Little
'Silvio' Steven's speech
to the Radio and Records suits
Fred Jacobs introduces 4-minute video bio. At
its conclusion the Dovells' "You Can't Sit Down" explodes
from the speakers as 5 Go-Go girls come out of the wings surrounding
Fred, much to his discomfort. Little Steven enters to thunderous applause.
He cuts off the music with a wave of his hand, leans into the microphone
and says "Ladies and Gentlemen, Fred Jacobs."
The music returns as the girls exit.
A stunned audience applauds wildly as Fred, very uncharacteristically,
dances off with them.
Little Steven: Well
that was worth the price of admission alone. (more applause and laughter)
(paces with the hand held mic for a minute, and then . . . )
I Love Radio! (applause once again erupts) And
I feel nothing but love in this room because
as I look around, I see only two kinds of people. Our beloved affiliates
. . . and future affiliates.
(laughter) So now matter what happens in this next half hour, remember
what I just said.
It's just family talking. And without any further disclaimers let me
ask the only important question
that is on my mind, and I'm sure you've been thinking about it also,
especially lately.
(pause)
WHEN DID THE F*CKING PUSSIES TAKE OVER?
(applause and laughter)
When? Don't you look forward to the day when
your grandson is on your knee and
he looks up and says, "Grampa weren't you
in radio once?"
"Yes, Grandson," you'll reply.
"Could I ask you something," he'll say.
"Of course, my love, anything," you'll say.
"Grampa where were you WHEN THE F*CKING PUSSIES TOOK OVER?"
(more laughter)
Where were we? What happened?
Things are out of line and we're not leaving
here today until we straighten it out.
(applause and laughter)
Now I was going to wait for this but we might
as well get right to it since it is all everybody's
talking about. I have come to praise JACK not to bury him. (laughter
- uncertain applause)
The guys at Infinity are friends of ours, as is everybody else, we got
nothing but friends you
all know that. And I've gotta say I'm proud of these guys for having
the balls to shake things up.
Things needed shaking up. And history will remember them in a very positive
way when looking
back at this world changing moment. Having said that . . .
Replacing 33 year old New York oldies institution CBS-FM with JACK is
like replacing the
Statue of Liberty with a blow-up doll.
(eruptions of laughter and applause)
But again, change is good. And necessary. With
a little bit of luck JACK will last 10 or 12 months
because it is obvious people want something different, they are hungry
for something, anything.
So it could be 6 months before anybody actually listens to JACK. Once
they do it is doomed
for 3 obvious reasons. At the moment it is replacing oldies formats
but it is not an oldies format
in the true sense of the word. It's mostly 80's, some 70's, some 90's.
Now it must be said that
the oldies format is vulnerable because over the last 5-10 years it
has, in a word, sucked.
It has sucked for a very simple reason, somebody had the brilliant idea
to eliminate the 50's and
replace it with the 70's. This was done by somebody uniquely stupid
and deaf and ignorant and a
bad businessman on top of it all. So naturally, everybody copied it
and the 50's disappeared virtually overnight.
Now let's digress and examine this oldies thing for a minute. Assuming
you accept the fact that those
overseeing the oldies format these last 5 years - 10 years - are, in
fact, stupid, deaf, ignorant, and bad
businessmen, let's deal with it. As far as stupid, deaf, and ignorant,
when it comes to decades that matter,
that matter historically, in terms of influence, importance, and never-to-be-heard-again-quality
- that is
the 50's and 60's. Everything we do, everything we are comes from those
two decades.
You're gonna throw one away? You're gonna replace Elvis, Little Richard,
Gene Vincent, Eddie Cochran,
Johnny Burnette, Chuck Berry, Bo Diddley, Buddy Holly, Lloyd Price,
and Fats Domino with, all due respect,
Donna Summer and the Bee Gees? You're gonna replace primal, vital, timeless,
forever cool rock and roll
pioneers with disco? Disco?
You wanna know what disco is good for? Disco
is for when you're drunk at a wedding with your old lady
and you want to act like an idiot and be John Travolta for an hour or
two. That's where it belongs. Not on radio.
And to the issue of oldies being bad business
- all you hear - I'm assuming from sales people - is we must
lower our demo's. The oldies demographic are getting too old - that's
the rationale for replacing the 50's with the 70's.
Now if all there was to sell in the world were
Fruit Loops, Play Stations,and sneakers - they might have a point.
But I got a little secret to share. You know that age group - 35 to
65 - that nobody in sales seems to care about?
THAT'S WHERE ALL THE F*CKING MONEY IS!
(laughter, applause)
I mean ALL the f*cking money.
35 to 65.
Memo to sales team - SELL THEM SOMETHING!
And, by the way, if you want younger people listening,
you can get that done. And I mean kids, if you want them.
Who is cooler? Early Elvis or Elton John?
