Republican red-ass specialist
POLITICS-SARCASM-FINE
TEQUILA-VEGAS
|
||||
|
|
||||
|
Hagel Cheats BlackBoxvoting Bill of Rights
Dead
|
 |
|
Bart Cook BartCop Sports BC Entertainment Buzzflash Daily Howler Arianna Huffington Demo U-Ground Eric Alterman Gene Lyons Joe Conason Greg Palast J M Marshall makethemaccountable MWO Mike Malloy Molly Ivins Project 60 Smirking Chimp BartCop Stocks coming soon Takebackthemedia Vegas Report |
|
Please visit our sponsors
Quotes
"Because he's funded by [Bush family] friends
in Saudi Arabia. Bin Laden is back living with
his sponsors, his benefactors.
Do you think Bin Laden planned 9/11 from a cave in Afghanistan?
I can't even get a cell signal from
Queens."
-- Michael
Moore, on Bob Costas' HBO show, when asked why Bush hasn;t taken
bin Laden
"This
guy is still alive? I ordered him killed after the oscars. Condiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!"
Excerpt
The resolution, which was to be presented
to the 15-nation body Friday, would shift
control of Iraq's oil from the United Nations
to the United States and its military allies,
(They mean the B.F.E.E.)
with an international advisory board having oversight responsibilities
but little effective power. A transitional
Iraqi government, which U.S. authorities have said
they hope to establish within weeks, would
be granted a consultative role.
Another Bush handjob.
They took control of that oil the day the first serviceman died.
Bush used that day to say, "We shed
blood for this oil, so we're taking it."
The idea that any entity on the planet can have "oversight responsibilities"
over
these thugs would be funny if we didn't have 145 dead Americans
just buried.
And gee, the Iraqi transitional government?
They're 100 times less powerful than the UN, which is completely
powerless.
Bush and his crime family will steal all the oil they want until
greed takes a holiday - which is never.
Now Bush has a trillion dollar war chest to buy his very first
national election.
With the help of the Bush-is-God media, who has a chance against
them?
Sidebar:
We have a bookkeeping nightmare, but we
will try to get thru it.
Sometimes people send $10 with a note that
says "for BartCop Radio."
The new system allows for a manual conversion
of that amount to a month of BCR,
but there are those who sent $3, $5, $15
or $17, (for which I'm very grateful) but odd
amounts are more difficult to convert,
which causes my IQ of 64 to quiver and quake.
You know me - I'm not crazy enough to complain
about getting too many contributions, and I know
some of you are credit card-phobic, but
right now I can't afford a secretary, or even a temp employee
to help with the conversions, so maybe
during the transition, we can come up with an idea how to
handle individual, snail mail, month-to-month
subscriptions.
if you have any ideas.
I need all the help I can get.
Santos Cleared of Wrongdoing in Derby Victory
Excerpt:
Jockey Jose Santos was cleared Monday of
any wrongdoing in riding Funny Cide to victory
in the Kentucky Derby, sources told AP.
Santos met with Churchill Downs stewards who
investigated whether he held something
in his hand besides his whip as he won the race
One source said there was no evidence Santos
used an illegal device to win.
Stewards decided to investigate after The
Miami Herald published a photo and a wild claim.
A Herald reporter brought the image to
the attention of the stewards, who have ultimate
authority over race results.
Funny Cide's trainer, Barclay Tagg, said,
"If
you can move the reins and move the sticks (whip)
and still get rid of something you have
to be a pretty good juggler," the trainer said.
Hmmm.... I wonder if Tagg reads bartcop.com?
And remember that the Miami Herald is a whore newspaper,
screaming lies to attract attention to their false stories.
Shame on them and every whore media outlet who screamed,
"Scandal!"
The media in this country lurches from one false handjob story
to the next, all the time ignoring
the major crimes of the B.F.E.E. with their false wars,
criminal president and the stolen $11 trillion.
Question for the 'President'
Sir, looking at these easy even-for-you to read graphs,
...you seem to be taking America in the wrong direction with your tax cuts for the super rich.
Will you, right now before these cameras, be willing to bet your second term on your theories?
If the deficit continues to grow and employment doesn't make
a dramatic comeback this year,
will you step aside in 2004 and give the Democrats the opportunity
to do a better job?
