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Thurs-Friday Jan 17-18, 2013 Vol 3000 - Scamtastic
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In
Today's Tequila Treehouse...
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ha ha
Quotes
"For those of us who think few things are more fun than watching conservatives
lose their shit over something, yesterday was like Christmas, New Year's, and
St. Blowjob's Day all rolled into one. When Obama took to the podium to talk
gun control, the right wing lost enough shit to fertilize all the rice paddies in China."
-- Rude Pundit, Link
Send e-mail to Bart
Yes to Katrina, No to Sandy
Teabaggers want The Un-United States
Link
The hypocrisy of House Republicans was on full display Tuesday, when Congress finally
passed $51 billion in Hurricane Sandy relief that they should have passed months agos.
But instead, 179 Republicans decided that emergency disaster relief must be offset by spending cuts.
Funny how tax cuts for the rich never needed any "offsets."
But many of the Republicans who fucked New York, New Jersey and Connecticut on Sandy
voted for disaster relief when Katrina hit. Mother Nature doesn’t choose between blue states
and red states, but Teabaggers do.
The worst offender was Rep. Mick Mulvaney (R-Bagger), whose proposal to cut $20.4 billion
to offset Sandy relief was rejected. Mulvaney wasn’t in office for Katrina, but he did accept
a federal disaster relief loan 15 years ago.
We should win every national election by 30 points.
The fact that sometimes it's close (or they actualy win) should be shaming moments for
all Democrats if they can't even beat the most vile and despicable people in the country.
It's like barely beating Jerry Sandusky for a job with the Boy Scouts.
Send e-mail to Bart
Shop
Online
Amazon.com sells everything
Someone bought an Energy 5.1 Home Theater System
for $399 (cheap!) so Amazon donated $15 to the Treehouse!
I think everyone needs a office in their home.
Thanks for using this link
Amazon.com sells everything
Find
your purchase
then come
back here
and use this link
and they'll throw the Treehouse some pennies...
Amazon
business has been slower than
usual.
I hope things pick up
between
now and Christmas
because Amazon has become my
financial lifeline.
Extra thanks to those of
you
who
use the Bartcop.com Amazon Portal.
Someone bought an Energy 5.1 Home Theater System
for $399 (cheap!) so Amazon donated $15 to the Treehouse!
I think everyone needs a office in their home.
Thanks for using this link
Buy
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Lance Spills His Yellow Guts
Oprah groveling Interview Tonight
Link
All the speculation is about to end. In a matter of hours, viewers can judge whether
Lance Armstrong told Oprah the truth this time.
Armstrong's humiliating confession will be televised at 9 p.m. Thursday. Since word
of his confession was leaked by The Whore AP, there has been no shortage of opinions
or advice on what Armstrong should say.
For others who will tune in Thursday, it's not just what Armstrong said that matters.
How he said it, whether angry, tearful or matter-of-fact, will be judged as well.
''I left it all on the table with her and when it airs the people can decide,'' Armstrong said.
Lance, who's advising you right now, Dina f-ing Lohan?
Why did you turn coward and offer to turn narc?
I haven't dug deep, but I still haven't seen an answer to this question:
How can they ban a drug for which they had no test?
It's like banning prayer - it can't be done so why even try?
If Lance hadn't confessed like a jailhouse bitch, he would always have backers.
His position should be, "I passed every test you gave me, so blow me."
Reminder: To my knowledge, cheating on a bicycle drug test isn't a crime.
Hell, it's not even a blowjob. His "crime" was outwitting the testers and
they're embarassed by their incompetence.
Sidebar: Remember that 60 Minutes and CBS News have been pushing this "scandal"
like the New York Whore Times pushed that very dangerous Whitewater "scandal."
Scott Pelley got an "exclusive" interview with one of the faceless teammates that history
never got around to naming and CBS pushed it like it was an interview with Deep Throat.
Final Word: "Lance Armstrong's foundation raised more than $500 million to
support cancer survivors and served 2.5 million people affected by the disease." Link
...and STILL he became someone who had to be taken down.
Send e-mail to Bart
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Obama to nominate Jones for ATF
Link
A federal prosecutor who worked to get the most violent criminals off the streets is expected
to be named director of the U.S. Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives.
Obama will nominate B. Todd Jones to lead the ATF, which hasn't had a permanent director since 2006.
Jones is U.S. Attorney for Minnesota and has been ATF's acting director since late 2011.
