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Weekend-Monday, Nov 10-12, 2012 Vol 2970 - Justin Petraeus

In Today's Tequila Treehouse...


	GOP asks: What went wrong?
	Apple just Can’t Keep Up
	Obama (finally) Wins Florida
	GOP Mulls $380M Loss
	CO, WA Eye Pot Tourists
	Pee Bush Files in Tejas
	Sports Clothier Alyssa Milano

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Quotes

"If the GOP can't win in these circumstances, what do we do when things are good?"
-- former Virginia Republican Rep. Tom Davis Link

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GOP asks: What went wrong?

Link

The search for answers about What Went Wrong began almost immediately on election night,
a signal that some had already been mulling the possibility of a loss for some time.

"Two obvious lessons so far: It's a different country demographically. And mediocre candidates
lose elections," says Tucker Carlson, a Fox News contributor and chief whore at the Daily Caller.

"The country is changing too fast," Carlson wrote. "Most people have the sense that America
is different demographically from what it was 20 years ago. But unless they've been reading
the latest census data, they have no real idea. The changes are that profound. They're also
permanent and likely to accelerate. In order to remain competitive outside Utah, ha ha ha ha
the GOP will have to win new voters, and soon."

First, the GOP needs to hear from its enemies what it's doing wrong because their friends
(billionaires Pigboy, hannity, FOX News) will just lie and say, "You're doing great!"

Second how can you expect to win with all that hate talk when the electorate you're
trying to woo consists of "kikes." "chinks," "bitches" "niggers," and "wetbacks?"

Send e-mail to Bart

I say they are lying.
The weekly price fluctuations of meat and cheese have to cost more
than the 25 cents per pizza that some experts claim Obamacare will cost.

Since Bush's recession, Pizza Hut has been selling $18 large Supreme Pizzas
for just $10, proving they have tons of wiggle room on price and they still make a profit.

They just want to punish YOU for wanting health care, the bastards.

Is 25 cents a week too much to pay for health care?

Apple Can’t Keep Up With Demand
They say iPhone 5 "more popular than Jesus"

Link

Apple launched the iPhone 5 about seven weeks ago and it still isn’t easy to find on store shelves.

Apple sold more than 5 million new iPhones during the first weekend of availability and heavy demand
has kept the phone in short supply. Shipping times for new orders remain at 3-4 weeks leading into the
holiday shopping season, which could impact Apple’s December quarter. Why is it still so hard to buy
an iPhone 5?

Apple’s manufacturing partner Terry Gou says his company is still having problems
building enough iPhones to satisfy heavy global demand.

I have an idea:
Why not open an iPhone assembly plant right here in America?

Of course, they'd only make $150 from each iPhone instead of $250,
but wouldn't that be a great way to repay America for Apple's wild success?

Send e-mail to Bart

Subject: Nugent/Victoria Jackson

Does the Left have anyone that sounds even remotely as insane as these two?

No.

Perhaps a comedian who was making a joke, but these two were just
making their racism more obvious for the general public to see.

I suspect the next (R)nominee won't be seeking their endorsements .(wishful thinking)
Great site
Sandman

Sandman, thanks for that.

Send e-mail to Bart

Click for More

Obama (finally) Wins Florida
They can't count for shit in Florida

Link

Obama was declared the winner of Florida's 29 electoral votes Saturday, ending a four-day count
with a razor-thin margin that narrowly avoided an automatic recount. Why can't Florida count?

No matter the outcome, Obama had already kiucked Romney's bny ass
and now has secured 332 electoral votes to Romney's slave-states 206.

With almost 100 percent of the vote counted, Obama led failed bullshit artist Mitt Romney
50 percent to 49.1 percent, a difference of about 74,000 votes.

I heard that Romney and his gang were cocky on Tuesday, figuring they had it won.

Remember they kept insisting that the polls were wrong?
How many times have I said it - lying to yourself is the worst sin.

Somehow they came to believe their own bullshit - lots of Republicans did - even Pigboy.
And when the mighty Obama machine roared, they were all shocked to see the truth.

The hate all non-whites Party can no longer win national elections in America.

How about that?