...after all, they won the popular vote when you were appointed president.
Quotes
"Colin Powell didn’t know where any weapons
of mass destruction were. Bush didn’t know either,
despite what he said...It was all a
lie. Now, this week we find out perhaps invading Iraq wasn’t about
chemical, nuclear or biological weapons.
Perhaps it wasn’t about getting rid of Saddam, because today
we don’t even know where he is. Perhaps
it’s about the $7 billion contract Kellogg Brown & Root is
getting not only to put out oil fires,
but also to operate oil fields and distribute the oil. Perhaps there
is nothing to the fact that Halliburton
owns Kellogg Brown & Root. And perhaps there’s nothing to
the fact that the contract was non-competitive.
But perhaps, what we are seeing is that the war is
about oil after all, despite the administration’s
current protestations. At least, it seems, there’s more
evidence to support that theory than
the one that states the war is about weapons of mass destruction.
And I know whom I’m not going to believe."
--Ralph E. Wirtz, Perhaps
it is about oil
Iraq
in danger of starvation, says UN
They had plenty of food before Bush murdered Baghdad
Excerpt:
Iraqi agriculture is on the brink of collapse,
with fears that many of its 24.5 million
people will go hungry this summer. A special
assessment prepared by the UN
agency's staff in Rome, with crops and
poultry being especially hard hit.
VCR Alert
Lots of TV tonight - some of it good:
Kimberly only has one or two more chances to be kidnapped on 24.
Remember, all the action has taken place in one day. Have you
ever heard of
some woman being kidnapped 18 times by 17 kidnappers in one,
single day?
The once-funny Frasier is about "Duo ducks into
a closet," Sounds like hilarity to me,
followed by Watching Ellie, which nobody is.
NBC's whore promo department
continues to call JL Dreyfus, "the funniest woman on TV," even
tho they took her off the air.
NYPD Blue might have a decent episode, but we might
end up watching Lucky, on FX, instead
Sure enough, Dave has former Iraqi POWs, and he's
proven he can handle anything.
From: carson koch
Subject: Oooo the mayor of London
Graham
Alleges a 9/11 'Coverup'
If Bush is innocent, why can't we see the report?
Excerpt:
Sen. Bob Graham on Sunday accused the Bush
administration of engaging in a
"coverup" of intelligence failures before and
after the Sept. 11 attacks to shield it
from embarrassment, and said the war with
Iraq has allowed Al Qaeda and other
terrorist groups to become a greater threat
to Americans than ever before.
Graham, former chairman of the Senate Intelligence
Committee, also accused the
administration of jeopardizing the safety
of Americans by blocking the release of
a landmark congressional report on the
government failures that preceded the attacks.
He also said the White House has withheld
from the public important information about
the continued existence of terrorist cells
in the United States — including some with
ties to foreign governments that the U.S.
has been afraid to go after.
"By continuing to classify that information
the American people have been denied
important information for their own
protection, for the protection of the communities,"
Graham said on CBS News' "Face the Nation.
"Kill
him. I want his family dead, too!"
The Trouble with Experts
Excerpt:
I shouldn't even mention guys like Michael
Medved. I can remember him soft selling his social agenda
to a willing market, seems like as far
back as Ronald Reagan days. He started off as "some kinda media expertola"
claiming to have some sort of "inside scoop"
on that old evil of evils: Hollywood. I can remember him and other
right-wingers claiming that Hollywood had
the market cornered on sin, and they were all out to turn America into
a commie-pinko paradise, and/or that rock
lyrics were tainting our youth with "backward messages" that had to be
the sourcebook of all evil (just ask him,
he coulda proved it back then!). Thank goodness those clean-cut rappers
came along and ran off all those evil ol
rock bands, huh Michael?
.
Maybe you noticed?
I've hardly mentioned Rush lately.
I haven't been listening to his show.
I've been fasting from the Rush hatred until BCR gets started.
But today in the car, I heard him spew some hate about that Jayson
Blair guy,
who was fired from the New York Times for ...lying?
Wait - you can get fired from the Whore Times for lying?
ha ha
That's like getting kicked out of Guns n Roses for
doing too many drugs,
yet that happened to their first drummer, Steve what's-his-name...
I'm still sore from Bush's Iraqi handjob, and I can't take another
one for a little while.
