury. Banner ads by the day, by the week, or by the monff Click Here to get more Hits Even if business is slow, remind them why they need you! Two day ads just $35 Quotes
"UK's Sky News says it let its journalists hack two e-mail accounts because it was "in the public interest." -- CNN Breaking News So, your hacked stories didn't make a profit for Rupert Murdoch's Sky News, you released the story commercial-free because it was in the public's interest? Bart's Law #2 Any time a person or entity makes a "mistake" that puts extra money (or power) in their pocket, expect them to make that "mistake" again and again and again. Plus, if they admitted two hacks, assume there's twenty more they hope we don't find out about Send e-mail to Bart Cops have a license to rape
Strip-searches legal all the time, in every case by Ted Rall Link The text of Justice Kennedy’s majority is cold and bureaucratic. “Every detainee who will be admitted to the general population may be required to undergo a close visual inspection while undressed,” he writes for the five right-wingers in the majority of the Supreme Court. There’s no looking back now. The United States is officially a police state. The case arose from the arrest of Albert Florence in New Jersey in 2005. Mr. Florence was in the passenger seat of his BMW when a state trooper pulled his wife, April, over for speeding. A records search revealed an outstanding warrant for Mr. Florence’s arrest based on an unpaid fine. (The info was wrong; the fine had been paid.) Mr. Florence was held for a week in jails in Burlington and Essex Counties, and he was strip-searched in each. There is some dispute about the details, but general agreement that he was made to stand naked in front of a guard who required him to move intimate parts of his body. The guards did not touch him.” When Hannity said, "Waterboarding is not torture," he was offered a chance to prove that by being waterboarded by a Democrat - but the pussy refused because he knew it was torture. Similarly, next time Jutice Kennedy is being driven to work in his limo, oversized goons should pull him over and drag him in handcuffs to some stark white building, then strip him of his clothes and then tell him to "Lift your sack" to strangers could search his taint. He wouldn't like that. He would consider that "unreasonable search ansd seizure." So why do the rest of us have to be subjected to this humiliation? Send e-mail to Bart Shop Online
Amazon.com sells everything I get my green tea from them because they sell it in bulk and I drink lots of it.
Someone bought a Mission Style Folding Chair $49 (cheap) with FREE shipping Amazon donated $2.00 to the Treehouse I think everyone should have a mission chair. Thanks for using this link
Buy
online Look for 'bartcop' in the
link when you place the order.
Add
the Amazon link
to your Favorites Bar
bin Laden's Debt to Bush by Robert Parry Link Recent disclosures about Osama bin Laden’s life after he slipped through George W. Bush’s fingers in the aftermath of the 9/11 attacks put into a more personal light why the terrorist leader so appreciated Bush’s decision to divert U.S. military attention to Iraq: Bin Laden spent his last nine years living with his three wives and fathering four more children. Bin Laden especially got to enjoy the pleasures of his youngest wife who was in her 20s — and who bore him the four children — as the fugitive family skipped across Pakistan from safe house to safe house before settling down at a compound in Abbottabad. Bin Laden was finally tracked down there and killed in May 2011 on President Barack Obama’s orders. What do you get the
super-rich fratboy who already has everything? You give him
this:
This allowed Der Monkey Fuhrer to become Emperor of America, where his every whim became law. The Democrats wet themselves in fear, leaving the Bush jackals to run roughshod over the entire planet and nobody did a goodamn thing to stop them. The result was 6,000 dead soldiers, $15 trillion in debt and trillions more stolen from American familes. America became Torture Nation, just so Bush would have something visual to masturbate to. But hey, as long as Emperor Bush was made happy, that's all that counts. "Wait, you're saying WE should have done something?" Marty
has
new stuff every
day
on her fine, fine Entertainment Page Marty's TV Listings are the best! Marty always has good stuff. This is what they
mean...
