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Tues-Wed May 12-13, 2009 Vol 2333 - Give 'em TX, OK
 Quote of the Day "I don't know how the guests get booked,”
I never liked this Gibbs guy much and this doesn't help.
|
In
Today's Tequila Treehouse...
|
In THE THIN WHITE LINE, author Craig DiLouie presents
a terrifying vision about how
a pandemic might unfold, focusing on the Canadian
experience but relevant to any country.
Reading as if it were a non-fiction book describing
a pandemic that has already happened,
THE THIN WHITE LINE presents a realistic, meticulously
researched scenario.
"Craig DiLouie provides us with a clairvoyant
glimpse of life during the coming influenza pandemic. . . ."
—Grattan Woodson, MD, FACP
author of THE BIRD FLU MANUAL
Quotes
"Obama just can't come out and say, 'I'm for
nationalization. I think that his goal here is to dramatically
increase federal spending in a host of areas
and to nationalize the financial structures system. And if he
can do both of those things using the recession/depression
as his excuse, he's going to do it."
-- Dick Morris, liar and whore, claiming Obama wants to nationalize the
whole country, Link
Butt Dick, if you want GM and Chrysler to go out of business,
just say so.
If you want the banks to fail, just say so.
If you want the housing industry to crash, just say so.
Obama is fixing the mess you bastards made.
What's your solution?
How will more tax cuts for the super-rich stabilize our economy?
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
See more at whatnowtoons.com
More Tort
Memos Coming
Why is Cheney so afraid the truth might get out?
Excerpt:
There’s a big piece of news about Dick Cheney
and torture buried toward the end of this big Washington Post piece about
the torture wars.
Specifically: The White House will release a classified
2004 CIA report about the torture program that is reported to have found
no proof
that torture foiled any terror plots - directly
contradicting Cheney’s lies. The paper cites “allies” of the White House
as a source.
Dem Congressional staffers tell me this report
is the “holy grail,” because it is expected to detail torture in unprecedented
detail
and to cast doubt on the claim that torture works
- and its release will almost certainly trigger howls of protest from conservatives.
I say bring it on.
The Rethugs will have to call an emergency meeting to discuss how to
make it go away:
Do they say, "The memo is a lie?"
Hard to do with Bush's CIA doing the writing.
Do they say, "We did it, but we had to?"
Where the proof of that?
Will the Democrats choose to run and hide?
Or will they stand and fight?
I think we both know the answer to that.
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Subject: Peace everlasting
If there is anyone out there lurking, still mad
about Bart’s support of Hillary, I’d like to ask you to come home.
Nobody gave Bart more shit than I did but I knew
something he didn’t.
We totally rocked Dona Ana County, NM.
We won the state.
If your feelings are still hurt, if you haven’t
been reading, let me tell you, Bart has been
a big supporter of the Obama Administration.
Bart’s one of the best we’ve got.
Never count the “Obama is the Anti-Christ” Republicans
out of the race. Never, never, never.
We won by 7 points this time, we can lose by
7 next time.
The economy is inevitably in for a few bad years
of bad news.
Don’t, for God’s sake, turn over power to the
Palin/Plumber ticket.
Fight. Win. Fight again.
Rock on, Bart. You da man.
Wes in LC
Wes, thanks for that, but the people who left
in a huff won't see it :)
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Multiple
organ failure
by Mary Ellen Synon, liar and whore
Excerpt:
When Silvio Berlusconi made a light-hearted joke
last year about the Obama's 'suntan' the American press corps
expressed outrage at what they tried to blow-up
to be a racist remark from a right-wing politician. Yet Saturday night,
when Obama made a joke about the skin colour
of John Boner, the journalists thought it was frightfully witty.
You're trying to call a suntan joke against a
white guy racist?
Boner laughed at it - it was a joke - so what's wrong with you?
And when Wanda Sykes attacked the Fascist vulgar
Pigboy, she said Limbaugh's opinions
were treason and that he was no better than Osama
bin Laden.
She was telling the truth there - he wants Obama to fail, just like Osama does.
There were big grins from the president through all of this.
It's called humor.
Get over it, then get over your pompous ass.
Then Sykes said she wished Limbaugh's kidneys
would fail. The president laughed through it all.
Which only goes to show that Limbaugh's observation
on this administration is correct: they don't want
to debate, he says. They only want to destroy.
It was a light-hearted evening of fun and jokes,
not a debate.
Christ, you're so stupid you don't know that?
You can't make any points by telling the truth
or staying on-topic, so you make shit up.
I guess I might do the same thing - if I was
on the wrong side of the facts.
