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American Politics Journal Atrios Barry Crimmins Betty Bowers Buzzflash Consortium News Daily Howler Daily Kos Democatic Underground Disinfotainment Today Evil GOP Bastards Faux News Channel Greg Palast The Hollywood Liberal Internet Weekly Jesus General Joe Conason Josh Marshall Liberal Oasis Make Them Accountable Mark Morford Mike Malloy Political Humor - About.com Political Wire Randi Rhodes Rude Pundit Smirking Chimp Take Back the Media Whitehouse.org More Links |
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 EXTRA:
Benny the Rat's smoking gun
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Friday April 9, 2010 Vol 2504 - Church of Serial Rapes
Alaska by Alistair  Quote of the Day "There are 13 year olds who are
A year from today, will there
|
In
Today's Tequila Treehouse...
|
Quotes
"If McCain wants to re-imagine the 2008 presidential
campaign, fine. But if you are planning
to deny that you ever thought of yourself
as a maverick, it would be better not to have subtitled
one of your memoirs 'The Education
of an American Maverick.' ”
-- Gail Collins, Link
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Will Obama
act like a man?
Justice
Stevens to retire this summer
Already, the snarling dogs are DEMANDING that Obama appoint somebody
THEY
like.
In the past, Obama has bent over for them every time and I'm so tired
of the surrenders.
His premier goal seems to be to get the snarling dogs to like him,
which
will never happen.
The sooner he understands that, the sooner he can become a great president.
Bush appointed the two most radical (and young) handjobs he could find.
When he did, the Dems ALL said, "He should
get whoever he wants."
Now the shoe is on the oither foot and I expect Obama to dave in to
their demands.
No matter who he appoints, the snarling dogs will say,
"He's the most radical Stalinist in America,"
so why should Obama even try to make the sons of bitches happy?
Of course, the proper answer to their demands is, "Go
fuck yourself,
I won the elecion and, just like Bush, I'll
appoint whoever I f-ing want,"
but Obama's primary goal is to be liked by the snarling dogs.
How do you get into politics if your primary goal is to placate the
snarling dogs?
Obama has shown no hesitation to piss off his base so expect to be
disappointed.
These are the bastards Obama's trying to win over:
Why does Obama try to make the snarling dogs happy? At our
expense?
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Benny the
Rat is the Perfect Pope
by Richard Dawkins
Excerpt:
"Should the pope resign?"
No. As the College of Cardinals must have recognized
when they elected him, he is perfectly - ideally
- qualified to lead the Roman Catholic Church.
A leering old villain in a frock, who spent decades
conspiring behind closed doors for the position
he now holds; a man who believes he is infallible and
acts the part; a man whose preaching of scientific
falsehood is responsible for the deaths of countless
AIDS victims in Africa; a man whose first instinct
when his priests are caught with their pants down is
to cover up the scandal and damn the young victims
to silence: in short, exactly the right man for the job.
He should not resign, moreover, because he is
perfectly positioned to accelerate the downfall of the evil,
corrupt organization whose character he fits
like a glove, and of which he is the absolute and historically
appropriate monarch.
No, Pope Ratzinger should not resign. He should
remain in charge of the whole rotten edifice - the whole
profiteering, woman-fearing, guilt-gorging, truth-hating,
child-raping institution - while it tumbles, amid a
stench of incense and a rain of tourist-kitsch
sacred hearts and preposterously crowned virgins.
For the first time - I think I'm in love with a man.
A shot of Chinaco is the least I can offer this great writer
- 
I ask again:
A year from today, will there still be a Church of Serial Rapes?
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Subject: Cindy looking for a place to escape?
Lots of people have opinions...
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Quotes
"What can you say about Palin and Bachmann
that hasn't already been said
about Leopold
and Loeb? They're like the Lucy and Ethel of the lunatic fringe."
-- Joy Behar on CNN,
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
We need a new Bartcop bumper sticker.
Any design
guys/gals out there?
Can you make it printer-ready for the sticker people?
We should probably do a two-color design - what do you think?
Let's do a contest - thru May 1.
The best sticker art becomes the new flagship for bartcop.com
There's a "valuable" prize for the winner!
I do great art work, Bart - Glad to help! | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Separated at birth?
Benny the Rat and Emperor Palpatine
Thanks to Steve B
Marty's
has new stuff every day
on her
fine, fine Entertainment Page
Marty always has good stuff.
Pope: 'Acceptable Levels'
Excerpt:
Calling the behavior shameful, sinful, and much
more frequent than the Vatican was comfortable with,
Benny the Rat vowed to bring the pedophilia in
the Catholic Church down to a more manageable level.
