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 BCR
#160 is here
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Tuesday Dec 23, 2009 Vol 2443 - Raisin Takit
 Quote of the Day "The US economy is not suitable
|
In
Today's Tequila Treehouse...
|
Order Signed Ed Hardy Books from Kerouac.com
Quotes
"Robert Byrd has been around a very long time,
and his many decades of service have made
West Virginia a wonderful state in
which to manufacture methamphetamine or frame the locals for murder.
But it's time for Senator to do the
right thing, and expire. Even a nice coma would do."
-- Confederate Handjob,
Link
There's one clear difference between the two parties.
The Democrat would wish for their political enemies to retire.
But when somebody wants the guy on the other side of the aisle
f-ing dead,
we know you're dealing with a Rethug or a religiously insane
handjob - or both.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Glaciers
then (1940) and now
by Sweat Jesus can you please save us?
Excerpt:
The Chacaltaya glacier, 5,300m (17,400 ft) up
in the Andes, used to be the world's highest ski run.
But it has been reduced to just a few small pieces
of ice.
Many Bolivians depend on the melting of the glaciers
for their water supply during the dry season.
The team of Bolivian scientists started measuring
the Chacaltaya glacier in the 1990s. Not long ago they were predicting
that it would survive until 2015. But now it
seems, the glacier has melted at a much faster rate than they expected.
Photos taken in the last two weeks show that all
that is left of the majestic glacier, which is thought to be 18,000 years
old,
are a few lumps of ice near the top.
See how the glacier has retreated since 1940
Just 20 years ago skiers from all round
the world would travel to Chacaltaya
to say they had skied down the world's highest
ski run.
Butt, since Jim Inhofe rules the United States, and because the
Obama and the Democrats have refused
to come to work because they have no Bartcop in them, global warming
continues to be denied.
It's SO
EASY to rub the facts in the faces of the lying
sons of bitches,
why can't some elected Democrat gather the sac and finally stand up
and say it?
Earth's house is on fire, and the anti-science,
cloud-worshipping deniers say everything's OK!
If Democrats had ruled in the 1400's, globes would be illegal because
their troglodyte opponents
would say "Anybody with a lick of sense knows
the Earth is flat, " and that's that.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
So I get this e-mail Xmas card from Sarah Palin. sarah@sarahpacdonate.com
(I call it "x-mas" just to piss her off :)
First, it says "Paid for by PubHoPAC."
Really, sarah?
You billed your PAC for an e-mail you sent out?
Then, it says "Not authorized by any candidate or candidate's commitee."
Really, Sarah?
Why did you send an unauthorized e-mail to me?
Sarah, admit it - you're too damn stupid to be president.
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Subject: Your poker skills
What do you mean......they broke up your table.....the
only table you could win at?
What's the matter with you? Go win at another
table.
I got to know this table, I knew
who was real and who wasn't.
I was f-ing Nancy Grace - I could read their
minds after a while...
I got lucky and had someone who loves poker come
to Breckenridge this week.
16k later...your pal's way, he says uncle with
a lot of cursing. The funny thing is the last time
he and I played I got stuck about 10K and upped
the stakes and got down to a 2K loser
and he got pissed because I came back and he
quit before the agreed upon time deadline.
This time when he got stuck 2K, I said of course
I'll go along with a stake raise and play till whatever
time you want, because that's what you do when
you are a better poker player than your opponent
and a gentleman to boot. Maybe you lose
back what you won, but odds are, you break a piggy.
Let's have a festival in Breckenridge when pot's legal (after Jan. 1.)
Don't make too big a deal advertising what is
common knowledge because the local heat
feels like out of towners might get the wrong
impression....pot is legal...wait a minute...pot is
legal.
Frank
Frank, I look forward to it.
I got to smoke legal some pot in the Rockies in '09 and I want to do
it again.
The religiously-insane, pro-Jack Danilels crowd can't imagine a benign
high.
Why do drugs that don't make you want to beat your wife?
I can see it now...
A friendly game of small-ball poker,
a little live Shirley on the video,
a little Chinaco, maybe even the good stuff?
a little bit of some legal God's flowers...
Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit, I'd go to this even if I was broke.
Some people want to make this a ski-vacation too, so when should we
do it?
March? April?