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Erik has been advertising on bartcom.com since 2002.
Quotes
"In a nutshell: Liberal comedian Wanda Sykes
indulged in Palin-bashing, Rush Derangement Syndrome,
and post-Bush/Cheney-induced psychosis while
leftist journalists rubbed elbows with politicos and Tinseltown
eye candy. They all Twittered and tittered
and Flickr-ed and snickered together at various D.C. before, during,
and after-parties. It was the most self-absorbed
night in Washington. Since the inaugural, I mean."
-- Michelle Malkin, not invited to the big party,
Link
The real reason she's mad is everybody
was reminded of the superb beatdown that Stephen Colbert put on Bush,
because Bush's White House was too goddamn
stupid to realize that Colbert was the enemy.
Malkin, seen here screaming thew f-word
at somebody, maybe a poor person or a single mother.
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We're on Twitter
Look for bartcop
Note: If you sign up,
you'll get a Twitter message
when that day's page goes up.
Quotes
"While President Obama has no plan for what
to do with these killers, he has pledged
to close the torture center at Gitmo
to fulfill a campaign promise."
-- Kit Bond, (R-Misery) Link
Butt Kit, (How gay is the first name 'Kit' anyway?) are
you saying these guys
are so bad-ass that there's no prison in America that can hold
them?
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Subject: Bush reading 'My Pet Goat'
Bart, dude.
Speaking of ---
> "Could it be because YOU set this up and didn't tell the Top Stooge?"
--- that scene in Farenheit 9/11,
with Bush staring off into space at the elementary school,
sitting on a 2nd Grader's chair with My Pet Goat
forgotten in his paws, that long, long take of him
looking very fucking lost and confused, not saying
anything, just sitting there staring off into space
I wondered what was going on in his head and
figured basically he was thinking something like,
"So that's what those guys were talking about.
Whoah, shit."
Doug
Doug, Bush had a lot on his mind that day - wondering
how that poor goat
was going to find his way back to little Billy
and the family farm.
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Who'll run
the NYW Times?
You mean Drudge, Cheney and Rush are moving on?
Excerpt:
Every day for months now, pundits and peanut
gallery members have weighed in on the subject of what The New York Whore
Times
might do to save itself. The prevailing wisdom
is that the Times - arguably the most influential and well-regarded newspaper
on the planet
(insert vomit graphic here)
- is in peril of disappearing, and jeez, if the Grey Lady can't survive, who will, and what does that portend for the future of journalism?
If no johns want to bang the Old Grey Whore, maybe she should get out of the business.
The Whore Times newspaper is holding up better
than many of its competitors amid the media meltdown, and the company's
problems
are largely corporate in nature. So a better
question is: who might end up controlling the newspaper and what will they
do with it?
How about we let Joe the Plumber have it?
He couldn't do a worse job than the Steno Judes who work their now.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Quotes
"Michael (Tom)
Steele is a huge shock because he's different, and not just because he's
African American.
He's different because he's a free
spirit. He's used to saying what he thinks. He's controversial. He has
enormous energy. He has great self-confidence."
-- Newt Ginrich, who's happy with Steel saying the
GOP primary voters rejected Mitt Romney, Link
When Gingrich runs in 2012, you know the Democrats will be too
scared to list the facts, one of which
is that Newt told his wife he wanted a divorce when she was in
the hospital being treated for cancer and
another is that he cheated on wife #1 with wife #2, and
he cheated on wife #2 with wife #3.
Well, we won't be afraid to mention those things - about 1,000
times.
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Bush's & Cheney's Amerikkka
Subject: Children raped at Abu Ghraib
Bush's torture program included sodomizing children
in front of their mothers at Abu Ghraib. These are crimes that
were committed by Americans in the name of America
under control of the President. These were not just a few rogue
low level prisons guards and justice is not served
by allowing those who ordered the raping of children to go unpunished.
We as Americans have to at least prosecute the
people at the top to show the world
that torture doesn't change from right to wrong
based on which party is in office.
Marc Perkel
San Bruno, CA.
Founder of the Church of Reality
http://www.churchofreality.org
"Reality changed my life. It can change you
life too!"
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Still the best advertising bargain on the Net
Banner ads by the day,
by the week,
or by the month
Subject: America's Domestic Enemies
When Sean Hannity asks what kind of violence is
best.
http://www.fair.org/images/hannitypoll.bmp
When the governor of Texas speaks openly about
secession.
http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/APStories/stories/D97J48IO2.html
When the Congresswoman from Minnesota calls on
her constituency to take up arms against the government.
http://greeninc.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/03/25/michele-bachmann-seeks-armed-and-dangerous-opposition-to-cap-and-trade/
When Glenn Beck characterizes the President's
performance as equivalent to pouring gasoline on the citizenry.
http://www.foxnews.com/video/index.html?playerId=videolandingpage&streaming
It is high time to expose these seditious types
who disguise their true intentions by flag backdrops.