On Easter Sunday, the pontiff offered his "most
humble apologies" to abuse victims, and pledged to
reduce the total number of molestations by 60
percent over the next five years.
"This is absolutely unacceptable," The Rat said.
"It seems a weakening of faith in God has prevented
our priests from exercising moderation when sexually
abusing helpless minors."
Reducing child rapes to 60 percent of current
levels would be a good start, Benny.
I ask again:
A year from today, will there still be a Church of Serial Rapes?
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Help Bartcop.com survive!
OR send a 'love' check to
bartcop.com
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155
Wis. DA
Threatens Teachers
Says he'll arrest them if they obey the law
Excerpt:
A Wisconsin district attorney is urging schools
to drop their sex-education programs, warning that
the teachers involved could be arrested if they
follow a new state law requiring them to instruct students
on how to use condoms and other contraceptives.
God forbid these kids learn how to prevent pregnancy.
In light of a letter from Juneau County District
Attorney Scott Southworth, (R-Teabagger), leaders at the
five school districts in the county are evaluating
what to do now, says School Superintendent Tom Andres.
"I don't intend to put our teachers in harm's
way," he said. "We were just about to meet to discuss how to
comply with the new law. Then this letter came,
and this is another piece of the puzzle that we'll have to
consider as we figure out how to move forward."
The state law, called the Healthy Youth Act, took
effect in March. Starting this fall, it requires schools
with sex-education courses to teach students
medically accurate, age-appropriate information, including
how to use birth control and prevent sexually
transmitted diseases. It also requires the classes to include
information about how to recognize signs of abuse
and how alcohol can affect decision making.
Oh no, we can't let these kids learn about life!
We need to keep them stupid and ignorant so they'll
turn out like their parents!
Somebody needs to tell Threat Boy to go fuck himself.
What's he going to arrest them for? Obeying
the damn law?
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Quotes
"I need your help. I have a lot of people who
are after me."
-- Harry Reid, begging for help
like a 9-year old girl, Link
Harry, why can't you retire like a man?
If Nevada is tired of you, then take the hint and go away.
Too bad you didn't have a spine - you could've been a great statesman.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Subject: Hey Bart - I figured it out...
Hi Bart,
I think the problem with pederastic priests is
this: They do not believe that sex with boys is actually sex!
It works like this: Priests must
be celibate. To the Church this means “no sex with women”, nothing
else.
So, non-procreative sex, i.e. homosexuality,
isn’t really sex, so priests are free to engage in it. In fact, this
may be encouraged!
The proof of this, IMHO, is that there are few
cases of priests raping young girls, just boys.
How does one correct this? Remove the celibacy
requirement!
Oh, but that would probably mean that priests
would then rape little girls too!
Just sayin’…
Nelson
Dude, you might be onto something.
There's that old joke, "I'm
not gay - HE was blowing ME."
Maybe that's how those priests think, but either
way,
they "know"
God is watching them as they molest those kids
and they do it anyway.
Same for Benny the Rat - he covered up their crimes,
knowing that God was watching him do it every
time.
To me, that's proof they know there is no God.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Teabaggers in the Fifties...
Teabaggers in the Fifties...
Not much difference...
Stupak runs
from Teabaggers
You can tell he's a coward - he's a Democrat
Excerpt:
Congressman Bart Stupak of Michigan says he's
retiring this year because (insert whatever
lie you'd like here.)
Stupak said he made the decision within the last
36 hours not to seek a 10th term. He says he felt his main
legislative goal — fucking up Obama's health
care bill — was accomplished.
The 58-year-old women-are-stupid Democrat
had been targeted for defeat by inbred, racist teabaggers
for his crucial role in fucking up Obama's health
care bill
Stupak says he could have won re-election. He
insists he wasn't being chased from the race by the teabaggers,
who are holding rallies this week in his northern
Michigan district calling for his ouster
What a coward - go ahead and leave.
We already have too many gutless cowards in our party.
Maybe a Democrat with the balls to back his president will take your
place.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Del Castillo in Germany
Rick Del
Castillo - has ax, will travel...
Lido
Berlin, DE Thu Apr 15 10
Die Werkstatt Cologne, DE
Fri Apr 16 10
All you Germans - go see Del Castillo.
Tell the guitar players that Bart says hey
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Memphis
priest-rapist reassigned
That way he can rape again and again
Excerpt:
When Father Duran arrived in Memphis in 1999,
the Spanish-speaking Dominican priest provided a much-needed
addition to the Catholic Diocese of Memphis.
His duties were to minister to Hispanics at the Church of the Ascension.
It appeared to be a match made in heaven.