Sarah Palin Nude Link Subject: killing Medicare and Social Security Bart, Under W. the Reps tried to "privatize" Social Security, and they are similarly trying to privatize Medicare (see the Ryan "budget"). You might wonder why; the total amount of money is not large by Wall Street standards. The Supreme Court debate on Obamacare gives us a clue. If Social Security and Medicare are privatized, the government will be creating a mandate on how people spend their money (how much needs to be invested, how much needs to be put towards retirement, etc.), and given control of the collection process to a private industry. In front of the Supreme Court, GOP attorneys are claiming Obamacare is unconstitutional because it is a government mandate on how people spend their money, with the collection process delegated to a private industry. So they believe that, if they can get these programs privatized, they can completely eliminate them! That's been a goal of the far right since 1935 (for Social Security) and 1965 (for Medicare). Russ Pigboy Spoofed in Viagra Ad Link Send e-mail to Bart Subject: My Brush with Greatness Link We need more Greatness stories Check out the news and toons at
Read all about it! on the Bart Blog! The Future is Officially Here Google unveils web on your glasses "Look, I'm watching porn!" Link Google Inc is getting into the eyewear business with a pair of thin wraparound shades that puts the company's Web services in your face. The experimental "augmented reality" glasses - from the same team that is developing self-driven cars - can snap photos, initiate videochats and display directions at the sound of a user's voice. The prototype digital glasses, unveiled on the company's Google+ social network on Wednesday, are still being tweaked and tested, and are not available in stores yet. "We're sharing this information now because we want to start a conversation and learn from your valuable input," Google wrote in a post on a Google+ page devoted to Project Glass. The spectacles are being developed by Google, the secretive group working on advanced research projects such as self-driving cars. Send e-mail to Bart Premier Toonist
Wolf Grulkey
is running for
congress
Subject: Thanks Bart, I love your web site - it brings me JOY. I found out about you from listening to Mike Malloy. Keep up the great work and I always tell people about your site. I hope you receive more donations in the months to come. Jean Jean, that was nice - thanks, Send e-mail to Bart Assange's 75 press complaints
Only 75? He must be feeling generous Link WikiLeaks chief Julian Assange has made 75 official complaints over what he describes as the shoddy reporting of his long-running extradition battle, the online activist said Thursday. Assange itemized the complaints in a submission to Britain's judge-led inquiry into media ethics, which is examining the standards and practices of the country's scandal-tarred press. He said in a statement published by the inquiry Thursday that he had been subjected to "ongoing, widespread inaccurate and negative media coverage" and that Britain's whore press failed to protect him. Assange has had a tumultuous relationship with many in the mainstream media, particularly The New York Whore Times and Britain's Guardian newspaper, to which he leaked a mass of confidential U.S. secret documents before releasing them online. He's accused many journalists of lazy, inaccurate reporting and of being complicit with authority figures. Unflattering profiles in the media have in turn depicted the former computer hacker as imperious and arrogant. Arrogant? Do you think Julian Assange is more arrogant than Sean Hannity? Do you think Julian Assange is more arrogant than Brian Williams? Do you think Julian Assange is more arrogant than Wolf the Douche? Do you think Julian Assange is more arrogant than David Gregory? Do you think Julian Assange is more arrogant than Piggy Noonan? Do you think Julian Assange is more arrogant than Pat Buchanan? Do you think Julian Assange is more arrogant than Billo Reilly? Do you think Julian Assange is more arrogant than the vulgar Pigboy? (this list is endless...) If arrogance is a crime, most of the people on that list deserve life in prison. . Send e-mail to Bart We're
on Twitter and Facebook
If you follow 'Bartcop' on Twitter/Facebook
you'll know when each new issue goes up. Quotes "The eighties are a tough era for today's voices to sing." -- Steven Tyler, making absolutely no sense on American Idol Send e-mail to Bart Can you guess the movie? Link Send e-mail to Bart This poor bastard is a Republican (void of sanity.) The White man can't make it in America these days, because "they" gave "everything" to "those people." Plus, he'll testify, under oath, that Trayvon was ghetto hoodlum trash, so it's OK with him if Trayvon was murdered for walking while Black in Florida. Whitney Houston Report Breaking CNN News Whitney Houston was found by an assistant "lying face down in the bathtub filled with water," according to the full autopsy report released Wednesday. The coroner ruled that Houston's death February 11 was an accidental drowning with the "effects of atherosclerotic heart disease and cocaine use" as contributing factors. The report blamed cocaine and other drugs in her body at the time of her death. How do you drown face down in a bathtub? I can see her groggily sliding into the water face-up, but not face down. Send e-mail to Bart Today's Mystery Car
Link Subject: last issue's Mystery Car Link Bart, that's a... Last issue's Mystery Car was not indentified. Send e-mail to Bart The GOP's War on people We're fighting the anti-progress GOP - can you help? You could PayPal something to bartcop@bartcop.com Click to Subscribe or Donate
..