I think I dislike the Whore Times more than most Republicans,
but the ever-resourceful
Pigboy and FOX News found a way to turn this into a lynching
of another black man.
Sidebar:
I never heard of this guy, if I ever quoted
him it wasn't memorable.
I have nothing against him besides he another
example of a lying press whore.
.
But Rush saw this as a chance to throw some red meat to the racist
bastards who love him.
I only heard a few minutes, and I think he opened Monday's show
with it, but he said,
"This is what happens with affirmative
action. This is what happens when liberals want to
(starts with the baby talk) fix all
the world's problems by forcing diversity on us."
Translation:
"This what happens when you
hire a nigger."
It was clearer than Lake Concha.
Rush got to say that, without actually saying the specific words.
Trust me, Rush's audience got the message much clearer
than Lake Concha.
That's why Rush is Number One.
He's a genius at saying it without saying it.
And when you call him on it, he'll hide behind the printed transcript
and say he never meant any such thing,
that he was only talking about "government influence on hiring
decisions," but we all know how the GOP
really feels about the black man eating in their
restaurants and sitting in their theaters.. Rush made all
those
millions by saying what you can't say out loud anymore, how everyone
knows the niggers are shiftless,
lazy rapists of innocent white women
This is what built Rush's empire, it built Hannity and O'Reilly,
it built FOX Whore News, it built MSNBC.
Your Richard Mellons Scaifes and your Rupert Murdochs further
the Reagan legacy of making America
comfortable with it's extreme and overbearing racism. We're
going back in time, not moving forward..
If only there was political party that stood for equal rights
and equality for all Americans. I'm so old,
I remember a party with JFK's optimism, Johnson's power, Martin's
dream and Bobby's idealism.
I also remember a very popular president who took on the NRA,
Big Cancer, religio-frauds and racist pigs
and they spend a quarter of a billion dollars lying about his
reputation until much of the public believed them.
...maybe in the next five days we can make our first, tiny dent in their evil machine.
Just released!
Click on banner for more
“At a time when the American
people and, indeed, the people of the world,
find that facts
are in such short supply, this book is a must read. In times
such as these,
the truth is one of the greatest of all casualties. This book
provides quick
First Aid to those who seek relief from the propaganda
and disinformation
that flood the major information channels.”
-- Cynthia McKinney, former
U.S. Representative, Georgia,
Dixie-Chicked for
telling the truth?
Quotes
"Whoa, ...where we you when I was in high school?"
-- Dave to swimsuit model
and Survivor winner Jenna Merasco after she
admitted
she took off all her clothes for peanut butter and chocolate
Wait, did I hear that right?
Tonight Dave has some of our boys who were Iraqi POWs?
Hell, I'll watch that.
...and
now, a message for 
phones.
...can you blow me now?
takes five steps,
...can you blow me now?
takes five steps,
...can you blow me now?
takes five steps,
Letter to Ann Coulter
Hey Annie,
Do us people with a brain a favor and check
yourself into the nearest asylum.
Why you're given a platform to espouse
your Nazi takes on life, I'll never understand.
You're obviously a very sick individual
and need help to deal with all that anger you carry around.
Either that or get a supersized dildo to
release all that constipation.
By the way, Coulter, two questions:
1. Why aren't YOU married and have kids since that's the only ways women can validate themselves in your parallel universe?
2. Where's YOUR military experience? You
jumped on Clinton's back for not serving in Nam and now you stick up
for a rich boy who went
AWOL from his National Guard duty so he could go drinking and whoring in
Mexico
while bashing a decorated
Viet Nam veteran?
Get bent!
Donna
Donna, as you can see, she is bent - over Ronald McDonald's lap.
Subject: Clinton
Bart
President Clinton got his education the
old-fashioned way - he earned it. By all accounts,
he did a damn good job too. Perhaps
it was the lack of silver spoon, or just plain intelligence.
Chelsea is making the same path for herself,
from what I've read she's a top student.
I think I got a C, then a D in first year biology, but I remember
bits and pieces.
If your parents are two of the sharpest knives in the drawer
you'll probably be smarter.
(I'd like to apologize to Barbara Bush for that vicious and heartless
slap in the face.)
I have a theory about why the media attacked
President Clinton so rabidly.
The corporate owners were being forced
to pay their fair share of taxes, and now they're not.