"We desperately needed someone to work with our
Hispanic community," Bishop J. Terry Steib said in a
deposition recounting talks with the Dominican
Order. "And the candidate they had was Juan Carlos Duran."
The Memphis Diocese did little to examine his
background and learned too late that Duran was a raping dog.
I just remember him asking, 'Please, please, let
me give you oral sex,' stuff like that," said a 14-year-old boy
in a sex abuse lawsuit filed against the diocese.
"I can't remember the exact number of occasions, but it was multiple."
The "John Doe" case prompted local media to file
suit to gain access to court documents related to that case.
The documents show that at least 15 priests
have been accused of sexual misconduct over four decades
in Memphis. Some had been accused of sexual abuse
elsewhere and had been moved from one diocese to another."
Really?
The Church of Organized Serial Rapes does that?
Who knew?
I ask again:
A year from today, will the Church of Serial Rapes still exist?
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
ha ha
Subject: You know the phrase "I'd hit it?"
Maybe Benny the Rat is a member of the "hit 'yer
youth."
Steamer
Dude, that was so bad it was good.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Quotes
"Someone had better tell Washington that that
pink elephant is on the move,
and Michele Bachmann (R-Batshit)
is leading the stampede."
-- Sarah the Publicity Whore, Link
"Palin poses as a 'real American' from the
heartland, yet she has done everything in her power
to escape that heartland and find refuge
in celebrity...Whatever else Palin is, she is not authentic.
If anyone is phony in American culture,
it is Sarah Palin."
-- Andrew 'Trifecta" Sullivan, Link
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Subject: RE: Fun times for Democrats
It is truly amazing.
The Thugs are handing the next three elections
to the Dems,
yet the Democrats STILL don’t have the balls
to take it.
If I could reach through that screen we’d drink
that whole damn bottle!
John the carpenter
I swear, when I was in sixth grade I could out-argue
today's Democrats.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
So, Obama
is an idiot?
Go on Jeopardy with him.
I'll spot you $5,000 and we'll wager $1,000
that Obama out-scores your racist, teabagging ass.
Subject: If the south wants to secede - go for it
Right wing Republicans and Tea Party extremists
are talking about seceding from the United States.
I say - go for it. Governors like Rick Perry
of Texas and Bob McDonald of Virginia want to inflame
the hatred of America then they should leave
and form their own country.
The southern Republican leaning states are the
high welfare states and the progressive north is stuck supporting them.
I would love to see them pay their own way and
they can take the Bush debt with them. They can deregulate everything
and pay for their own bailouts. I for one am
tired of putting up with the bad judgment of the politicians they elect.
Maybe if they had to take care of themselves
they they would understand that taking responsibility and fixing problems
is more work that anger, apathy, and ignorance.
But here in "Real America" we had an election.
We won, you lost. Get used to it.
Marc Perkel
My blog: http://marc.perkel.com
Founder of the Church of Reality
http://www.churchofreality.org
Reality changed my life. It can change your life
too.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Why subscribe or donate?
If you're a subscriber or donator
you'll find the jokes funnier
and the stories more interesting.
Besides, there are 162
radio shows online
and many more are coming
That's a lot of BCR
You can select a monthly plan to provide recurring support.
Please sign up for whatever you can afford.
(10% of your gross is the usual tithe :)
OR send a 'love' check to
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PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155
Quotes
"I get the real political news from Glenn Beck."
-- Christine the Teabagging Sheep,
Link
"I could give a flying crap about the political
process.
We’re an entertainment company."
-- Glenn Beck, Link
No, you're a stealing-from-the-stupid company.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Subject: Can you believe...
Sir Bart that we here in nutz Arizonaee still
have to put up with this tool? Maverick my ass!
He has and will always be a carpetbagger, right
wing crazy guy.
Hey I was here before McSame came to Arizona,
WTF? I never voted for him.
Now just look at the bat crazy old hag we now
have as caretaker governor, Brewer.
That crazy old bitch is spending $15,000,000
to attempt to sue over ObamaCare.
Hell,the state of AZ is still in the hole to
the tune of several BILLIONS of dollars and now
they want to spend tax money they don't have,
that's just nutz! She told the f**ktards in the
AZ legistature to over ride the democrat AG (Goddard)
who told her that it's a waste of tax dollars.
Since we also have a repuke controlled legislature
they naturally abliged.
Don't even get me started with the other rethug from AZ in the Senate, Kyl. FUBAR is the state of Arizona.
…and they want the voters to pass a 1 cent sales
tax in a special election in May
so they can give the rich a backdoor tax cut.
I'm voting NO on prop 100.