When will there still be enough snow but unlikely to have a roads-closing
blizzard?
Sidebar:
I don't care if we get snowed in afterwards.
I know the answer to that, Bart! | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
I'll say it again.
If we're wrong, we squandered some money.
If oil-bought, religiously-insane Jim Inhofe is wrong,
his great-grandchildren might not die of natural causes.
Can you understand how frustrating it is to be
the dumbest guy in the room and always be right?
Presidential Puppets
I see Obama is reading some Christmas book to
some third graders.
Can't those kids read "Mt Pet Goat" without
the president?
This is such bullshit and it needs to stop.
If I was elected president (Good luck, America!)
when my mother hen ran in the room and said,
"Mr. President, on Tuesday you're reading
poems to some third graders," I'd say,
"Fuck
that."
I grew up Catholic and never once even had some mayor show up to talk to us.
Sidebar:
But I was once at a Catholic dinner in St Louis
where I met the real Col.f-ing Sanders from KFC.
So why is Obama taking the precious time he needs
to solve America's problems
by acting like Der Monkey Fuhrer messing with
some damn school kids?
I don't mean to damn the school kids, I damn the
process that pushed them into his day.
Thos kids would be better off if they never met
Obama because he was too busy saving America.
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Help Bartcop.com survive!
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PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155
Subject: Cruises to the North Pole
Bart,
That's genius!
It's just what is needed to raise awareness,
cruises to the North Pole.
Carnival or whoever can run it, but they may
even start a special line,
called Apocalypse for these kind of Enviro-holocost
tours.
Jonathan K
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Subject: is there global warming?
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Shopping online?
Use this Amazon
portal
and they'll send bartcop.com
pennies from each dollar.
Special offer from Amazon.com
Stephen King - Under the Dome
Just $14 That' s cheap for great terror
Breathless pacing and effortless characterization
are the hallmarks of King's best books,
and here the writing is immersive, the suspense
unrelenting.
The pages turn so fast you'll barely be able
to keep up.
Quotes
"Dear President Obama, Thanks for no help in
Maine, no real support for the public option,
hiring folks like Rahm Emanuel and
Jim Messina to push Congressional leaders to cave to
Joe Lieberman and Blue Dogs, and caving
on core Democratic initiatives of late, such as
re-importation of cheaper prescription
drugs. I am appreciative of the smaller initiatives you
have undertaken, but in 2010, please
stop throwing progressive allies under the bus and
screwing up major progressive initiatives.
As a holiday gift, I am enclosing a gift certificate
to a semester-long class on Negotiation
101. I hope you put it to good use."
-- Adam Bink, Link
In 2004, Kerry took out a mortage on his home to get the money
he needed to win Iowa.
Then he went wind surfing off Cape Cod for a month while the
Swiftboaters swayed public opinion.
In 2008, Obama's followers spread the lie that the Clintons were
racists to win Iowa.
A year later, he vacationed at Cape Cod for a month while the
Teabaggers swayed public opinion.
Why do Democrats start a fight and then go to sleep?
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Oklahoma's
Dingbat Delegation
by Richard Fricker
Excerpt:
If it's DeceIt is a curious day indeed when,
among Oklahoma’s Washington delegation, John Sullivan sounds sane.
Sens. Jim Inhofe and Tom Coburn have again displayed
their posteriors to the national press, bringing the nation’s
attention to bear on Oklahoma voters.
Sen. Coburn is attempting to stop health care
legislation by requesting that each senator be required to read each piece
of legislation offered for a vote and that each
item be read into the record in full. Coburn told a press conference he
asked for the reading because, “This reading
will provide a dose of transparency that has been lacking in this debate.”
The keyboard shudders when using “Coburn” and
“transparency” in the same sentence.
Democra
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Lefty Rage at Obama
Excerpt:
I've been trying not to write an article every
other week about all the things I don't like about Obama.
But the little prick is making it very hard.
Did this clown really say on national television
that "I did not run for office to be helping out
a bunch of you know, fat cat bankers on Wall
Street"?!?!
Really, Barack?
So, why the hell did you help out a bunch of
fat cat bankers on Wall Street?!?!
Are you going to tell us that "I did not run for
office to be shovel-feeding the military-industrial complex"?
