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Thurs-Friday June 20-21, 2013 Vol 3081 - Walking the Plank

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...


	Cyber War Beats Real War
	The GOP's Masturbating Fetus
	The Cruel and Unusual Slappy
	Howard Kurtz Moves to FOX
	James Gandolfini Dead at 51
	Amazon Helps Tequila Treehouse
	Woman on Top - Angelina Jolie

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Quotes

"We need to slash food stamps so the super-rich can have even more tax nreaks."
-- Every Republican in the House

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Cyber Warfare Beats The Other Kind
by Gene Lyons

Link

Here’s the thing: The good news is that the most dramatic “revelations” in the Snowden-Greenwald
stories turn out upon further review to be somewhere between greatly exaggerated and entirely false.

Yes, NSA vacuums up telephone “metadata” and sifts it for suspicious patterns.
USA Today revealed that in 2006.

There was a big political fight about it, which the libertarian side lost. But no, they aren’t listening to
your calls, and when the histrionic Mr. Snowden says he could have eavesdropped on anybody in the USA,
he leaves out that doing so would have landed him in federal prison, where he probably belongs.

There you go - who makes more sense than Gene Lyons?

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The GOP's Masturbating Fetus
No, I am not making this up - they did it again

Link

Meet Rep. Michael Burgess (R-Texas), who believes that abortion should be banned earlier than
the Supreme Court says it should because, in part, he knows fetuses feel pain. He knows this because
he says he's seen male fetuses begin masturbating in the womb around 15 weeks into a pregnancy.

During a House Rules Committee debate on Monday, Burgess unleashed the following (video below):

"This is a subject I know something about ... Watch a sonogram of a 15-week baby, and they have
movements that are purposeful. They stroke their face. If they’re a male baby, they may have their
hand between their legs. If they feel pleasure, why is it so hard to believe that they could feel pain?"

Remember, this is a subject he knows something about. How can we be sure?

He has practiced as an OB/GYN for 25 years — 25 years of tiny masturbating fetuses. ha ha

They just can't help themselves.

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The Cruel and Unusual Slappy
Our stupidest judge is also the meanest

Link

The cruelties of the self-loathing, self-pitying Clarence Thomas were on display again this week when
he provided the deciding vote that had the Supreme Court managing to turn the right to remain silent
against the accused, and using that silence as evidence of incrimination.

Thomas will never miss a chance to stick it to defendants. This is the justice who has no problem executing
the mentally ill: he was among the three dissenters voting for such executions in Atkins v. Virginia in 2002.

This is the justice who decided that prison guards at Louisiana’s Angola state prison, kicking an inmate while
he’s handcuffed and shackled, punching him in the mouth, eyes, chest and stomach while another guard held
him in place, did not amount to cruel and unusual punishment under the Eighth Amendment. He was in a 7-2
minority on that one, joined only by Antonin Scalia, whose wood never travels far from Inquisition-vintage
punishments. When the case was argued, even President George H.W. Bush and his deputy solicitor general
at the time, John Roberts, now the chief justice, were on the inmate’s side. Not Thomas. Never Thomas.

Perhaps Slappy greatest crime was, after making it due to Affirmative Action,
once HE made it thru the door, he slammed it shut for those behind him.

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Subject: I found some nudity in your hotties section

JG, thanks for that.
Obviously that wasn't suppose to be there.

I usually get these hottie pictures hundreds at a time and that fake slipped thru.
I have sent you a $10 reward because I cannot afford to be associated with ANY nudity.

If you, the reader, find ANY could-possibly-be-perceived-as-nudity photos on bartcop,com
you will be rewarded with $10 PER PHOTO that you find, assuming I agree and take it down.

I can't be in the same room as nudity.
I can't even know that nudity exists.

<Bart does a shot>

I'm so old, I remember when my subscribers were my boss.
From 1996-2008, I could publish any goddamn thing I wanted.

Then Bush ruined the world's economy, millions of families went broke
and now I find myself with a lesser-paying job, working more hours for The Man.

But seriously, $10 reward PER PHOTO that I take down.

I could use that extra cash, Bart

Hollywood Creativity

Link

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Quotes

"Yes, of course - probably when a black man burst into the bank
that I was working at and put a gun to my head."
-- TV's Southern Chef Paula Dean, when asked if she's ever used the N-word. Link

"Absolutely not!"
-- Paula Dean, when asked if she used the N-word to the bank robber's face

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Marty's Entertainment Page
has new stuff every day

Marty's TV Listings are the best!

Tonite on TCM

Marty always has good stuff.

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Howard Kurtz Moves to FOX News
It's a better fit for the right-wing handjob

Link

Howard Kurtz is leaving CNN and joining Fox News.

Kurtz, who hosted CNN’s Reliable Sources, will anchor a weekend media program for Fox News.
Kurtz starts his new gig at Fox News on July 1.

The surprise move marks the start of the next phase in the career of one of Washington’s long-running
and best-known right-wingers who was once well regarded but whose star has dimmed as the errors piled up.
Kurtz’s run has been plagued at times by a handful of whopping mistakes, including most recently inaccurately
claiming that an NBA player who came out as gay had failed to reveal he had once been engaged.

