Wishing the 'President' wasn't a child killer POLITICS-SARCASM-FINE
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Quotes
''The president has every confidence in the
intelligence and that weapons will be found,'
'The president has full faith in Director
Tenet.''
-- Ari Fleischer (R-Forked Tongue)
So, they're going to blame it all on Tenet,
and he'll resign to give Bush cover.
As always, Bush is never held accountable
for anything he kills or steals.
Former CIA director Stansfield Turner accused
Bush of ''overstretching the facts''
about Iraqi weapons of mass destruction
in making its case for invading that country.
Turner's broadside adds the retired admiral's
name to a list of former intelligence
professionals concerned that the CIA and
its intelligence reports were manipulated to justify the war.
Turner said, ''There is no question in my
mind (Bush) distorted the situation, either
because he had bad intelligence or because
he misinterpreted it.''
"You
can't touch me - nobody can. I'm King George."
Quotes
"It's been 639 days since Bush said he'd catch
Osama bin Laden 'Dead or Alive!'"
--posted at Counterspin Central,
06/18/03
"...but,
I've been busy with my oil ventures..."
No Fun with Math
It seems like every day another American soldier dies in Bush's fake war.
A quick glance at the record tells us:
Reagan
got 240 Marines killed in Lebanon in 1983 after insisting they be housed
on land
instead of on ships where pickups full of dynamite can't reach them.
Bush
the smarter got 150 killed in Iraq after Ambassador Glaspie told Saddam
he could take Kuwait.
Bush
the dumber got 175 killed in Iraq, so far, with his insatiable hardon
for Saddam's oil.
...but all anybody ever talks about are the 18 who Bush the smarter sent to Somalia.
Those 18 deaths in Clinton's term mean everything to the GOP-controlled
media,
but the 565
who died under Republicans are forgotten because they can't blame
Clinton.
To the GOP-controlled media, 18
is much, much bigger then 565.
You see, it's not about honoring those brave men for their sacrifice.
It's about making money feeding the Clinton hate machine.
Chief
Moose Steps Down After Book Clash
He's ready to cash in on the bodies
of the murdered
Excerpt:
Montgomery County Police Chief Charles
Moose, who led the hunt for the Beltway Sniper,
resigned Wednesday after a clash with county
politicians over his upcoming book on the investigation.
In March, the county ethics commission ordered
him to drop the project and barred him serving as
a consultant on a movie about the sniper
case, saying a county employee may not profit on the side from his official
duties.
The commission also said the book could
undermine the prosecution in the sniper case by catering to
"the public's thirst for all of those `inside'
details."
A book and a movie? How much is Moose going
to make from this tragedy?
Like Osama and Dubya, that sniper was the best thing to ever
happen to Chief Moose.
I've never liked this guy, and my suspicions were confirmed beyond
a doubt when they called
the press conference to tell America if the suspect they had
was, indeed, the Beltway sniper.
Moose preened onstage like he was Paula Jones, begging
for the spotlight - he was swimming in it.
At that press conference, he could've opened with,
"We have the Beltway Snipers," but nooooooooooooooooo.
He was soaking up the applause, mugging for the cameras, shaking
hands, giving speeches - it went on forever.
I really, really wanted to know if they had the guy, so
the entire country could exhale, but this arrogant knucklehead
kept posing for the cameras, no doubt the book and movie money
was swirling around in his head like a whirlpool.
He dragged this pitiful performance on forever and ever.
I eventually changed the channel, because I couldn't take it
anymore.
I was surprised I could muster that much disgust for someone
I hardly was aware of.
But it gets worse than that.
What if this greedy publicity hound had book and movie money swirling
in his head DURING the manhunt?
How do we know he didn't "sweeten the pot," a little or a lot?
How do we know he didn't disregard important clues,
so the story (and the book and movie money) would maybe buy him
TWO new houses instead of just one?
Let's pick a figure, say $2 million, that he'll get for the movie
and book deals on the 13 murder victims.
If Moose had caught the snipers after just three murders,
that $2M might have only been $400,000.
But if 25 had been murdered, would his reward have been $4M?
I don't like this one damn bit.
How do we know this publicity-hungry opportunist didn't see bigger dollar signs with each victim?
