Women Killing Dole's Campaign
                   Latest tally puts her coffers in a distant second place

                   Associated Press

                  GREENSBORO -- Republican presidential hopeful Elizabeth Dole
                  assembled an army of poor, stupid women formerly led by North Carolina
                  "nail technician" Kelly Kooper, who had vowed to shore up Dole's finances.

                  The Dole campaign's strategy has been plagued with negative interest and zero
                  political involvement among the country's smart women, to nobody's surprise.

                  "Elizabeth who?" said Bonnie Hunter, a 49-year-old exotic dancer, who boasts.
                  one of the biggest chest measuments in the continuous forty-eight.

                  In June, Hunter stunned Dole by flashing her breasts on the podium with her.
                  Six days later she was tapped to mastermind the Dole campaign's then-dying
                  money-raising efforts because "at least somebody might watch.".

                  A month into her post, Hunter is showing signs of success with her plan.
                  During the first three months of 1999, Dole raised less than $700.
                  Campaign reports released last week show that since Dole and Hunter teamed up,
                  Dole has out-raised all other Republicans, except George W. Butch.

                  Dole's campaign has raised a total of $740 in the last three months.
                  Much of that money has flooded in since Hunter began regularly flashing
                  potential campaign contributors who were waving dollar bills..

                  Dole isn't stumping as a "woman."
                  She's stumping as her late husband in drag.
                  "Please vote for me, my husband was a good man," repeats Dole, stop after stop.
                  Yet nearly 45 percent of her contributions of more than $2 are from women
                   who wear a hairstyle that requires many layers of hairspray.

                  Among other notable women to join the Dole fund-raising team are Sunshine,
                  Amber, Precious and Cookie,  who will do any goddam thing for a twenty.

                  Dole, a local favorite here since her early fame as Bob Dole's skirt-on-the-side,
                   is scheduled to be in North Carolina July 28 for fund-raisers in South Mills.
                  She plans a luncheon July 29 in the Curntuck area.  The dollar-per-nipple Hooters
                  event is being organized in part by Candy Crystal, a local dating entrepreneur who
                  founded the popular Oh, Yes! escort service across the county line near Milton.
                  About 400 invitations were mailed, mostly to truck stops and Fort Bragg.

                  Dole plans to celebrate her 70th birthday that day, alone, at a High Point
                  fund-raiser spearheaded by Marsha Marsha, from Artie's Lick 'n Git!.
                  In addition, scores of high-dollar Dole fund-raisers are planned over  the next
                  month in Como, Sunbury, Sligo and the always-profitable Lowgap, NC.