Jones' nomination must be confirmed by the Senate.
The ATF hasn't had a director since 2006, when Sen Sensenbrenner slipped a paragraph
into the Patriot Act that said the ATF director MUST be approved by the senate, which meant
the ATF would never have any enforcement balls because the NRA-owned senate had veto power.
And Obama can't even shame the bastards for gutting the ATF because our pink tutu Democrats
sat right there and agreed when the snarling dogs
green-lit another 100M guns for the streets and less law enforcement.
How did I get stuck in a party of pants-wetting surrender monkeys?
Send e-mail to Bart
Subject: Republican Motivational Speaker
As the Republicans begin their retreat this weekend they will have the opportunity to be lead
by motivational speaker Erik Weihenmayer, an athlete perhaps best known for being the first
blind person to climb to the summit of Mount Everest. And although it is commendable that
the Republicans are embracing this accomplished speaker, isn't this just another case with
Republicans of the blind leading the blind? Think about it.
Marc Perkel
But that's not enough for the crazies.
They want state-enforced prayer,
like Iran and Saudi Arabia has.
Today's Sarah Palin Nude Photo
Link
Send e-mail to Bart
Subject: GOPer weed lies
It could be she is just a cynical liar, doing the usual hippie bashing to make her owners happy.
Or as the Bart says, she could be "religiously insane" which may someday be in the psychiatric handbook.
After all. if you'll believe in the Giant Bloodthirsty Patriarch in the sky, you're pretty much scared stupid.
If I was her Doc, I'd prescribe some Cannabis.
Mutt50
If she was at a party and suddenly needed a ride to the emergency room,
I wonder if Liar Gal would rather get a ride from a high driver or a drunk driver?
Someone else pointed out that pot stays in your system for 30-60 days
so it would figure pot might show up a lot in a drug test but legal drugs
like the murdering Oxycotin leaves no trace after 24 hours or so.
Click "Add Support" at the bottom right
Director Kathryn Bigelow is once again responding to the criticism leveled at her
for the depiction of torture in her Oscar-nominated film, "Zero Dark Thirty."
In a piece she wrote for the LA Times, Bigelow defended her use of the torture scenes
saying, "Those of us who work in the arts know that depiction is not endorsement."
"Indeed, I'm very proud to be part of a Hollywood community that has made searing
war films part of its cinematic tradition," she wrote. "Clearly, none of those films would
have been possible if directors from other eras had shied away from depicting the harsh
realities of combat."
Ed Asner, Martin Sheen and other Hollywood actors have waged an anti-Oscar campaign
against "Zero Dark Thirty," to which Amy Pascal at Sony Pictures sharply responded,
"To punish an artist's right of expression is abhorrent."
The film received an Oscar nomination, but Bigelow, 61, was surprisingly snubbed
for a best director Oscar.
In her Times piece, Bigelow stated her personal belief on torture: "As a lifelong pacifist,
I support all protests against the use of torture, and, quite simply, inhumane treatment of any kind."
She added, "But I do wonder if some of the sentiments alternately expressed about
the film might be more appropriately directed at those who instituted and ordered
these U.S. policies, as opposed to a motion picture that brings the story to the screen."
What's going on here?
Is Bigelow in trouble for making torture seem like a bad thing?
I assume the problem here is shit reporting, because why would Asner and Sheen
have a problem with torture being shown in a graphic manner? Is the reporter claiming
Hollywood wanted candy-coated torture scenes? Why would they want that?
If a studio did a film about WWII, is that an endorsement of Hitler?
In that last paragraph, Bigelow seems to plead with Hollywood
not to hate her for telling the truth, so I ask again, what's going on here?
Send e-mail to Bart
All we have to do is list the facts and we win.
Subject: fund-raising with art
Bart,
If you want to sell any cartoon that you have run on the site, I will send them an autographed original.
Wolf
Wolf, thanks - that's a lot of toons.
Here are four of Wolf's latest toons.
So, what would you bid for this Wolf Grulkey original art?
Send your bid for art to Bart
Marty's
Entertainment Page
has new stuff every day
Marty's TV Listings are the best!
has new stuff every day
Marty's TV Listings are the best!
Marty
always has good stuff.
Bartcop's Computer Repair
We can fix your computer
We do the repairs magically, over the Net.
We can fix your computer
We do the repairs magically, over the Net.
Kelly Ripa Admits Doping
Will she be shunned like Lance?