They are not patriots. They are not merely engaging
in free speech. They are inciting rebellion,
every bit as dangerous as elements in other countries
that have overthrown democratic governments.
Small and new, yes, but gathering strength. Allow
them, ignore them at your peril.
Scott
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog
Quotes
"He doesn't need the money. He has no further
political ambitions. He is not hot for interns. He is not a torture freak.
He knows that he is toxic and despised
by the drive-by media and the Democrat party and the left in this country.
What motivation does Dick Cheney have
to go out and say these things? Is it possible that Dick Cheney is motivated
by national interest? Is it possible
that Dick Cheney is motivated by love of and for his country? Is it possible
that
Dick Cheney is speaking from his heart
and is not speaking politically?"
-- the vulgar Pigboy, Link
Hey Pigboy, it's possible Cheney is a Eskimo named Nanook, but I don't think that's the case.
And why did you say Cheney was hated by the media and the Left,
but you failed to mention Republicans hate him, too?
And if Cheney was motivated by a love of country, and not the
billions Halliburton stole with their no-bid contracts,
why didn't he serve honorably when he had the chance?
Truth is, Cheney sold oil field equipment to Saddam all thru the
nineties and then he had his Monkey invade Iraq
so the two of them could steal all the precious sweet crude oil
Halliburton could pump out in 6 years.
Butt Pigboy, here's the REAL reason Cheney was motivated to become the Monkey's organ grinder.
Iraq pumped 3.5M
barrels daily before
Bush invaded
and then they got their 2003 Halliburton
upgrade
Bush's oil gouge, which went to $100
$120a
barrel
makes $420,000,000
Bush
and Cheney stole every day.
No wonder they were so eager to start a war, stealing $420,000,000 every day.
It's the biggest theft in Earth's history.
And what did it cost them?
Not much...
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F-ing Bill Gates
I download a bunch of cartoons - usually about
40 per issue.
Each time I download a toon, Bill Gates puts
up a big box that says,
"You just downloaded a toon, Dude."
Yeah, I f-ing know Bill, and do you know how I
know?
Because I just downloaded the son of a bitch, that's how.
Sure, it's just one click to make it go away but
that's another 40 clicks
and I'm a busier-than-ever man with more-shit-than-ever
to get to.
And why does Explorer always have to open on My
Documents?
Why can't it open on the Bartcop folder where
I last left it?
All those re-tools, all the new versions of Windows
and they can't fix their mistakes?
It's like they think it's their job to bother the user.
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Wow, did you see that House last night?
They promised us a shocker - and they weren't kidding.
Quotes
"I’d have to see what the circumstances are...."
-- Dick Cheney, asked on Face the Whore if he'd testify under
oath, Link
Translation:
"Fuck no, I'm too old to do time for perjury."
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De-basing Torture
Excerpt:
The argument against torture is slipping away
from us. In fact, I'm getting the sinking feeling that it's over.
What was once taboo is now publicly acknowledged
as completely acceptable by many people. Indeed,
disapproval of torture is now being characterized
as a strictly partisan issue, like welfare reform or taxes...
We are in big trouble when torture becomes just
another political football. It's the kind of thing that turns
powerful empires into pariah nations. Why anyone
thinks it's good for America for the world to perceive us
as violent, pants wetting, panic artists who
could start WWIII at the least sign of threat is beyond me.
I agree - the torture argument is slipping away.
Most Rethugs and half the media are openly pro-turture.
"We had to torture him to death - what if
he knew something?" isn't how things are supposed to be.
Did you ever see that Star Trek Next Generation where the timeline got
screwed up and the Federation
had been at war for multiple generations? And Whoopie Goldberg
played a different kind of being
who just knew things wereen't supposed to be the way they were.
That's what Bush & Cheney did to America.
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Subject: Carrie Prejean vs Paris Hilton
Bart,
Sometimes I don’t understand. Carrie Prejean
is a beauty contest contestant.
She said what she thinks, as inarticulate as
that may have been. She’s utterly insignificant.
Why are you, a defender of Paris Hilton, piling
on? The stupid kid didn’t do anything wrong.
