Wishing the 'President' would stop
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Quotes
"Have you heard about the newest political
party? You probably saw them, and mistook them for someone else.
They are called The Invertebrates.
Their symbol is the jellyfish. Dozens of Democrats, especially the leadership,
have defected to the Invertebrate Party.
Their “I sorta kinda disagree with W” squishiness has made possible
the triumph of the fanatical. Their
opposition to the agressive rightwing is so spineless, so timid, and so
lacking
in confidence, it can only be described
as cowardly."
--Cheri Delbrocco, Squishy
Soft Democrats
Sounds like something you could've read on bartcop.com two years ago
Excerpt:
The Bush administration's top Medicare
accountant has calculated how millions
of senior citizens would be affected by
bringing private managed care into the
program, but the administration won't release
the information.
More smoke and mirrors from the biggest thieves of all time.
They've stolen $11 trillion that we know of.
They're selling retirees down the river for HMO contributions.
The press doesn't care, and the Democrats are still undead.
"Old
people are just going to die, anyway. What's the problem?"
Quotes
"There'll be more niggaz."
-- Snoop Dogg, to Entertainment
Weekly when they asked how his
new movie "Soul
Plane," would be different from the original "Airplane."
That Snoop, he's the shizzle...
Excerpt:
The media keeps portraying Bush as "popular,"
but political pros know that any incumbent whose "re-elect" number
is below 50% is in deep doo-doo. According
to the latest Ipsos-Reid poll, Bush's "re-elect" is now at 40%, only 2%
above his lowest-ever rating of 38% - despite
"winning" two wars and strutting his "stuff" [puke!] across the deck
of the U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln. Meanwhile
32% will "definitely vote for someone else," and 26% will "consider
someone else."
If Bush was an ordinary Senator with dismal
poll numbers like these, the pundits would be calling him "endangered"
- or, more accurately, "dead meat." Of
course, the corporate media knows this, so they are trying to switch the
election
handicapping game from popularity to campaign
cash, since Bush is busy pumping it by the oil barrel. But Karl Rove
should study the lyrics of the old Beatles
tune - "I don't care too much for money, money can't buy me love."
Larry by the Sea
Subject: shock radio for the left?
Bart,
Al Gore's attempt to put "Shock Jocks from
the left" on the radio may have some issues
with the average American. Right
now, ditto monkeys believe in the rightious indignation
portrayed by so many of the radio and TV
political commentary, that belief may also exist
within those who only listen now and then,
but have no ability to form their own opinions.
Now with the forcing of left radio, it will
be far too easy for these guys to discount the anger
and frustration by those "Shock Jocks from
the left" as nothing more than political acting.
What do you think?
Jay in Boise
I think if a lefty talk show host came along who didn't lie all
the time, took calls from all sides,
and told the truth, it could be lots of fun and very entertaining
to listen to - and profitable.
Remember, the Democrats won the last three presidential popular
votes.
It's just a falsehood that the majority won't listen to the radio.
Quotes
"There are two things we cannot find:
weapons of mass destruction and jobs."
-- Rev. Jesse Jackson, the 32nd annual
Rainbow/PUSH Coalition conference,
I'm mailing a bunch of stickers out today.
You can get bartcop.com stickers free.
Send a stamped, self-addressed envelope to
bartcop.com
PO Box 54466
Tulsa, OK 6-74155
Donations accepted, but not required.
Crooked court rules sodomy is OK
Excerpt:
In a big victory for homosexuals - and
anyone who expects a little privacy in the bedroom
- the Supreme Court yesterday struck down
all laws against sodomy.
The unexpectedly sweeping decision threatens
many laws that seek to govern sexual practices
for gays and straights alike. It also could
pave the way to legal gay marriage.
The invasion of privacy has always been a GOP staple. Look
for their 2004 convention to be all about,
"Bush's federal government needs to know what
you're doing in your bedroom at all times."
Poindexter
and I and Team Bush will be watching you...
Voter
remorse and Gray Davis
by Wiliam Safire (R-Congenital Liar - sometimes)
Excerpt:
"Is "recall" of a leader - elected by a majority
for a fixed term but supported only by a minority - a good idea?
Or should voters stare decisively at election
returns and wait for retribution on a regular schedule?
Really - why bother to vote?
The Diebold machines will record your vote for Bush, and if a
Democrat somehow wins,
the GOP will collect signatures to recall him - because the
Democrats refuse to fight back.
Quotes
"This is how it is in the United States these
days, massive tax cuts for the very wealthy at the same time
that the poor and working classes are
being clobbered by reduced services and myriad tax increases of
one kind or another. For the students
at CUNY, who have traditionally come from poorer backgrounds,
a tuition hike — in this case $800
a year — is the equivalent of a tax increase. And it can be devastating...