Link
Kelly Ripa doesn't just look flawless every morning on Live. She also looks flawless
after a serious spin class workout! Her secret: Botox.
She told Elle magazine that she gets occasional shots of Botox in her armpits to help
her avoid sweating. But it's not just Ripa's pits that get spruced up.
"Every seven months or so my eyelid skin rests on my eyelashes," Ripa said.
"So I feel like it makes my makeup artist's life easier, and it makes my eyes
look a little more open on TV, which is where I happen to work right now."
Send e-mail to Bart
He tripled the debt, but...he was White, so it's OK.
Today's Mystery Car
Link
Subject: last issue's Mystery Car Link
Bart that’s a 1941 Chrysler Thunderbolt.
It only had one seat because the entire rear area behind the front seat was used
to house the retractable hardtop. This was a concept not seen in a production car
until the the late fifties (57 I think) when Ford introduced its Skyliner.
One sold a few years ago at auction for $900K so somebody likes them.
Tom B
Will she be shunned like Lance?
Link
Kelly Ripa doesn't just look flawless every morning on Live. She also looks flawless
after a serious spin class workout! Her secret: Botox.
She told Elle magazine that she gets occasional shots of Botox in her armpits to help
her avoid sweating. But it's not just Ripa's pits that get spruced up.
"Every seven months or so my eyelid skin rests on my eyelashes," Ripa said.
"So I feel like it makes my makeup artist's life easier, and it makes my eyes
look a little more open on TV, which is where I happen to work right now."
Send e-mail to Bart
He tripled the debt, but...he was White, so it's OK.
Today's Mystery Car
Link
Subject: last issue's Mystery Car Link
Bart that’s a 1941 Chrysler Thunderbolt.
It only had one seat because the entire rear area behind the front seat was used
to house the retractable hardtop. This was a concept not seen in a production car
until the the late fifties (57 I think) when Ford introduced its Skyliner.
One sold a few years ago at auction for $900K so somebody likes them.
Tom B
Know Your Classics
Link
Subject: last issue's Classic Link
Hi Bart, I believe that line is from "On the Beach" by Nevil Shute.
Alan in New Mexico
Alan, you are correct!
I'm running out of Classic lines.
Anybody want to send me some more?
Send Classic Lines to Bart
Send e-mail to Bart
Know your Supermodels
Link
Subject: Last issue's supermodel Link
Yesterday's Supermodel remains unidentified.
Somebody has to know who she is...
Girl that hot can't remain unnoticed.
Send e-mail to Bart
Today's Wildlife Photo
Link
Send e-mail to Bart
Today's Mystery
Celebrity Photo
Link
Subject: last issue's Mystery Celebrity Link
Bart, that looks like Harrison Ford before he got rich and famous.
Steve in Utah
Subject: Issue 2998 Mystery Celebrity Link
Can't believe nobody got le Brigitte Bardot.
It's one of her early photos. Guess I'm showing my age.
70 years old 2 days ago.
rich in rio rancho
Rich, Happy Birthday.
Send e-mail to Bart
Link
Subject: last issue's Mystery Celebrity Link
Bart, that looks like Harrison Ford before he got rich and famous.
Steve in Utah
Subject: Issue 2998 Mystery Celebrity Link
Can't believe nobody got le Brigitte Bardot.
It's one of her early photos. Guess I'm showing my age.
70 years old 2 days ago.
rich in rio rancho
Rich, Happy Birthday.
Send e-mail to Bart
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Today's Mystery City
Link
Subject: last issue's Mystery City Link
Last issue's Mystery City was San Francisco with the Transamerica Pyramid
in the middle, seen from a pier the name or number of which I don't know.
Joe in Germany
Send e-mail to Bart
What is today's History Mystery?
Link
Subject: last issue's History Mystery Link
Bart, Bart, scrub a dub, that's Pablo Picasso in the tub.
Phil, Spokane
Subject: donation
Thanks to Patrick in Newport Beach.
Humor can get us thru the worst of times so we will keep on.
As my buddy Ray Coleman used to say, "Never quit!!"
Amazon.com is my best bet to staying on the InnerNets.
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Modern Family's Sofia Vergara
Check out over 600 sexy and tasteful photos of Sofia Vergara
More hot babes in BC Hotties
Thanks to Blue in Seattle for helping me corral the hotties...
Send Your Hottie Suggestion to Bart
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