Send e-mail to Bart

Shop Online
Amazon.com sells everything

Find your purchase then come back here
and use this link
and they'll throw the Treehouse some pennies...

Amazon business has been slower than usual.
I hope things pick up between now and Christmas
because Amazon has become my financial lifeline.

Extra thanks to those of you who
use the Bartcop.com Amazon Portal.

Someone bought an Epson Color Inkjet Printer, Copier,
Scanner ADF, Fax. Prints from Tablet/Smartphone.
for just $101 so Amazon donated $4.00 to the Treehouse,

I think everyone needs a printer/copier/scanner/Fax

Remember this Christmas Season - Amazon Gift Cards

They give TWICE.

We need to generate some Amazon sales between
now and Christmas or it may not be a happy New Year.

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Astrocat

GOP Mulls $380M Loss

Link

Republican-leaning independent groups were supposed to be a key to victory for Mitt Romney.
But they ended up being among the big losers of the race, spending an eye-popping $380 million
on ads to oust "that Kenyan" only to come up woefully short.

Unleashed by the Citizens United decision, which allowed wealthy individuals and corporations to
spend freely to influence elections, these super PACs and other groups played a big role in GOP
victories in 2010 — only to fall down badly two years later in their first national electoral test.
Republican losses from the top of the ticket on down are forcing the groups' leaders to re-examine
their strategy and determine how best to spend their donors' money going forward.

I could fix this for you bastards in an afternoon - just stop the hate.
But that won't work because hate is the glue that keep you klansmen together.

Your choices are to become less hateful or die, and something tell me you'd rather die
than treat "darkies" and "queers" and "bitches" like they were human beings.

Send e-mail to Bart

Quotes

“Obamacare is the law of the land,”
-- Speaker Boehner, but will the Teabagger Army agree? Link

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Subject: My Brush with Greatness

Link

I would like to keep the Greatness stories going.

I know you have more stories to tell...

Send e-mail to Bart

Marty's Entertainment Page
has new stuff every day

Marty's TV Listings are the best!

Marty always has good stuff.

Click on the E!

See more at http://mariopiperni.com

Bartcop's Computer Repair
We can fix your computer

We do the repairs magically, over the Net.

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Today's Mystery Car

Link

Subject: last issue's Mystery Car Link

Bart, that's a nice picture of the 1958 Ford Fairlane 500 Skyliner.
This was their retractable hardtop, not as elegant as today’s folding hardtops,
but still a neat piece of engineering.
Graham

Send e-mail to Bart

Bartcop's Holiday Gift Guide

CO, WA Eye Pot Tourists
Oh no, not extra money for our economy!

Link

Marijuana legalization in Colorado and Washington state open the door for marijuana tourism.

Both marijuana measures make marijuana possession in small amounts OK for all adults over 21
— not just state residents but visitors, too. Tourists may not leave with their pot, but they can
purchase and use the drug in those two states without violating the state law.

Of course, that's assuming our president can get past his illogical jihad against harmless flowers.

That was very much in doubt Friday as the states awaited word on possible lawsuits from the Department
of None-of-our-Business asserting federal supremacy over drug law. Obama may be a doormat for
Boner and The Bitch, but he gets reeeeeeeal tough with pot smokers and poker players.

So the future of marijuana tourism in Colorado and Washington is hazy. But that hasn't stopped
rampant speculation, especially in Colorado, where tourism is the No. 2. revenue generator.

The Colorado law goes into effect Dec 6.
Maybe Obama could at least be man enough to state his intentions?

In the past, he's tended to surprise and jail a bunch of innocent people.
That's a very cowardly way to dismiss the will of the people, Barack.

The Pot Initiative in Colorado got 50,000 more votes than Barack, who won the state.
Once we get a legal ruling, we should have a BartFest in Aspendam.

Have you ever seen the Maroon Bells? They are pretty goddamn spectacular.

Send e-mail to Bart

New Feature: Spot the Mountain Goats

Link

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Sirius XM

Midnight - 3 AM

mikemalloy.com

Beautiful Nature Picture

GOP having major freak-out
Led by the vulgar Pigboy

"I'm so mad I pooped my pants!"