But what - they're just so darned pushy?
"...I did not run for office to continue George
Bush's valiant effort at shredding the Bill of Rights.
It's just that those government-limiting rules
are so darned pesky."
"...I did not run for office to dump a ton of
taxpayer money into the coffers of health insurance companies.
It's just that they asked so nicely."
"...I did not run for office to block equality
for gay Americans.
I just never got around to doing anything about
it."
I wish Obama could recognize there's a problem here.
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Subject: legal flowers
Hey Bart,
Your legal flowers comment set me to reminiscing.
Back in the 70s I was visiting Ann Arbor, Michigan,
from Beantown (actually, I was selling a passel of Thai sticks,
but that's another story), and couldn't resist
approaching a cop on the sidewalk, blowing some sweet, oily smoke
in his direction, and requesting a citation.
He seemed reluctant, but I told him how much I'd
enjoy showing the ticket to my friends back home,
so he wrote me up for a $5 fine. He was a good
sport, because he knew I'd never pay it.
Those were the days. Mayhap such happy days are
here again...
A happy holiday season to you and Mrs. Bart and
the kitties,
and may the new year treat us all at least a
little more kindly.
Bob in Prague
Bob, come see us in Colorado :)
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Subject: Bartcop Helps Tiger and Conan
I like Conan O'Brien, but I think Bartcop is waaay
funnier.
So, NBC should hire Bartcop to write for Conan.
You have been right on in your assessment of Tiger
Woods' current situation,
and even after years of the BartHex you've been
very fair to him.
You've been sticking to the facts and offering
your best advice, which I think he should take.
Robert C
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Marty's
has new stuff every day
on her
tons-of-fun Entertainment Page
Marty
always has good stuff.
Question
Why does Chris Matthews call Evil Dick "Cheeney?"
I was watching him the other day and not only does he mispronounce his
name,
but he asked why everyone in the country pronounced Evil Dick's name
incorrectly.
Hey Tweety, as much as I dislike Cheney,
I believe he's smart enough to know how to pronounve his own f-ing
name.
Are you ...like, stupid?
"Maybe,
or maybe
I'm a whore. Haaa!"
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Howard Dean:
"It's not fair"
by Joe Conason
Excerpt:
Howard Dean proved long ago that he marches to
the beat of his own conscience and
he remains unswerving in his opposition to the
Senate Democrats' healthcare bill.
What irks him the most in the current bill, he
said, is that it permits insurance companies to charge as much as
300 percent more to some customers than others.
So even though they must provide coverage to anyone who
applies -- known as "guaranteed issue" -- the
price differential that can be charged to older or sicker customers
virtually erases that promise.
"If you have to pay $20,000 a year for insurance,
what good does it do if you have guaranteed issue?" he asked.
'Which is in fact what you'd have to pay if they
can charge you three times as much as they do ordinary people.
They have 300 percent rate differences in that
bill.'"
On a crazy-complicated issue like health care
reform, I trust the top Democrats because
I don't have the time to get into something like
that - but can we trust this health care bill?
Obama hasn't lifted a finger to get what he wants,
so whose health care bill is this?
Harry Reid's?
Kissyface the traitor's?
Mitch the Bitch McConnell's?
This time, there's nobody to trust.
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Black only, comes in all sizes.
Top quality, yada, yada, yada.
$24
we'll pay shipping in the US
We take credit cards, too
Return!
Two
for just $10
I'm not that upset with Obama, I just have a
bunch of these left over from the Bush error.
PayPal to bartcop@bartcop.com
and be sure to Tell
us what size
or send a check to
bartcop.com
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155
Quotes
"Dick Cheney is one of the most devious, unpatriotic,
self serving, slimy, parasitic
war profiteering scumbags in American
history to ever hold a major public office.
When it comes to America he has "other
priorities"...himself."
-- flavorino, Link
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We're on Twitter
Look for bartcop
Note: If you sign up,
you'll get an instant Twitter alert when
a new page or radio show is fresh and hot.
Super Mario
Wii
$51
w/
free shipping
Developers at Nintendo have dreamed of creating
a simultaneous multiplayer Super Mario Bros. game for decades.
The Wii console finally makes that dream come
true for everyone with New Super Mario Bros. Wii.