Stellar Job!
John E. P.
Plus you have that Sheriff Arpaio to worry about.
He gets off on putting mad-dog killers in pink
underwear.
One day they'll get lose - I wouldn't want to
be him.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Climate change may trigger earthquakes and volcanoes
I wasn't wanting to get deep into this, I was just making the point
that I'm old
and I don't remember reading about an earthquake per week as I was
growing up.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Subject: Leno's audience are idiots
Bart, Leno's audience are primarily idiots who
will laugh at anything he throws their way,
whereas Letterman's audience has a functioning
brain.
Leno is still on the air for the same reason people
like the "Blue Collar Comedy Tour" and Fox Noise
- they're idiots! Leno proved this during
the Dumbya administration, all he did was kiss ass with
right wing guests, while Letterman was more critical
of them (see his questioning of Bill O'Reilly for that).
All Leno does is kiss ass. We can only hope that
people will wise up to more intelligent comedy,
such as David Cross, Bill Maher, Kathy Griffin
and Letterman. But you never know.
Keep Swinging the Biggest Hammer in All of the
Known Universe, Bart!
George M
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Still the best advertising bargain on the Net
Banner ads by the day,
by the week,
or by the month
Quotes
"Palin and her moronic fans believe that Fox
is the only "news" channel that is "fair and balanced"
when Fox is as "fair and balanced"
as Rush and Ann Coulter sitting on opposite ends of a see-saw."
ha
ha
-- Bizarrobrain, Link
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Why the
new Tiger Ad will backfire
His dead father is the star...
Excerpt:
A new ad that uses the voice of Earl Woods isn’t
just provocative—it’s a creepy piece of contemptible propaganda.
The latest from Nike and Tiger Woods, dropped
into rotation on ESPN and the Golf Channel just in time for his
ballyhooed return to golf at the Masters, is
not an ad. It’s a provocation. A collaboration between a multi-billion
dollar
conglomerate, a man who just got out of sex rehab
and the voice of a dead man who, when he prowled amongst the
living, probably could have used a bit of counseling
if not rehab himself.
But why would Tiger Woods the wanna-be human green-light
it?
Why would he choose to let us know the inner
workings of his troubled soul via a :30 second piece
communications that at best is branding and at
worst is insensitive propaganda?
Tiger likes to perpetuate the myth of Earl Woods
almost as much as his own, but this commercial,
which many have already called poignant and moving,
isn’t just odd, it’s creepy.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Update - Clarification
The story was true, except for the part about the guy surviving the crash.
Weirdest part?
This poor guy's name was Brandon.
Five days after Brandon died, a friend who had attended Brandon's funeral
died in a similar (!) motorcycle accident on the same Highway 169.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
Subject: medical costs in Europe
Hi bart,
Long time reader here in ireland and have been
fascinated by the debate on healthcare over there in America
Just thought you would be interested in this
story about a pair of Irish conjoined twins that were separated in
london today and the cost to the parents
of this 14 hour operation with a team of 20 doctors and nurses.
NOTHING
Yes, FREE because of our dastardly socialist healthcare
systems here in Europe.
finbarr
Finbarr, thanks for that.
In America a typical familiy would lose their
home after an operation like that.
In America, we'd rather be homeless than socialist.
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
When it's Jon Stewart vs the Pope,
bet on the Jew, not the Catholic
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Quotes
"It took longer for the iPad to come out than
it did Ricky Martin."
-- Letterman
Send e-mail to Bart | Discuss it on The BartCop Forum | Comment on it at the BartBlog!
That poor kid's going to grow up and find out
he's the most high-profile mistake in recent history.
Subject: Crazy Michelle (R-Batshit)
>We are going to elect the boldest, strongest,
most courageous, rock-ribbed
> constitutional conservative president
this country's ever seen! We're there!"
> -- Michelle Bachmann
Where are they going to find this
kind of a republican?
I've been around for a very long time, and have
yet to see a
Thug with even one of these qualifications she's
dreaming about.
These people have completely lost it!!!
Marian in MO
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you'll get an instant Twitter alert when
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Check out the toons and stuff
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Subject: Donation
Bart, I will donate up to $1,000 to match donations
made to you between now and Tax Day, April 15th.
Sally who got a refund
Sally, that's very nice of you.
Subject: Donation
Bart, Making the pie twice as high before April
15th,
Mike R in Louisville, CO
Mike, thanks for that doubled donation.
or send a "Love" check to
bartcop.com
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 74155
Katie Holmes
wears Uggs
Will that poor girl ever escape the cult?
See dozens of hot and hotter Katie Holmes images at BC Hotties
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