So it's too bad, kids, but this is
the new American reality. You'd be getting a windfall if you were one of
the high rollers at Bechtel or Halliburton.
The game is rigged in their favor. But all you want to do is get
a decent education so you can make
something of yourself. We can't help you with that."
--Bob Herbert, Tax
Cut Casualties
...and while Bush rapes America and loots the Treasury, he has
high approval numbers
because the Democrats are too afraid to yell, "Stop, you
bastard!"
Back
to Basics
by Gene Lyons
Excerpt:
...Republicans charged that Clinton bombed suspected
Iraqi WMD sites to distract
the public from his Oval Office sex antics,
as if THAT were possible. But it's beginning
to look as if economic sanctions, UNSCOM
inspectors and cruise missiles may have
done the job. (Actually, some defectors,
including Saddam's son-in-law, whom he had
murdered, claimed the Iraqi dictator had
the forbidden weapons destroyed after the
Gulf War, which admittedly begs the question
of why he refused to prove it.)
Bad
drivers right lane
by multiple award-winning Christian Livemore
Excerpt:
Georgians are a graceful people. We — (And
I count myself among this group so that
later when I say less kind things I can
include myself in that, too. And also to have the
good stuff on record for possible use by
the person who introduces me when I accept
my Nobel Peace Prize.) — We are warm, pleasant-spirited,
gently funny and patient people.
We are not, however, good drivers. (Bless
our hearts).
You know who you are.
Click to visit our new sponsor - WorriedShrimp.com
Is
there anything left that matters?
Nuns against the Unelected Liar
Excerpt:
First, they said they wanted Bin Laden
"dead or alive." But they didn't get him.
So now they tell us that it doesn't matter.
Our mission is greater than one man.
Then they said they wanted Saddam Hussein,
"dead or alive." He's apparently alive
but we haven't got him yet, either. However,
President Bush told reporters recently,
"It doesn't matter. Our mission is greater than
one man."
Finally, they told us that we were invading
Iraq to destroy their weapons of mass destruction.
Now they say those weapons probably don't
exist. Maybe never existed. Apparently that doesn't matter either.
Except that it does matter.
It matters to Ali, the Iraqi boy who lost
his family and both his arms in a U.S. air attack.
Why
did you do this to me, Mister Bush?
Quotes
"When Bush donned his coronation clothes and
landed on the deck of the Abraham Lincoln,
I felt like the skunk at the victory
party. I went around asking the partygoers: Where were the WMD?
What bothered me wasn't just whether
we'd find the weapons we were warned about with such terrifying,
repetitive certainty. The question
was whether it would matter. Would the American people care if
they'd been conned into conflict?...The
real lie is that the administration didn't (dare?) make its
essential case for war. And the real
shame is not that we were conned but that, so far, we don't mind...
The famous flight suit may end up at
the Smithsonian as the emperor's new clothes."
--Ellen Goodman, An
American empire built on deception
Subject: Peak Oil
Bart, Jonny Fingers here, from scenic New Jersey:
A minor correction: The point of peak
oil is that we are running out of oil, but more particularly,
that there is a finite amount of it,
and once you have extracted more than half of it, feces begins
to strike rotary oscillator.
Naturally, you go for the cheap stuff first
(does not apply to tequila, I am aware) and the problem is
then that supply will naturally start dwindling,
raising prices, but also extraction costs per barrel will
start rising--as your Texas/Oklahoma input
illustrates. This puts you on a curve of exponentially
increasing costs, which run off the top
of the page as you approach zero oil remaining.
It's not the running out of oil so much
as the process of gradually running out.
Jonny
Jonny, we have plenty of $40 oil - more then we could ever
use in our lifetime.
But Middle East oil is so clean and cheap (except for the lives
lost) that we can't
afford to drill the $40 oil. Trust me, I know dozens
of former oilfield workers.
They work at Wal-Mart now because there's no longer any use for
their skills.
I've been awash with fresh Bixby corn, and the best is still to come.
You get there at 8 AM in the morning, and you see the loaded-down
pickups pull into the parking lot.
They're giving this stuff away, about 30 cents an ear.
That's like 50 cents a shot for some fine Chinaco Anejo.
"Temptation" is the first strain in, and it's beautiful.
It's about 20 percent white corn, about 80 percent yellow.
It's real damn good, and it'll only get better.
This first crop out is always a test, but the big guns
come in around July 1.
The Merit and the Silver King are coming.
