POLITICS - HUMOR - FINE TEQUILA - TRAVEL - ENTERTAINMENT |
||||
|
|
||||
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
POLITICS - HUMOR - FINE TEQUILA - TRAVEL - ENTERTAINMENT |
||||
|
|
||||
|
|
|
|
|
|
NYC
Depending on how you have your fonts set, this will say different
things.
But if you type "NYC" and then enlarge it and change it to "wingdings"
font,
you get a (poison sign) and a (Star of David) with a (thumbs
up.)
Or, "Death to Israel, yes!"
I wonder why Bill Gates would have that in there?
I'm not accusing, so you weenies put your whips away, I'm saying
"I wonder why..."
An
Alternate Plan of Attack
September 20, 2001 © 2001 The Daily Brew
From: bushblowsus@yahoo.com
Subject: last time, I promise
BC,
I'm only going to write about this one last time,
as you've ignored seven
of the last eight emails, and you'll probably
choose to ignore this one as well.
It's just that today's opinion about the Afgani
people went just a tad too far.
For example, you say, why don't they pick up some
sticks and go after the Taliban?
Or something like that.
Well, I imagine it is because the Taliban has
machine guns and rocket launchers
and tanks and Allah knows what else. Good Koresh,
are you really that stupid?
Jeff, I'm at least as stupid as you think
I am.
I'm talking about the people who live in Kabul.
Are you saying they never see a Taliban
soldier who doesn't have a machine gun or rocket
launcher or tank aimed at them?
Think how our people were overrun in Somalia.
You're saying the starving-to-death Somalians
can fighter better than the hungry Afghans?
Why can't the Afghanis sharpen some sticks, and
when the Taliban soldier turns his back,
run him thru the neck and take his machine gun?
Is that so hard to imagine and pull off?
And what made you think screaming insults at me
would help?
Yeah, we fought for our freedom. But then again,
we didn't have gun control advocates in 1776,
so our freedom fighters had the same guns as
the British. Plus, we had a little thing called French
intervention. Without the French, we'd have lost,
old pal old buddy o' mine.
And let's not forget that, when the Afgani people
did have guns (supplied by us), they fought off
the whole Soviet army. The Germans couldn't do
that, neither could the Poles, the Czechs,
the Serbs, or anyone else in the history of the
world.
And a century before that, they drove the British
out - and without the help of the French.
So get your history and your cultural geography
straight before you continue
making really really dumbass comments like today.
I don't need a history lesson to know a man can
be ambushed.
Didn't you just say these rebels whipped the
Soviet Army?
How could they do that, since the Russians had
tanks and rocket launchers?
I don't have any names for you, but several of
the fastest guns in the American west
were killed simply by shooting them in the back
- that was 150 years ago.
Why can't the Afghans do what was done 150 years
ago?
And one more thing. You think a certain someone
usurped democracy and stole the presidency?
If you are so sure, why don't you pick up a stick
and go chase him out of the White House?
Now you know what it feels like to be an Afgan.
Jeff Crook
PS. Don't you dare say, "What's your solution?"
I sent it to you
four times. You ignored it.
If I was in danger of starving, I'd take drastic action.
I wouldn't whine about how many caves and hills were in my country.
I would pick my timing and my location and kill a soldier and take his
machinegun and try to convince some freedom-loving friends to join
me.
By the way, I searched my mail and you have no other e-mails to me,
at least not under
the same name as this location. It's possible those other four were
downloaded at the house
(I'm at work) but whatever you sent in your letters didn't scare me
into not printing it.
Knowledge
Gained the Hard Way
Just a week ago, we were so very different
by Ray Hartmann
From: pipecover@mediaone.net
Subject: quote
You wrote:
> I don't have a name for this, but we should have a "zone" or something
where someone
> can mention an idea without having to be tarred with it for eternity
if it's a bad idea.
Hey bigmouth: I know
the name for it.
It's called a fuckin'
rathole!
--pipe
Pipe,
Sure, I could take my time and produce one or two well-thought
out columns a week, like the
good writers - Lyons, Conason, Parry and Shemo, but bartcop.com
is more instant than that.
It's hard to produce an issue (or two) per day, knowing people
will jump on any poorly-written
sentence as "proof" that I've gone to the other side.
...and what's with you?
On Sunday you're my friend.
On Monday you hate my guts.
On Tuesday you're my friend again ...and what's today?
Wednesday? Of course - it's time to hate BartCop
again.
BTW, your daughter writes to me.
Have you thought about the shame she'll have to endure when
she realizes that her Dad is a foul-mouthed stalker at bartcop.com?
...and have you considered AA? .
It’s
the Oil
Never
mind the pundits, the root cause remains the same
by my good friend Johnny
Angel
Excerpt:
Once again, America’s twin addictions,
that of its people to cheap gasoline
and its corporations to billions of petro-dollars,
has led us right into the proverbial pit.
Having learned very little or forgotten
a lot in the wake of the oil embargoes of the 1970s,
America is as strung out on the fossil-fuel
jones as any Bonnie Brae Street junkie is on Mexican tar heroin.
