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How to Stay
Married Pt 2
A.K.A. Sedalia Trip Report Apr 24, 2010
After the fine BBQ dinner, we went back to the hotel to regroup.
Mrs. Bart was checking out the local Italian restaurants.
She settled on Figlio's
Italian Restaurante
Maybe the perfect weather and their outside dining had something to
do with her choice?
They had a deck in the shade so she opted for that.
Our table had a nice view of whatever park this is.
You could see the fountain across the street...
...that is, if your mother was a giraffe and your father was Captain Elastic.
The view of the park looking North was nice.
Wait, what's that blue van?
Oh shit, it's the whore press. I wish they would stop following us!
Double shit, there's more press whores from Fox - I'll slump in my seat and hide.
It took forever, but eventually our food came.
I, of course, got the spaghetti and meatballs like all nine-year
olds do.
The picture doesn't do it justice - it looked and tasted
great
My spaghetti and meatballs was so late, they gave me extra meatballs.
I was unable to finish - it's been a while since that's happened :)
She had her usual Fettucini Alfredo... again, it was better than this photo looks.
We left stuffed, and we went back to the hotel and watched Alan Grayson
on Bill Maher.
I swear, sometimes it sounds like he's reading from bartcop.com!
But the trip wasn't over yet.
Sidebar:
Driving in downtown KC, we saw this building - what is it?
It's in or near the Municiple Building and Convention Center, but it's a weird-looking building.
They had a weirder-looking building under construction (that I couldn't
shoot while driving)
that looked like it belonged in Vegas. Anybody know what that
is?
Very futuristic, Star Trek looking building.
Next morning we got up early and hit the road towards Sedalia, Missouri.
Driving East-Southeast, we took Hiway 50 thru Lone
Jack, then Pittsville, then
Knob Noster, Missouri.
I thought a picture of the Welcome to Knob Noster sign would
be funny, but it was raining and traffic was bad
and we were driving thru construction, etc so just imagine how funny
that sign'd look.
Wait, I found a picture of it online.
If I was from Knob Noster and you asked me where I was from, I'd say "Waverly, Missouri."
Eastward Ho we went, eventually finding Sedalia's Fairgrounds and the exciting Gourd Festival.
My heart was thumping so loud - we were about to see all the gourds!
The cost to get in? It was one dollar - each!
Ready for the cavalcade of fantastic gourds?
Huh?
I gotta confess, I'm not up on my types of gourds - they must have dozens.
There you go - some local Indian art on what I assume is a gourd.
Can you see the Jaguar (probably) on this one?
Not sure what this is - maybe this is what they use to play tennis in rural Missouri?
That's what we need - another 9-11 Memorial on a giant gourd.
This merry-go-round was turning - do gourds give off electrical current?
There's apparently no limit to the things you can do with gourds.
And to think this place is less than seven hours from Casa de Bart!!
A roadside garden scene painted on a big-as-a-watermelon gourd...
Here's a Rawhide tribute, which I thought worked.
This corner was labled, "Shitload of Gourds."
Look!
You can get SIX gourds for just $20!
They gave out prizes like this was The County Fair (maybe it was) so I hope this Harley won something.
Next was a tribute to Huck Finn, who grew up near here. (Getting near the end)
Here's one I found more than a little disturbing...
It looks like his head was mounted on a giant log.
He looks a little like McCain right after Sarah Palin introduced him
by saying,
"My friend John McCain was present at the
original Tea Bag Party in 1773."
"I told
Palin to stay on-script, dammit!"
Next up was the Moneyfish - it was for sale for $29.
I thought about buying it because it musta had $20 in quarters
on it.
I was getting so excited, ...I had to go sit in the car.
Eventually Mrs Bart got enough of seeing all the gourds and we were
headed home.
It was only about an eight-hour drive, with the construction
and the thunderstorms and all.
Damn, we had a great time.
While you were watching sports and drinking beer and downloading porn,
*I* was at the Show Me Gourd Festival, so try not to be too jealous,
OK?
So remember, guys, when you get married, steel yourself for lots of
gourd festivals.
All you gotta do is say, "I love Gourd
Festivals, Schnookums," and you'll never get divorced.