She spoke her mind. Fine, you disagree
with her beliefs, but that’s not supposed to be a reason
to demand that she be ridiculed and demeaned,
to wallow in schaedenfreud as she’s stripped of
the only accomplishment she’s ever likely to
attain.
Leave her be.
She’s an unarmed opponent.
PeYo
Carrie Prejean is a "role model" for bigots, racists
and cave people.
The bigots are losing this war - kids don't hate
gays, and why shouldn't
I take issue with someone who's on the backwards
side of politics?
It's kinda what we do here at bartcop.com
When did Paris ever run an anti-civil rights campaign?
...and why would a dude object to a picture of
a topless beauty queen?
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Got an iPhone?
What are your favorite three applications?
Subject: 3 favorite iphone apps
1. Remote - Allows me to control iTunes
on the laptop that is
connected to my stereo from anywhere in the house!
Change songs, adjust volume, etc. Amaze your friends!
2. Zynga Live Poker - Like Full Tilt but on the phone - No money, just fun.
3. iheartradio - Stations from all over
the country streaming live.
Chris W
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Star Trek Movie Gets Even Bigger
No spoilers - go ahead and read
Excerpt:
A bigger-than-expected Sunday box office delivered
Star Trek a $75.2 million opening weekend.
That gross is nearly $3 million greater than
the weekend estimate of $72.5 million.
The retooled Trek's four-day, Thursday-Sunday
haul now stands at $79.2 million.
Well ...Duh!
We saw the 10:30 Sunday morning showing and I get home to read the film
made $72M for the weekend?
How did they know how many people would see the film Sunday?
They fixed their stupid mistake.
BTW, great movie.
They could've shortened the early parts some - we didn't need to spend
all that time with Spock and Kirk
as children, but - maybe that's why the film has such an emotional
payoff as the minutes tick by.
I wasn't Dole-at-Nixon's-funeral about it, but we've grown close to
these characters over 40 years and it
was emotionally satisfying to see them meet for the first time and
get to know each other, stuff like that.
It was so good, we plan to see it in the theater again and it's been
forever since we did that.
How good was it?
It reminded me of Raiders of the Lost Ark - it was that
good.
I totally bought the new Kirk and the new Spock.
The Bones was good, as was the Scotty - none of them were disappointing
- and the best news?
Since this one made so much, they'll be at least two more Star Trek movies
and I like that.
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We have broken the $3,000
level!
Thanks to all who have been so generous.
I know what you're thinking...
"I've been reading bartcop.com
for years,
maybe I should send Ol' Bart a 'love' check."
Fact is - about 2% contribute in good times
and right now times are tough.
.
Help Bartcop.com
survive!
The kitties need food, too.
OR send a 'love' check to
bartcop.com
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155
Oklahoma wants out, too
Link (Turn down your speakers, I hate talky links)
Excerpt:
Although Democratic Gov. Brad Henry vetoed similar
legislation 10 days earlier,
Rethug House members Monday again approved a
resolution claiming Oklahoma’s sovereignty.
Unlike House Joint Resolution 1003, House Concurrent
Resolution 1028 does not need the governor’s approval.
The House passed the measure 73-22. It now goes
to the Senate.
"We’re going to get it done one way or the other,”
said the resolutions’ author, Rep. Charles Key, (R-Handjob).
"I think our governor is out of step.”
Yeah, our governor is so crazy he wants to remain an American.
Geez, do they get any crazier than these Okie bastards?
The Okie Handjob Manifesto
An update from Oklahoma .
The state law passed today, 37 to 9, had a few
liberals in the mix, an amendment to place the Ten Commandments
on the front entrance to the state capitol.
The feds in D.C., along with the ACLU, said it would be a mistake.
Hey this is a conservative state, based on Christian
values! Guess what..........We did it anyway.
If you were a real conservative, you wouldn't want the government
to choose your religion for you.
If you were a real Christian, you'd want to chose your own
religion, Dumbass!
We recently passed a law in the state to incarcerate
all illegal immigrants, and ship them back to where they came from,
unless they want to get a green card and become
an American citizen. They all scattered. Hope we didn't send any
of
them to your state. This was against the
advice of the Federal Government, and the ACLU, they said it would
be a mistake.
Guess what..........we did it anyway.
Actually, they did worse than that.
They made it a felony to hire an "illegal," as if that comes stamped
on one's foot.
They made it a felony to give a ride to an "illegal."
They made it a felony to allow an "illegal" to stay at your home.
Hell, these days, you have to cut your own lawn.
Yesterday we passed a law to include DNA samples
from any and all illegals to the Oklahoma database,
for criminal investigative purposes. Pelosi
said it was unconstitutional. Guess what........We did it anyway.