Last year, it was Merit and Silver Queen.
They found a way to bring sex into luxury corn.
This silver is the Chinaco anejo of luxury Bixby
corn.
After those Silver King ears catch a few weeks of
104 degree, late June, Oklahoma afternoons,
- that brings out the very best flavors in God's best maze.
The big harvest is coming.
When I eat corn on the cob, especially after 46 weeks without
any,
as I finish, someone always mentions that I look like Sonny on
the Causeway.
I use that same joke every year...
Dueling Quotes
"I do not steal."
--Republican Rep. Darrell Issa, second-term
San Diego area congressman, the driving force behind
the effort to un-elect
Gray Davis Rep.
Issa was charged in San Jose auto theft
"I am not a crook.”
--Richard M. Nixon, the most crooked man ever in the White
House until 1981
The Corbomite Maneuver
Excerpt:
The Corbomite Maneuver presented the first
mention of Poker in the classic Star Trek series.
Though not used much in the Classic Trek
series, the age-old card game would become a regular staple
for episodes of The Next Generation. The
bluff and ploy, Kirk used to win his "hand" in this episode,
The Corbomite Maneuver, would be used again
in the mid-second season episode, The Deadly Years.
"Not chess, Mr Spock ...poker!"
The World Poker Tour was really wild last night on The
Travel Channel.
In the second hand we saw, a guy won $513,000 with a pair of
twos.
...a pair of twos.
Even if you don't play poker, you know a pair of twos blows, but
it won a big hand last night.
Then, it rained and the satellite shut off for an hour.
When the signal came back on, the "Tiger Woods of poker" was
gone.
I got to see the ending, but it would've been fun to see the whole thing.
...and we're still looking for Hold 'em Poker players.
Subject: spike and agreeing with reich wing sheep
You said:
I hate to agree with right-winger (and former
funnyman) Kelsey Grammer,
but he's right when he says Spike Lee is
crazy to sue Spike TV for stealing his name.
Wow, you are wrong on that one.
If Mr. Spike wants to keep the integrity
of his name, and the BRANDING that comes with it
(by branding i mean the advertising usage, not
the physical branding, like cows) then he needs
to sue EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING that
threatens it.
Thems the rules.
B223
You'd be totally correct if
Spike owned that word.
I'm sure he'll lose on common sense grounds.
You failed to address the key point: "Spike"
was around long before Spike Lee.
If TNN tried to be "The Snopp Dogg Channel,"
then Snoop would have the rights
you suggest to protect his name. But "spike" was a noun and a
verb decades before Spike was born.
How could you miss that point?
I believe Spike put up $2.5M to give to TNN if he loses this fight.
I sure wouldn't want a piece of that bet. Spike's going to lose
that money.
Quotes
"I find it strange that a pro-life politician
like George Bush is planning to kill as many
Iraqi children as he can in the name
of oil or whatever it is that's really on the agenda."
-Bill Blaikie, Manitoba Member
of Parliament,
...and for some goddamned reason, the churches are behind
Bush's insane murder spree.
You can't trust the churches. They can be bought like the
media and crack whores.
FLASH (secret US Gov't Doc. exposed)
INVASION
OF ICELAND?
Excerpt:
Mission Scope: Island populated
by 279,384 (July 2002 est.) people.
Required forces to invade Greenland (85,000
troops est.)
Mission Duration: 6.5 years
Mission Cost: should be three times $25.billion
Hey Bart,
You wrote:
> They say Gore would've been president if not for the gun issue.
You seem to be forgetting your previous
lies now:
It was Ralph Nader and the Green Party
that stole the election from Gore.
Best regards,
Billy
There was no lie to forget.
Nader's ego gave Bush the votes to get close enough to steal
it.
If Gore was less anti-gun, they say he would've won.
If Gore had listened to me, he would've won.
If Jews hadn't suddenly come out for Buchanan, Gore would've
won.
If Gore's brother was governor of Florida, he would've won.
If Gore had taken his home state, he would've won.
If they had counted the votes, Gore would've won.
If Gore had insisted on real debates, he would've won.
If the media had told the truth during the campaign, Gore would've
won.
If Gore had allowed Clinton to help him, he would've won.
If the Democrats had been 1/3 as aggressive as these guys,
he would've won
There was no lie to forget.
Quotes
"Ass kissing has gone on to a profound degree.
It's pervasive throughout all these news organisations.
They need the FCC to behave in certain
ways. In order to do this we have got to go along to get along,.
...the FCC's decision to relax media
ownership rules came shortly after the end of the war. Any reporter
who would see that quid pro quo in
any other business says: 'No, that doesn't happen in the news business'."