E-Mail Bart if you disagree.
Bart... step away from the Captain
Morgan's Spiced Rum.
put the shot glass down... and never look
back.
What the hell is a man of your stature doing
with swill such as that?
It was a joke.
Quotes
"Simon & Schuster has declared 'Living
History' to be the top-selling adult nonfiction book ever,
based on first-week sales of 600,000
copies. An additional 500,000 copies have been ordered on
top of an extraordinary initial printing
of 1 million copies, the publisher said."
-- Associated
Press
The vulgar Pigboy says S&S are lying. He claims to have a
"secret source," who said
S&S didn't print that many, because they had nowhere to store
a million books.
Duh!
How about storing them on outbound UPS trucks?
The Nazi right can't stand the fact that this book is so big.
Even before they read it, they branded it, "All lies."
Plus, remember Rush's "guarantee," that Hillary would never mention
Monica?
Rush gives out "guantees" as often as Nancy Grace.
Kerry:
Bush Misled Americans on War
It's almost like the Democrats have
found bartcop.com !
Excerpt:
John Kerry said Bush broke his promise
to build a coalition against Saddam,
and then waged a war based on questionable
intelligence.
ha ha
We know that last part is true :)
"He misled every one of us," Kerry said.
"That's one reason why I'm running to be
president."
"I will not let him off the hook throughout this
campaign with respect to America's credibility
and credibility to me because if he lied
he lied to me personally," he said.
Yes!
I might get a part-time job at McDonald's just to send Kerry campaign
money.
...not really, but damn - how long have we waited for this?
You see how easy that was?
All Kerry did was speak up, and he made major, nationwide news.
A shot of Chinaco Anejo for John Kerry for earning his paycheck this week.
Where are the other Democrats?
Quotes
"If media companies want to boost ratings and
credibility at the same time, they should
follow the lead of New York Times columnists
Paul Krugman and Nicholas D. Kristof
and make weapons of mass destruction
the top story of the summer. Not only has Bush
exaggerated the evidence that Iraq
had WMD, but now that news of their lies has leaked out,
the pro-war camp is spinning like mad.
The odds of exposing a major cover-up are looking
very good indeed...In retrospect, the
Bush administration's most publicized war stories have
all been the products of smoke and
mirrors. Contrary to the initial hype, the Hussein
"decapitation strike" turned up no bodies
and no bunkers. Chemical Ali walked out alive.
Jessica Lynch was never shot, stabbed,
or tortured by Iraqis. And despite all the hot tips
Ahmad Chalabi spoon-fed to New York
Times reporter Judith Miller, the WMD search
teams have not found a single silver
bullet or smoking gun. The war on Iraq is a Byzantine
puzzle that begins and ends with a
lie. The media have an obligation to expose it."
--Cynthia Cotts Reason
to Deceive
Subject:paying a tithe
My wife and I wanted to have our child baptised
Catholic (actually she wanted it, I really didn't care).
I was Methodist and divorced and my wife
had never been married so this was all my problem.
We went to talk with the parish priest about
it and he said it wasn't impossible but he wouldn't do
the deed unless I went through 6 months
of conversion classes and paid the parish $3000.
Until that day I had never cussed at a priest,
but it felt good to tell the fucker, "fuck you."
I became an atheist that day.
Stephen D
Sidebar:
Before anyone writes to accuse me of being a Catholic basher,
be ready to prove this story and
my radio story are both false. Better you should spend
that energy asking your priest why the
Catholic Church seels absolution to whoever can afford it.
This is nothing but a scam.
And as long as I'm going to catch hell for it anyway...
That bishop in Arizona who killed
that guy with a hit-and-run?
He knew God was watching. If he's any kind of Catholic,
he knew that for a FACT!
How in hell can you drive away from a killing and have a relationship
with God?
That tells me the bishop possibly doesn't believe there is a
God.
This same bishop had just made a deal to avoid prosecution for
serial child molestation.
He secretly relocated raping priests in unsuspecting parishes
- he organized these rapes.
He arranged for these rapes to happen, to some degree.
Maybe Keating was right.
So, Phoenix has a new bishop.
I wonder if he believes in God?