Kurtz will anchor a version of the media show that is now called “Fox News Watch,”
which will get a new format during the weekends.

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Subject: Jesus. Worse than Obama.

What if you treated Jesus like you treat Obama?
Guilt by association, accusation, innuendo, or just because you want it to be true?

Jesus was a pedophile! Here’s proof! Matthew 18:14

Jesus was gay! Here’s proof! Mark 10:21

Jesus paled around with terrorists! Here’s proof! Luke 6:15

Jesus was a socialist. Matthew 19:21 The first church was communist. Acts 4:32
Scott D

I'm confused again.
Besides my IQ of 64, I also deal in maybe 80 topics per page
so I have no idea what charge you're making.

On the NSA thing, I'm one of the very few backing Obama.

Yeah, he's crazy on pot and poker and he dithered while 90K died in Syria so I admit
I have my differences with him, but I don't want him weakened or destroyed because
the next GOP president could make Bush/Cheney seem sane by comparison.

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Today's OMG! Don't Look Down Picture

Link

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James Gandolfini Dead at 51

Link

Terrible news for TV fans: James Gandolfini, who played Tony Soprano on "The Sopranos,"
died suddenly yesterday at the age of 51, Variety is reporting.

Gandolfini was traveling in Italy on vacation when he fell ill;
reports have him suffering a heart attack.

Damn, we lost one of the greats.

He was doing a COP SHOW for HBO, to change his "mob" screen image.
I believe they had only shot the pilot - hope we get to see that.

I heard that Gandolfini changed the whole makeup of The Sopranos.
Big boss David Chase wanted a not-so-dark show, but Gandolfini had other ideas.

I heard in the Sopranos pilot, Christopher told Tony he wanted to go to Hollywood and make movies
and Chase told "Tony" to slap Christopher's face. Gandolfini told Chase, "I don't think a mob boss
would act that way," so Chase said, "Show me what you mean."

So Christopher says, "I want to go to Hollywood" and Galdolfini picked him up off the ground
turned around and slammed him against the wall and said, "You'll go to fucking Hollywood if
and when I say you can go to fucking Hollywood, understand?" and Chase was impressed.

We might've had a whole 'nother show without that spoke-his-mind moment.

And who could forget that loser-dies fight with little Joey Pants? Fight starts at 3:45 NOT SFW

A shot of Chinaco for an acting legend.

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Beautiful Nature Picture

Baggers Boo Marco Rubio
"Shining star" mocked and jeered

Link

Erin Konkel traveled from Houston, Texas, to go to a daylong tea party rally on immigration reform
Wednesday in front of the Capitol, where she held up a handmade sign for more than an hour.
"RUBIO CONSERVATIVE RINO," it read, or Republican In Name Only.

She used to be a fan of Sen. Marco Rubio (R-Fla.), but now Rubio seemed to be going against
the views of those who voted him into office, she said.

"I believed in him," she said of Rubio. "I thought he was the real deal, but I was wrong."

When Robert Rector, a senior research fellow at the conservative Heritage Foundation,
took to the stage with Rep. Steve King (R-Iowa) to decry the gang of eight bill,
the crowd booed loudly for Rubio in particular.

"No matter what Marco Rubio says -- who has not read his own bill, incidentally," Rector said,

There was a palpable anger toward Rubio among some at a nearby rally,
which was on the other side of the Capitol with many of the same attendees.

They got nothing for 2016.

BTW, they think they can control America with Boner's little Hastert Rule.

Well guess what, guys, if WE keeping winning the White House WE will be appointing
the judges to the Supreme Court so go ahead and be a right-wing crazy as you want.

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Today's Mystery Celebrity Photo

Link

Subject: last issue's Mystery Celebrity Link

Bart, I believe that's Tim Roth.
William C

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Today's Mystery City

Link

Subject: last issue's Mystery City Link

Bart, that's St. Louis, MO with the Edward Jones Dome over on the right side of the photo.
Jer

Did you know 98% of all "St Louis" photos have the arch in the center?

Send e-mail to Bart

Name the Mystery Car

Link

Subject: last issue's Mystery Car Link

Bart, that is a one off concept car, the 1960 Plymouth XNR, built as a speculative car
Plymouth's entry into the sport's car category. It was originally purchased by the Shah of Iran.

I don't normally care much for Jay Leno, but he is good when talking old cars.
michaelgy

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What is today's History Mystery?

Link

Subject: last issue's History Mystery Link

Bart, that s a picture of the face of the Statue of Liberty being unpacked on June 17, 1885.
Tom C

Yes, but isn't it amazing how much it looks like Elvis?

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Subject: donations

Hey, Bart, it's been over a year since I tossed you some money.
For the love of God, don't send anything, I already have it all from last year.
This is just to make sure you know that - even though you're wrong on the NSA thing (ha) - I still love you.
Michael in Indiana

Michael, thanks for that.

Humor can get us thru the worst of times so we will keep on.
As my buddy Ray Coleman used to say, "Never quit!!"

Amazon.com seems to be my best bet to stay on the Tubes
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Woman on Top - Angelina Jolie

Check out over 1,200 sexy and tasteful photos of Angelina Jolie

Do me a favor if you peruse the hotties - if you see the slightest hint of nudity - any hint at all - tell me.

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