Barbara Streisand has sent a sizzling three-page memo to the fake Democrats,
accusing them of being "paralyzed, demoralized and depressed" since the election.

"We have a President who stole the presidency through family ties, arrogance and intimidation,
employing Republican operatives to exercise the tactics of voter fraud by disenfranchising
thousands of blacks, elderly Jews and other minorities."

"I hope you're through arguing among yourselves and distancing yourselves from President Clinton,"
Let's not let them divert attention from the success of his administration over the past eight years.
Let's not allow the Republicans to take away the gains we've made."

Streisand gives the clueless, fake Democrats a blueprint:

"We should have one goal, and that's to win back the House, Senate and Presidency.
Unless we win, we'll be consistently on the defensive with our fingers holding
the dike against the Republican revolution...
"You don't have to be ruthless like the Republicans, just be strong."

On the smirking moron:

"Look at his ratings — how could such a destructive man be so popular with the American people?
Not only is he poisoning our air and water by withdrawing his promise to enforce emissions
standards and arsenic regulations, but he's poisoning our political system as well.
Bipartisanship only works if you can trust the other side. As we have learned in the past
weeks, we cannot trust George W. Bush."

 Clinton's pardons:

"Talk about Republican pardons. George Bush protected himself by pardoning those
linked to him in the Iran-Contra scandal. He pardoned a heroin drug trafficker and a
terrorist who was responsible for 73 deaths. Clinton's pardons have no impact
on the health and welfare of the American people."

 She slaps the fake Democrats and demands they stand up and act like men.

"Why be afraid to speak out and remind the public of what happened last November?
Maybe it's because some of you are up for reelection and, therefore, might be afraid to rock the boat."
"Well, I disagree. Rocking the boat is what wins elections!"

 Is there anything that could wake up the pink tutu Democrats?
 If they don't want to fight for what's right, why the hell do they want to be re-elected?
 
 Come back, Bill Clinton.
 Come back...