--Michael Wolff,
US
TV networks 'kissed ass'
So true, and so sad.
It's one thing to constantly call Gore a serial liar, and constantly
report that Bush is an intelligent, qualified candidate,
but to scream, "This war must be fought
to protect America," when they knew it wasn't true is a f-ing
crime.
I'd like to see 80 percent of the American media in jail for
helping Dim Son murder Baghdad.
Excerpt:
Suppose that we grant the administration
all of that. We will stipulate that Saddam had
unknown quantities of nuclear, biological,
and chemical weapons. We can go even further
and say that he even possessed photon torpedoes,
fasers, Green Goblin suits with gliders,
and formulas for turning the dead into
zombie combatants, all of which could be readied
for combat on 45 minutes notice.
And we certainly have no choice but to keep those
weapons out of the hands of those who would
willingly attack us and who "hate our freedoms.":
Klitschko
should sue the "referee" by law
.
Click
Here
Excerpt:
I believe Vitali Klitschko needs to sue
by law the "referee" who voluntarily stopped his fight with Lewis,
in which Vitali lead on points, despite
of his face cuts, and to obtain via court the decision to finish the
remaining 6 rounds of this match with a
compensation for the referee's voluntary actions.
I didn't see the fight.
I'll try to catch a rerun, but every account I read said Lewis
was looking all of his 37 years that night.
Subject: An Ann Coulter Moment
Yo BC,
Here's an exchange from my job last night (I work at a large, not-to-be-named bookstore):
Guy: [Breathless with anticipation]
I heard the new Ann Coulter book came out today! Do you have it?
Me: [Checking the computer with
my usual efficiency] Yes, we should have several copies.
Guy: I looked around but couldn't
find it. Can you help me?
Me: Of course, sir.
So we go looking around. It is on
a cart that had yet to be shelved. I pull it off and hand him the copy.
He looks at the cover, checking for a sale
sticker.
Guy: Is it on sale? It was
on sale on your web site.
Me: No sir it isn't.
Our web site is actually run by a different company, and they set their
own prices.
We don't have any control over their offers.
Guy: Oh, ok [ he pauses, looking
at the book cover, thinking it over].
Me: Come on...Coulter's a big-time
conservative, she'd WANT you to pay full price for it.
Guy: [smiling and laughing] Hey,
I'm not that big a conservative.
Have a good night [walks out without buying book].
Now, to be fair, I never screw with anyone
at work, but this was a young guy, around my age,
he seemed pretty cool, and he seemed to
have a good sense of humor. Which, it turned out, he did.
And I did try to sell it to him...
But as for Ann trouncing Hillary on the
sales chart:
Copies of Living History
sold at my store in the 1st 24 hours after initial release: 85
Copies of Treason sold at
my store in the 1st 24 hours after initial release: 2
Also keep in mind...my store is in the
South, the cradle of the confederacy where
hating Hillary and the Dems is an accepted
lifestyle choice.
Robert E
The
Litmus Test On Racial Diversity
by Joe Conason
Excerpt:
The misuse of racial politics for cynical
court-packing is an old story, dating back to 1991, when the
previous President Bush nominated Clarence
Thomas to the top bench. Everyone understood that
Mr. Thomas, a figure of no great distinction,
had been hand-picked due to a happy coincidence of
skin color and political coloration.
Although he had benefited from affirmative action throughout his
career, Mr. Thomas had since displayed
his eagerness to deprive others of the means by which
he had advanced.
At the time, columnist George Will confessed:
"Trashing the truth is now so natural in Washington
that there were only worldly smirks and
shrugs when George Bush began the Thomas saga by
saying two things he and everyone else
knows are untrue—that Thomas is the person best-qualified
for the Supreme Court, and that his race
was irrelevant to his selection."
George Will told the truth?
Jesus, I'm older than I thought.
Handjob for sale
Musings
from the Outland
by Richard L. Fricker
Excerpt:
Well, what shall we talk about, the six
British troops killed in Iraq or the one American,
bringing our total to 19 since the war
was declared “over” by fearless leader. How about
the road map to peace, you know the one
Ariel Sharon shoots in the ass at every opportunity….
I guess George isn’t folding the laundry
fast enough.
Subject: hits
Just wanted to share this picture of my
webhits to
give you some idea what one of your links
is worth.
Thanks!
Mark
Not only are bartcop.com readers the smartest, they are the most handsome, too.
Click to Enter
Quotes
"How big a dick do you have to be, for Osama
to refuse to work with you?"