Yeah, who cares what the US Constitution says?
We're Okies, we're as dumb as they come and proud as Porter peaches about
it.
Several weeks ago, we passed a law, declaring
Oklahoma as a Sovereign state, not under the Federal Government directives.
That, for your information, makes Oklahoma
and Texas the only states to do so. Guess what.........More states are
likely to follow.
Louisiana, Alabama, Georgia, both Carolina's,
Tennessee, Kentucky, Missouri, Arkansas, West Virginia, just to name
a few.
Should Mississippi act, so will Florida Save
your confederate money, it appears the South is about to rise
up once again.
Yep, they can't wait to hang them some Black people.
How'd them darkies get here, anyway?
Oh, yeah - that's right.
We kidnapped them and forced them onto ships.
The federal Government has made bold steps to
take away our guns.
Of course, they can't name these "bold steps" because that didn't happen.
Oklahoma, a week ago, passed a law confirming
people in this state have the right to bear arms and transport them in
their vehicles.
I'm sure that was a set back for the Kennedy's
and Ms Pelosi. Guess what..........We did it anyway.
Yep, we're Okies, as dumb as they come and damn proud of it.
By the way, Obama does not like any of this.
Guess what....who cares...were doing it anyway.
Of course - he's half darkie - who cares what some darkie thinks?
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Subject: Storming the Bastille
Yes, you can prosecute the previous administration. The late Allan Sherman said it very well…
Louis the Sixteenth was the King of France
in 1789.
He was worse than Louis the Fifteenth.
He was worse than Louis the Fourteenth.
He was worse than Louis the Thirteenth.
He was the worst since Louis the First.
You went the wrong way, Old King Louie.
You made the population cry.
'Cause all you did was sit and pet
With Marie Antoinette
In your place at Versailles.
If you had been a nicer king,
We wouldn't do a thing,
But you were bad, you must admit.
We're gonna take you and the Queen
Down to the guillotine,
And shorten you a little bit.
Thanks to Dean
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Full Tilt Poker
If you sign up, tell them bartcop
sent you.
They'll give us both some extra chips.
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Observation
When Obama reveals his choice for the next Supreme
Court justice,
if the talk radio whores and cable Nazi's don't
say,
"This is the worst pick Obama could've possibly
made,"
...I'm probably going to be a little bit angry with him.
Seriously, I think he should go Jane Fonda, then Bartcop, then Mike
Malloy.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog
Subject: Re: Michael Steel Lawn jockey
You kill me, Bart. Hilarious (guilty laughter).
Rick
I was hoping you were writing to complain :)
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Marty's Entertainment Page
Marty always has good stuff.
Need to take a sudden trip?
World Series of Poker
If you intend to play in the May 30th Event,
The Rio
wants your money by this coming Friday
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Subject: How the Dems could screw this whole thing up
Bart, here's my top 5 reasons how the Democrats
might blow it.
5. Declare Nancy Pelosi 'speaker for life'.
4. Send a few Dem senators over to the Repub
side just to 'even things out'.
3. Remind everyone that Michelle Bachman is still
a Congresswoman and that her opinions count too.
2. Admit that they were briefed in 2003 but believed
Cheney when he told them that waterboarding was a beach sport.
1. Help promote Harry Reid's upocoming autobiography
"Not All Humans are Vertebrates".
Frank
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Why subscribe?
There are 151 shows online to listen to.
That's a lot of BCR
You can select a monthly plan to provide recurring support.
Please sign up for whatever you can afford.
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OR send a 'love' check to
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Tulsa, OK 74155
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manually process your donation monthly.
Check out the toons and stuff
on the Bart Blog!
Worldwide Bartcop
They read it in Stuttgart, Germany
They read it in Stuttgart, Arkansas
They read it in Arches, France
They read it in Arches, Utah
They read it in Invercargill, New Zealand
They read it in Carville, Louisiana
Want
to sell stuff everywhere?
Why sell just to America when you can sell to the whole world?
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Bartcop Radio
First the roofers showed up to fix the leak in my office.
Then the thunderstorms made them leave - but then the lights went out.
I WILL do a radio show this week.
Subject: Donation
Bart, sorry I couldn't donate lately - money troubles,
Bronte in Australia
Bronte, I appreciate every donation that comes my way.
or send a "love" check to
bartcop.com
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155
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Sarah Michelle
Gellar - No Buffy Movie?
Why would all involved turn down all that money?
Check out hundreds of Sarah Michelle Gellar pictures at BC Hotties
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BCR Show
#151
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