Supporting 2-4 players in side-scrolling co-op
and competitive platforming action, and featuring a mix
of fan favorites and new characters, new powerups
and various input options via the Wii Remote,
it is destined to become an instant classic
in one of the most beloved game franchises of all-time.
Quotes
"That's the first thing I think when important
issues occur..."What would Sarah do?"
A pox on John Mccain for giving this
no-one a voice."
-- ender
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http://www.cafepress.com/bartstore
Subject: What a week!
Bart,
After a brutal fight of several weeks, Co- President
Lieberman and Vice President Ben Nelson announced their
version of a health care reform bill. This
struggle, which effectively neutered Progressives and muzzled moderates,
finally came to an end. Both Lieberman and Nelson
are happy with the bill, as are the insurance companies they represent.
In the end, these two got everything they wanted.
Yes, it meant they had to make Co-President Obama look a
little weak and passive, and gave the hint that
it might be Rahm Emanuel who was pulling the strings in this fight.
President Obama however claims to be happy
with the progress made. He was losing sleep over the prospect o
f not having any bill at all to sign.
To the relief of almost all, those that were for
a different version of a bill in the beginning, one with a public option,
medicare buy-in, with no abortion restrictions,
( just to name a few), have fallen in line and have changed their tunes.
Let the platitudes begin.
(Many in fact, will need to use their own health
care, to repair their arms that were twisted up and back, very hard).
So next up......reconcile the House & Senate
bills.
However Nelson says f any changes are made-he
like HIS version- he'll object.
It's not your father's Democratic party anymore........
God help us, because the Democrats sure can't.
Mary Lou
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Why subscribe?
There are 160
shows online to listen to
and more are coming
That's a lot of BCR
You can select a monthly plan to provide recurring support.
Please sign up for whatever you can afford.
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Tulsa, OK 74155
New specials every day till Christmas!
Evil Russell robbed on Survivor
Excerpt:
I wouldn't want to go up against Russell Hantz.
In "Survivor's" nineteen seasons,
Russell was the very first contestant not to
wait for clues to find the immunity idol.
Noooo, not Russell.
With Russell it was "Game ON" from the get-go. Probably in the airport for the flight over.
Once on the island, Russell immediately started
looking for the immunity idols.
And he found them too. Yes, plural.
No one had ever done that before.
But Russell didn't win the game.
The jury voted for the dishrag girl who never
did anything to win.
Some say it was a karmic payback for how he lied
and cheated
...in a game where lying and cheating is part
of the game.
Survivor is like poker (everything is, actually.)
You're supposed to stab your friends in the back, but some people don't
get that.
One idiot even said, "I'd rather lose the million dollars than break my word."
Really?
It's not like Tiger vowing to stay true to his wife - it's a damn game
on TV.
The guy who scored all the touchdowns didn't win because the losers
were jealous,
so they gave the million to a weak player who sat on the bench the
entire game - weird.
But viewers voted Russell into $100K, so things could be worse.
...but I know you'd admit to voting for Bush
sooner than admit you watched this show - and that's OK.
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Y o u r
A d
H e r e
Still the best advertising bargain on the Net
Banner ads by the day,
by the week,
or by the month
Rethug raped his daughters
"Do I look guilty to you?"
Excerpt:
Former South Dakota lawmaker Ted Klaudt does
not like all of the stories being written about him.
Most politicians are delighted with coverage
but Klaudt is best known for raping his foster daughters.
Klaudt’s solution (after failing to prove innocence)
was to copyright his name and demand that newspapers
ask his permission to use his name 20 days before
any article or face millions in penalties for unauthorized use.
It is a clever idea that only lacks a basis in
the law to work. You cannot copyright your name in this way.
You can make your name a trademark but only for
business and services — not journalistic stories.
There are few people who would want to infringe
on the trademark name of Ted Klaudt.
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Check out the toons and stuff
on the Bart Blog!
Subject: Donation
Love ya', bro. Merry Koreshmas.
Philip on Cockle Hill Rd
Philip, that was cool. Thanks for that
and a Merry Koreshmas to you, too.
or send a "Love" check to
bartcop.com
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155
Stacy Keibler on HIMYM
See tons of fully-clothed Stacy Keibler pictures at BC Hotties
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