Dennis Miller can't stop shaking
Please visit our sponsor at
http://www.fauxnewschannel.com
Quotes
"I think that the amount of money that candidates
raise in our democracy
is a reflection of the amount of support
they have around the country."
--Ari Fletcher, with
a straight face
Ari knows that whoever has the most money
has the best ideas.
"Ari's
our boy - we paid top-dollar for him."
From: pleasure@aol.com
Subject: Who's more LIKELY to be LYING ?
Who's more likely to be lying:
a man who has the whole world watching
his every move,
or some twerpy hate-monger with a backwater
webpage
who nobody even knows who he is ?
The correct answer is so totally obvious I needn't say more !
But I did just put an end to THAT argument.
Sir or Madam, all you have to do is follow the money.
There is 11 trillion dollars missing from the United States
Treasury.
You think *II stole that money?
You say the whole world is watching Bush? Could be, but
who is saying,
"Stop, you're killing too many people!"
"Stop, that oil doesn't belong to you!"
"Stop, you're bankrupting America with those
crazy tax cuts for the super-ruch!"
Nobody but the twerpy "hate-monger" with a backwater webpage and a few other web sites.
By the way, if you ever want your ass kicked, I debate dittoheads in the live BartCop Chat room.
Other weapons distracted people
June 18, 2003
Enough is enough. I have decided, after
much thought, that I can no longer support the party
I have been a member of since I cast my
first vote some 35 years ago.
The iceberg that sank my Republican Party
Titanic was WMDestruction or rather the non-existence thereof.
I, like millions of other Americans, supported
the war on Iraq because we were told and believed that Saddam
was a threat to America and the security
of the world.
There is nothing like a good war to take
our minds off the real problems at home. Never mind the cost to the
national economy or the anguish of thousands
of families at home worrying about their sons and daughters
fighting and dying in a far-off place.
I was one of those who worried, but I was proud when my son,
an Air Force captain, was sent to Iraq
to do his duty.
Now I realize that I should have been concerned
about WED, a three-fold acronym that stands for Weapons
of Economic Destruction, Weapons of Environmental
Destruction and Weapons of Educational Destruction:
the tax bill that benefits almost exclusively
the wealthy, the shameful legislation that postpones the Everglades
cleanup and the total disregard for the
educational needs of our children despite lip service to the contrary.
The Brothers Bush and their corporate cronies,
who wield these weapons, have made me take a hard look
at who I want to govern this state and
this country. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
S.L. Smith
"Stop picking on Dubya!
He'd never lie to us!
He's our president! And a war-time
hero, too!"
Excerpt:
The DJs sought help from Castro in tracking
down a suitcase containing secret documents
"Chavez" said he lost during the leaders'
recent trip to Argentina.
Eventually, a man posing as a Chavez aide
asked Castro: "Do you agree with the shit on the island, murderer?"
and added, "You fell for it ... the
whole of Miami is listening to you, Fidel Castro."
"What did I fall for, you shit?" the irate
Cuban leader answered, adding further crude expletives, including
references to the anatomy of the host's
mother. Castro eventually hung up, ending the 25-minute conversation.
ha ha
What's more fun than f-ing with brutal, murdering dictators?
I don't know - I do it every day!
ha ha
Serious Sidebar:
It it was worth losing 175 American lives
"to
free the Iraqi people,"
why doesn't Bush free his 90-mile neighbors
in Cuba, instead?
Rush says "Freedom comes from God,"
which begs the question,
"What does God have against the people of Cuba?"
Click to Enter
So if you're Jewish, and you find yourself possessed by the
Catholic's devil,
do you look for the closest 'Catholic Exorcism specialist,'
...or just call your Rabbi?
I asked Tommy Mack this question, and he replied, "Jews don't get possessed."
ha ha
Jews don't do the whole possesssion thing?
Good for them!
Since there is no Devil (Get real, people!) there's no need
for any exorcisms.
Counseling and Psychotherapy for
Individuals, Couples and Groups
Dave rode a Segway on last night's show.
He didn't fall off because he's not a clueless moron.