or you could send a "love" check tobartcop.com PO Box 54466 Tulsa, OK 74155 We accept credit cards Thank you I Was Born in March/September Bart Thanks, they send me pennies... Today's Mystery Celebrity Link Subject: last issue's Mystery Celebrity Link Bart, that's Melissa Theriau, the gorgeous French News anchor. How does one say “yum” in French? GKR I'm pretty sure that's "le yum." Send e-mail to Bart The idiots who run TV... It seems they have killed two shows that were once fun to watch. Fairly Legal had a strong freshman year, but now they've killed it. Sarah Shahi i easy on the eyes and she even plays an intelligent character. But they decided to make her court opponent/boyfriend (that viewers liked) a cheater so she dumped him and he's no longer on the show. In his place, they have Ryan Johnson, an Aussie who plays a real obnoxious dick who Kate will no doubt fall into bed with and we hate him. Why do shows do this? They put people on TV who's only saving grace is that it feels so goddamn good when they finally get the hell off your TV. Remember on Friends, when the viewers wanted Ross & Rachel to get back together but then that idiot Ross went and married that super-snobbish English toad Emily? That's what Fairly Legal has done and damage has been done. They had a highly-rated, money-making TV show with good buzz - so they fixed it. Plus, Bones has turned into a Babyfest and I hate Babyfests. It was never the best show on TV, but we got to liking the characters, but then Bones got pregnant, had the screaming kid and now the show is impossible to watch. You know Bones will be dragging that crying baby into every sewer where they find a body. I can't stand that unfunny crap that passes for baby humor. Morning sickness and crying babies and puke jokes and poop jokes - it's like this once-good show turned into a Ben Stiller movie. (Not a compliment) Sidebar: Recently, Jon Stewart was on Letterman. In times past, two comedy legends getting together was always good for a few laughs, but now that they both have small boys, what do they talk about? Baby talk and diaper talk and poop talk - then more baby talk and more poop talk. It just makes me want to f-ing hurl. Babies kill comedy shows and babies kill cop shows. They've killed two good, money-making shows in a recession - why? Send e-mail to Bart Subject: My Brush with Greatness Link We need more Greatness stories Link Subject: last issue's mystery city Bart, Last Issue's Mystery City is the one and only Nashville, Tennessee. The tallest building with twin spires is the AT&T building, fondly known as the "Bat Building." Right across the street from it, but hidden, is the famous Ryman Auditorium, former home of the Grand Ole Opry. The view is from the Cumberland River which flows past the downtown area. Dirt Send e-mail to Bart Let's
bully Lindsay Lohan
She fighting back from years in hell, so let's kick the bitch while she's down. This pointless ambush seems really creepy but we don't know, really, because they haven't applied this creepy technology on anyone else Obama might look just as creepy... Today's History Mystery Link Subject: last issue's history mystery Bart, Last Issue's History Mystery ? That is "Sing along with Mitch Miller" Yes I am that old. He was on our black and white TV on Friday evenings back in the late 50"s. He was always surrounded by beautiful women on his show. He lived to the ripe old age of 99 years. Roger in South Dakota the land of Stone Faces Send e-mail to Bart Subject: donation You know, if some rich Democrat could throw $30,000-$60,000 my way it would sure take the pressure off for the upcoming political season. Think of the tax deduction! I hate to spend time every day trying to raise money. If you're shopping online, it never hurts to check http://amzn.to/bartcop prices. Boston native Eliza Dushku Check out over 100 sexy and tastefull photos of Eliza Dushku in BC Hotties Thanks to Blue in Seattle for helping me corral the hotties. Marty always has good stuff. Shopping online?
Use this
Amazon
portal http://amzn.to/bartcop
Read
the Previous Issue
of
bartcop.com
It had everything. Copyright
© 1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002,
2003,
Thanks to bartcop.com subscribers. We
know you work
hard for your money, so we take it as
a compliment when you throw some our way each month.
Click
Here to see if reality
Marc Perkel's ChurchIf
it's
Real - we believe
in it!
To hear the
RADIO
SHOWS, you must
have a
login
and password. Click to get to the Archived Radio Shows bartcop.com and BartCop are trademarks of attempts at humor
|