Simplistic reasoning, but just as logical
as any other theory out there.
migs
Migs, don't forget racism. Racism is always near the top of the
list for the GOP.
It's their basis for fundraising?
"Give us money or Willie Horton is coming
for your daughter."
Clinton was a friend to the "dark people,"
and that's what fueled The Arkansas Project
that fed wacko theories to Ken Starr and
the House Impeachment Committee. Read Brock's book,
read Susan McDougal's book - better yet,
read The Hunting of the President by Conason & Lyons.
Clinton, the "nigger-loving anti-Christ"
was president, and he had to be taken down at any cost
No matter how many fabricated rapes they
had to finance, he was coming down.
In Oklahoma, racism is big.
Hell in the Dust Bowl, racism trumps everything but college football.
Want proof?
How do you think Uncle OJ Watts got elected in this klanland
of cock-fighting, snake-handlers?
Sidebar:
Quote from Uncle
OJ Watts, former Oklahoma Coporation Commissioner:
"There nothing wrong with taking money from companies you regulate."
...and they promoted him from Corp Commissioner to US
Rep with that conscience in his head?
Uncle OJ Watts maybe be a for-sale crook and a traitor to his
race,
but he could run that triple option better than anybody
in Austin.
Looting Iraq
Over the weekend, I found myself with a rare 15 minutes with nothing
to do,
so I clicked on the Mile
Malloy archives stored at Whiterosesociety.org
I clicked on his most recent show from Friday, May 9th, and I'll
be damned if Mike wasn't going off
on Bill Bennett's hypocrisy just the way I would have.
Matter of fact, he read part of my Bennett rant
from Volume 1061 - Sand
Trap (It's about 28 minutes in)
I was so flattered.
I wish I could afford Mike to vocalize all my issues -
they're much better when he reads them.
Remember, Mike's on from 9 PM-Midnight EST at MikeMalloy.com.
If you can't listen live, check out Mike's archives at Whiterosesociety.org
Marty's
E! page
A whisp of Michael Dare
'Holland-Dozier-Holland' & the Hollywood Rockwalk
(damn deserving, too)
Miramax, Michael Moore & 'Fahrenheit 911'
MTV & NBC picked up Carson Daly for another year
Lisa Marie Presley rocks London
Lucasfilm Animation
NBC announces new shows & cancellations
And the Tony Award nominations
click
Subject: http://www.ericblumrich.com/topgun.html
I tried to see this over the week end.
Just a Black window.
No scroll button Nothing but black.
689kb or somethings...
The bottom goes blank when it finishes.
What is the Top Gun stuff 'held over"?
http://www.ericblumrich.com/topgun.html
Peace,
Jim
Jim, it did the same thing when I used Netscape (old version)
but it worked fine with Internet Explorer.
Wish I could be more help.
Was there a full moon last night?
From: edw
Subject: Clap-on Clap-off
Excerpt:
Ever wonder if you could really win an
honest debate?
He's begging for a shot at Ol' Bart in a debate room.
Sometimes begger's dreams come true.
..
A Democrat fights
back
Fiction,
by Mike Palecek
Joe Coffee tells his wife that he’s thinking
about running for Congress.
"Coffee Joe" speaks out against prisons and the
military and no one takes him seriously - at first.
Soon, terrified establishment politicians
try to stop him.
Joe Coffee’s Revolution provides a refreshing alternative perspective.
Click Here to order your copy today.
[Palecek is a former reporter, federal prisoner, and seminarian.]
Also by Mike Palecek: Click Here
Subject: What Language does Bush Speak?
I was watching CNN today and listened in
awe as our "leader" add a new word
to the English vocabulary, "gooder".
He used this word at least four times!
Where the hell did that come from?
The American majority sure did not pick him
as our president based on his use of the
English vocabulary! And in defense of Texas,
it is not a word used in Texas that I ever
heard!
How about a top ten list of new words bush
has added to the English vocabulary!
Is America gooder now?
God help us!!!!
Rey
Rey, my son, the American majority clearly went for Gore, but
those Bush bastards have crooked friends
in high places who usurped the will of the people and installed
this monkey in a man suit as our king against
our wishes and against the Constitution. Democracy was raped
that cold winter day in December of 2000.