Marty's
E! page
A 6th season for 'The Sopranos'
Les Paul & B.B. King
Thanks to Hillary, Letterman beat Leno
Rock & Roll Fantasy camp
Stan Lee, Lou Ferrigno & 'The Hulk'
Ex-managers suing Michael Chiklis
The New York Daily News, sued by Harry Potter
And sports didn't help ABC/Disney in the ratings last week
click
Excerpt:
Delving deeper than Congress' inquiry,
the independent commission investigating the
Sept. 11 attacks has made far-reaching
requests for documents from Bush and does not
expect Bush to invoke executive privilege,
officials say.
Bush has made clear in prior investigations
unrelated to terrorism that it intends to protect
executive privilege, the doctrine that
a president is entitled to confidential advice from his
aides that he may keep from congressional
or judicial bodies.
Bush will fight with everything he had to stonewall this investigation.
He can't let the truth about 9-11 get out, and expect to be elected
again.
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Quotes
"By now you’ve heard of the boxing match that
O.J. Simpson and Joey Buttafuco might have.
O.J. has set up a few ground rules
for the fight. He won’t fight unless Buttafuco wears a blonde wig."
-- Leno
Excerpt:
The Environmental Protection Agency is
preparing to publish a draft report next week on the environment,
but after editing by the White House, a
long section describing risks from rising global temperatures has
been whittled to a few noncommittal paragraphs.
The editing eliminated references to many
studies concluding that warming is at least partly caused by
rising concentrations of smokestack and
tail-pipe emissions and could threaten health and ecosystems.
Bush is taking bribes from our biggest polluters to allow them
to rape the environment.
Can we get some Democrats to raise some hell about this?
....................
Rape me
Pollute me
Drill me
Kill me
Trash me
"Hey,
fuck the environment - this is about my family making more money!"
Faux
Andy passes it on.
by James Higdon
Excerpt:
I got an e-mail from a dear friend last
week. The e-mail contained an
article attributed to Andy Rooney, saying
"Andy Rooney tells it like it is!"
I knew halfway through that Rooney never
wrote the article because,
while it followed in a similar curmudgeon
rhythm, it was just so unlike Andy.
But this is a new type of right wing "plagiarism."
The idea is not to pass on
someone else's work with one's own name
on it, but to put someone's credible
name on one's own easily dismissed work.
The idea being that if it comes
from someone we like, we will be less eager
to throw it in the trash.
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Call the
918-493-1500-
you have two minutes to rant away.
Quotes
"It must be tough to be Dick Morris. No R will
hire you to perform your chosen profession,
political consultant, because you worked
for President Clinton and paid big money to lick the
athlete's foot fungus from the soles
of a prostitute. No D will hire you because you worked for
Trent Lott and Jesse Helms and paid
big money to lick the athlete's foot fungus from the soles
of a prostitute. With disclosure laws,
no sane pol or PAC would even pay you under the table
for a consult. Even Payless Shoe Source
wouldn't hire you, due to liability issues. Your only
remaining career option is to sell
personal tales, true or not, concerning the Clintons to the
wingnut media. As soon as you exhaust
those stories, your only source of income dries up.
And the longer the President is out
of office, every new tale will have people asking
"Why did he wait so long to tell that
one, if it's true?" Then there's the difficulty in keeping
your stories straight. As Joe Conason
points out, Dickie Footjoy has now told three versions
of an encounter with Bill Clinton,
and admits that the version he told in a 1997 book was false.
So you have zero credibility. You are
now just one sorry-ass Dick."
-- the non-Nazi Roger
Ailes, http://rogerailes.blogspot.com
Test
of Missile System Misses Target
Another test, another miss. Call us if you get a hit?
Excerpt:
A missile fired from a Navy cruiser missed
its airborne target Wednesday
in an unsuccessful test of a sea-based
missile defense system, the Defense Department said.
It was the second consecutive failed missile
test over the Pacific after a series of successful
strikes in the past 2 1/2 years, and the
first failure of a sea-based test.
Critics have questioned whether Bush's goal
is feasible and whether the
threat of attack is sufficient to justify
the expense.
"It's
not about building a shield to protect America.
It's about my friends getting billions to "research" a shield."
Have a good time today - that's an order.
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Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright
© 2003, bartcop.com
Maybe someday Shirley will call to say "Hi!" on the Bart-Phone
at 918-493-1500
That will be cool.