What appeals more to kids, Gene Vincent's black
leather attitude, Eddie Cochran's teenage frustration,
Little Richard's cry of liberation, and Dion's total Soprano's coolness
- or the Eagles?
You want wild? Put together the Sex Pistols,
Audioslave, and the Wu-Tang Clan - they aren't as wild as
Jerry Lee Lewis in his prime.
But you have to explain that. Show it, illustrate,
educate, sell it.
Alright - digression over - so JACK isn't oldies
so it must be some kind of classic rock/pop hybrid. But JACK
doesn't address the two biggest problems of classic rock. 15 years ago
I said we're chasing all the personality
out of rock radio and into talk and sports. And the ratings went with
it.
We need more personality, not less, and JACK
has none. No DJ's means no personal relationship
with the audience. Eventual apathy is inevitable.
The other big issue classic rock must consider
is it must start playing new music again.
I've suggested it to my own affiliates and I'll
keep saying it every change I get. We've got a big problem.
Look around. Pearl Jam does some business. Dave Matthews - if he's rock
at all - does well.
Maybe Oasis breaks this year in the U.S. Maybe Coldplay - if they're
considered rock.
But in a real sense, the last big band through
the door was U2. That's 25 years ago.
Has anybody stopped to consider that? Basically
when our generation stops touring, it's over.
That's one reason why we started the Underground Garage format. New
Hard Rock, Hip Hop,
and Pop can be heard in various places, new Rock and Roll had nowhere
to go. We have played
more new bands in 3 years than anybody since the 60's. We average 30
new bands a year.
That's how many are out there. And we are very picky out of respect
to our classic rock affiliates,
we know we need to keep the quality level high and we do.
But we can't sell records with 2 hours a week.
Someday somebody will have the balls to put the
Underground Garage format on 24-7 on broadcast radio
but until then, we only have 2 hours a week.
We need your help.
Rock and Roll is not just that museum down the
street. It's a living, breathing animal that needs to be fed.
With new blood. And I'm not saying you need to
do as much as we do, we're about 40% new and the rest
from the entire 50 years of history. And by the way everybody told us
you can't combine old with new but
of course you can. As long as you're making your decisions based on
musical experience, good taste,
and an effective, coherent emotional communication. As opposed to your
Ipod on shuffle.
(laughter, applause)
When you properly combine old and new the old
records give the new ones a sense of depth, of belonging
to an eternal continuum, carrying the flag forward. The new records
give the old ones relevance, keeps them
vital, connected to the next generation.
And all testing and computer analysis and surveys
don't tell you that.
It's all bullsh*t. When are we going to learn
that? (applause)
All that sh*t tells you is what people think
they want right now. Well that's not the way
great radio happens, or great anything. You don't do a survey before
you write a song,
or make a record. We are drowning in an ocean of mediocrity because
sometimes you
gotta have enough historical perspective, and vision, and balls to say
we have to combine
short term want with long term need.
And yeah you gotta sell it.
If you're playing cool stuff make sure the audience
hears it right – in the right context.
That is everything.
If to a punky consciousness the Ramones are sugar
and the Ronettes are broccoli you play
the Ramones into the Ronettes and, because Joey learned to sing from
Ronnie and you can
hear it, the Ramones become hollandaise and it works.
(laughter, applause)
There is an art to this sh*t. You know that.
It's the corporate bosses that forget that fact.
But it's not just music - we have this problem plaguing every aspect
of our culture.
Yes content needs work, yes marketing needs work,
but it is the sales teams that need to be
re-educated and motivated and inspired and creative. And it's not happening
because they are
being led by business oversight guys. Content guys should be running
companies, marketing guys
should be running companies, who put business oversight guys in charge?
(applause)
Wall Street that's who.
Wall Street continues to love and reward and
worship short term success for some reason.
As the culture and the economy and all our fathers' and grandfathers'
and hundreds of years
of hard work get trashed in a generation or two. The tail is wagging
the dog.
Wall Street should not be calling the shots.
When did Wall Street ever write a song? Paint
a picture? Make a movie?
Play a song on the radio that changed somebody's life?
(applause)
Where are the music people?
I see lawyers, accountants, test marketers running
the world. Where is the emotional connection?
Where is the passion? This ain't about JACK or
BOB or Moe or Larry or Curly.
It's about you. Everybody in this room. You are here because you are
connected emotionally.
This ain't Harvard Business School. It's f*cking
Rock and Roll!
(applause)
These Wall Street cats couldn't have gotten us
here. They react – they don't create.
They didn't build this industry.
We did it.
And you're not here because it was a smart business
decision.
I know what you make.
(laughter)
(pauses - slows down)
You're here because you loved it once. And we've
got to find a way to love it again.
And communicate that love to our audience. I am determined - together
we will find a way.
The Revolution is on.
Thank you.
(standing ovation - thunderous applause)
Thanks to His Rudeness Rich