Every word on  bartcop.com  is true.
If it wasn't, I couldn't print it.
There are laws against that kind of stuff.

Also, the pictures are all true.
They may be hidden, but they're still there

The naked picture of Dr. Laura with her legs spread  is true, too.

She called me and offered me oral sex if I'd take those pictures down.
I told her no.

She promised she'd perform the "dutch oven" on me.
I told her no.

Then she promised to give me "the three-eyed turtle,"
so I told her, "Sorry, She-Thing. I don't have sex outside of marriage."

She promised to sue me and I told her to fucking come get me.
She doesn't know who she's dealing with.
When we get to court, I'll produce the picture without Smirk blocking the view of the
South entrance to the Grand Canyon and ask the jury which of us has more credibility.

ha ha

C'mon, Laura, take your best shot!
I promise I won't use any lawyers, either.
I'll represent myself, and I'll do it while while drinking fine tequila.
Loser pays expenses, right?

ha ha
 

More Legal Claimers:
The boys in legal say I have to do this...

Every word I've said about Rush and Clarence and the gerbils is true.
The dead hampsters, the Cucumber Caper - all true.
The Bill Bennett stuff, Paul Harvey and the horses - all true, every word.

Every word on every page is 100 percent accurate, so believe it.
Take it to the bank.
Repeat it.
Publish it (with attribution, of course) because it's all true!