-- Jon Stewart, on the report that
Osama refused to work with Saddam
Burned Iraqi Children Turned Away
Excerpt:
"On a scorching afternoon, while on duty at an
Army airfield, Sgt. David J. Borell was approached
by an Iraqi who pleaded for help for his
three children, burned when they set fire to a bag containing
explosive powder left over from the war.
Borell immediately called for assistance.
But the two Army doctors who arrived about an hour later refused
to help the children because their injuries
were not life-threatening and had not been inflicted by U.S. troops.
Now the two girls and a boy are covered
with scabs and the boy cannot use his right leg.
And Borell is shattered.
"I have never seen in almost 14 years of Army
experience anything that callous," said Borell,
who recounted the June 13 incident to The
Associated Press.
"Screw
those kids. We have to save money to give my friends another tax cut."
Our first ever "must have" store stuff.
Deficit mugs and shirts!
Give to your snotty GOP brother in law.
Prove what a genius Clinton was.
Make your ditto-head friend feel some shame!
Marty's
E! page
JFK, 'I Am A Jelly Doughnut' & Berliners
Links to the network fall schedules
Fresh BAGnews
BBC-America rocks tonight. First, it's 'Coupling'.
Then it's 'The League of Gentlemen',
where Monty Python meets Twin Peaks. Capping it is 'Graham
Norton' -
a chat show with a campy host who inspires Dustin Hoffman to tell
a joke that set off the
censors (the infamous 'c-word'). Because they're British &
rational, the word stayed in.
'NOW With Bill Moyers' on PBS
'Monk' on USA
Robbie Robertson (& others) honored in Canada
Bono's getting death threats
(No surprise there - he's a liberal)
Robert Cray takes protest music to the blues
The Judy Garland Museum
Glastonbury outdoor music festival happens this weekend
Michael Powell has: "the only job in Washington my dad thinks is
harder than his."
Pete Townshend speaks.
Sharon Osbourne takes blame for Jack's problems
Hindu's celebrate re-conversions
Steve Wynn to start naming things after himself
Some bad boys
And, a Griffon vulture
click
Subject: bartcop.net is looking for the REDASS!
Hey BC,
I ran into www.bartcop.net while looking
at the alexas.com link in your June 26 issue.
You have succeeded in getting a anti-bartcop
mirror-congratulations!
I think you should lay waste to this guy
and see if he will actually stand up for his BS.
His heroes include the usual suspects:
Rush, Ron, and John Wayne
(Huh, how could he not like W more than
John Wayne?).
Anyway, The Bird, as the author of the site
refers to himself, is a sad man in desperate need of the redass.
regards
J
That poor bastard - he's a child in a grownup's
world
We had a debate once, it's in the back
issues.
During the mauling, he called Clinton a crook.
I asked him how Clinton's crookedness compared to Bush the smarter,
since Bush had to pardon Reagan's cabinet to bury the global
crimes of Iran Contra.
His reply?
"Pardons? What pardons? Bush never pardoned anyone! Liar!"
It's hard to debate someone who doesn't know eight years of history.
I received a t-shirt in the PO Box from Melinda.
It shows a picture of John Fund behind bars and he's saying,
"I'm John Fund. I beat women. Got any?"
ha ha
Fight back with BartCop Radio
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Subject: Margaret Carlson
I think you hit on it the other day. Marg
is still very bitter at her divorce...hence when she
looks at Bill Clinton or any other Dem
now, she sees the "bastard" who told her he loved her...
but ended up schtuping the babysitter.
Nothing like remaining objective.
jj.
In other words, she's lost her ability to be a professional?
Or maybe she just turned whore for the money...
Call the
918-493-1500
You have two minutes to rant away.
Quotes
"Even though WMD, Saddam and bin Laden have
not been found, Democrats fear being called unpatriotic
and unAmerican for speaking out about
the wrongheaded and arrogant way pre-emptive invasion has been
carried out without the support of
the American public and the world. And on it goes. The majority of the
American people agree with the Democrats
on protecting the environment, safeguarding Social Security,
improving the quality of education,
and providing greater access to affordable health care. They agree that
corporate criminals must be prosecuted
and that corporations must start ponying up their share of taxes
instead of being given “corporate welfare”.
All of this makes the inability by Democrats to provide
alternatives and opposition to the
Bush administration even more infuriating. And shameful."
--Cheri
Delbrocco, Squishy
Soft Democrats
Have a good time today - that's an order.
Shopping
online?
Use this portal and they'll
throw bartcop.com four cents.
Read the Previous Issue
It had everything.
Copyright
© 2003, bartcop.com
Maybe someday Shirley will call to say "Hi!"
on the Bart-Phone at 918-493-1500
That will be cool.