Link

Surprising no one, the vulgar Pugboy didn't take Tuesday night's decision well, saying Wednesday:
"I went to bed last night thinking we're outnumbered. I went to bed last night thinking all this discussion
we'd had about this election being the election that will tell us whether or not we've lost the country.
I went to bed last night thinking we've lost the country. I don't know how else you look at this."

No, asshole, you lost the election because your product is pure shit.
Less taxes for the super-rich and higher taxes for the little guys?
Why did you think that stinker would sell?

Then there was nutjob Victoria Jackson.

I can't stop crying.America died.
- Victoria Jackson

But not all is lost:
America's dead but Jesus Christ the same yesterday, today, and forever.
- Victoria Jackson

And then the requisite conspiracy theory:
Military Absentee Ballots Delivered One Day Late, Would Have Swung Election For Romney
- Victoria Jackson

There there was Ted Nugget:
The man who gave us "Cat Scratch Fever" can't stop clawing at the president.
In April, Nugent was summoned to a meeting with the Secret Service after making
some ugly comments at a NRA convention in St. Louis, Mo.

"If Obama becomes the president again, I will either be dead or in jail by this time next year."

That's fine, Ted.
We can live with either scenario.

Would you like to borrow my Glock for a minute?

Send e-mail to Bart

Know your Supermodels

Link

Subject: Last issue's supermodel Link

Bart, that is the spectacularly beautiful Petra Nemcova.
She was severely injured in the Indian Ocean Tsunami
which killed her boyfriend and untold thousands of others.
Jeff H

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Letterman’s Farewell to Mitt

Today's Mystery City

Link

Subject: last issue's Mystery City Link

Dear Bart,

That’s downtown Denver with Mt. Evans ( a fourteener you can drive to the top of in the summer)
in the background. The building on the left is the old United Bank tower (we call it the cash register
building now). It gained dubious notoriety a number of years back when a number of guards were
murdered during an early morning robbery. A suspect was arrested, tried and acquitted. No one has
been arrested for the murders since. Whoever did it, got away with the money and got away with murder.
Keep hammerin!
Greg in Centennial, CO

Send e-mail to Bart

Pee Bush makes Filing in Tejas
Hotsi Totsi - Pee Bush is another Nazi

Link

George Pee. Bush, son of Jeb Bush and nephew of Der Monkey Fuhrer, has made a
campaign filing in Texas that is required of candidates planning to run for state office.

Why can't they just get jobs, like normal f-ing people?
The Bushes and the Palins see scamming the stupid as a great and noble goal.

The filing report does not specify what office Bush might steal, and he had no other details.
Pee Bush did not reply to an email asking WTF? and no phone listing for him could be found.

The bad apple said in September his goal was to run for office and acknowledged
that he had yet bdecided which office he wanted his crooked family to steal for him.
"I might start with something small, like governor," Pee boasted

Raised in Florida, Pee decided to settle in Texas. He runs a consulting firm (Yeah, right!)
and has been active in Hitler Youth Republican Party outreach to college students.

Send e-mail to Bart

What is today's History Mystery?

Link

Subject: last issue's History Mystery Link

Bart, that is Chester A. Arthur, the President who succeeded Garfield,
who was shot dead by an anarchist just months after being inaugurated.

I knew this one right away, only because my first writing assignment ever
(in the 3rd grade) was to write a short, 1-paragraph bio of an ex-President.
We picked by lot, and I drew him.

(11/6/2012: Best Election Night Ever!)
Kent G

Send e-mail to Bart

Astrocat Bonus

Subject: donations

Hope this helps, Bart
Rich in Royal Oak, MI.

Rich, thanks for that.
That was very nice.

Humor can get us thru the worst of times so we will keep on.
As my buddy Ray Coleman used to say, "Never quit!!"

Amazon.com is my best bet to staying on the InnerNets.
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Please remember the Gift Cards and the Bartcop Portal when you shop online.

It never hurts to check http://amzn.to/bartcop prices.

Sports Clothier Alyssa Milano

Check out almost 200 sexy and tasteful photos of Alyssa Milano

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Thanks to Blue in Seattle for helping me corral the hotties..[1]

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