Quotes
"Barbara Olson, off camera, was the nicest,
sweetest person you'll ever meet."
-- Larry King, Monday's USA Today
But Larry, too bad the only Barbara Olson we ever got to know
was that on camera
partisan liar who couldn't exhale without saying, "...just
like Bill Clinton."
Maybe, Larry, if you would've reined her in some when she spewed
those vicious lies,
there might be more respect for her in her time of passing.
Ask BartCop
From: tdouglas@watersorb.com
Bart,
I was watching the Barbara Walters interview with
Karen Hughes last night
when I nearly fell out of my chair. Hughes
said that the terrorists hate our way of life.
She also said they hate the way we select our
leaders.
“Unlike the terrorists, our leaders are elected,
not appointed.”
Has she had a lobotomy?
Ted
Yes.
From: ScottDavs@aol.com
Subject: Let's clean up our own back yard
I learned to my horror that the United States
has a school for latin Americans where assassination
and torture are taught so rightist regimes can
remain in power, even if unpopular. See more about
the School of the Americas at www.soaw.org .
Reagan loved them. They trained Noriega.
While we get so self-righteous about the sneak
attack on New York and Washington,
we have been schooling South Americans in as
much. No wonder so many hate the U.S.A..
We can break the cycle of violence against civilians
first in our own back yard.
We also spent millions on Ho Chi Minh, Hussein
and bin Laden.
How many more bin Ladens are learning the ropes
in Georgia, U.S.A. right now?
How many more blowbacks have to occur before
we learn of our folly?
People who do not share our values: the
rule of law, Democracy, human rights etc.,
are only our friends as long as it is convenient
for them, and us.
They turn on us regularly. You reap what you sow.
Scott
Proof before
war
by BartCop
Click Here and help spread this important message.
Quotes
"Let every nation know, whether it wishes
us well or ill, that we shall
pay any price, bear any burden,
meet any hardship, support any friend,
oppose any foe to assure the
survival and success of liberty.
-- JFK, January 20, 1961
From: bob@rockbridge.net
Subject: Scribbling
Bart,
I suspect that most folks find talk about aircraft
that fly in seemingly impossible ways
a better subject for Art Bell than Bartcop.
But, I too have seen these craft in action..
Contrails that twist and turn like a childs scribble
in the sky.
And last night about 11pm eastern, there was
a prodigiously loud sound
from an aircraft that flew over my little patch
of Virginia.
It was not the usual loud jet noise from a low
flying F/A-18 out of Norfolk.
This plane was up there (flying high altitude)
but the sound as it passed over filled the air.
The Aurora is my bet.
CHARACTER
MATTERS
by Fred W. Crawford
Great
story over at 
about the big show Friday night.
This is just one line of guests from the announcement:
...and Bruce Springsteen, Sela Ward, Robin Williams, Stevie
Wonder and Neil Young,
with more to be added.
...you know, ...I have half a mind to do some live chat thing & watch the show.
I like Sela ward just fine, but Springsteen, Wonder and Young
are hueueueuege on their own,
and I could use some Robin Williams right about now, how 'bout
you?
Click on the BartCop E! logo for the entire list of guests.
This is to raise money for New York & Washington.
Report from
New York
by Rich in
New York
Pataki just announced that all children of WTC
victims
will be going to college on the state's dime.
Nice.
Nice move.
That "bogus" footage at CNN?
Subject: CNN FOOTAGE AUTHENTIC
Barb at Snopes.com has the real story (as always):
http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/outrage/cnn.htm
But in a nutshell, the story was conjecture reported
falsely as real.
The footage of Palestinians celebrating in the
streets is most assuredly authentic.
Furthermore, the guy who made this bogus claim has recanted:
http://uk.indymedia.org/display.php3?article_id=11546
Kronos
Kronos, thanks for that.
It's too bad we have to question the integrity of our news sources,
since most of them are such blatant whores for whatever falsehoods
pay the most.
More toons at http://www.geocities.com/tbhpolitoon
Good stuff, Tim.
From: drobinson@postmark.net
Subject: The Best Wing
Like you, it takes me several viewings to pick
up on stuff and I've only seen "Pockets" twice now...
but I think Jed never actually got around to
confronting his dad the headmaster about the pay inequities
Mrs. Landingham brought to his attention--after
his dad cuffed his ear for criticizing a teacher in the
school paper for banning certain books from the
library.
Am I right?
If so, even more poignancy, more guilt and regret.
I agree: TV isn't s'posed to be this good.
Deidre Robinson
Deidre, that seems to be the case.
It would've been nice to see the scene where he told her he never even
got to bring up the subject.
Every time I see that scene I thank Koresh for the completely happy
childhood I had.
My parents never even raised their voices in anger, and the idea of
a Dad giving
a backhand to his son for having an opinion is beyond my comprehension.
...but it was a damn good show - and the premier is next week!