While prepping for the coming radio show, I found a sound file
where MonkeyMan says,
"I won't let my opponent define me in
terms that are untrue and unright."
Just to be sure, I looked up "unright" in Merriam-Webster's
online dictionary and they
said "Knock it off, Bart"
and suggested that "unbright" might be what I was looking for.
Yeah, that says it all... The unbright President.
Isn't it funny how the Bush twins used their
father's worldwide influence to
arrange a pot party with Ashton Kutcher,
the guy from, "Dude, where's my car?"
Those poor girls seem to have inherited their father's brains, isn't that sad?
I got a letter recently scolding me for
not running that "Bush girls get stoned" story,
so I looked for it - and Bush's good puppy
whore press has totally buried that story.
Go ahead, go to Yahoo News and search for
Kutcher or "Jenna Bush."
You get three non-stories on Kutcher and
ZERO
for Jenna Bush.
To help the never-elected fraud fool the
people even more, the American news media
has a total blackout on this story, to
curry favor with the Corrupt Commander.
But oh, remember when Chelsea was seen wearing a white top?
Every newspaper in America screamed,
"Chelsea
was seen in public in a state ot total
arousal,"
and it played on every TV program
for a week and every talk radio host got a sore hand from it.
This kind of shit pisses me off, and it's
this kind of stuff that will make 
the most blistering thing many of you will
have heard in a loooooooooooong time.
You should not look forward to my
losing my temper - it's something to be avoided and dreaded.
The good news?
Bush can't threaten Australia with reprisals
for telling the truth. As always, to get the news the rest
of the world gets, you have to leave America
because the Bush-happy whores who own all the
media here are covering for the unelected-fraud
by hiding the crimes of his adult children.
Excerpt:
Kutcher adds: "The Bushes were underage-drinking
at my house. When I checked outside,
one of the Secret Service guys asked
me if they'd be spending the night. I said no.
"And then I go upstairs to see another friend,
and I can smell the green wafting out under his door.
I open the door, and there he is, smoking
out the Bush twins on his hookah."
What?
Those little sluts, before they were 21,
were illegally drinking, smoking dope and spending the night
with older Hollywood types that the GOP
says are so very dangerous to America?
No wonder the Bush good-puppy press covered up this story.
If people knew the truth about the B.F.E.E
and their drug/booze/casualsex habits,
the Oil Monkey might lose those always-important
evangelical dollars.
We went back thirty years to investigate Clinton's zipper,
but the current crimes of the Bushies always get ignored
and buried.
Update:
This whole
thing is
going to work.
Tommy Mack lands tomorrow. With this new Perkel set up, we're
there!
Is
worth $10
a month?
Click
Here to donate heavy.
PayPal now accepts credit cards
Today
is Bart-technology day
We had our boys in the lab construct a wormhole that enables
instant
MP3 transfers.
If you haven't been listenting to those lame first attempts at
radio because it takes too long
to download on your slow-ass 56K modem, there's no longer any
wait. None at all!
Christian helped me with a test last night, and she got instant sound - and she's on a Mac!
So, as of today, May 13, 2003, all BartCop Radio clips will have
our BartCop Wormhole
technology, and as far as I know, nobody else had this.
This is a BartCop exclusive unless everybody but me knew about this all this time.
Click Here to hear Tally the BartCop Weather Vixen - just back from Mexico!
Click Here to hear the first, smaller batch of phone calls
Click Here to hear the second, longer batch of better calls
I have another 20-30 calls in the pipeline, so don't give up if you haven't heard your call yet.
Call 918-493-1500-
you have two minutes to rant away.
Did anything make you mad today?
Tell us about it! 918-493-1500
Has anybody seen the bridge?
"Bart will be right back to open another can
of whoop ass of some helpless ditto-monkey," or
"He has a hammer and he's not afraid to use
it - Bart will be back after this," or
"Back from cleaning his big boots, BartCop
is ready to dispatch another monkey," or
"I pity the fool who brings up 'Somalia' when
Bart's in the house," ...stuff like that.
Send your batches of snappy liners to
Shopping
online?
Use this portal and they'll
throw bartcop.com four cents.
....
....
....
....
....
....
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright
© 2003, bartcop.com
I see no harm in this picture - do you?
Maybe someday Shirley will call to say "Hi!" on the Bart-Phone
at 918-493-1500
That would be cool.