From: mrsteve@nyct.net
Subject: kudos and huzzahs
Hey BC: The Price for the Clinton Penis Hunt piece
may just turn out to be your masterpiece
-- absolutely brilliant stuff. Re: Fallwell and
Robertson, however, I'm surprised nobody's mentioned
the blindingly obvious fact that if 9/11 happened
because God, pissed off at the insane reverends
laundry list of evil liberal stuff, then there
must have been an awful lot of abortion, pornography et al
some years previous that we didn't know about,
or else how do you explain God's withdrawal of
protection from us during that whole Pearl Harbor
thing?
Good point - and another thing...
In last night's West Wing, Mrs. Landingham said,
"C'mon, Jed, you know God doesn't cause drunk
drivers."
Fair enough, ...but when someone survives a car crash,
they always claim God's divine hand reached out to save them.
It seems either God is in charge or he's not.
They want it both ways.
I don't have a name for this, but we should have a "zone" or something
where someone
can mention an idea without having to be tarred with it for eternity
if it's a bad idea.
I get these ideas a lot, and usually just print them because
I can defend them.
Since Sept 11, I've gotten at least 100 e-mails about the poor
Afghani people
who hate the Taliban as much as we do, and that we can't bomb
them back to
the Stone Age because that's where they currently live.
If these people are so put-upon, why don't they fight back?
We've seen what twenty young punks with kitchen knives can do,
so why don't the Taliban-hating Afghani people take back their
land?
By nature, the oppressors have to be a minority or it's a democracy,
right?
If the oppressors are a minority, why don't they take them out?
Why don't the people of Afghanistan grab a kitchen knife or a
goddamn sharp stick,
of that's all they can afford, and take out the nearest Taliban
goon on the corner?
If they're living in such a backwoods shithole that makes life's
not even worth living,
why do they lay back and accept it like a Senate Democrat?
I can't keep up with all the names, but Tom Burnett was on Flight #93 last Tuesday.
"There are three of us on this plane who are
going to do something about this,"
Burnett told his wife on that fateful day.
Check this out:
"We believe these victims to be heroes,
who sacrificed their lives to prevent further chaos,"
Father Daniel Cardelli said Tuesday at a memorial service for
Burnett in Danville, Calif.
Burnett's cousin, Janene Beard, said that she is proud of her
cousin's courage.
"We knew immediately that he would be one
of the passengers who said,
'No, we're not going to take this,'"
she said.
You see?
It's called "courage."
It's what heroes have.
Why doesn't Afghanistan have any heroes?
America didn't become the world's greatest superpower by whining.
We told our oppressors to take a fucking hike (sorry, UK) and
we fought and died for our freedom
Why won't Afghanistan fight and die for their freedom?
Todd Beamer, another hero on Flight #93, was heard by a GTE operator
to say,
"Are you ready? Let's roll."
Why isn't Afghanistan ready?
Why can't they roll?
Don't they want it bad enough?
Bill
Maher calls U.S. 'cowardly'
Loses FedEx as a sponsor
That was a really stupid thing to say, Bill.
Were you planning a lengthy vacation in the South Pacific?
Have you made enough money to retire?
Is that what you're saying?
I'm all for freedom of speech, and I think Bill just used the
wrong words. I think he meant to say,
"You can't question a man's committment to
his cause if he's willing to die for it,"
but "the Americans are cowards?" Not a brilliant
career move, Bill.
From: Pax441@aol.com
Subject: You just left my Favorites list too....
Doves, my ass!! How about reason versus
passion?
Your knuckledragging attitude only leads to more
death and destruction.
Where were you during the Vietnam and Gulf War
conflicts?
You got any family members you would like to send
off to get revenge for you?
Go out and rent the movie, "The Three Kings".
Look back in your history book to the day April
30, 1975, when the US military left Vietnam.
What happened to the Vietnamese supporters of
the US on that day?
We already have enough beer-bellied, draft-dodging
low-life who are trying real hard to be manly.
Get Mrs Bartcop to put your ass in the
touring car and take it down to the Marine Recruiter.
I was celebrating two broken femurs during Vietnam and I was too old
for Bush's Bungle in the desert,
but not many people care enough to ask, thanks.
So, you're saying you'd never fight anyone under any circumstances?
Or are you just saying New York and DC aren't worth fighting for?
...and bartcop.com was once on your favorites list?
From: mortfrom@tir.com
Subject: What did they expect?
BartCop,
Rochester Jim noted that, "Bush showed up late,
trembled, wept and prayed."
Of course he did.
He promised he'd do as much in debate 1,
when asked about how he'd handled a crisis in
the past.
"Ah hugged that man, and cried with him, and
got out of the way
to let the FEMA man do his job."
Isn't that pretty much what he did here?
After all, he got a mandate to hug and cry and
get out of the way, didn't he?
Mort
Mort, good point.
Yeah, Smirk always knows what to do in crisis. During a GOP primary
debate,
they asked him what he'd do to solve a fictional oil crisis of the
future..
So what was President Mensa's answer?
"I'd ...I'd, ...I'd tell those
drillers to ...keep drillin'."
Geez, Smirk, thanks for the inspiring leadership.
Then, afterwards, Bob Schieffer said "Bush was really in command."
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright © 2001,
bartcop.com
Thanks for the
fumble, Dude.
